ALEC
I pressed Maddie against the shut door and buried my face into her neck. “Cupcake.”
While I had been desperately trying to keep up with the whole king of Redwood attitude that everyone expected from me, we had seven minutes until the bell for first period rang, and I was already exhausted with the whole charade.
Maddie tensed and squirmed in my arms, twisting toward me and shoving her hands into my chest. “What are you doing?!” she whisper-yelled, breathing quickly. “Get off me! I never want to see your ugly face again.”
I moved back, but I was still inches from her, posting my arms on the door behind her to trap her in. “Is that better?” I asked.
She stared up at me, her cheeks flushed and her nipples poking through her Redwood Academy hockey T-shirt, and she pursed her full lips. She glanced down between us, pressing her thighs together. “No. You’re still too close.”
I moved back another few inches, watching as she furrowed her brow, as if she hadn’t really wanted me to move back at all and she just wanted to be bratty for me this morning. But she didn’t say anything, so I stayed put.
“I need to get to class,” she finally said.
But I didn’t want her to go. Not now. Not when I could finally talk to her. Though … I didn’t know how to start. Will she think less of me? Will she laugh in my face too?
“Are you jealous?” I asked instead of telling her what I really wanted to.
“Jealous?!” she asked, eyes blazing. “Of who? Sandra? Tiffany? No.”
My lips curled into a smirk, and I hummed.
“What?! I’m not!” she cried. “Why would I be jealous? Because you flirt with them?”
“So, you’d be okay if I got back together with Sandra?”
Maddie wet her lips. “Stop it,” she said, voice hoarse.
“She’s been all over me lately.”
“Alec …”
“She even made a pass at me Fri—”
“Fine!” she shouted, throwing her hands into the air. “I’m jealous, but that doesn’t mean that I like you.” She was seething and pushed me back a few feet. “Is that what you wanted to hear, Alec? Huh?” She shoved me again. “Now, get away from me before I punch you in your nose this time.”
I smirked at her, my stomach light. Maddie’s jealous.
She rolled her eyes. “Enjoy your little ego boost while it lasts because nothing is going to happen between us.”
“Oh?” I asked, stepping closer to her again yet still keeping my distance. Because if she didn’t want it, then I wasn’t going to push her. But, man, I wanted to touch her again. I posted one arm on the wooden door behind her and trailed my nose up the column of her neck without touching her. “Is that right?”
“Yes,” she breathed, voice barely above a whisper. “That’s right.”
I hadn’t touched her yet, but she was squirming around, grinding her thighs together, and staring at my lips. She opened her mouth, then closed it, brow furrowing.
“If my brother finds out …” she whispered, reaching up to squeeze her nipple.
And, fuck, I nearly lost all control.
“Yeah, I know. I know,” I murmured, reaching underneath her skirt and dragging a finger across her soaked panties. “If Oliver finds out that his sister has moaned my name, he’d kill both of us. Wouldn’t he?”
“He will!”
“And how do you think he’d react if he knew how wet your panties were for me?”
Her breath caught, and she placed a hand on my chest, but didn’t push me away. I moved my fingers around her clit, rubbing the swollen bundle of nerves back and forth. She rested her head against my chest and whimpered.
“What if he found me playing with your pussy?”
When I slipped my fingers under her silky underwear, she moaned. “Alec …”
I moved my fingers faster, pushing her so close to the edge already. She scrunched my T-shirt up in her fist and bit back another moan. I was desperate for her to feel good because of me again.
“What about you coming on my fingers?”
Her entire body tensed, her legs shaking. She formed an O with her mouth and threw her head back, her skin tinting pink as she held back a loud moan for me. She stared up at me through hazy eyes, coming on my fingers.
Once she finally came down from her orgasm, she leaned against the door and blew out a breath. Her face contorted from one of pleasure to anger. And suddenly, she shoved me away again. “What’s going on with you? Why are you acting so weird?”
“What are you talking about?”
She threw her hands into the air. “First off, you never talk to me. Ever.” She crossed her arms and tilted her head, those blazing eyes suffocating me. “Second, we slept together on Friday night! Then, Oliver said that you weren’t at practice yesterday.”
“I wasn’t.”
“Why not?”
I shrugged. “Because I didn’t want to go.”
More like I couldn’t get myself to leave the hospital.
“What do you mean, you didn’t want to go? You have a game tonight, and if you don’t go to practice the day before, then you can’t play.”
“So what?” I asked, grabbing my backpack and turning toward the door. “I don’t care.”
Honestly, it didn’t really fucking matter anymore. If I had gone to practice, all the guys would have done was tease me about the girl who had fucking drugged and raped me. I hadn’t wanted to go. None of it fucking mattered, especially if that chick had gotten pregnant.
She snatched my shoulder and turned me around. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that I don’t care.”
“You love hockey.”
“Yeah, I do.”
She stared at me like I was completely insane. “Do you hear yourself right now?”
“Loud and clear,” I said.
She stepped closer and lowered her voice. “Is it because of what happened between us?”
I stared at her for a few quiet moments, looking from eye to eye. I had fucking asked her to talk, and now that she was here and asking me what was wrong, I didn’t want to tell her. I was stalling to get a few minutes alone with her to calm myself down.
Because I couldn’t stop thinking about her all night.
“No,” I whispered. “It’s not that.”
She arched a brow. “Then, what is it?”
God, she was too good for me. I had been nothing but a dickhead to her, sleeping around with Sandra just to get her jealous. She even thought that I had slept with someone else, and she was here, shouting at me for missing a game.
“It’s nothing,” I said, mouth dry. “Sorry.”
She froze, hurt crossing her face as the last word left my mouth. She dropped her gaze to the floor between us and chewed on the inside of her cheek. “What are you apologizing for? Wasting my time or sleeping with another girl?”
Fuck.
I closed my eyes, not wanting to think about it. But honestly, it was the only thing I had been thinking about this entire weekend. She just didn’t understand how much what happened affected me. How much it hurt me.
My chest tightened, the anxiety quickly building inside me.
I didn’t want her to see me like this.
I was toxic Alec Wolfe, not some weak idiot who broke out into panic attacks.
“Leave,” I said, ripping myself away from her.
“I’m not going anywhere,” she said stubbornly, walking around me so that she stood right in front of me again.
I averted my gaze to anywhere but her.
She placed both hands on her wide hips. “You’re the one who brought me here.”
“I brought you in here so I could fuck you,” I snapped, coming up with any type of excuse for her to leave. I could barely breathe and didn’t want her to see the hives on my neck. I clasped my hands together so they wouldn’t shake. “But you had to start bitching, so leave.”
Instead of stomping out of the room, Maddie stared up at me. I peered down at her, hoping that she’d hit me across the face again rather than be devastated at the words that had just left my stupid mouth. But tears were trembling in her big eyes.
She opened her mouth, lips twitching. “I … I hate you.”
“I’m sorry,” I said, grabbing her face with my shaky hands. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.”
“Yes, you did.”
“No, I didn’t. Please …” My heart was beating rapidly, only speeding up. “Maddie, don’t cry.”
Tears raced down her cheeks. “I hate you!” she sobbed, tearing herself away from me and running to the door. “I hate you so much, Alec Wolfe.”