Emmie
The way he looked at me, the heat of his body and the touch of his hands, was enough to make me want to beg for more. I wanted to experience everything with him, wanted his lips on my body, his cock inside me. Even though I was a virgin, I’d read enough and watched some porn that I thought I was prepared for what would happen between us. When he cupped my breasts and took first one nipple, then the other into his mouth, sucking hard on the tips, then grazing them with his teeth, I shuddered and wished we had fewer clothes between us.
I wanted to see him, to explore every inch of his body. The thought of exposing myself like this to someone had always frightened me, but not with Zach. With him, this just felt incredibly right. I remembered my mother once telling me that when you met your soulmate it was something you just knew. She’d had a wistful look on her face, and I’d thought at the time she was speaking of my father. As I got older, I realized that she could have never loved my dad and had probably been in love with another man at some point. I didn’t want to be like her, look back and realize I’d missed out on something great because I was too scared.
He rocked his hips against me and I felt the ridge of his cock. He felt huge and I worried a little that he’d be too big for me, but I trusted him not to do anything that would hurt me. He might be this big brute of a guy, and he claimed to have a violent side, but with me he’d been sweet and gentle. Even now, he kept his touch light enough that he wouldn’t bruise me. From what I’d learned from my roommates at college, most guys didn’t think about much other than themselves. At least the boys at school were that way. Maybe one day they’d become men like the one sending waves of pleasure through me.
“Zach,” I murmured, holding him to me as he sucked at my nipple again.
I squirmed, wanting more but not knowing if I should ask. Would he think badly of me if I said wanted things to go further? He said we were strangers, and we were, but he didn’t feel like a stranger. When he held me, it felt like I’d come home for the first time in my life, like I was exactly where I was supposed to be. I didn’t think he wanted to hear that. Men didn’t like crap like that, did they?
“Please,” I begged. “Zach, I… I need…”
He nuzzled my neck, then licked at my jaw before kissing me. “What do you need?”
“More. I need more.”
Heat flared in his eyes and he tapped my thigh. I stood on shaky legs and Zach slowly reached for my pants, pausing with his fingers over the button. I gave him a nod and he unfastened my jeans and pushed them down my legs. I stepped out of them and he groaned as he stared at my plain panties. Lightly, he ran his fingers across the front of them before giving them a tug. They fell to the floor and I stood before him completely exposed. He licked his lips as he stared at my pussy.
“You shave the hair off?” he asked, his voice rougher than before.
“One of the girls at college talked me into going with her for a wax. I liked the way it felt afterward, so I kept going back,” I said. “Is that a good thing?”
“Really fucking good. I’ve heard it makes things more pleasurable for you.”
“Zach.”
His gaze caught mine and he gripped my waist, then lifted me onto the table in front of him. He pushed my legs wide and I could feel myself opening to him. He groaned and stared before running his fingers down my slit.
“So fucking wet,” he said. “You ever played with yourself or used toys?”
My cheeks warmed. “No. At home I was too scared to try something like that, and at college I was never alone.”
“You’ve never had an orgasm, even by your own hand?” he asked.
“No.”
“Christ, Emmie.” His eyes slid shut and his jaw went tight. “The things I want to do to you. You should tell me no, put your clothes on, and get the hell out of the kitchen. Go lock yourself in the bedroom or something.”
“What if that’s not what I want? What if I want you to do all those things to me?” I asked.
“You don’t know what you’re saying. If you could see the things I’m picturing, then you’d run.”
“Zach, I’m a virgin, not an idiot. I’ve watched porn and read erotic books. As long as you aren’t going to cause me pain, then I don’t care what you do to me. I don’t think BDSM would be my thing, but I trust you not to hurt me.”
He growled and stood so fast his chair tipped over. “You shouldn’t have said that, Emmie. I was holding on, barely, but I was managing. Giving me an open invitation wasn’t your wisest decision.”
I stared at him. “Maybe it’s exactly what I want. I’m probably the only twenty-one-year-old virgin at school. I want you, Zach. I trust you.”
He scooped me off the table and briskly walked to the bedroom. Zach eased me onto the bed, then shut and locked the bedroom door. I frowned and looked at it, wondering why we needed a locked door when it was just us in the house.
“I leave the front door unlocked in case anyone needs me,” he said. “But if anyone barged in here and saw you naked, I’d have to remove their eyes and beat the shit out of them.”
He quickly stripped off his clothes, and I eagerly scanned him from head to toe, taking in every inch of muscle and ink. I’d never thought of a man as beautiful before, but Zach’s body was a work of art. One that I wanted to trace with my fingers and tongue. His cock was hard and erect, and a little frightening with how big it was. He must have noticed me staring and gave it a stroke.
“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll go slow. You want me to stop at any point, just tell me. Might give me blue balls, but I’m not going to take something you aren’t offering. I’m an asshole, but I do understand the word no.”
He crawled over me on the bed, caging me between his thighs and arms. Pre-cum dripped from his cock onto me and I had the urge to taste him. The way he watched me, I felt like prey. He was an intimidating man, all controlled power in a deadly package, but I’d never wanted anyone more in my life, and I didn’t think I ever would.
“When you look at me like that, I feel like I can take on the world,” he said. “I would gladly slay dragons for you, Emmie. Or Spanish mobsters.”
I smiled a little. “Leave the poor dragons alone.”
“But the mobsters are fair game?” he asked.
“Oh, yeah. Those you’re allowed to slay. Even if I am related to one of them.”
He kissed me, his lips firm but not forceful. His tongue stroked mine and my belly tightened as my pussy got wetter. Zach took his time, almost as if he were savoring me. My lips tingled when he started kissing a path down my body, stopping to pay attention to my breasts. He seemed fascinated with them, and for the first time, I didn’t hate my body quite as much as I usually did.
When his shoulders spread my thighs wider, I gasped and bit back a moan. His beard tickled as he rubbed the inside of my leg before focusing on my pussy. He licked and sucked, making me feel things I’d never felt before. My body was tightening and getting hot. As his tongue flicked against my clit, it felt like my entire world shattered and I screamed out his name, my body bowing off the bed as the most intense sensations I’d ever felt rolled over me. He kept licking and teasing. One orgasm quickly turned into two and silent tears slipped down my cheeks from the force of my release. It left me shaken and blinking to clear the stars from my vision.
“Fuck, baby. I’ve never had someone come that damn hard so fast before,” he said, settling over me again.
“Is that a bad thing?” I asked, swallowing hard.
“No. It’s fucking perfect. You’re perfect.”
“Don’t make me wait anymore. Make me yours,” I said. “Show me what I’ve been missing.”
He reached between our bodies and slowly sank a finger inside me. “So damn tight, baby. Let me stretch you a little or it’s going to hurt like a bitch.”
He stroked first one finger in and out, then a second. It burned a bit, and when he added a third finger it pinched. His thumb swiped over my clit, causing a spark of pleasure. He did it again and again, and soon his thrusting fingers weren’t nearly enough. I could feel something building again. He twisted his fingers on the next stroke and I came.
Zach eased his fingers from me and I widened my legs, wrapping them around his hips. I felt his cock press against me, the head stretching me as he sank into me. Sweat beaded his brow and his jaw was tight. He didn’t rush, pushing in one inch at a time, pausing if I gave any indication it hurt.
“Just do it. Get the painful part out of the way,” I said.
“Emmie…”
“Do it,” I said, gritting my teeth to prepare myself.
He hesitated only a moment, then thrust hard and deep. I sucked in a shocked breath and felt my eyes go wide. It felt a little like I’d been split in two, but Zach held completely still, his muscles straining. After a moment, the pain faded. If he hadn’t been so huge, I didn’t think it would have been all that bad. Zach was definitely big all over.
“I’m okay,” I assured him. “You can move.”
His gaze held steady on mine as he pulled back, then pushed inside. It was slightly uncomfortable for the first few strokes, and then that warm tingling started again. Soon I was begging him to go faster, harder. The headboard slammed into the wall with every thrust. He kissed me, thoroughly, as he drove into me again and again. I came apart, clenching around his cock as the breath was nearly stolen from my lungs, the world falling away. I felt the warm splash of his cum inside me. When he stilled, buried deep, I wished we could stay like that forever.
“Are you okay? I wasn’t too rough?” he asked.
“It was perfect,” I assured him.
He glanced up at the headboard and a weird look crossed his face. I craned my neck and couldn’t stop the laughter that bubbled inside me as I saw the crack in the wall behind the bed. I’d heard people comment about breaking a bed during sex, but I’d never heard of someone breaking a wall. Maybe we’d set a new record.
As he pulled out, he looked down between my legs and cursed.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, leaning up on my elbows.
“I forgot protection,” he said. “I never fucking forget.”
It felt like a weight settled in the pit of my stomach. Was he upset because he didn’t want kids, or was he upset for some other reason? I hadn’t really thought about protection either, but he’d said he wanted to keep me. If that were true, then kids would eventually happen, right?
Zach got up and went to the bathroom. I heard the water running and tried to swallow the knot in my throat. Maybe it hadn’t been as perfect as I’d thought. I started to get up and grab my clothes, but he returned with a rag in his hands, his brow furrowed when he saw me.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
“I thought…” I looked away.
Zach came closer and knelt at the side of the bed, his hand on my thigh, and then he gently cleaned me. My pussy was sore and it stung a little as the warm, wet cloth swiped against me.
“You thought what?” he prodded.
“I thought you were mad and wouldn’t want me in your bed anymore.”
He reached up and cupped my cheek. “I’m not mad, baby. Not at you anyway. I’m upset that I didn’t think to protect you against pregnancy. We haven’t even discussed anything like that. I know some of the guys in my club got their women pregnant on purpose, but I would never do that to you.”
“It wasn’t because you don’t want kids with me?” I asked.
“No, sweetheart, but I think it’s too soon for either of us to be thinking about a family. We have plenty of time for that.”
My hand splayed across my belly. “What if I’m already pregnant? Since I wasn’t sexually active, I’m not on birth control.”
“Then I hope we have a little girl as pretty as her momma,” he said softly, giving me a smile.
He tossed the rag into the bathroom and I heard it hit the floor, then he nudged me farther onto the bed. Zach stretched out next to me and pulled me against his chest, cocooning me in his embrace.
“I promised to take care of you,” he said. “Using a condom would have been a good step toward that. I can’t change it now, and I can’t say I’m all that sorry. I loved feeling you, all of you. I’ve never gone bare inside a woman before. And just so you know, I get tested regularly. I haven’t been with anyone since my last test and I’m clean.”
I snorted. “Obviously I am too since I’d never even kissed someone before you.”
He pressed his lips to my forehead. “And you have no idea how happy that makes me, to be your first for everything. You’ve given me a gift I will always cherish, Emmie. Even if you decided to walk out of here tomorrow, I’d always remember this moment.”
I lifted my head and looked at him. “You’d let me leave?”
He arched a brow.
“Yeah, I didn’t think so,” I said. “You don’t seem like the type to give up something you want.”
“I’d let you go. Give you a head start; then I’d come after you. By the time I was done, you’d never want to leave again.”
I smiled. Maybe I should have been scared or creeped out, but it made me feel warm and tingly that he wanted me to stay. I had a feeling I was already losing my heart to him. I only hoped that one day he’d give me his too.
Pressed against his side, his fingers toying with my hair, I felt more content than I’d ever been. Being with Zach felt right on so many levels. Even if my sister wasn’t happy about it, and I still had the dark cloud of my father and Ernesto hanging over me, in this one moment I was truly happy. I knew it wouldn’t last, but I wanted to bask in the afterglow a little longer. I’d heard so many stories of how my friends at college had hated their first time. It had hurt, but once the pain had faded, it been an earth-shattering experience, one I would remember the rest of my life.
Someone pounded on the bedroom door, making Zach curse and get out of bed. He pulled his jeans on, then tossed his shirt to me. Once I was covered, he opened the door and glowered at a ginger-haired man on the other side.
“What the fuck, Wire? There’s such a thing as a damn phone.”
The man glanced at me before focusing on Tank again. “There are some things you need to know, especially since it looks like you slept with her already. Maybe we should step out of the room.”
“Is this about Emmie?” he asked.
“Yes, but I don’t think she needs to hear this. The news isn’t good, Tank. Hear what I have to say, then if you want her to know everything, you can tell her.”
Tank looked at me, his gaze assessing.
“It’s okay,” I said. “Go see what he found out. I trust you.”
He left Wire standing in the doorway and sat next to me on the bed. Tank pushed my hair back behind my ear, then kissed me softly. The look in his eyes was tender and he gave me a slight smile before he got back up. He opened a dresser drawer and pulled on a fresh shirt, then followed Wire out of the room, pulling the door shut behind him.
I leaned back against the headboard and stared at the opposite wall. I didn’t know what Wire had found that he thought might upset me, but I knew it had to be pretty bad. I already knew who my father really was, and I had no doubt that Ernesto was just as evil. Did they have a plan for me that I hadn’t heard that day? Something other than a marriage? I’d thought having to live with that man, having to sleep with him, would be the worst thing I could ever live through. Now I had to wonder if my worst fears were more like a vacation compared to what the two of them had in store for me.
Lupita had believed that the Dixie Reapers could protect me, that Tank could. But she’d mentioned someone else. Casper VanHorne. Was he the key to everything? I wasn’t familiar with the name, but if Lupita knew of him, and if he could handle my father, then it meant he wasn’t a man to be trifled with. I didn’t understand his connection to the Dixie Reapers, or why he’d help me. Maybe I should have asked more questions, or at least paid more attention to what happened around me before I’d left Spain.
My virginity had been important to Ernesto. That part had been clear in his comments at the diner. Was it just that he wanted his wife to be untouched? Or was it something more? Possibly something sinister? A shiver raked my spine as I thought about the kind of pain I’d have felt at his hands during my first time. No matter what happened, I was glad that Tank had been my first.
I looked over at the door and hoped that whatever Wire had found wouldn’t change things with Tank. After what we’d shared, my heart would break if he tossed me out. He’d promised to protect me, and I hoped that he’d meant it, but what if Wire’s news made him reconsider? My hands twisted in the blankets and my stomach churned as I waited. Lupita would have charged in there and demanded to know what was going on. But I wasn’t Lupita.
I was just Emmie. Naive, timid Emmie who jumped at shadows.
I had a feeling that if I was going to survive whatever was heading my way that I would need more of a backbone. I hoped that deep down I had a lioness hiding inside me, but I worried I was more like a mouse.
Only time would tell.