Local Resident Blocks Dock With Manifestation—
7:30 AM, Eden. Ships attempting to dock in Sēt harbor this morning were met with surprise as a manifestation has appeared on its northern edge. It now has an additional dune of shining, silvery sand that prevents entry to large ships. Authorities suspect it possible to move the sand to a more proper location, although whether that will be allowable under legal restrictions regarding manifestation disturbance is yet to be determined. As of yet it is not known who has manifested their soul by the harbor, but hopefully the resident in question will be open to its relocation…
—The Eden Times
Yenatru’s finally finished his last class of the day and there’s absolutely no reason he’s going back to the library at all.
None. No reason. Zero.
Okay, maybe he’ll work on some Theurgy, or even do some reading for Basic Oceanography. Normal library things. At his normal bench. Just because he feels like it.
And if he’s scanning the shelves around him while walking to it, almost as if looking for someone… well, that just because he feels like it. For absolutely no particular reason. Yes.
Although, what’s that sound he’s hearing? Is it… muttering? Coming from… above him?
“Yes, yes,” he hears a familiar feminine voice say. “Throw God overboard.”
He looks up. And there’s Lucifer, lying down on top of a bookshelf.
Yenatru tries, and fails, to not overtly sigh in relief.
Lucifer’s reading something as she hums—is that an adventure novel? It doesn’t look very academic, and Yenatru’s not even sure where in the library she would have gotten it.
Yenatru quietly clears his throat, to make sure his voice is working properly. Then he says, “Um, hello again.”
“Oh, hello!” Lucifer attempts to sit up, but only narrowly avoids hitting her head on the ceiling. So instead, she turns to lie on her side, facing him. Kind of.
“Shouldn’t you be,” Yenatru says, “somewhere else? Out in the world? Doing something? I mean, not to be offensive, but…”
“Don’t worry about your wording, Yenatru,” Lucifer says, “you’re doing just fine.”
“Oh. Okay.” Yenatru looks back up at Lucifer. “How did you even get up there?”
“I climbed. Obviously.”
“Right.”
“But back to your other question… eh. I could, but there’s lots of things it’s more fun to do with other people anyway. So, if I’m not going to do something with someone else, I might as well read. ’S not a problem. This one’s actually pretty good.”
“What’s it about?”
“This girl in a coastal town—which I’m pretty sure is fabricated, unless there’s been a sudden increase of coastal towns in the last twenty years or something—is having like, at least a thousand existential crises and nightmares and stuff, and based on the back cover, I think that what’s going on is that she’s actually a fallen angel but somehow forgot that she was, which is definitely not how it works, but hey, contrived fiction.
“So you see, this girl, she definitely feels like she has some issues from her past but she thinks she’s only twenty years old and not like, over six thousand, but I think one of her friends knows the truth, and is maybe trying to manipulate her?”
“I thought you said it was an adventure book,” Yenatru says.
“Well, I think it’s setting her up to join a crew of pirates.”
Yenatru raises his eyebrows. “How does that connect?”
“That’s what I was reading to find out,” Lucifer says with a grin. “Definitely my kind of book. I mean, probably. It could go wrong in a few different ways, like if the author thinks this mess is some kind of punishment for her falling… ugh. But I think it’s just a cool story about some amnesiac Fallen pirate bucking an abusive friend. Or something. But, obviously, I can read more of that on my own. I was really reading while waiting, anyways. You know, to find out what happens.”
“Not what happens in the book,” Yenatru says.
“Not what happens in the book,” she agrees, “what happens in life. Because, you know, it is a lot more interesting to do things when I’m not on my own.”
Yenatru blinks. “You are not saying—”
“That I was waiting for you?” She grins. “Well, not entirely—there was the chance I’d meet someone else too. But I figured you’d come back.”
Lucifer takes this moment to slide her legs off the top of the bookshelf and climbs down it, using each shelf as a foothold. She turns to face Yenatru, giving a slight toss of her head. Then she stops smiling, her face growing more serious.
“Yenatru,” she says, “it is a terrible thing to force someone to be a friend. And I want to be absolutely certain I don’t end up doing that. It is hard,” she gestures to emphasize the word, “to connect with people, to make friends, especially when you’re like me and it feels like all you humans are on such a fast time scale, like I have to act really quickly before you die. But I’ve done it wrong before, I’ve done it really wrong. I don’t want anyone beholden to me. And I really don’t want to be the center of anyone’s world. I just want to spend some time not being alone.”
Whoah.
That… was intense. That’s a lot for some woman Yenatru’s just met, Lucifer or no, to tell him.
But somehow… it almost makes him smile. Because emotions like that? They make her seem real. Even if he does have to wet his lips and taste the sweetness his Theurgy has formed there to find the strength to talk.
Avoiding the more important topic at hand, he manages to ask, “Aren’t there other Fallen?”
Lucifer laughs voicelessly. “The Fallen. Now they actually want me to be… unnecessarily important. A lot of them think of me as a hero, and fuck, they want me to be some kind of celebrity, important philosophical leader, whatever.” She rolls her eyes. “I gave up trying to deal with them a while ago.”
Yenatru struggles to find something of substance to say, and fails. But he wants to say something. Anything.
“I can see how they would,” he says. “You are the first to fall—”
“Someone else would have been the first even if I didn’t ever fall. Like Asmodeus, or Be’el. But…” her left hand briefly tightens into a fist. “With so many of the fucking Fallen, it’s almost like they think I fell for them. ‘Showed them the way’ or some bullshit. They should know better. If they wanted to fall same as me, they should know it’s not about other people.” She shakes her head. “Sorry.”
“I should be sorry. You’ve probably had this conversation a million times before.”
Lucifer chokes out a laugh. “Well. There’s some truth to that.”
There’s a pause in the conversation; Lucifer looks to the side, and Yenatru looks to the ground.
Then Lucifer gives a long sigh. “Fuck me though, I mean, don’t literally, but.” She sighs again. “I’m really shit at this. You’d think living a long time would get you some skills, but sometimes, it really doesn’t. Or not much. I just wish I could—not have there be a power imbalance, even a perceived one. But I see it in you, I look like an authority to you, I look somehow better.”
“Actually… I think you’re wrong about that.”
Lucifer raises her eyebrows. Her eyes almost sparkle with hope. God, she almost looks pitiable.
Yenatru’s eyes dart as he tries to work out how to say this. But then, maybe it doesn’t matter. Maybe the important part is to just say it. “So what you’re seeing… I think, what you’re seeing of me, me being scared, that’s… not as much because you’re Lucifer as it is because, well. You’re talking to me. You’re anyone at all, and you’re talking to me.”
Lucifer tilts her head, a slight smile hitting the corner of her mouth.
“I’m kind of pathetic,” Yenatru sums up.
Lucifer shakes her head. “Have you heard anything I’ve said? I’m kind of pathetic. I mean, I like myself and all,” she suddenly smiles, a Theurgist’s smile. “I like myself a lot. But wow, are there times.”
“I can’t even handle the idea that anyone might actually want to talk to me! You’re… probably less pathetic than that.”
Lucifer laughs. “Oh, we’ll see.”
Yenatru looks away, letting his gaze fall on the bottom rows of the bookshelf to his left. He’s still not sure how to process any of this. A person… a person talking to him… a Lucifer talking to him. It’s a lot.
“Very interesting books over there,” she comments. “I’m pretty sure they’re on the illustrious subject of mapmaking.”
“Maps are cool,” Yenatru says, then realizes the lack of enthusiasm in his voice and looks Lucifer back in the eye. “No, really, they are. There’s a lot of effort that goes into them! To get things the right distance, and then have it be pretty on top of that…” he shrugs. “I like maps. Took a class on them once.”
“Oh, so that’s why you found the bench in this section.”
“It doesn’t make for a great story, but yes.”
“Ah, the general program. Providing students with boring reasons to find hiding places since—when was it established?”
“Uh… maybe in the 5600s?”
“By Ēnnuh standards, I don’t even know if that’s recent or not. Hey, you’re from here, you tell me.”
Yenatru purses his mouth, thinking. “No, yeah, I’d say two hundred-some years ago is pretty old even for this city.”
“Aww. But hey, you didn’t deny that this is a hiding place for you, meaning you didn’t deny that you’re hiding, meaning I get to tease you about keeping your Theurgy secret again.”
Yenatru flushes a little. “Are you really sure it means that?”
Lucifer puts her hand to her chin and strokes a beard she doesn’t have. “Well, it is true I don’t want to be too much of a jerk.”
Yenatru exhales. “Oh thank God.”
“But it’s also true,” she continues, “that hiding like this is absolutely setting yourself up for teasing, so this is a completely natural result of your decision, and I claim no responsibility.” She puts her hands up in mock surrender and smiles.
“That’s not logic…”
“Fight me, boy.”
“With what?” Yenatru says, a little shrill, gesturing at the complete lack of weaponry. “A book?”
“I… was going to say with your words. But books are kind of like words, so that could work too.”
“But why are we fighting?” His eyes are wide.
“I was trying to banter.”
“…Oh.” Yenatru blushes. “I’m really not very good at this, am I? Are you sure you want to be trying to talk to me?”
“Yeah,” she says. “I’m sure.”
“What is even happening in my life right now…” Yenatru mutters.
“Well,” she says, sounding perfectly happy to explain this, “you ran into me, and I’m talking to you, trying to figure out how to be friends, if you do want to be friends. Also, I’m not doing a very good job.”
“Most people think of you as somewhat dignified,” Yenatru points out. “Someone with pride. Impressive.”
Lucifer clutches a hand to her chest. “Ow, don’t go implying I don’t have pride. I like being prideful! ’S fun.”
“You are attempting and failing to banter with some really shy boy you met in a university library.”
“I did say I was pathetic.” She smiles. “Do you believe me now?”
Yenatru thinks about that for a moment, then nods. “Yes. Yes, I believe you.”
Lucifer’s smile turns harder, almost determined. “Good.”
Of course, Yenatru can’t help but think, she did say she was prideful and then all of five seconds later call herself pathetic. He’s pretty sure that’s not what pride means.
She leans against the bookcase, shifting some books behind her. “So, how’s your Theurgy going?”
“I haven’t had a chance to work on it today.”
“Now that I claim responsibility for,” She leans harder against the bookshelf. A book falls down behind her, though she doesn’t seem to notice. “You know, you could head to your bench. Or, if you did want to take me up on…”
Yenatru blushes. “U-um, I don’t think that’s necessary. Any mentorship, that is. Especially since you seem so worried about power imbalances…”
“Wait, are you trying to soothe my anxieties?” Lucifer asks.
“Yes?”
She laughs to herself. “Here you are, so worried yourself, and you’re trying to soothe me. That’s… that’s really nice, actually. Thank you.”
Yenatru looks to the ground. Thank you? He doesn’t know how to respond to that. How even do people respond to these things?
“Although the question does stand,” Lucifer says. “If you’d like to just go work on your Theurgy now? I really don’t want to keep you.”
“But… I’m talking to you.”
“You could stop talking to me.”
“But then… I might not talk to you again?”
“Because you don’t wanna?” she asks.
“More because you’ll probably leave.”
Lucifer sighs and shakes her head. “No, I won’t. I’ll be around. Seriously. There’s this book about an amnesiac Fallen possibly becoming a pirate. And the author has more books.”
“Okay.”
“What I’m trying to say is, I freaking love having friends, and so yes, that’s important, I could talk all night. But also, I don’t actually have a life, and you do, so… it’s your decision whether you want to talk. Whether you want to hang out, or whatever. Plus, that book actually is a lot of fun, so seriously, I’m not going to be offended if you leave to work on something important to you.”
“You’re honest and strange.” Flames, he hadn’t meant to say that, oh no, what if he offended her?
Lucifer’s eyes are glinting.
“Sorry,” he says.
“Oh no, don’t be!” She jumps up from her leaning position. “Seriously. Really. Whatever other adverb you like.”
Yenatru blinks, looking at her. He isn’t sure if he trusts himself to say anything, though she doesn’t seem to mind the things he says. Her smile reaches her eyes; her posture’s oriented toward him, as if she’d walk closer if he gave permission. Maybe that’s some kind of clue to what kind of person she is.
“Do I need to list more adverbs?” she asks.
“N-no.”
“But you’re thinking something that you’re not saying.”
Only that she’s the strangest person he’s ever met. Only that some part of him is strangely grateful about how much attention she seems to put on his needs. Only that, despite that, he still doesn’t know how to process half of what she’s said. Only that, despite that, he’s kind of glad someone seems to really not want him to lie or hide. Only that he still, still, has no idea why she’s even talking to him.
“Yenatruuuu,” she whines.
“Uh,” he says. “So maybe… this thing about being friends…”
Lucifer looks at him expectantly.
“…Maybe that would be really interesting.”
Lucifer starts to grin, then seems to take sudden control of her face. “I like that. Although we did just meet today, and please remember, meeting someone in a library isn’t a binding contract. Any time you don’t want to deal with me anymore, you don’t have to.”
Yenatru nods. “That’s good to know, in a way, although I don’t know if I’ll take you up on that. On not dealing with you, I mean.”
“That’s the point.” She tosses her head. “You don’t know.”
Yenatru smiles. “I think I will work on my Theurgy then, even though I did sort of come here to find you.” He closes his mouth quickly; he didn’t mean to say that.
Lucifer laughs. “No use getting too tired out by me. Or in getting too behind in manifesting your soul in the world.”
Yenatru’s smile widens and he finds himself looking to the side. “Yes.”
“You really do care about it,” she mutters with a smile. “Well, go then! Go find your bench or whatever.”
Yenatru nods with some degree of energy, then heads off to his usual place. But still, he can’t help but look back at Lucifer, already climbing back up the bookshelf. Somehow, he can’t help but smile.