The First Queen frowns. Have I seen her frown before? Perhaps, but not like this. I have the distinct feeling I did something to upset her.
She sighs. “It’s true. I am a little upset.”
“Why?” I tramp down my other thoughts. I don’t want to unwittingly disturb her more.
“If you must know, I’m slightly perturbed you told Nash about me.” She crosses her ankles, her green dress swishing.
“I didn’t think you’d mind. He’s good at keeping secrets.”
“I hope you’re right. I’d hate to have a witch hunt after you.”
Would that really happen?
She primly sets her hands together in her lap. “Difficult to say. Magic is mysterious in Valcora during these times. Only the Mortum Tura remains, and it’s been here for so long, people are accustomed to it.”
“Mysterious, yes, but a witch hunt?” It doesn’t feel true, but then again, Nash did say it might be dangerous.
“I’m not certain either, but there’s a chance it might come to that. I don’t want to take that chance on you when you’re finally starting to make a difference for the country.”
“You think it’s a good idea to use the money to create jobs? To buy a mine, so we can delve into the natural resources Valcora has to offer?” I ask.
“Trust your instincts.”
I relax. If she and Nash both think it’s a good idea, I may be on to something. What are my instincts? I search deep inside, for what I’m feeling. I almost get the impression I shouldn’t be investing the money back into the nation. That it would hurt, more than help. But that can’t be right, can it? I shove the feelings away. “I will do this.”
“I can tell you want to achieve great things.”
Heat rises to my cheeks. I look off into the distance, the colors of the sunset blurring together.
“You should be proud of what you’re accomplishing, not hiding from it.”
“Maybe.” I’ve never been pleased in a job well done. There’s always something not perfect about it. Something to improve on. Daros constantly reminded me of that.
“He is not what you should be judging yourself by. He is a despicable man, who thrives on destroying others.”
It’s hard to believe that I shouldn't judge myself. I hurry to talk before she can comment on that thought as well. “He’s still out there. I wish we could find him.”
“He’s sneaky. Hopefully, he’s run off to another country by now.”
“It’s possible, but unlikely. He likes to get his way, and he hasn’t. Something bad will come of it.”
“You’re strong. If he comes back, you’ll handle him.”
I should take the opportunity to think about that. What will I do with him when he comes back? He needs to die, but I promised myself to kill no more. I broke that promise once. I don’t want to do it again.
“But if it’s what’s best, maybe you should.”
“We’ll see when the time comes.” I’m slightly annoyed at her reading my thoughts, but tamp it down so she won’t be offended. Though I wonder…“Can I read your thoughts as you read mine?”
The skin around her eyes tightens. “No one’s ever tried.”
I find that surprising. It seems like a natural thing to do.
“Only because you think differently than other queens.”
The statement gives me pause. “In a good way or bad? No. You know what? Don’t answer that. Let me try to read your mind. If it doesn’t bother you, that is?”
“Go ahead.”
I concentrate on her, trying to discover her thoughts. Searching for a hint of her mind out there in the dark abyss. I hunt for it, pushing myself to find a scrap of anything. It doesn’t do any good. The way isn't as clear at all. “I’m getting nothing.”
She gives a slight nod.
“I may not be able to read your thoughts, but are you worried about something?” I ask.
“You caught that?” Her tone is as smooth as usual, giving nothing away.
“I did.” What could she possibly be worried about, in a dreamlike state such as this?
She sighs. “I didn’t want to bother you with it, but it’s left over from speaking about Daros. I’m not sure what to do about him. He’s become quite a pain, and if you think he hasn’t left the country—that he’s going to stick around and do more damage—I believe you.”
Is that what’s bothering her? Her expression is once again hard to read, so I go with what she said. She has no reason to lie, and it makes perfect sense. “That makes two of us,” I tell her.
“We can both think about it and see if we come up with anything.”
“I’ll try,” I say. “I’ve been meaning to ask you about your necklace. I saw it in the treasury.”
“You found it. I was wondering if you ever would.”
“You knew it was there?”
“I suspected. Other queens went in the treasury and saw it. I guessed it wasn’t removed.”
“But you didn’t know?”
“Not for certain. Why such interest in my necklace?”
I'm not sure exactly. “I think it has something to do with proving that you exist.”
“You doubt still?”
“No. It’s good to have a reminder, though.” I pause before plunging forward. “Does your necklace do anything special?”
“What do you mean?”
I shrug. “There was something about it when I saw it.”
“Perhaps it was reverence and respect for it, knowing it belonged to me.”
“Maybe.” But I have a feeling she’s being evasive. Why? I try to clamp down on that thought, but it’s too late.
“Why would I be evasive with you? I have no to reason to be.” She doesn’t sound hurt, but neither does she look happy.
I shrug. “It’s an old habit, from being with Daros. I’m not used to people being up front with me yet.”
“You can trust me. You know that, don’t you?”
I search my feelings. Warmth and sweetness encompass me. “I do.”
“Good. I want us to be on the same team. That can’t occur if we don’t trust each other.”
“What happens when a queen isn’t on your side?” Though I don’t plan on going that way myself, I am curious what would happen with someone like that, having the First Queen stuck in their head with no way to escape.
“Like Deedra?”
The queen before me. “Yes. What was that like for the both of you?”
“When a person doesn’t fit with my plans, it’s… trying.”
“I can’t imagine being stranded in someone’s thoughts and not getting along with them.”
She gives a thin smile. “It’s not easy. Some people are more enjoyable than others by nature. It’s not something I like to think about.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to bring up difficult topics for you.”
“It’s fine. I know you have a curious mind.”
Too curious for my own good. Daros smashed a lot of it out of me, but it seems to be coming back more than I’d expect.
“It’s about time for you to wake up for the day. Anything else you’d like to ask before you go?”
“Will you always be here, helping me?”
She smiles—a wide, bright expression. “I will.”
“Thank you for your guidance.”
“Always.”