Sophie
David seemed like a very kind man. He reminded me of my grandfather, except he had an English accent.
We had been waiting on the tarmac for hours. I felt so comfortable with David that I told him my real name.
I needed to use the bathroom, but I couldn’t get out of the car.
“David, can I use your phone for a minute?”
“Sure.” He handed me the phone.
I redialed Tom’s phone. Phil’s face appeared on the screen.
Ugh. I miss him so much.
“Hey.” He was worried about me. I could see the stress on his face.
“Hey.”
He was also trying his hardest to not get personal with me. I could see and hear it. Since his Petal slip-up, he had kept things all business.
“How far are you?” I put my hand on the side of the phone. I wanted to stroke his face.
“About three minutes until we land.”
“Okay. I need to use the bathroom when you land. Will that be all right?”
He softly laughed. “Yes. No problem.”
I loved his laugh. It was deep and sexy, and just made me feel happy.
Happy. I hadn’t felt anything happy since I’d last seen him.
I closed my eyes, then opened them. “Are you doing okay?” I shouldn’t have asked him that—it wasn’t fair—but I couldn’t help it.
He hesitated. “Just sorting security, so when we land we’re covered.”
My heart fell further. I wasn’t talking about business. “Okay. Thank you.”
“No thanks needed. This should have never happened.”
“But you came. Thank you.”
“It’s my job.”
Ouch. I looked away and blinked back tears. “Okay, see you when you land.” I hung up before he could see the tear drip down my face.
I wiped my tears away as they were landing and handed the phone back to David.
“Wow, that’s quite the jet!” David said.
“Yes, it’s the nicest one I’ve ever been on. Tom owns it.”
“He seems like a really nice guy. That Phil guy seems nice, too.”
“They both are. You are, too. Thank you again. You’ve been quite the hero today.”
David laughed. “This is the most exciting day I’ve had in a long time. You’re absolutely lovely, and the missus isn’t going to believe it when I tell her about my day.”
I smiled at him. “How long have you been married?”
“Fifty years in May.”
“Wow! Congratulations. That’s really awesome.”
His eyes locked with mine in the rearview mirror. “Do you have anyone special in your life?”
My heart thumped in my neck. “No, not anymore. I did a few weeks ago.”
I didn’t know why I disclosed that much to him, and realized at that moment that I’d thought about Phil and not Eric. That had never happened before. Normally if someone asked me that, the only person I would have ever thought I’d lost was Eric.
My pulse started to race.
“Well, life is short. When you find the right one, you’ll want to grab him.” David winked at me.
“How do you know when it’s the right one?”
He laughed softly. “Life is full of twists and turns, but when you find someone that will stick with you through the bad times as well as the good, you’ll know that’s the one.”
I smiled at him.
“Looks like the jet door is opening.” He pointed to the jet.
I looked out the car window, and Tom walked down the steps. David got out of the car and opened up the door for me.
“Thank you, David,” I told him, and got out. I ran over to Tom.
Tom hugged me. “Glad you’re okay, Sophie.”
“I think you need to listen to Phil and clean house.”
He nodded. “Yeah, that’s definitely happening.”
“I need to use your bathroom. Excuse me.” I left to get on the jet, and Tom stuck his hand out to shake David’s, who had walked over.
I ran up the stairs and went directly to the bathroom. I quickly went about my business, washed my hands, and walked back out.
Cindy was in the main cabin. I smiled at her. “Hey, Cindy.”
“Phil’s back there if you’re looking for him. I’m sure he’s going to be relieved to see you. I’ve never seen him like that before.” Cindy’s eyes were wide.
“What do you mean?”
“He was frantic about you. I was worried he was going to have a heart attack or something. Tom had to calm him down.”
I nodded. “Thanks, Cindy.”
I took a big breath and went back to the living room area. I stood in the doorway. Phil was standing up with his back to me and talking on the phone.
I walked up behind him and inhaled his amber-and-rosewood scent. My nerves started to calm down. I had been dreaming of that smell for the last several weeks.
My infatuation got the best of me, and I reached around his waist and hugged him tightly. I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him on the back of his neck.
He froze. He stopped talking and moving. After a minute, he said, “Get it sorted and text me the details.” He threw his phone on the couch, grabbed my hands, and removed them from his waist.
He stepped forward so he was out of my grasp and turned. “Sophie,” he said coldly.
My heart sank. He was done with me. “Hey. Thanks for coming. I’m sorry I caused you stress.”
“It isn’t your fault. It shouldn’t have happened.”
“If it makes you feel any better, I told Tom that you’re right and he needs to clean house.”
Phil gave me a small smile.
I stepped forward, and he stepped back. I froze. “Phil—”
Tom came in with David. “And this is the last cabin, and there’s a bedroom through that door.”
Phil stepped forward and held out his hand. “David, thank you so much for your assistance today.”
“It’s been a pleasure. If I had to spend hours with a client, I don’t think I could have picked a lovelier girl than Miss Sophie.” he grinned at Phil.
Phil gave him a sad smile. “Yes, she is.”
David looked between Phil and me, and his face dropped. “Ah.”
Phil and Tom looked at David in question. I looked down at the floor and blinked back tears.
Phil’s phone rang. He grabbed it and walked out of the room. “Hey, Laura.”
Tom put his hand on my shoulder. “Sophie, you okay?”
My eyes were wet, but nothing was falling out. I looked at him. “Yep, I’m fine.”
He looked at me like he didn’t believe me.
David pointed out the window. “I think your guards are here.”
Tom and I looked out the window. Two black cars had arrived on the tarmac.
Phil came back into the room. “That was Laura. She’s sending over our new hotel arrangements and rearranged Sophie’s schedule so the hackers can’t use it. I’ll go check out these new guys.”
Tom pointed to the couch. “David, please have a seat. I’m wondering if we can use your services for the remainder of our trip?”
Phil and I got into the back of David’s car. Tom sat up front with David. The privacy window was shut.
Inhaling his amber-and-rosewood scent again, I turned to Phil and reminded myself not to touch him. He’d made it clear on the jet he didn’t want me touching him. “How have you been?”
“Fine.” His eyes caught mine, and he quickly turned to stare at the privacy window again.
I looked down and started to fidget with my hands.
I think he hated me.
I officially hated myself.
I could see how much I’d hurt him. I thought I was the only one hurting, but he was too, and I had caused it.
I turned to him. “Phil—”
“Sophie, let’s not do this.” He stared at the window.
My hands and lip started to shake. I quickly turned my head to look out the window so I wasn’t looking at him. I blinked back my tears and willed my hands to stop shaking. I could hide my lip by looking out the window, but I needed to hide my hands, so I finally decided to put them between my thighs.
The ride seemed to take forever. I sat an inch away from him, feeling his body heat and restraining myself from touching him. I reminded myself to breathe, and from time to time, would wipe away the tears that I couldn’t blink away.
We finally pulled up to the hotel. Phil jumped out of the car the second it stopped. I quickly grabbed the box of tissues and blew my nose and tried to clean up my face.
David opened my door and grabbed my hand to help me out. He peered at my face, squeezed my hand, and gave me a sympathetic smile.
“Thank you again, David.”
“It’s been a pleasure, Miss Sophie.”
The bodyguard walked over and pulled me through the crowd that was starting to form into the lobby.
Tom and Phil were staying in town to clear up the security issues and decided it was best if they were also there to keep an eye on me. The new bodyguards had checked us in and took us to a meeting room off the lobby. Our rooms needed to be checked first.
The room was small and had a table for six people. There were two bodyguards, Phil, Tom, and me. It was torture.
The guards handed us our keys, and my eye caught Phil’s. I wanted to grab his key and tell him to stay with me as I had in Toronto. But I had ruined that option.
I had ruined us.
And I no longer understood why. In my effort to not feel, I was accomplishing anything but that. The pain of not seeing him was bad enough, but the pain of being near him like this was even worse.
Phil’s phone rang. “Ethan, I’m sorry, man. I forgot to call you. Everything is okay. Her phone broke on the plane.” He paused. “Yes, just a minute.”
Phil held out his phone. “Ethan wants to talk with you.”
I grabbed the phone, and my hand grazed against his. He didn’t move his hand for a minute, then closed his eyes and turned away from me.
I blinked back tears again. “Hi, Ethan.”
“Soph, you okay?”
“Yes.”
“Good. It sounded pretty serious.”
I looked over at Phil. “It was, but everything is okay now. Tom and Phil are here with me and sorting things out.”
“Okay… Soph, how are things between you and Phil? He was freaking out.”
I turned and stared at Phil. He stared back at me. “I can’t talk about that right now.”
“Sophie, whatever happened between you two, just tell him you’re sorry and you want another chance.”
We kept staring at each other, and I blinked back more tears. “I have to go, Ethan. I’ll text you my new number when I get a phone.”
“Soph—”
I hung up on him. If I’d stayed another second on the line, I was going to lose it. I didn’t look at Phil and handed him the phone.
Tom took a step toward me. “You’ve got interviews in two hours. We’re going to have them come to your suite for security reasons. Phil and I need to go over to headquarters. Dinner tonight?”
“Maybe. Can I tell you later?” I didn’t know if I was going to be able to sit through dinner, much less eat anything.
Tom scanned my eyes. “Sure. Let’s go check out our rooms, then.”
The guards cleared the path and got us up to our floor. There were three suites next to one another. Each suite had a door that connected to the other suite that could be locked or opened up. Tom was put in the first room, Phil in the second, and myself in the third.
As soon as I walked into my room, I stripped down and got into the shower. I had interviews I was being photographed for and needed to look presentable.
The hot water hit my face, and I started crying. I grabbed onto the rail and steadied myself as I sobbed my eyes out.
In my determination to not get hurt again, I had lost him. There was no going back, and it hurt worse than ever.
Years of trying not to feel had failed me. In my mission to not admit and hide my feelings for Phil, a new, scary revelation hit me. I didn’t know if the pain of losing someone was greater when you couldn’t see them, or if it was worse when they were right in front of you but no longer allowed you to have them.
Hot water cascaded all around me as I sobbed against the wall, gripping the rail to keep me from falling. When I finally stopped sobbing, I got out of the shower and tried to pull it together. As much as I wanted to crawl into bed and cry some more, I had to get ready for interviews.
I put a towel over my head and wrapped a second towel over my body. I started to look for my bags, but they weren’t anywhere. Phil’s jet bag was on my bed.
I stared at it as if it could magically turn into him.
A knock on the door pulled me out of my trance. I realized it was coming from the joint door. I took a deep breath and prayed that it would somehow be Tom so I wouldn’t have to go through the pain of seeing him. Slowly, I opened the door.
Phil had my suitcases. “I think they mixed up our—” He stopped and gulped. His eyes traveled over my body, then back to my face.
I had forgotten I only had a towel on.
My lip and body began to shake, and as much as I blinked back my tears, one slipped down my cheek. I turned and wiped it away, walked over to the bed, and went to grab his bag.
His hand went over mine and stopped me.
I froze.
He placed his body against mine, and his lips hit the curve of my neck. I closed my eyes. The flutter of his lips and warmth of his body pressed against me, and his arms wrapped around my waist.
“I’m sorry, Petal,” he whispered as his amber-and-rosewood scent consumed my senses once more.
My body trembled with emotion as tears dripped down my chin and onto the floor.
He turned me into him. “Shh.” He pulled my head to his chest.
“I’m so screwed up, Phil. I want to love you. I’m just so screwed up,” I cried into him.
“Shh, Petal. You’re not screwed up. You’re just hurt,” he whispered.
I sobbed into him. I wanted him. More than anything, I want him. But I was still scared.
He wrapped his arms around me tighter.
I looked up, and he put his lips against mine. His luscious, sweet lips that made me feel like I was his, and he needed me. Lips I’d thought I would never feel again.
His hands held my face. “You’re all I want, Petal. And I’m not going to hurt you. Just let me love you. Please.”
Eyes full of love for me drilled into mine. And I knew he would give me all of himself, but I had to let him.
I needed to let go of the past.
I needed to embrace the future.
I needed to trust him.
“Okay,” I whispered to him. “Love me.”
A tear fell down his cheek, and he leaned in and kissed me some more—a slow, savoring, delicious kiss that claimed me as his own.
His phone rang. He sighed.
“Go ahead—answer it.” I nodded.
Phil picked it up. “Hello.” He kissed me again and didn’t take his eyes off me. “Mm-hmm.” He kissed my lips some more. “In her suite, that’s correct.” Hanging up, he wrapped his arms back around me. “We’ll finish this later tonight. You have to get ready, Petal.”
“You’re going to forgive me?”
He looked at me and kissed me again. “Yes, I already have.”
“Just like that?”
“Yes, just like that.” He smiled.
I sniffled. “Really?”
“Yes. Let me grab your bags, Petal.”
I grabbed him. “Phil?”
He turned back to me. “Yeah?”
“Thank you for being here.”
He smiled and winked at me. “You’re welcome, Petal.” He walked over to the door and wheeled my bags in, put them on the suitcase stands, and opened them.
I grabbed his arm when he grabbed his bag off my bed. “Stay in my room with me.”
He stroked his hand on my cheek. “I will. I’m going to get out of your hair so you can get ready. I want a shower. I’ll be right next door. The door’s open, and you’re welcome to come in any time.”
I nodded. “Okay.”
“Get ready, Petal. Your first interview is in an hour.” He stepped into his room to go shower.
I went over to my bags and pulled out the outfits I would be wearing for each of the interviews. I dried and curled my hair, then put on my makeup.
Don’t fuck this up anymore, Sophie, went though my mind the entire time I was getting ready.
I looked at my clothes that were all wrinkled and took out the travel steamer I kept with me.
My assistants usually did this for me, but somewhere in the security breach I had lost them, and without my phone, I didn’t know how to find them.
Phil walked in as I was trying to figure out how to get the steamer to work.
“Well, this is a sight I bet people would pay good money to see.”
“Ha, ha!”
“You look beautiful.” He kissed me and held his hand out. “Give it to me.”
I slyly glanced at him.
“Come on. Time’s ticking.”
I handed it to him.
He went to the sink, filled the steamer with water, grabbed the electric transformer for the wall, and plugged it in. He hit the button, and within a few minutes, steam was coming out of it.
“Oh. So that’s how you do it!” I grinned at him.
He chuckled and started steaming my clothes.
“I think you would look really good doing that naked,” I teased him.
“Careful what you wish for.” He grinned.
His phone rang, and he put it up to his ear but kept steaming my clothes. “Hey, Tom.” He looked over at me. “She’s decent enough. Come on in.” He hung up.
“Decent enough?” I laughed.
“Well, it’s a robe, and you wear less on stage, so.” He shrugged and continued to steam.
There was a knock on the door. “It’s me,” came Tom’s voice.
I went and opened the door.
Tom walked in and shut the door. He grinned. “Phil, I didn’t know you were so talented.”
“Ha, ha!”
“I don’t know where my assistant is. Do either of you?”
They both shook their heads.
“We’ll try and figure that out,” Tom said.
“My manager, too. He really should be here for these interviews, but I guess the show goes on, right?”
“Sophie, is your manager not being here a big deal for the interviews? If so, let’s reschedule.” Phil looked worried.
“No, it’s okay. He wasn’t in Toronto and I handled it okay. But I do need to locate my team, especially to go over the concert. I haven’t played in the new Wembley stadium before.”
“We will make it a priority to locate them. The concert isn’t for a few days, so we have plenty of time to get you sorted on that,” Tom assured me.
“Okay. Thanks. How long are you both here?”
“I can’t speak for Tom, but I’m not leaving without you.” Phil gave me a serious stare.
I smiled at him and gave him a little peck.
Tom grinned at us. “Aw, did you two lovebirds make up?”
Phil’s face got a bit red.
I gave him a bigger kiss, then turned to Tom. “Yes, we did.”
Tom grinned bigger. “Good. It’s about time you two got your heads out of your asses.”
I smirked at him. “I think it’s time you go clean house and get your security’s heads out of their asses.”
“Touché.”
Phil went and unplugged the steamer and set it on the bathroom counter. He came back out.
I walked over to him and kissed him again. “Thanks.”
“Get ready, Petal. We’ll see you tonight for dinner, okay?”
I gave him a wink. “It’s a date.”