If you don’t consciously prepare yourself each day to practice wonder and joy, you get really good at practicing stress and pain and anger and anxiety and fear… kids laugh 300 to 400 times a day. But grown-ups? Only about 15.
—SARANNE ROTHBERG, founder of Comedy Cures
Thoughts and emotions—your mental, psychological, emotional, and even spiritual state—can actually make your body more—or less—acidic. Similarly, what you eat can affect your thoughts, moods, and emotions. Eating the wrong kinds of foods can lead to depression—and overeating. Eat the right kinds of foods brings a feeling of overall well-being and even euphoria. This chapter is designed to help you make sure your mind works for you, not against you, when it comes to weight loss.
Behavior is complex, and so is changing it. There is no quick fix. But understanding how our thoughts and feelings in general, and about food in particular, influence us and our lifestyle choices is critical to not just getting to a healthy weight, but also staying there. You need an attitude that will help you on your way, as well as specific tools to help you move ahead positively.
THINK POSITIVE
For the body to stay in a healthy state of balance, including a healthy weight, you must find mental, emotional, and spiritual calm, as well as physical stability. Our thoughts and emotions can disturb the balance just as more obvious physical challenges can, leading to the excess acidity in the body at the root of excess weight. This book would be unfinished if we left it at “you are what you eat—and drink.” You are also what you think. Being stuck in negative thoughts and emotions will contribute to trapping you in an acidic, overweight body—you’re actually thinking yourself fat. Finding an emotional balance and a sense of spiritual connection, on the other hand, you can actually think yourself thin.
On a very basic level, uncontrolled negative thoughts and emotions often trigger unhealthy eating in a variety of forms, aimed at comforting and consoling oneself. We often overeat under stress, or eat when we’re nervous, or eat for a momentary good feeling, or eat because we are lonely, or eat to reward ourselves, or eat to fill a void, or eat to punish ourselves for being unhappy—and so on, and so on. And we may choose unhealthy foods because we are feeling generally negative, or because they remind us of happy childhood memories. Obviously, these eating binges, whatever their particulars, overtax the body, especially since they almost always entail sugar, carbs, and/or too much protein. Then, as we pack on more fat and/or unhealthy eating, our thoughts and feelings just go downhill, creating a vicious cycle. As you spiral around, you’re liable to just give up, to stop even trying to improve your health.
To change only your diet isn’t enough to achieve permanent weight loss and vibrant good health. You must also deal with any emotional issues and stresses by understanding and modifying your behavior. Leaving them out of control will undermine even the best of intentions about what you eat. We all need to find ways to think and feel differently, to use negative thoughts and emotions in constructive ways rather than wallowing in them, and we need to do that even when we are under stress.
I (Shelley) am certainly not advising you to not be emotional. That’s simply not humanly possible, anyway. Being human means having emotions. It’s not enough to tell yourself just to not think negatively, or to get over it or not be upset. That will never last, if it ever works. Just as the basic principles of diet and exercise need to be learned, understood, considered, accepted, and adopted, so too do you need to process your thoughts and emotions as well as your approach to them. That begins by recognizing that your emotions come from your thoughts, and those thoughts from your beliefs.
Our beliefs give rise to our thoughts and to our behavior. That is to say, our beliefs are the foundation upon which we build our very selves. Our worldview, our values and judgments, impact all of our decisions and the way we relate to others.
Our thoughts are our constant companions, so it’s no wonder they are so integral to our overall health. Thoughts can lift you up when they form dreams, bring joy, or recall happy memories, or drag you down when they present fear, suspicion, and worry. Thoughts can keep us stuck in past or future moments, distracting us from living in the present, engaging whatever is in front of us at the current moment. Thoughts can be true or false, and they are powerful either way. In order for our thoughts to contribute to sound health and permanent weight loss, they must add to our sense of well-being, fulfill our needs, and not add any undue amount of anxiety or stress. Learning to understand, handle, and control your thoughts as they happen to you will prevent an accumulation of negative emotions and help you develop supportive behavior patterns conducive to healthy living, including nourishing yourself properly.
Emotions, too, can be positive or negative. In his book Power Vs. Force Dr. David R. Hawkins rates the energy level of basic human emotions on a scale of 1 to 1,000, stating that anything hitting 200 or lower will be destructive of life both for the individual and for the society, while anything above that level represents constructive expressions of power. Here’s his rankings:
| Shame |
20 |
| Guilt |
30 |
| Apathy |
50 |
| Grief |
75 |
| Fear |
100 |
| Desire |
125 |
| Anger |
150 |
| Pride |
175 |
| Courage |
200 |
| Neutrality (no judgment) |
250 |
| Willingness |
310 |
| Acceptance |
350 |
| Reason |
400 |
| Love |
500 |
| Joy |
540 |
| Peace |
600 |
| Enlightenment |
700-1,000 |
You’ll want to live your life, of course, among the higher-ranking feelings on Dr. Hawkins’ scale. Your sense of self and well-being is best served by healthy emotions and positive thoughts. When bad things happen, it’s realistic to experience difficult emotional seasons, but it helps to have your inner compass set when you are ready to move on. You need to experience your feelings fully, but not linger too long in negative ones that could leave you physically imbalanced as well. You’ll need to call on many approaches to alleviate negative emotions and prevent them from getting a strong hold on your body, including resolve, forgiveness, restitution, and reconciliation.
SPIRITUALITY
The true source of well-being, joy, and contentment lies within one’s own mind and heart and not in the physical world. You may be trying to find that place by controlling your physical body—losing weight and getting healthy—but the truth is you need to find that place first, to allow the physical changes to come easily.
That’s why you need to embrace a more spiritual vision of yourself and of humanity as a whole. That’s the way to live and work and love with less fear and stress. Most of us live in two worlds: the world of doing and the world of being. The world of doing is generally concerned with making our lives and the lives of our loved ones more comfortable, trying to fulfill our needs, desires, longings, expectations, identity, and cultural conditioning. This road rarely leads to genuine happiness or a connection to our emotional and spiritual selves. When one problem is solved, another one appears. When one goal is achieved, it is only a matter of time before another one shows up and we are chasing after a new pursuit.
The world of being lies deep within all of us. It is our true self, our spiritual nature. It is characterized by silence, stillness, freedom, and love. Living in this world helps us to be calm. It puts us back in touch with what we value most: fairness, kindness, forgiveness, compassion, hope, love, and charity. Here the focus shifts from the physical world of what should be done (including about your health or weight) to the timeless, dimensionless part of one’s inner spiritual self that is already vibrantly healthy and does not need to do anything—just be.
BELIEVE IN THE pH MIRACLE
Step 1 for channeling your inner life positively is to believe in the approach to health you choose. In this instance, that means full faith in the alkaline approach as the very best we can do for ourselves and our bodies. A miracle requires faith! They key is to accept and practice the pH Miracle Living program not as restrictive, or a form of deprivation, but as rich and abundantly full of foods most suited to supporting ideal weight and health. Healthy foods are a blessing available to us, and with that in mind we can feel a sense of gratitude—a positive emotion—for the undertaking. And the more we eat the foods that are best for us, the more peaceful our minds will be.
So how we think about how we care for ourselves determines not only how likely we are to adhere to the lifestyle we choose, but also how much we will get out of it. That’s why we think it is so important for you to understand the principles behind each of our recommendations. I could write just one page of instructions for you to follow and leave it at that, but I don’t think you’d be able to put much stock in that without a full explanation of the rhyme and reason of it all. And the more you get out of the program, the stronger your belief in its rightness will be.
As your belief grows stronger, the alkaline lifestyle will become pretty much second nature to you; you’ll eventually follow it more or less automatically. That’s important to remember as you are starting out, when it seems there is so much to absorb. It can seem overwhelming. But don’t let that (temporary!) feeling prevent you from pursuing this solution to finding—and living at—your ideal weight. This is not a “diet” to go on and off of, it is a lifetime plan.
You will only be able to change your behavior after you have your beliefs, thoughts, and emotions where you want them to be. Once you do, it will be easy to decide what to put on your plate and in your mouth.
Make Sure Your Beliefs Are True
One important stop on the journey to thinking yourself thin is to recognize any false beliefs you might hold and correct them. If you don’t, false thoughts will follow, with negative emotions in tow. For example, you may believe that fat is bad, ugly, a sign of weakness, or a punishment, and because of that you think you are bad, ugly, weak, and deserve punishment. You may believe that being fat is genetic and that if your parents are fat your fate is pretty much sealed. You may believe you can put responsibility for your weight on some one or some thing other than yourself—your partner, a weight-loss expert, some magic bullet pill. You may believe that the best way to choose your food is by what pleases your taste buds most, or by what is most readily available.
Leaving those beliefs, or any others like them, behind you leaves your path to your ideal weight clear. Recognizing, for example, that rather than being bad, your fat has actually been saving your life—to this point—lets you think differently about its accumulation on your hips, stomach, thighs, and so forth. You can love your fat, thank it for protecting your health—and then, with your new awareness and alkaline lifestyle, say good-bye to it. Forever. After all, you’ll no longer need it.
On the pH Miracle Living plan, “dieting” is no longer about pure willpower, but rather comprises a new behavior coming as a result of a changed belief, thought, and, perhaps, emotion. Your new understanding of weight, fat, and health lets you make good food choices, acting on the principles of the pH Miracle. Your thinking becomes something like, “I choose my foods and drinks according to what I believe will be best for my health, energy, and emotional well-being. I give myself the very best delicious, alkalizing food on the planet because I know this food will keep me at my ideal weight and health.” Eating well becomes the great reward in life—not that brownie or that steak!
Once you are thinking intelligently about your food choices (“If I eat acid, I will gain weight; if I eat alkaline, I will lose weight or stay at my ideal weight”), and working with true and positive emotions, especially surrounding your health and weight, you’ll be able to really put the principles of the pH Miracle into practice. And following the principles will ensure your ideal weight.
How to Think Thin
• Avoid unnecessary emotional stress in your life.
• Develop strategies to handle unavoidable stress efficiently and constructively, and quickly move on.
• Learn to act upon, not react to, whatever you may face. Take a step back from the situation, and view it objectively, without judgment, moving away from the, feel of any negative emotion.
• Stay in the present.
• Do not linger in negative thoughts or emotions.
• Stay positive.
• Don’t beat yourself up if you slip up. Forgive yourself, and keep going.
• Avoid the accumulation of negative thoughts or emotions.
• Expect that you (like everyone else) will go through several emotions on any given day—and that some will be positive and some will be negative. Practice facing those emotions head-on, solving problems quickly if possible, changing false beliefs and destructive negative emotional reactions—and reserving your energy for more enjoyable, relaxed times.
• Discover how your emotions relate to your eating habits. Don’t use eating as a coping mechanism. Learn other, more productive ways to cope.
• Get plenty of rest. A good night’s sleep is vital to a normal metabolism. Insomnia, or waking up at 2 or 3 A.M., many times results from an emotional issue surfacing in your subconscious and disturbing restful sleep. It can also be related to adrenal exhaustion from a stress.
• If necessary, or if you find yourself repeatedly “falling off the wagon,” consider consulting a therapist to help you unlock pent-up emotional issues and resolve them.
• Set realistic short- and long-term goals and have reasonable expectations of yourself. Value your weight-loss process and goal. How much do you desire to be slim and healthy again?
• Give yourself a realistic time frame or deadline, and commit to it.
• Reward yourself without food. As you reach your goals, give yourself a huge pat on the back—and continue on. Choose as rewards something you value, like signing up for a class you’ve always wanted to take, going on a trip, shopping for a new outfit in a smaller size, or treating yourself to a piece of art to hang in your home (every time you pass it, you’ll be reminded of your accomplishment).
• Take time every day for contemplation, prayer, or meditation. Realize all your blessings and express your gratitude.
• Discover what triggers you to eat what’s not good for you—stress, comfort, socializing—and seek to avoid them. You need to understand your urges in order to manage them.
• Express your emotions. Laugh. Cry.
• Believe in yourself.
• Work on your own self-interest. Make time and space to do what’s best for you; do what will make you healthy, strong, smart—and happy. That applies well beyond the realm of food. Go back to school, take an art class, dare to dream—and then do it.
• Think about weight loss not as an event but as a journey. Make it a new and exciting growth experience. Be grateful for all you’ll learn along the way.
THE CHOICE IS YOURS
The ultimate key to all of this is you. You have to decide that you are going to change for the better. No one can make this choice for you, nor can you put responsibility on anyone else. No plan works without you doing your part. If you want to be your ideal weight, if you want health, energy, vitality, you have to do it. You can’t buy it or get it ready-made. You are free to choose, right or wrong. You can eat salad or steak. You can drink good water or not. You can commit to exercising or not. You can be slim or not. The choice is yours.
While you choose, you should keep in mind that the choices you are making have an impact not only on you, but also on your family, community, and society.
MAP YOUR ROUTE
The journey to success involves asking yourself where you are, where you’re going, and how you’re going to get there. There’s no other way to find the right path for yourself—and stay on it. If you don’t like where you’ve been, or where you are, clearly you’re going to have to change tracks!
To move forward in the best direction, start by clarifying your destination. That is, set your goal. You need something specific (and measurable) to aim for. Otherwise, how will you know when or if you get there? Your goal also needs to be reasonable; planning to shed fifteen years’ worth of excess weight, and at least as many years’ worth of bad habits with lightning speed is only setting yourself up for failure. Your goal also needs to have a time frame. So, decide you want to lose 20 pounds by June, and be at your ideal weight of 145 pounds by August. Or that you want to lower your blood pressure to within normal range within three months. Or that you want to wear a size 8 dress to the annual Christmas party. Or that you want to put on 10 pounds’ worth of muscle. Think carefully about exactly what you are after. Then, write it down. Committing it to paper is how you commit yourself to it.
Break it down, now. You’ve got your final destination in mind and your overall goal, and now you need to plot out the specific stops on your trip. These should be smaller markers you can keep an eye on to make sure you are still going in the right direction: changing one thing about your diet each week, or cutting back on portion size, or buying more fresh produce. Once again, write down your plan.
Now ask yourself—and note down your most detailed and honest answers—why you want what you want. Broaden your scope again, as far as you can. In the service of what, exactly, do you want to lose that 20 pounds or buy new clothes? What is your purpose on this journey? Is your ultimate aim to feel good? Look good? Feel good about yourself? Feel in control of your life? Increase your strength? Have more energy? Raise your self-esteem? Live longer? Feel sexy? Be healthy?
There’s no one right answer. In fact, there’s not just one answer for any given person. But it always pays to know why you want whatever you’re after. Once you know why you want something, the how is not so hard. Once you are clear on your reasons, you can move forward without hesitation. A compelling purpose gives you the drive to follow through.
Now you’re ready to get down to the nitty-gritty of creating an action plan for yourself—and writing it down. And I don’t just mean scribbling “follow the pH Miracle Living program.” You need to lay out exactly what you’re going to do and when and how. That means, planning a time to go produce shopping at least once a week; getting to know your local health food store and especially the oils and supplements therein; cutting out all acidic foods immediately; taking a more gradual approach by eliminating dessert this week, pasta next week, and so on; and making dates with yourself for exercising. Take stock of the resources available to you as you progress: the people, places, and things that can help you get where you want to go, like a like-minded friend, the gym, or a rebounder—then put them to work. Be sure to build in some flexibility to make sure your specific plan is doable for you in your busy life.
There are many ways to achieve a result, so as long as you stay focused on what you want, have a strong purpose to drive you, and stay flexible in your approach, you will find your way.
JOURNAL
As you’ve seen, you’re going to need to be doing a lot of writing. As a human being, you’re bound to forget about even important things within three to five days if you are not constantly reminded of them. So if you haven’t done it already, I recommend starting a private journal to not only keep track of the specifics of your progress, as in chapter 11, but also your mental and emotional journey.
In addition to the things I’ve asked you to write down over the course of this chapter already, here are some other topics that should get your pen moving: Do you really want to lose weight and get healthy? How will it make you feel to accomplish your goal? What will you gain if you do? What will you lose (besides pounds!)? How will getting healthy and slim affect your everyday life, both in the short term and long term? How will your life be affected if you fail? Do you believe you can succeed? How committed are you to your goal, and to your plan for reaching it? Do you feel you deserve to be healthy and fit?
Your journal should help you through the actual weight-loss process. You can use it to track the details of your progress, your measurements, and so on. I recommend keeping a food diary, taking notes on what you eat and where and why (your mood at the time). Review it every so often, not just to see if you are making smart food choices, but also to see if you can pinpoint a pattern to when you make bad choices. If you are using food to soothe or reward yourself, for example, look for healthier alternatives.
Furthermore, your journal should help make sure your thoughts, emotions, beliefs, and spirit are ready and willing to support you along the way. Write down both physical and emotional challenges. Spend some time with your journal every day—if not writing in it, then reviewing the wealth of information and inspiration already in there. Or both! It will only help to constantly review what you want to be, what you want to attain. Seeing the reasons you’ve documented for your weight-loss journey will boost your motivation.
JUST BEGIN
The hardest part is to begin. Once you do get started, it will get easier every day to follow this program. As you begin to practice the principles in this book, and in this chapter, you’ll be able to see the changes that occur as a result, on the physical, psychological, and spiritual levels. As you begin feeling (and looking!) better, you’ll start thinking better, and when you are thinking better, you will also do better. Not only will the weight start to come off, but also you’ll experience more energy, feel less pain, be less sick, and generally feel a sense of overall well-being. All this will confirm for you that you are on the right path.
If you fall off the wagon once in a while, just hop right back on. The more you stay on, the less you’ll fall off. Weight loss is not a single event, it is a process. You have to take it one step at a time. It may not be easy, but it’s worth it. You are worth it.
