My most dear John,
The joy is not easy, with my poor English, to describe when a letter with your American postage stamps comes into my slot. It is a most happy and satisfied slot, I can promise you! And on the last few occasions, the joy has been made more deep by my knowledge that the time for us to meet gets closer with each passing day.
So many things I have told you about myself and so many things I have not! It is beyond conceiving how many mysteries remain even in the minds, souls and hearts of two persons who have tried with all effort to gain maximum intimacy. For example, you know already how I like a man to touch me, and on which pieces of my skin, and with what emphasis of pressure and softness, but do you know yet about my granny and grandpa? I believe not. They live in small village about ninety kilometres from Odessa. There I spent my childhood. Besides the village there is a forest with a great plenty of berries. We gather them and make jam and marinaded mushrooms. It’s very tasty. Tell me more about your family and job, John. Do you like it? When we are embraced together, I don’t wish to expend precious minutes on such ordinary things.
We have waited so long and I cannot wait to see you and I am so worried about everything. But I trust you with all the faith placed in me by God and by your own sweet words. My dearheart, I have excellent news for you! The ticket for the aeroplane has now been purchased and is safe in my home. A hundred times per day I must touch it, stroke it, in case it suddenly is not real! Only when I am finally united with you, will I be able to show my thankfulness for your sending of the money and the possibilities that have been opened by this act. You will learn how powerful can be the love of a woman who has been pulled out of the deep water! Because, before I met you, I was drowning in my troubled life. But now I am ‘drowning’ in love for you!
True to say, I have not been so healthy in the recent days. Weather here has been strongly freezing. I caught a fever and a grippe, and for some time I was weak and lacked mobility. But I am mending fast – because I am young, I guess! When I finish writing this letter I propose to have a hot bath containing medicinal salt. It will helps my health but also, as ‘side-effect’, it makes my skin very velvet and soft. Soft for you!
Now that the time approaches for us to be together, I understand that there are many things still lacking arrangement. I possess many clothes which are purposely selected to envelop my form, the exact measures of my body. You have seen pictures of me inside them, I know. You asked me how is it possible for a girl in a poor country like Ukraine to buy such beautiful clothes, and I informed you that, in this way, we show our pride of ourselves, even as we suffer the lack of other necessary things. But I have realised suddenly, my dear John, that I have not suitcases for bringing these clothes to our new home in the USA! Because I have never travelled beyond the borders of my country! So I must implore you please, to make it again possible for us to have the union that is smooth and without ‘headaches’. Regrettably, you cannot, this time, use the bank account of my mother. She has become a little jealous of me, I think, for my good fortune in meeting a man as wonderful as you. A mother should wish the best outcomes always for her daughter, so this jealousness hurts me a small bit, but in defence of her I must say that it is difficult for a man from the West to imagine the burden upon females in countries such as ours. I recall that you discussed in one of your letters (please, PLEASE send me more letters, darling – they are to me like nectar in a dessert!), you said that it was remarkable that in our country it seems that all the young women are very shapely and beautiful, and all the middle-aged women are without shape and ugly. And you were confounded, when does it happen, this change? Because in America the women remain in good shape, and lose their beauty only slowly. Well, this is because life in our country is too bad. Only for a limited sum of years can a girl fight away the attacks of hard existence. It is like a siege that continues for ever. A time comes when the girl cannot fight longer and then the years of bad things fall upon her and she is destroyed. But I will not be destroyed, my darling, because you have come to my aid! Thank you, thank you, thank you, my most wonderful man! My hero!
But I was saying about my mother. She says that I must travel only with the clothes on my back, and not cry and make big fuss about leaving all my beautiful dresses and underwears and shoes that I have collected with so much love and sacrifice. So I discussed it with my uncle, who understands better my heart. He has proposed me to use his bank account, for you to send me some money for suitcases and other baggage. I am sure that $500 should be enough. My uncle’s name is Dmitry Morozov. The bank details you require to use are these – BENEFICIARY: MOROZOV DMITRY GR 671134 ACCOUNT: 939011008837002 BANK OF BENEFICIARY: COMMERCIAL BANK ‘PRIVATBANK’9C, Serova-Naberezhnaya, 40907 Dnepropetrovsk, UKRAINE. All the other details will be the same as before.
I thank you for your support and kind words – I thank you for being YOU! I know that when we are together we will always take care of each other and help each other with all the life trials. I’m so excited, nervous, happy, amazed and worried in the threshold of meeting … You see, my feelings are very controversial! But the foremost and strongest feeling is excitement!! Again I must stroke the ticket! And my passport, which I am sorry cost so much money for you. Alas, there is in Ukraine unlimited corruption. It will be a blessed relief for me to leave behind a country with so much deceitfulness and greed, and come to the USA. I still have difficulty to believe it is true, this future of ours … It is a miracle and you are a maker of miracles. Each time I desire you, a star falls from the sky. So, if you look up at the sky and find it dark with no stars, it is all your fault. You made me desire you too much!
I had a wonderful dream about you last night, dearheart. We sat in front of a warm fireplace in a log cabin in the middle of a harsh snowfall. We had a sheep wool rug wrapped around us for the warmth. Your skin felt so tender and smelt so good, I looked into your eyes and saw Paradise within them. Then you fell asleep and I watched your sleeping, and I wrapped you very snug in the sheep wool and all night I sat by the fire, keeping its burning alive. My goal now is to transform that dream into a reality.
I send you my sweet kisses and tight embraces …
Svetlana (Sveta) (Sweetie)