Chapter 66
“You love me that much?”
It was dark outside and only a few guests remained. Lucas was sitting dutifully with Johnnie, but he couldn’t stop thinking about what Marla had said about Napoleon. They were sitting under that same tree where Marla had approached Lucas. Except for the couple of hours she spent talking to her father, guests surrounded Johnnie the entire day, seeing to her wants and needs. And now, she wanted to tell Lucas what she and her father talked about.
“My father pretty much confirmed everything that Benny told me about my mother and Sheriff Tate,” Johnnie was saying, but Lucas was somewhere else. “He told me he wanted . . .”
A few days ago, Marla told me that I can’t trust Napoleon and that he doesn’t have any friends. Now she’s telling me he’s got designs on Johnnie. Hmmm . . . he was kinda goin’ outta his way to get in her good graces on amateur night. Is he really that eager to help us make Richard Goode pay for what he did to Johnnie’s mother, or is he doing all of this because he wants my girl? But he had already promised to help me before he even met Johnnie. And he knew about Johnnie’s mother being killed before I told him. Said he read it in the paper. Hmmm . . . I wonder.
Now Marla, she’s a real sly one. She’s trying to get me to see her again, and it doesn’t even matter that we’re at my girl’s mother’s funeral. Who the hell am I kiddin’? Yeah, she was tempting me here, but I had already made up my mind to fuck her before she even said anything. And what about Napoleon? Has he done anything but the right thing by me? I’m the one in the wrong. I wanna screw Marla, so do I wanna believe that if he wants to screw Johnnie, I’m justified?
Besides, what about her and Earl? I told her I don’t like that shit. But does she stop? Hell naw! Trust me, she says. But I do love Johnnie. What’s it going to hurt if I get a little from Marla? I mean, it’s just one time. Hell, I didn’t even stick it in last time. But she wants me to dip it. Shit! Who am I foolin’? I wanna dip it. I mean, she did say I could learn from an older woman. If I did it with her, it could make sex with Johnnie better.
Yeah, but what if we get caught? I’m a dead man. Maybe that’s what Bubbles was sayin’ without really sayin’ anything at all. Fuck it! A piece of pussy ain’t worth all that. I ain’t gon’ get killed over no pussy! Fuck that!
“What’s on your mind, Lucas?” Johnnie asked.
“Huh?” Lucas said with a confused, vacant look on his face.
“I’ve been talking to you for about ten minutes.” Johnnie frowned. “Are you even listening to me?”
“Yeah, you were tellin’ me about the conversation you were havin’ with your father.”
Johnnie rolled her eyes. “You were not listening to me. You know it and I know it. Now, do you want to tell me what’s on your mind? It’s gotta be more interesting than what I’m telling you. You still worried you gon’ lose me?”
Seeing a convenient way out of having to tell her what he was wrestling with—the enormous temptation of being with Marla, the dilemma of wondering if Napoleon wanted her and if Bubbles knew about it—he simply said, “Yes.”
“Why can’t you trust me, Lucas?” Johnnie asked. “I keep telling you that it’s you I want to be with.”
“Yeah, that’s what you say,” he said.
“You know, I can’t believe you would do this today of all days. Why can’t you just support me today, huh?”
“I’m here, ain’t I? What more do you want?”
“I want your undivided attention when I’m talking to you, Lucas. Is that too much to ask?”
“Is it too much to ask to have the same freedom you have with Earl?”
Now Johnnie understood. She saw him talking to Marla from her bedroom window when she was pointing him out to her father. Talking to her seemed innocent enough, but Johnnie remembered the way they looked at each other at the funeral when they thought no one was paying attention. They were obviously attracted to each other, but Johnnie wasn’t concerned about it until now.
“So, you want her?” Johnnie asked without malice.
Surprised that she would ask the question, Lucas frowned and tried to pretend he didn’t know what she was referring to. “Who you talkin’ about, Johnnie?”
She stared at him for about thirty seconds, narrowing her eyes and curling her lips the entire time. As she looked at him, the words of her mother echoed in her mind.
All men are like that. They all want what you got between your legs. Well, I see that she was right about Lucas too. But do I hold his weakness against him? He’s been my only friend through all of this. I’ve asked a lot of him, and he said he would trust me. I guess I have to trust him now.
“Why you starin’ at me like that?” Lucas asked innocently.
Johnnie chuckled and forced a wry smile. “I’m not stupid, Lucas.”
“I know that, Johnnie.”
“Are you?”
“Am I what?” He frowned.
“Stupid.” Johnnie paused for a moment. “Lucas, that’s a white woman. And on top of that, she’s married to a gangster who we know has no problem killing people. Is it worth dying over?”
Realizing he was caught before he even did anything with Marla, he just sat there shaking his head. Damn, if Johnnie figured the shit out so quickly, I know for sure now that Bubbles was telling me he knew too. Is he going to tell Napoleon? Shit, I’m fucked and I didn’t even do anything yet.
“Well, is it?” Johnnie repeated. “Is it worth dying for?”
“No,” he admitted.
“Now look, Lucas, if you feel it necessary to see other women, I’m not going to say anything. I don’t like it, but what can I say at this point? Just don’t be stupid about it. A white woman is instant death if you get caught.” Then she seemed to have an afterthought. “Well, I guess about the only place in town that’s safe is the Savoy Hotel. But you gotta realize that if Napoleon finds out about it, he’ll kill you. And where’s that going to leave me? I can’t imagine going through what I’m going through and still end up without you in my life. I’ve already lost a mother, a father, and a brother. I couldn’t bear to lose you too, Lucas. Just promise me you’ll be careful, okay?”
“Johnnie, you’ve still got your father and your brother, and I promise you won’t lose me.”
“That’s what I’ve been telling you. My father and his wife want me to move to East St. Louis, and my brother and his wife want me to move to San Francisco. But I want to stay here with you.”
“Oh come on, Johnnie. Who you kiddin’?” he asked, shaking his head. “You have strong feelings for me. That I don’t doubt. But the truth is you wanna keep what you’ve got going with Earl until you’ve completed your plan. If it wasn’t for that, I’m sure you’d go with either your brother or your father.”
Johnnie smiled. “Well, that’s probably true, but I would want you to come with me.”
“You would, huh?”
“Yes, I would.”
“You love me that much?” he asked her.
“Yes, I do,” Johnnie answered convincingly. “Just promise me this. If you gotta do somethin’ with that white woman, go to the Savoy. You’ll be safer there, okay?”
“Okay, but I won’t be doing anything with her.”