What’s the most common lie a Welshman tells?
“I was only trying to help that sheep over the fence.”
What do you call a Welshman with lots of girlfriends?
A shepherd.
How does a Welshman find a sheep in tall grass?
Very satisfying.
Why do Welshmen wear button-fly jeans?
Because sheep can hear a zipper at 100 yards.
I asked my Welsh mate how many sexual partners he’d had. He started counting, but then fell asleep.
What’s the definition of safe sex in Wales?
Branding the sheep which kick.
Did you hear they’ve just discovered a new use for sheep in Wales?
Wool.
Did you hear about the new online dating site for Welshmen?
EweTube.
What do you call a Welshman with a sheep under each arm?
A pimp.
Have you heard about the Welsh Muslim festival? It’s called Ramalamb.
What do you call four sheep tied to a post in Wales?
A leisure centre.
Did you hear about the Welshman who thought he’d caught a nasty STD? It turns out he was just allergic to wool.
Although Sir Anthony Hopkins is Welsh, why has he never been accused of having sex with sheep?
It’s all down to the silence of the lambs.
Did you hear about the Welshman who bought his girlfriend a pen for her birthday, but she kept getting out?
Where else but Wales can you get sex, a nice warm jumper and a casserole – all from the same date?
Did you hear about the Welsh vicar who lives over a shop? They call him Evans Above.
A friend said to me: “I can never do the Welsh accent properly. Every time I try it, it sounds like Pakistani.” I said: “You’ll just have to try harder, Tariq.”