The council members are crowding my sitting room, while my leg is resting on a chair. Last night, I went to sleep worrying about Nash. When the First Queen appeared, I refused to talk it over with her, instead discussing politics.
Now it’s time for a meeting, but the healer said I needed to stay off my feet. Rather than making servants carry me all over the palace, it’d be easier to have the council come here. None of their advisors will fit in the room, so it’s only the main council and me.
Nash is on my right, his presence burning that side of my body.
And through it all, I can’t even look at him.
I force my thoughts to the council members settling around the room. It’s been a trying twenty-four hours. I’m not sure I’m up for this. Doesn’t matter. I’ll do it anyway.
Keeping my expression neutral, I watch the rest of them sit in order. “Thank you for coming to my sitting room today. I know it’s an inconvenience. What’s on the agenda today?”
“We should discuss what took place yesterday,” Jaku says.
Not what I want to rehash, but at least it’s nothing to do with Nash. “By all accounts, the attack was sent from the Kurah. They are upset over their tax situation.”
“Which is why we should lower their taxes,” Timit says.
Not that I’m surprised, but for once with him, I’d like to be. “You’re only saying that because you are one of them. Besides, giving into them because they sent attackers after me is not a good precedent.”
“You did set the precedent when you gave into your Head Advisor’s kidnappers.” Timit looks smug.
The rest of the room is silent. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Nash make a tight fist. I keep tension out of my body, like I haven’t a care in the world. I manage to refrain from pinching my fingers together. “I may have done so at first, to get him back, like I would hope any of you would want, but as you may recall, I decided against it in the end. We need to take a firm position that we won’t give into such threats.”
“Even when your life is in danger?” Sidle, Head of the Military, asks.
“Even then.” I sound as confident as I am. “But the question remains—what are we going to do about it?”
“I say we install a flat tax. One that will be fair to all.” Timit beams at his own suggestion.
“A flat tax is not fair to all. It casts the heaviest burden on the Poruah and the least of it on the Kurah.” I did pay attention in all those lectures I got when I first became queen.
“I agree with the Queen,” Mina, Head of Foreign Relations, says.
“I think we can all mostly agree on that, but what else can we do?” Kada asks.
When the silence becomes uncomfortable, I say, “I propose that we use the money we have stored in the treasury to ease some of the burden. From what I understand, we have plenty in there.” I have yet to see it for myself—something I should remedy.
“We've been gathering that money for decades. It’s to be used in emergencies only. If we use it now, we won’t have it when we need it.” Timit almost sounds like the voice of reason.
Kada pipes in. “I agree. That money was to be used for special purposes, not at the whim of those who want a short-term solution.”
I tap my fingers on my lap. There must be something we can do. “What about the mines around Valcora that bring in so much wealth? Why could we not buy a mine as the government? We could use the income to subsidize the people’s needs. What’s more, we’d be providing more jobs to those who need them.”
“There are no mines for sale,” Timit says.
It’s like he’s trying to muddle everything I do.
“I don’t know,” Sidle says. “Perhaps we could find one. The country is rich with them. It would provide ample opportunity to make more money.”
“It’s worth a try,” Monkia says.
At least some are on my side.
Nash has been oddly silent. What is he thinking? I risk a glance his way, like I’m looking around the room, but it doesn’t tell me anything. He’s quiet and stone-like.
“Would someone like to add anything else?” I ask.
“I still say a flat tax would be best,” Timit says.
“Noted.” Time and time again. “Anyone else?” When the room stays silent, I know it’s time to make a decision, but I'll have to ask for Timit’s help since he’s in charge of the money. Oh well, there’s nothing to lose. If he doesn’t do a good job, I can always replace him. I just don’t know who with. “Having taken into consideration what you have shared with me, I would like to go ahead and leave things as they are for now. We should look into buying a mine. Timit, please see what you can do in that area. I’d be most pleased if you could find us a good deal.”
He grimaces, like he tasted something bad, but he says, “I will.”
“Very well, then. If there are no other concerns, I will see you all at the next council meeting.” Which I can hopefully walk to.
As the council heads out of the room, I tell Nash to wait. I shouldn’t meet with him alone much if it’s going to cause problems, but to do that, I’ll have to explain myself first. I can’t have him thinking I hate him. Far from it.
When the room is clear and the door closed, he turns to me. “You wanted to speak with me?”
“You make it sound so formal.” When he says nothing, I add, “Yes, well… I suppose it is.”
“Ryn.” The single word out of his mouth is twisted with longing and pain.
I want to reach out to him, but I stop myself. “How are you?”
Wrong question. He drops his gaze, his expression closing up. “I’m fine.”
Right. “You remember that I love you?”
“I do.” His gaze flickers back up to mine. “I love you as well, only I sense a but coming.”
Unfortunately. “It’s because I love you that I think we should ease off how much we appear to care for one another. It’s been brought to my attention that my preference for you is widely known. I don’t want to risk your life over something like that.”
He brushes his thumb across my fingers, sending waves of heat through me. “Loving you is not a risk.”
“Loving me is nothing but risks.”
“I’ll hold by your wishes to remain at bay, but that won’t suppress my feelings for you.” He leans closer, his breath warm on my skin. He brushes his lips against mine, the contact agonizingly short. “I will see you when you have a government job for me.”
He stands and takes several steps, before I gain hold of myself. “I do have something government-related to discuss with you.”
He turns and gives me an unhappy smile. “I’d best do it from over here.” He takes a seat across the room from me. “What can I help you with?”
“What did you think of my idea to open a government-controlled mine?”
“As long as the workers are treated well, compensated fairly, and not too much money needs to be sunk into it, it’s a fair idea.”
Fair. Not what I was going for. “Do you have a better one?”
“Truth? You know what’s best for this country more than you think you do. In the past months, you’ve spent time getting to know the people of Indell, you’ve changed laws for the better, and you do things to show you care about them. The only other thing you could do is maybe visit the rest of Valcora. See what your country is like outside the capital.”
“It’s a sound idea.” Though I’m not sure I’m doing as much as he thinks I am. “Perhaps I will make a country tour in the near future. For now, would you like to join me in investigating the treasury? I’ve never been, and I think it’s time I see what exactly my forbearers have stowed away.”
“I would accompany you, but may I suggest we take someone with us if you are trying to keep up appearances? Not that I would mind spending time alone in a locked room with you.”
My face heats. I clear my throat. “I’ll call for Jem.”
“Agreed. She’ll probably know what things are worth better than either of us.”
It’s funny that I didn’t like her when I first met her. Now her opinion is valuable, and I wish I spent more time with her. “Oh, I forgot. My leg. I can’t wander anywhere just yet.”
“I forgot as well. Does it hurt?”
“It’s nothing.” Compared to other injuries I've suffered, anyhow. “Maybe next week we can visit the treasury?”
“I’ll look forward to it, and I’ll let Jem know for you.”
“That would be appreciated.”
He heads for the door.
“Nash?”
“Yes?” He faces me.
I wish he would. I want to see his expression. “You can talk to me. About what happened.”
“We’ve talked enough.” His tone is sharp enough to pierce my heart.
Why did I think bringing up his torture would be a good idea? I should have left well enough alone. We were doing well. Now he’s leaving, and it’s not on good terms.
His hand is on the door knob, but he doesn’t turn it. He just stands there. Finally, he says, “I’m sorry. I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Thank you.” The knife slides out of my heart, but the wound is still there, bleeding.