The council room is filled to the brim with reigning members and their assistants. It’s been an hour since Nash left my room, but now he’s next to me. Normally, that'd bring me comfort. Today, it brings worry.
The council members are noisily chatting away when they’re not giving me sidelong glances followed by quick head-ducks. I'm not in the mood for their antics today. Not in the mood for anything but running.
I'm the queen of this country; I can't run away.
It's a depressing thought.
“Quiet.” Nash brings things to order.
If only I could send him to some other place, where he'd be safe. Just sitting next to him is making me nervous. I lean away.
He continues when the room quiets down. “We have pressing business to attend. The criminal Daros, who tried to kill the queen, set up other queens’ deaths, and committed many other atrocities, has escaped.”
There are a few gasps, but most have probably heard the rumors.
Yuka, Head of Arts, turns to Jaku. “How could this have happened?”
“Due to lack of evidence of a struggle, we think there was a rogue guard. We're doing everything we can to prevent this from happening in the future, including—but not limited to—having more than two guards on duty at a time.”
“What happened to the other guard?” Timit asks.
“He was knocked unconscious,” Jaku says. “After that, there was no sighting of either Bolfa or Daros. We assume they used a secret tunnel.”
Like the secret tunnel Daros told me about, that I used to access Queen Deedra's chambers and kill her. I should have realized he'd know more about how to get around. Should have put extra men on him. Should have had him executed when I had the chance. Never mind that I promised myself never to kill again, I should have done it anyway.
Now, I'm faced with the consequences.
Everyone is talking over one another. They probably have been for some time.
“Silence.” My voice carries over their noise, quieting them. “One at a time. We will be civil about this.”
Because that's all I have left. That and my fury.
They look at me, hushing their tongues. I'm grateful it worked. “I need ideas on how we can find the prisoner. If you don't have anything useful to offer, stay silent. Time is of the essence, and we've lost too much of it. Jaku, Head of the Guard, and Sidle, Head of Military, are most likely to have useful input, so they will speak first.”
Sidle shakes his head. “Forgive me, Your Majesty, but the military is almost non-existent. I'm more of a figurehead than anything.”
“Why is it so small?”
He looks down. “Because we don’t fight with other countries. The mountains surrounding our country have always been enough to keep them away, and our people have been well-behaved, any issues contained by the guard.”
I want to growl at the absurdity. “You can't have gotten into this position without knowing something about how to deal with an escapee. Give me information I can use. Now.”
“It's impossible to track him, since we don't know which secret tunnel we presume he used. We know of none in the dungeons, but Jaku has men looking for them.”
“Jaku?” I ask.
“We’ve found no secret tunnels yet. I do have men out combing the streets and looking in bars and nearby establishments. We'll find them.”
It's not the guard I'm worried about; it's Daros. “Words are pretty, but not enough to save a life. I need thoughts. Ideas. Ways to get things moving.” To get him found. When no one speaks up, I huff. “I'm wasting my time having a council meeting.”
“It's not that we don’t want to help, Your Highness. We don’t know where to look for him,” Sidle says.
But I do.
Why didn’t I realize this sooner? It isn’t that I want to go, but if I don't more people than just myself will be in peril. This is something I must do. Not even facing my worst fears can stop me. I jump to my feet. Everyone else does, some stumbling to do so, but I barely notice. One thought has taken hold of me. “I know where to find him. Jaku, you're with me. Grab your best guards. We're heading out within ten minutes.”
I storm out of the room and head for the halls, like Daros himself is after me.
Multiple footsteps are following. The way behind me is filled with noise, but I ignore it. I have to focus if I'm going to do this. It's my one chance. I have to give it my best.
When I get to my sitting room, so I can change clothes and arm myself better, my guard Wilric says, “Let me check your rooms first.”
“Make it quick.”
He hurries off, and I tap my foot. I can't bring myself to look at Nash. It's still too painful to think of what I may have done to him by letting Daros escape. I may have risked more than his life. More than my own. More than those of others around me.
I can't show a partiality to him now, when others are near. Daros knows everything, no matter how hard I try to hide it. If he figures out a way to use my feelings for my people against me, I don't know what I'll do.
It won't come to that. We'll go to his house, find him, and I will give him a death sentence, despite what promises I made.
Wilric returns. “Your rooms are clear, my lady.”
I zip in, go past the sitting room, and straight to the bedroom. I've a plethora of daggers and poisons on my person, but it's not enough if I'm to take down Daros. I grab the rest of my tools. The poisons won't do any good, since he's either immune to them or has antidotes, but I grab them anyway.
I change to my best outfit for the occasion—a pair of black pants with multiple pockets for daggers and weapons. Then I put on a purple tunic with a black belt that has more places for weapons. Both are designed to give me freedom of movement.
So much better than a dress.
I halt long enough to glance out the window. I want to sleep and dream of the First Queen. Her advice would be soothing now, if nothing else.
I march through my rooms, and my escorts gather around me. “We are going to Daros's house,” I say. “You will follow my orders exactly. Wilric, run and see if Jaku is ready. Nash, you're staying here.”
Wilric takes off before I've finished. Nash is just as quick to reply, “I'm going.”
“It's not safe for us both to go. If I should fall, we’ll need someone to run the country until another queen is chosen.”
“I was a guard before I was your Head Advisor. I've trained for this and continue to do so. I can help.”
I wish I could express my fears, but there are too many people around. Even if it was only Nash, I can't let this out. Can't voice my fears and have them become more real than they already are.
I stare him down. He stares right back.
“Jaku is ready, Your Majesty.” Wilric pulls my attention away from Nash. “He will meet us at the front gates.”
“Head out.” I ignore Nash. Maybe if I do so the entire time we're out, Daros won’t pick up on my feelings toward him.
He seems to be good with this, as he takes a spot at my side. I pretend to pay him no mind. It’s hard when my body hums awareness at his very presence, but I try. My escorts continue to surround me as we go through the maze of hallways toward the front entrance. The path is familiar to me now, though there are still parts of the palace I don't know.
The closer we get to the front gates, the more my skin prickles. The more I want to turn back. But I refuse to stand down when this may be the only chance to catch him.
When we finally get to the gate, I'm pleased to see Jaku has a plethora of guards with him. More so than I've ever seen in one place before.
This is it. I can do this. Daros will fall.
I shout out directions to the soldiers as we move through the portcullis and down the lane. “Everyone needs to stay with a partner. This man is cunning and dangerous. When we get there, I want absolute silence. We will encircle his house before anyone enters.”
“What about your safety, Your Majesty?” Jaku asks.
“Getting Daros is your first priority. If it makes you feel better, a few men can stay close to me.” Not that I want to be hampered by them.
“Afet, Eldim, Wilric, and I will stay with the queen,” he says. “The rest of you follow her orders.”
The men come to me. They give me just enough room to walk, but not an inch more. Nash needs to stay out of danger's way. Which he won't if my life is at risk.
None of them will.
It’s a startling realization. There may be people who want me dead, but there are others who will defend me until the very end. At some point, my life became worth more than I ever thought it could. Than Daros ever told me it would.
I am worth something.
The thought puts a grin on my face—one that’s tempered by the situation but still wide.
The houses grow nicer as we pass into the Kurah area. Cleaner. More put together. The road is a smooth cobblestone. It hasn't been that long since I ran past all the houses, chased by one of Daros's men. Only, that time, I was by myself and hadn't a clue what I was doing. This time I do.
I'm taking him down.
I motion for silence as we near the house. When it comes into view, my stomach flops. Up, high on the ridge, is the window to my old bedroom. The one I escaped through.
The closer we get, the more my body revolts—skin prickling, hands clammy, mouth dry.
I don't want to do this.
I'm going to.
But not without my weapons. I take a dagger in each hand.
As soon as we reach the building, I motion for the group to move around it. They move silently and swiftly. Much more so than I expected. Once the signal that they’re in place comes from the back around to the soldiers in the front, I stride toward the door.
“Let me go in first, Your Majesty.” Jaku doesn't wait for me to respond. He and Wilric go ahead of me.
Jaku slips the door open, while several men point their crossbows at it, in case anyone should come out. The fact that it wasn't locked isn't a good sign. Is Daros in there waiting for us with a group of his men? Waiting for me? No matter that it hasn’t been long—knowing Daros, he has a whole slew of assassins at his beck and call.
I clutch my daggers tighter than I should, but I can't help it.
Nash is at my side. Even if I can't see him out of the corner of my eye, I can feel his presence. His warmth.
As I walk in after Jaku and Wilric, Nash is on my heels, with his sword drawn. Doing my best to ignore him—which is next to impossible—I slink through the house. There are no sounds. No people. No hint of life.
We should have run into someone on watch by now, if not more than one. Where is everyone? The house is crawling with my guards now. They're everywhere I turn. I go up the curving stairs. The last time I was here, I felt utter despair, but was determined to get away and never kill again.
I nudge open the door of my old room.
“Let me go first,” Nash says.
But I'm already in.
It's as I left it. Bare. There's nothing here except a couple of blankets.
I flex my fingers over the handle of my dagger. Memories fly at me—Daros choking me, dunking me in water until I couldn't breathe, breaking me and molding me into who he wanted me to be…
“Are you all right?” Nash's voice is barely above a whisper as he moves deeper into the room.
Am I?
“Ryn?”
“This was my room.” The words tumble from me. “The whole time he raised me, I lived here.” I remember believing there were monsters in the corners when I was little. None were as scary as the monster that haunted my days, though.
He glances around, probably taking in the small area again with new eyes. “Did he move the furniture out?”
“There never was any.” My voice sounds dead. I step back, so I’m next to the entrance.
His eyebrows mush together before rising up high. “Why wouldn't he give you furniture? A bed, at the very least?”
I don't answer. Can't.
He takes a step toward me. There's a soft creak of someone on the stairs.
Daros, coming to wrap his hands around my throat.
I bring my blade up to the neck of the person coming inside the room. The blade presses into their skin. He holds still as can be.
It's not Daros I'm holding a weapon to; it's Jaku. I snake back my arm. “Sorry.”
There's a thin line of red where the blade was. He touches it, and his fingers come away wet with blood. I suppose I was a little too forceful, but that’s what this place does to me. I have to be prepared for Daros, though it’s evident he’s not wandering the house. There’s always a chance, no matter how small.
To his credit, Jaku doesn't comment on it. He dabs at the wound with a handkerchief from his pocket and says, “The house is clear. There are no signs of life.”
I nod. There's one area I'm sure they haven't checked.
I motion Jaku down the stairs, before Nash and I follow after him. I move like a cat, prowling through the house with light steps. If Daros is in the hidden room, I don't want to meet him there. Not in that place.
What other choice do I have?
I'm on edge, memories of tiptoeing around flooding me, but my guards offer some comfort. Just not the kind I expected. Especially since it was a guard who betrayed me and let Daros free. I suppose the men and women who watch over me are to be trusted more than the ones on duty in the dungeons since they’ve been around longer and put through more testing. But is there any way to know their loyalty is sure?
The dark wood of the walls adds to the heaviness in my chest. The rugs over the same dark floor soften my footsteps. When we reach the outside of Daros's personal office, there's a stain of blood on the rug.
My blood.
He backhanded me with rings on when I didn’t obey him fast enough, sending me flying to the floor, dripping red everywhere.
I'm furious yet scared, and I don't have a way to stop it. Doesn't matter. If Daros is in his hidden room, I’m not sure how I’ll react. I don't want to fight him again. Yet there's no way I can let him go without a fight.
The door is wide open, the hidden room concealed inside. With slow, steady breaths, I try to get my shaking under control.
“Are we looking for something, Your Majesty?” Jaku's voice comes from behind me.
At some point he went from leading to following. My memories of this house make it hard to pay attention; it's a deadly trait that may get me killed.
I press on, not saying anything. I wasn't supposed to talk in here unless Daros commanded it, and I've already said too much.
I step inside. It's not like I remember it. The piles of papers on the desk are gone, books missing from his shelves. Chairs are knocked over, and the desk is shifted toward the single window. Did my guards do this, or was it Daros's people? Either way, he's not here.
Unless he's in the room.
I walk over to the empty bookshelf. To move all this stuff away must have taken some time. How long did he have to empty it? Did he do this even before he was captured? I can't imagine him ruining his things if he thought he was going to win me over at the coronation ball.
Of course, I wasn’t ever coronated. This still needs remedying, along with lowering the taxes, making the tax collection system better, and many other law changes.
I reach to the far side of the bookshelf and flick the hidden lever that’s smaller than my finger. I've had to flick it many times before.
Everything in me screams to run the other way.
My eyes burn.
My heart aches.
The soft whisk of the secret door opening is loud in the silent room. I don't turn to see who's following. I have to face this alone.
I go in before anyone can stop me, because it's the only way I'm going to make it. I keep my daggers out, ready for any attack that may come my way.
The only light comes from the coals in the fireplace. Either someone is here or they were recently, if the fire hasn't gone all the way out.
Footsteps come after me as I stand frozen several steps inside. My feet won't move. My momentum is gone. I want to vomit.
Someone's breathing is ragged. Harsh.
It's my own.
The room brightens. At first, all I can see is Jaku, holding a torch by the fireplace. Then the light wavers over the room. The vat of oil by the fireplace. The tub of water. The chains on the walls.
I shrink back.
Nash hisses. Other people murmur. Jaku moves his torch around the room, making me take everything in even more in depth. My daggers almost fall from my hands, but I tighten my grip.
It's then I see the dark shape in the middle of the floor. Daros? No. It’s male but too thin. I can't make much else out, since he's lying on his back. I prepare my weapons to attack should this person jump up. Nash keeps his sword at the ready as he inches past me. He bends down and seeks the man’s pulse.
A moment later, he says, “Dead.”
“Who is it?” Jaku asks.
Both men glance my way but say nothing further.
Nash rolls the man over.
Jaku grunts. “Bolfa. The guard who let Daros escape.”
I hope the poor man didn't pay for his choice of helping Daros by spending too long in this room of horrors.
Jaku moves forward. He leans down when he gets to Bolfa’s remains. “There's something pinned to his shirt.”
Nash takes it off. It's a piece of paper. He holds it up to the light and grimaces.
“What does it say?” I try to make my voice commanding, but it comes out small. Rickety.
With a quick glance at me, he folds the paper in half.
“What does it say?” My words are stronger this time.
Jaku nods at Nash.
With a scowl, Nash holds out the paper to me. I open it up. The handwriting is familiar, even if I wasn’t supposed to read it growing up. But now I’m supposed to. This note is meant for no one but me.
You will pay.
I swallow. “He's not here.”
“The body is cold, Your Highness,” Jaku says. “Judging by that and the fire's coals, I'd say it's been since sometime this morning that someone was here.”
“We missed him.” Nash sighs.
Daros is still out there hunting me.
Being in this room makes me want to cower. To hide. But no more. I will not be his tool to be used out of fear.
Something burns deep inside my gut. A vicious anger, like molten lava boiling through my veins.
With a growl, I hurl my knife at the far wall. It sticks in the wood, wobbling. Just like my heart.
Doesn’t matter. I will find him, and I will have him put to death.