This book has many authors.
Before anyone, my parents and sisters, who saved my life and whose love was never contingent on results.
The brilliant and determined Asya Muchnick, who drew the best out of this book. The rest of the Little, Brown staff: Cynthia Saad, Michael Noon, Allison Warner, Ashley Marudas, and Alyssa Persons, who prove that people still do things better than they need to.
The subtle and terrifyingly effective Kathy Robbins, who signed on before the main character really existed and gave me the time and structure to find the book’s voice. No one could ask for better representation. Janet Oshiro, Jane Arbogast, and Liza Darnton at the Robbins Office are expert and extremely kind.
Susan Rieger, who led this book over the narrow path to an audience.
Many teachers: George Carlisle, David Newman, Katharine Weber, Kate Walbert, John Crowley. Ellen Bryant Voight, Pete Turchi, and Debra Allbery, who created and sustain the outstanding Warren Wilson writing program. Diana Wagman, Victor LaValle, Maud Casey, T. M. McNally, and Rob Cohen, who transformed my writing. Amy Grimm, who kept it all together.
At the D. E. Shaw group: Erin Granfield, Kari Elassal, Eugenie Kim, Drew Ashwood, Isaac Bauer, Claire Muldoon, Trey Beck, Alexis Halaby, and David Shaw, who let me survive in a kind of slow-motion writing retreat for eleven years.
The MacDowell Colony: David Macy, Karen Keenan, Kyle Oliver, Cindy Fallows, Courtney Bethel, and Blake Tewksbury.
Laura O’Loughlin, Greg Snyder, and the community of the Brooklyn Zen Center, who reminded me that it takes as long as it takes.
For help, love, reading drafts, and food: Josh Barenbaum, Nazli Parvizi, Sam Breslin Wright, Amdé Mengistu, Katy Dion, Amanda Filoso Schreyer, Nick Yap, Sarah Stehli Howell, Pete Light, Carl Bialik, Dave Goldenberg, Shamus Khan, Terry Bowman, Thackston Lundy, Marco DeSena, Jennifer Barros, Ben Kulo, Hannah Toporovsky, Lauren Dewey, Sarah Von Essen, Josh Billings, Victoria Blake, Mónica Palma, Calvin Burton, Ashley Powers, Erik Simpson, Christoph Janke, Megan Hustad, Ben Loehnen, Aria Sloss, Brigid Hughes, Ben Ryder Howe, Scott Adkins, Erin Courtney, Nathan Pinsley, Khaled Al Hammadi, Patrick Granfield, Kelly Granfield, Rachel Beach, Richard Sennett, Cullen Stanley, Julie MacKay, Leila Kazemi, Alan Donovan, Rachel Karpf, Sammy Tunis, Moe Yousuf, Nancy Hughes, Owen Hughes, Doug Kaden, Meg Weeks, Chris Weeks, Tyler Sage, Rachel Crawford, Jonathan Lee, Kate Scelsa, Deji Olukotun, Lindsay Edgecombe, Allison Lorentzen, David Herskovits, Jennifer Egan, and GPH.
And most of all, Sarah. My oasis, my love, and my full-on collaborator, who never wavered through all the bad versions. I wouldn’t have come close without you.