Introduction to Gross Jokes

You may not realize it, but the world is a pretty gross place. Just look around. There are slimy, moldy, creepy, crawly things everywhere— even on your own body! From dust mites and hair lice to fleas and bedbugs, there are little creatures hiding in the dark corners of your home all the time! And gross gook like mold, rust, grime, and pus can appear anywhere! There’s no escaping it—this stuff is always going to be a part of life. But gross things don’t have to be scary; learning about them can be fun and exciting. Making jokes about them is even better.

Not only are the things around us gross, but we’re pretty revolting ourselves. Our bodies do really nasty things on a daily basis, and if we’re not careful, we can easily offend others with bad smells, horrific sounds, and disgusting sights. We produce earwax, snot, phlegm, and sweat every day. We can’t avoid these things, so why not joke about them? This book will help you find the funny side of all the foul things around you. You’ll giggle with delight reading and reciting jokes about everything from cannibals and vampires to frogs in blenders and chickens that didn’t quite make it across the road. You can gross out your friends time and time again with jokes about slippery slime, curdled milk, sickening scabs, and gooey boogers. These are all important topics in the world of grossology— the study of grossness. By the time you’re done reading this book, you’ll be an expert in that field. If you love to burp, fart, pick scabs, and examine puppy puke, you’ll get endless enjoyment from this book.

Getting involved in the grosser side of life takes some time and effort, so be patient. To really live the gross lifestyle, you’ll have to memorize some of these grotesque jokes, pay careful attention to the freaky facts, and try every one of the gross recipes. Then you’ll have to share what you’ve learned with everyone from your best friend to your grandmother, even if you don’t think they’ll appreciate it. Remember, the only thing better than being gross is being funny and gross. Spread these spine-tingling, nauseating, nasty jokes to everyone you know. Before long, the whole neighborhood will be chuckling with disgust. So, enjoy these jokes, embrace the world of creepy crud, and go forth and spread the grossness.