Chapter 39
“A Streetcar Named . . .”
The couple spent the entire day together, going from store to store, looking for a dress to wear to the funeral. Johnnie found a black dress, a hat with a veil, black shoes, a black pearl necklace, and a black purse. Lucas, like most men who shopped with women, was bored and frustrated by the endless shopping, and the New Orleans heat made him even more impatient. Johnnie, however, had no idea how frustrated he was because Lucas never let her see it. He was her friend and she needed him.
When they finished shopping, they ate lunch and drank ice cold lemonade in Jackson Square. Johnnie and Lucas were eating Po boy sandwiches they had purchased from Mr. Big Stuff’s restaurant. Johnnie told Lucas her plan to get her brother to let her stay in New Orleans.
Lucas didn’t want her to leave any more than she did. Although he thought her plan would work, the possibility of it not working and losing her terrified him. He had fallen hard for Johnnie, and believed she had sincere feelings for him too.
It was dark now. The muggy heat felt like a ball and chain they had to carry from place to place. Having been scorched all day, they decided to go to an air-conditioned theater to get out of the sweltering heat. They didn’t care what movie was playing. They just wanted to enjoy the cool air, if only for a couple of hours. A Street Car Named Desire was being shown at a local theatre.
While the movie played, Lucas found himself thinking intensely about Johnnie’s success, which troubled him. I don’t even have a job and Johnnie already has her own house. She even has stocks and shit. And she’s got plenty of money. She even bought me a new suit. She paid for the movie tickets, the popcorn, and the soda. How am I going to keep her happy without any money? Earl buys her everything. What can I buy her that she doesn’t already have? Nothing! Instead, I’m stealing roses from the Quarter to give to her. I’ve got to do something to impress her. I gotta get a job or she’ll never leave that cracker!
Johnnie was deeply engrossed in the film version of the Tennessee Williams play. The Blanche Dubois character, brilliantly brought to life by Vivien Leigh, mesmerized her. It was like watching her future being portrayed for all to see. She understood Blanche Dubois because in many ways, their lives were mirror images of each other. Both women started their lives one way and ended up another. Both women possessed haughty ideas about themselves and were brought down to a baseness that was uncharacteristic of how they saw themselves. Both women had to lie to themselves to keep at least a measure of respectability.
Johnnie wondered if she too would end up like Blanche Dubois, a used-up woman whose beauty was fading to black, after opening many doors that were now closed; a woman who had it all and lost it; a woman who was desperate to find somebody, anybody to accept and take care of her despite her depraved past. Blanche’s tragic end was a malignant insanity, brought about by a self-righteousness that turned her world of base sexual activity into a magical kingdom, complete with a straight-jacket and a rubber room. As the credits rolled, a river of tears ran down Johnnie’s face. She wiped her eyes with the napkins she picked up at the popcorn and soda stand.
They walked to the car quietly, both of them in deep thought. Johnnie was still comparing her life to that of Blanche Dubois and even her mother’s, wondering if she, too, would end up dead in this dog eat dog world. She felt insecure for the first time in a while. With her mother gone, all she had left was Earl, the man who started her on the path she was on, and Lucas, who was so smitten with her he accepted her as she was. Johnnie decided she would hold on to Lucas for as long as he wanted her.