Turn the fruitcake into another dessert. Turn the fruitcake into another dessert.
Do not serve the fruitcake as is. Slice it very thin, tear the pieces apart, and use them in an English trifle, a dessert made with alternating layers of cake (née fruitcake), custard, whipped cream, and, sometimes, fresh fruit. Serve in a deep glass bowl (often called a trifle bowl).
Use the fruitcake as a doorstop.
Fruitcakes are very hardy and will last for years. Use the fruitcake to prop open a door.
Use the fruitcake to prevent your car from rolling.
When parked on a hill, wedge the fruitcake under the downhill side of a rear tire. In your garage, position the fruitcake on the floor as a tire stop to prevent the car from hitting the garage wall.
Use the fruitcake as a dumbbell.
A good-size fruitcake may weigh several pounds. Incorporate it into your exercise routine, holding it firmly for arm curls, or squeezing it between the feet for leg lifts.
Use the fruitcake in a carnival game.
Collect fruitcakes and stack them vertically in a pyramid. Using tennis balls, try to knock down the fruitcakes in five throws.
Set up two fruitcakes either horizontally or vertically, depending on the size of the books.
Use as art.
Bolt a fruitcake to a painted board, frame it and hang it on your wall, or simply place it on a pedestal. Position the fruitcake in a well-lit area.
Use the fruitcake as compost.
Fruitcakes are made of (mostly) organic material, and make good fertilizer. However, it may take several years for the fruitcake to decompose.