Opening Divine Dialogue: Personal Healing with the Ancient Ones

Tiffany Lazic

Under a moonless sky in a homemade crystal cave at a time of seeking, three figures approach: one woman to be, one woman who has been, and a goddess. Crones all three, and each bearing a message. Or rather, the same message told three different ways. I recognize the woman who has been. It is my mom, who has dwelt many years now in Summerland. The woman to be is somewhat recognizable as me, but she is old, wrinkled, and gray and seems not to have the same cares upon her shoulders. The goddess, though, is well known. She is the Crone, the Hag, the Cailleach. I have seen her many times and have tried to avoid her as many times as I have turned to her. She has been sharp, unyielding, and stern. But she has also been steady, understanding, and, in her own way, deeply loving. She has always called me to bring my best, especially during those times when I wished to turn away from her.

We have many ways to connect and communicate with the gods and goddesses, those key archetypal energies that have provided guidance since time immemorial. Engaging with these energies in ritual, whether solitary or in a group, allows us to enter their stories and experience ourselves in the flow of the river of time. These themes have appeared over decades, centuries, and eons. Ritual brings the timeless to today. We step into it and awaken our mythic dimension in the context of our greater community and the cycles that touch us all.

But there is a more individual and personal approach to working with the gods and goddesses. They can help us become aware of where we may have become lost to the truth of ourselves. They can guide us to shift where we are stuck or have repressed our inner strength and wisdom. They can reflect to us the best in ourselves. Transpersonal psychology works with the concept of subpersonalities. Best known through the work of Robert Assagioli (who developed an approach to psychology called psychosynthesis), Hal and Sidra Stone, and John Rowan (to name but a few), a subpersonality is the term used to describe a mask we put on in order to protect ourselves. Subpersonalities are roles we embrace to ensure our acceptance by others. If we do not feel we will be accepted just the way we are simply for being who we are, then we will engage a subpersonality to receive the attention we seek according to an unconscious belief about what we perceive to be acceptable to others. Subpersonalities are not who we are, but who we present ourselves to be to others to fulfill a very specific function.

But there is a more individual and personal approach to working with the gods and goddesses. They can help us become aware of where we may have become lost to the truth of ourselves. They can guide us to shift where we are stuck or have repressed our inner strength and wisdom.

We all have subpersonalities. They are unavoidable in a society that has such a prevalence of low self-esteem. Rooted in shame, subpersonalities are “born” in childhood in order to get our needs met. In order to gain positive attention from your parents, you may have become the Hero Child or Perfectionist. As the well-known axiom goes, “If we can’t get good attention, we will settle for whatever attention we can get,” and thus you may have instead become the Scapegoat Child or Rebel. As we grow into adulthood, we carry these familiar ways of being with us. We may not even recognize them as being separate from who we are, and we may believe that they are, in fact, an aspect of our true personality. Some common subpersonalities include the Caretaker, Rescuer, People-Pleaser, Approval-Seeker, Martyr, Bully, Victim, Pillar-of-Strength, Saboteur, and, of course, the almost ever-present Critic. Each subpersonality carries its own distinct stamp and functions in its own way. We may call them by different names, but the “stamp” is always recognizable. My Perfectionist may present slightly differently than your Perfectionist, but both of them are trying to cover up a deeply rooted sense of inadequacy. Both are informed by Shadow rather than Light.

Subpersonalities differ from roles we need to take on to get a particular job done or contribute to our community in some way. I may consciously take on the role of teacher because I love learning and sharing what I have discovered, but I can recognize that that is not who I am. It is a job I do that happens to be in alignment with my inner passion. With subpersonalities, we do not recognize that we have a choice in behavior. It is important to begin to distinguish between the truth of who we are at our core and the ways in which we have adapted ourselves to be acceptable.

If subpersonalities arise out of our insecurity, shame, and Shadow, then the Ancient Ones can aid in leading us back into the Light. As universal archetypes, the gods and goddesses are reflections of key divine qualities that we can reclaim within ourselves, transforming the dark we have carried for so long. Much like subpersonalities, many gods and goddesses reverberate with a similar quality, though the particularities of expression differ from culture to culture. A sun god is a sun god, whether we call him Helios, Apollo, Lugh, Tonatiuh, or Ra. Though each one has a host of stories specific to the land from which he hails, each also reflects the message of light, vitality, courage, and energy. The tales of the Ancient Ones are not without trials and challenges. It is through their stories, as well as through the archetypal energy they carry, that we can gain insight about how to overcome our own obstacles and find the strength within to prevail.

In a list that is almost endless, what follows are some of the gods and goddesses that may be familiar, presented from the perspective of their main archetypal energy and how they can help resolve interpersonal dynamics and heal low self-esteem and shame.

The Mothers guide us to self-care and nurturing. A mother goddess knows what needs to be done to care for the life force that flows through each one of us, ensuring that our needs on all levels of being are met. She brings our attention to our physical bodies, encouraging us to nourish ourselves and get sufficient sleep and making sure we feel safe in our lives. If the mother goddess is not active within, the Caretaker subpersonality may show up. The Caretaker is far more focused on the needs of others, sacrificing herself in the process. The Caretaker believes that her worth comes from what she does for others and that if she stops taking care of others, she will be rejected. Some mother goddesses who can help heal the Caretaker and bring balance back into our lives are Gaia, Demeter, Yemaya, Hathor, Terra Mater, Danu, and Nerthus.

The Warriors guide us to come from a feeling of empowerment, anchoring within us positive self-regard, willpower, and a healthy approach to boundaries. A warrior god or goddess comes from that place of both inner and outer strength, reflecting self-confidence, self-worth, and personal power. If the warrior god or goddess is not present within, one of several subpersonalities can become evident. The Victim subpersonality experiences little personal power, seeing him- or herself as being at the mercy of other people, situations, or even life itself. On the other end of the spectrum is the Bully subpersonality, who attempts to feel worthy and significant through wresting power from others. In truth, what lies beneath the surface of the Bully is the same sense of inadequacy that informs the Victim. There are numerous warrior gods and goddesses who can help us learn to say no, express anger in a positive way, and stand up for what we know to be of intrinsic value in our lives. Some, such as Ares, Sekhmet, Kali, the Morrigan, and Thor, tend to be more forceful in approach. Some, such as Athena, Horus, and Tyr, tend to be more strategic and righteous in approach. Different situations call for different inner activations. Sometimes Athena energy just won’t do the job as effectively, and Kali really is necessary.

In a world of people who are experiencing information overload, the Communicators guide us to sift the relevant from the inconsequential and to express ourselves with eloquence and integrity. Many of these deities have been credited with gifting humanity with the written word or presiding over the expressive arts. They foster a sense of trust and reliability, knowing that one of the most valuable commodities we have is our word. They urge us to speak from both the mind and the heart, acknowledging the divine in every word. When one of these gods or goddesses is not present within, one subpersonality that can arise is the Drama Queen, whose words are inflated in order to feel important. Communicating the pain of a stubbed toe can reach epic proportions if fueled by an unconscious belief that no one will care. The Silent One operates from the same belief but will endure endless pain in silence rather than risk being ignored while vulnerable. Neither of these subpersonalities speaks the truth from mind and heart, nor, in the over- or under-sharing, does either honor the individual’s innate worth. The repression of the Communicators is also evident when lies, joking, deflection, veiled or hidden meanings, or duplicitous talk are present. Communicator gods and goddesses, such as Thoth, Ogma, Odin, Brigid, and Hermes, help us to recognize the sacred nature of communication and guide us to honor both ourselves and the other in the form and content of expression.

All archetypes are supported and enhanced if the Mages are present. These gods and goddesses are the conduits of intuition, providing guidance and wisdom. They help us to understand myth, metaphor, and symbols. They illuminate synchronicity in our lives so that we can feel the presence of the divine in even the smallest of occurrences. They encourage us to trust our inner sight and inner knowing, again bringing cohesion to mind and heart. And they always support us in seeing the bigger picture, knowing that our wisdom is best directed in service to ourselves, others, and the All. An inability to trust the Mages can result in the Controller subpersonality, who seldom listens to his or her feelings, striving to control situations and other people, which leads inevitably to stress and exhaustion, physically, emotionally, and mentally. We can evoke the Mages through meditation, being open to the presence of magic in our lives, and knowing ourselves to be one aspect of a far larger and immensely profound pattern. Learning a divination tool, such as tarot, is also an excellent way to connect to their energy. Isis, Ceridwen, and Hekate, goddesses of magic and transformation, are a few of the best-known and beloved Mages.

It was one of these faces of the Mage that I met that night under the moonless sky. Though at times, when she has approached me alone, I have felt her to be so strong, sure, and no-nonsense as to be frightening, there was something about seeing her alongside my loved and greatly missed mother and my much older self that helped me to recognize something of her in myself. The presenting trinity appeared as “Maiden, Mother, Crone.” This maiden was an old woman, this mother had long left the earthly realm, and this crone was timeless, but they all reflected the same message of wisdom and guidance, with particulars specific to my challenges, blind spots, and Shadow. They each reflected the Light to illuminate my path forward.

We are born of pure Essence. We lose sight of that. We become encrusted with heaviness, negativity, and self-abnegation. That is not our purpose. Our purpose is to reflect the beauty, grace, and magic of the divine while we walk upon this earth in human form. The Ancient Ones can lead us back again. They too reflect the dicey spots where we may be led astray, but they also offer the truth of our own brilliance, if we can garner the courage to let it shine.

Tiffany Lazic is a Registered Psychotherapist and Spiritual Director with a private practice in individual, couples, and group therapy. As the owner of the Hive and Grove Centre for Holistic Wellness, she created and teaches two self-development programs, Patterns of Conscious Living and Spiritual Language of the Divine, as well as teaching in the Transformational Arts College of Spiritual and Holistic Training’s Spiritual Directorship and Divine Connections Training Programs. An international presenter and keynote speaker, Tiffany has conducted workshops for many conferences and organizations in Canada, the US, and the UK. She is a member of the Sisterhood of Avalon, where she serves on the Board of Trustees, and is the founder of Kitchener’s Red Tent Temple. Tiffany is the author of The Great Work: Self-Knowledge and Healing Through the Wheel of the Year (Llewellyn Publications, 2015).

Illustrator: Bri Hermanson

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