(1996/PolyGram Filmed Entertainment) DVD / VHS
Rave Reviews
“Bad Movie manna for fans of deliriously cheesy sci-fi thrillers set in the near future." —Edward Margulies, Movieline magazine
“A trashy, violent action film that will appeal to comic readers, curiosity seekers and prison inmates throughout the land."
—Janet Maslin, New York Times
“There’s a reason music videos don’t last 99 minutes, and should Barb Wire cross your path, you’ll know what it is."
—Kenneth Turan, Los Angeles Times
Plot, What Plot? If the plot of Barb Wire seems overly familiar, that’s because it was lifted—one might even say “ripped off"—from, of all things, Casablanca. Imagine the pitch meeting where the screenwriters suggested remaking the Humphrey Bogart classic, and replacing Bogie … with the bodacious (but talent-challenged) Pamela Anderson. Then imagine that no one involved in the project intended it as a comedy. The resultant film is a truly oddball combination of one part noble sacrifice, one part splatter film, one part soft-core porn, and two oversized parts T&A. Note to the filmmakers: When a noble sacrifice is made by a star clad not in a trench coat and fedora, but in stiletto heels and a bosom-boosting bustier, it loses at least a skosh of its nobility.
Barb Wire, a.k.a. Pamela, is a take-no-guff kinda gal who runs a dive bar in post-Apocalypse 2017. Like Bogie in Casablanca, she has run-ins with local Nazi types, still pines for an ex-love she’d do anything for, and when the chips are down she can be counted on to be on the side of the underdog. What she doesn’t have that Bogart did is the trench coat, a black piano player to tinkle “As Time Goes By," memories of Paris … or any discernible acting ability. What she has got that Bogart didn’t are the assets nature (and a surgeon or two?) gave her. And since Barb Wire is blatantly an exploitation film, those assets are front-and-center throughout. In fact, the film opens on an extensive, slo-mo striptease with Anderson thrusting her bazooms at the camera in such a way that, if the film were in 3-D, audience members’ eyes might get put out. Unfortunately for those drawn to this film by the chance to ogle Anderson’s ta-tas, they’re mostly contained for the rest of the film, though just barely. Halfway through she takes a bubble bath à la Jayne Mansfield, and in the big chase finale, her bustier threatens once again to unload its contents … but doesn’t.
The object of the film’s plot, other than Anderson’s physical assets, is a pair of contact lenses that will permit anyone wearing them to exit the police state in which this film’s characters all live—the 1990s equivalent of the exit letter Bergman sought from Bogart in Casablanca. Like Bogie, Pamela stands up to the “Nazis" who are after her old flame, and, like Rick, Barb makes the same sacrificial choice at the end. But in this ribald, risible, and decidedly Razz-able remake, the proverbial “hill of beans" is a pair of hills … and the film itself is full of beans.
Dippy Dialogue
Barb Wire (Pamela Anderson), impaling a patron with her stiletto heel for calling her by the nickname she hates: “If one more person calls me ‘Babe’!”
Razzie Credentials
Barb Wire was nominated for six 1996 awards, including Pamela’s “Impressive Enhancements" as Worst Screen Couple. It was “shut out" by Demi Moore’s similarly sleazy Striptease, and “won" only one award: Anderson as Worst New Star.
Choice Chapter Stop
Chapter 1 (“Opening Credits”): Pamela does the slo-mo, firehosed-down striptease that “establishes her character."
(Barb Wire); Temuera Morrison (Axel Hood); Steve Railsback (Col. Pryzer); Udo Kier (Curly); Xander Berkeley (Alexander Willis); Clint Howard (Schmitz)
by Chuck Pfarrer and Ilene Chaiken; Story by Chaiken; Based on a comic
strip by Chris Warner