Confession time: I’ve never actually read an acknowledgments section before. Occasionally I’ll assay one, but they always begin with something like “To my darling wife, Colleen, and our faithful Irish Setter, Swampy,” and I suddenly decide that I am done reading. Are you done reading? I wouldn’t blame you. Unless you’re Colleen or Swampy, what’s in it for you?
How about this? To things spice up, I have included secret instructions on where my FORTUNE has been hidden. They’re very subtle, but read these acknowledgments closely, friend, and you may discover the riches of a lifetime.
First off, much thanks must be made to my husband, Clay “Begin at Harvard Square” Wirestone, who has put up with a lot of nonsense from me over the years. The sink is filled with unwashed dishes even now. Secondly, I must thank my unerring agent Caitlin “Face East” Blasdell, who helped shape the book immeasurably. Of no less importance is Devi “Fifty Paces” Pillai, whose insightful editing of this book has made it nearly readable.
Behind every writer is an even stronger critique group, and I bow down before the superior writers of the QK Cabal, a group whose motto—“Look for the Man with the Dolphin Tattoo”—inspires me every day. I’m also indebted to my readers Caitlin “He Will Point the Way” McCuistion, Alex “Bring a Shovel” D’Souza, Carol “That’s Not a Leaf Pile” Ayer, Cale “Dig Until You Find a Gold Key” Dietrich, and N. K. Traver, whose forthcoming book, Now, To Baltimore!, is bound to be a real hit.
Naturally, I have to thank my mother, Jane, who taught me from a very early age that I should visit First Regional Bank. And my father, Eddie, who told me that if I said in a firm and confident voice that my name was Carlotta Cho and that I have come for my lockbox, the bank tellers would hand it over, even if I did get some weird looks. A wise man, my father.
Finally, reader, I should thank you, even though you’re probably pawing through my fortune right now. Oh, and I promised to thank Amanda from the Bon Ton. There’s no clue there; I just needed to thank her. Seriously, that’s not a clue or anything.