On Thursday afternoon, as she emerged from the choir room, Cassidy was surprised to see that Lane was waiting for her. At least she assumed that was what he was doing since he smiled and waved.
“Going home now?” he asked.
“Yeah,” she told him. “My car’s in the other parking lot.”
“Yeah, mine too. Mind if I walk with you?”
She laughed. “Of course not.”
“I just finished with soccer practice and thought you might be having choir practice.”
“Yeah, we’ve been practicing a lot lately. We have our jazz concert the week after homecoming.”
“Speaking of homecoming . . . I kinda wanted to talk to you about that,” he said quietly.
“Oh?” She glanced at him, noticing that he seemed rather glum. “Something wrong?”
“Sort of.”
Disappointment washed over her. Was he getting ready to break their date? Tell her he changed his mind, that it was a mistake, or maybe even that it was a bad joke? How mean would that be? Even as these thoughts tumbled through her head, she thought she probably deserved this. First of all, she was the one who’d been so negative about the DG. Then when she was the first one to land a date, she’d been so smug and full of herself. Well, fine, she deserved this. Hopefully he’d get it over with quickly. “What is it, Lane?” she demanded as they walked through the parking lot. “What’s up?”
His mouth twisted to one side. “Well, I know you girls have heard a little about the Worthington speech.”
“Uh-huh.” She barely nodded.
“Well, we might joke about it and stuff, but we do take it seriously. Not everyone, but a lot of us do. I mean, maybe the whole non-dating thing goes a little far, but there are other—”
“You know, I hadn’t really planned to date,” she said suddenly.
“Huh?”
“Before the, um—” She stopped herself from saying DG. “Before some of us girls got all into this homecoming dance, I was determined not to date.”
“Really?” He gave her a dubious look.
She held up her hand like a pledge. “Honestly. I even told my parents I wasn’t going to date until college.” Now she was embarrassed. Why was she going on like this? Why should he care? “But the girls were so gung-ho about this dance . . . I guess I kinda caved.” She made a nervous smile. “If you want to bow out of this dance, I’ll understand completely. No problem.”
He frowned. “You wouldn’t be mad?”
She firmly shook her head. “Well, to be honest, I’d be a little disappointed, but I would understand. It might just be for the best.” As she said this, she knew it was true. As much as she’d gotten caught up in the DG, she’d felt uneasy about it. There’d been lots of times when she’d considered putting on the brakes and leaping for safety. Maybe this was her chance.
His dark eyes twinkled as a smile crept onto his lips. “Well, that wasn’t what I was going to say, Cassidy. But it’s kind of good to hear that. I’m glad you’re not taking this date too seriously.”
Now she wasn’t sure whether to be relieved or insulted. What exactly was he saying, anyway?
“What I wanted to tell you is that some of the other guys are kinda concerned. We don’t want to fail Worthington’s challenge.”
“Oh . . . yeah, I get that.” She was standing by her car now, twisting the strap of her bag around and around. “Like I said, I’ll understand if you want to forget about going to homecoming with me. That’s fine.” Just get it over with, she was thinking impatiently. Come on!
“Kent and Harris were talking to me after soccer,” he continued in a rambling sort of way. “Kent is kind of into Abby, and I know he’s thinking about asking her to the dance, but he wants to make sure she knows he’s not looking for a girlfriend.” Lane sighed as if he was uncomfortable having this conversation. “That’s kind of how we all feel.”
Cassidy just laughed. “Well, don’t worry, Lane. I’m not looking for a boyfriend either. I just thought it would be fun to go to the dance.”
Once again he looked relieved. “That’s great.”
“I can’t speak for the other girls. But I think they were mostly wanting to go to the dance and have fun, you know? I don’t think anyone plans on getting really serious.”
“Cool. I’ll let the guys know.” He looked like he was about to leave.
“Do you think they’re going to ask the girls to the dance?” she asked before he could go.
He shrugged. “Maybe.”
After they said good-bye, she got into the car and immediately texted the rest of the DG with the good news. Although she couldn’t promise anything, she did want them to know that some progress was being made. She also wanted them to know that she’d had something to do with it. Especially Devon, since she sometimes acted like Cassidy was the DG freeloader.
As Cassidy drove home she felt torn. On one hand, she was glad that Lane hadn’t broken their date, but on the other hand, she was surprised at how she’d felt a smidgeon of relief to think it could be the end of the Dating Games. Where had that come from? Maybe she knew—maybe she’d just been pretending to be this oblivious. The truth was, Cassidy had been struggling with the spiritual part of her life lately. As badly as she wanted to be a strong Christian and to have an influence on her friends, it seemed she was handling everything completely backwards. Instead of loving her friends, she was often judging them or lecturing them. Just admitting this to herself right now felt lousy.
She thought back to last summer when she’d attended a leadership retreat with some of the youth group from her church. It had been an “invitation only” camp, and she’d felt truly honored to be chosen. The purpose of the camp had been to call the teens to a higher level of commitment. The main focus had been on getting to know God better in order to make God better known among their peers at school. But something they’d talked about a lot was developing their spiritual hearing. They’d been encouraged to tune in to God’s “still, small voice.” As Cassidy parked her car in the driveway, she felt like she was failing at that.
For starters, what if God had been telling her not to date, but she wasn’t listening? After all, Cassidy had given up on dating last year, and now she was in this stupid club. What if she’d allowed God’s still, small voice to be drowned out by the likes of Devon Fremont? Just the thought of this was extremely unsettling. It made Cassidy feel like a hypocrite. Not just for ignoring God but also for the way she’d put on the appearance of being so spiritual in front of her friends. What was wrong with her?
Her parents weren’t home yet or Cassidy might’ve asked her mom for some advice. Despite being a mom, she could dish out some pretty good counsel at times. Instead, Cassidy decided to call her favorite youth leader from church.
“I hope I’m not bothering you,” she told Julia, “but I need to talk to someone.”
“No problem,” Julia assured her. “What’s going on?”
Without divulging the Dating Games club, she explained how she and four friends were trying to get dates to go to the homecoming dance.
“Good for you,” Julia said cheerfully. “That sounds like fun.”
“Except that I’d kind of decided not to date,” Cassidy confessed. “I mean, last spring I read this book about how dating really messes some people up, so I thought I shouldn’t date.”
“Oh . . . ?”
“So now I’m feeling kinda guilty, you know? Like maybe I’ve blown it and I should just cancel my date to the dance.”
“Hmmm.”
“Do you think I should cancel?”
“Well, you said you decided not to date. Was God the reason you made that decision, Cass? Did you feel like it was something God had directed you to do?”
She thought about this. She wanted to be honest—with herself and Julia. And with God. “It didn’t really seem like God. Mostly it was because of the book I read. It just seemed like a good idea.” She sighed. “Maybe it was my way to have a good excuse for not dating—I mean, if I never got asked out.”
Julia chuckled.
“But it seemed sensible at the time, and I’d planned to stick with it.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Then I kinda let myself get pulled in with these girls, and the next thing I knew I was planning to go on this date.”
“Are these girls your friends?”
“Yeah, sure. For the most part. I mean, there’s one girl I don’t get along with that well, but I’m trying to be nice to her. She’s Emma’s friend and she used to go to church, but she’s changed a lot since those days. Still, I guess I was hoping I might be a witness to her. And to the others too.”
“Cassidy, that’s great!”
“Yeah . . . I guess so. But what about this whole dating thing? Do you think I’m blowing it by going on a date? Have I compromised?”
“I think you need to ask God those questions. For sure, if God tells you not to date, then you better listen and obey. But sometimes we run ahead of God and we start making up rules for ourselves. Rules that aren’t really from God. It’s almost like we think we can impress God, which is totally ridiculous. The next thing we know we’re caught up in legalism—you know, where you make a rule and think that God is going to be pleased with you for keeping it. That’s not how he works. That’s how religion works. But God doesn’t want us to be religious. He wants us to have a relationship with him. Not a bunch of rules.”
“Yeah. I get that.”
“It all comes back down to listening to him. Are you spending time with God? Reading your Bible and praying every day?”
“I’m trying to.”
“Good. That’s the best way to get God’s direction. Then you need to listen to your own heart too, Cassidy. Like how about the guy you’re going to the dance with—is he a good guy?”
“Yeah. Absolutely.” She even told Julia about how Lane was committed to the guys’ code of honor. “Some of the other guys are like that too.”
“That’s cool. I think it would be awesome for Christian kids to go on a group date to have a good time together. What a great example for others.”
“You think it’s okay then?”
Julia chuckled. “Sorry, Cass, that’s not how it works. You can’t call me and ask for my permission or my blessing and run off without thinking for yourself. I can give you advice, but you have to go to God for the specific answers. Listen to him and listen to your heart.”
Cassidy knew Julia was right, but it would be so much easier if she would just tell her what to do.
“Here’s another bit of advice,” Julia said. “When I’m asking God for direction in my own life, I do a peace inventory before I make a decision.”
“Piece of what?” Cassidy asked.
“You know, like the peace that passes understanding. The peace that rules in your heart when you’re right with God.”
“Oh, yeah.”
“If I don’t get a sense of peace about something I’m about to do, I take that as God telling me no, or that I need to wait. And believe me, I’ve ignored it a couple of times, and I’ve been pretty sorry later.”
“Yeah, I’m sure I’ve done that too.”
“Don’t forget that following God is a one day at a time thing, Cassidy. Just because God gives you a green light to go on this date doesn’t mean that he’s telling you to get into dating in a big way. Remember too that guys are part of the equation. Never go out with a guy you don’t trust—or one you don’t have peace about. To be honest, I can think of a lot of good reasons that some girls don’t date at all. For one thing, dating can really derail a relationship with God.”
“Okay, now you’re making me confused again.”
Julia laughed. “Sorry. Back to square one. It’s up to you to figure this stuff out. No one else can tell you what to do. Well, that is, unless your parents are opposed to dating. I know some girls with parents like that. And I respect them for it.”
“No, my parents are okay.”
“Well, I’m sure God will make it clear to you, Cassidy.”
“Right now it feels as clear as mud.”
Julia promised to pray for Cassidy and her friends as well. “Keep me posted on how it turns out,” she said before they hung up.
Cassidy put her phone away, then bowed her head. She was determined to do this God’s way.
“Please, God, show me what you want me to do in regard to dating,” she said slowly. “Help me to tune my ears to your still, small voice.” She sat quietly for a while, trying to listen. Soon she felt a nudge—not an answer to her prayer, but as if she should be praying for the other girls in the DG. Wanting to be obedient to that quiet voice, she began to pray for each of them—one by one and by name. As she prayed, she realized that she really cared about all of them. Even Devon. She even took time to pray for the guys that the girls were trying to entice as dates. She asked God to help them to keep their code of honor—even if it meant no one went to the dance in the end. Really, what did it matter if they all stayed home?
When she finally said amen, she realized she did have a sense of peace. The weird thing was that she felt that she would be at peace whether or not she went to the homecoming dance. Because now, more than ever, she felt a sense of mission—as if God was calling her to something more important than just going on a date and attending a dance. She wasn’t sure quite how she would do it, and she suspected she’d been going about everything all wrong previously—especially the way she’d treated her friends—but from here on out she wanted to do a better job of making God known to her friends. She knew that meant she would have to become a better friend first.