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LANTA CLOSED THE HOOD of the hover-car and wiped her hands on the towel hanging from the waistband of her workpants. “The problem is the fuel. You’ve got too much of it. I’ll have to flush out the lines and give everything a good cleaning. There’s nothing wrong with the engine itself. It looks to be in good shape. I’m booked solid for the day, but you can bring it back tomorrow.”
Desah, her neighbor who lived in the unit behind hers, grunted. Old age made her slightly hunched and an old injury made her walk with a limp. One of her sons had gifted her the used hover-car and, despite having the vessel for over two years, and because she’d never had one in her life, she was still having difficulty maintaining it. What she needed was one that ran on solar energy and not fuel. Lanta made a mental note to bring the subject up with her son again.
Lanta glanced toward the other hover-cars and two transporters that were lined up to the right of her. She’d promised all the owners she would get their vessels back to them today. She’d over-extended herself, yet again. She would be working well into the night.
“I told you last week that it looked to be running sluggish. I even offered to take care of it right away then.”
“Now.” Desah was one for very few words.
She’d only began talking—if one-word answers could be considered talking—to Lanta recently.
When Lanta had worn her jewels, it had been easier for the Oncuns to look past her pronounced features, and pretend she was like them. Now her jewels were gone and she was fully embracing who she was, most Oncuns had reverted to shunning her.
Which they did unless they needed something, like having a vessel fixed. Then they would brave the walk to the make-shift garage she’d set up a short distance away from her apartment to speak to her.
Lanta shook her head. “It won’t stop on you today or tomorrow for that matter. I have some other commitments that I have in front of this one.”
Desah humphed then wobbled with an unsteady gait back to the door and tried to get into her vessel. Lanta let out a breath. The hover-car wouldn’t go out on her today, but what if it did when Desah was on one of her trips to visit her children and grandchildren? If that happened, she would have a long walk to go to get help. The distance between some of the villages could be more than a day’s journey.
What’s another hour to an already long day?
“Wait. Leave it with me. I can try to get it done on my lunch.”
Desah let out another grunt and turned to walk away. Lanta watched her retreating back for a few moments before realizing their conversation was over.
“You’re welcome!” she yelled.
Desah’s form, draped in a tan douli, a cross between a full-length dress and pants, disappeared. She didn’t really disappear. It was the position of the sun and brownness of the ground against the horizon that tricked the eye.
Lanta pushed the hover-car, moving it easily to park next to one of the others. She secured it in place with a strong rope. Satisfied that the wind, which had begun to pick up, wouldn’t make it drift away, she went back to the transporter she’d been working on.
Even though older model hover-cars were plentiful in her village, transporters were few and far between. Even an old and beat-up one, like the one she worked on, was considered a luxury. Sumiah didn’t use it to travel off-planet—it would never break the atmosphere—but he used it to travel to another part of the planet to trade goods. Without the transporter he wouldn’t be able to sell his wares and provide for his family.
Lanta had promised to have it fixed before the afternoon. Her rush wasn’t only because she’d wanted her client to be able to feed his family, but he had connections outside of her village. If he was satisfied with her work, he promised to let others know her prices were fair and she was fast. Word of mouth could bring in more business.
Since being fired, this line of work was her only source of income. She couldn’t survive on fixing only what was in her village. She had to expand. She wasn’t complaining though. So far, she’d been able to pay three month’s rent in advance, she had enough protein bars to last just as long, her water jugs were full, and she had an ample number of candles.
If her plan was to stay on Luur she would’ve been content. But staying on Luur wasn’t for her anymore.
It had taken her a month after returning from Ipakethe to realize that although Luur was her home, she didn’t belong here. She no longer wanted to be the same and fit in. She wanted to live, cry, smile, be happy, be sad, express opinions and most of all, be herself.
She couldn’t do that on Luur. Well, she could, but she would have a lonely existence if she did. She’d had enough of being lonely.
She’d thought with Elkah and Aunt Varlah, her life was full. But her mother had been right so long ago.
Lanta only thought she had a good life because it was the only life she’d known.
She now knew there was so much more.
She’d told Elkah of her plans to leave. To her surprise Elkah had agreed with her and conceded that Lanta would be much happier on a different planet. Lanta also told Aunt Varlah and received nothing more than a non-committal grunt. But later that evening, she’d gone home to find boxes of protein bars and candles waiting for her. Only two people had a key to her apartment and Elkah had been off-planet on a job at the time.
Aunt Varlah was still upset with her about the hit her reputation had taken over Lanta’s actions, but Lanta knew she still loved her. While the protein bars were a welcomed and nice surprise, Lanta knew that it would take a while for her to be completely forgiven. Lanta just hoped Aunt Varlah would forgive her sooner rather than later.
Lanta didn’t plan on paying another month’s rent. The three months she’d already paid was to be her last. Everything else she made would stay in her credit account and go toward her fare to Cleaprea, the planet Payton had lived on before moving to Ipakethe.
Payton still owned the house Themba had bought her when he’d rescued her from The Hunt and told Lanta she could live there as long as she needed.
Lanta also got in touch with an owner of a garage on Cleaprea. He told her he had work for her when she arrived. She’d much rather work on hover-cars and transporters on her own, to keep all the credits for herself, but without proper tools she knew that wasn’t possible. The hover-cars and transporters on Cleaprea were newer models than those in her village. She would need diagnostic tools and better equipment to work on them. If anyone here needed more than what she had to fix their vessel, odds were they couldn’t afford to get it fixed and it would have to be junked.
Lanta made her way into Sumiah’s transporter. It was bigger than Melis’s had been, this one a four-seater with a sleeper room in the back, but although outdated and almost obsolete, it was in good condition. He’d taken really good care of it.
She went to the control panel, where a mess of wires had been pulled out of the console. She knew the function of each one, and was in the process of replacing them all. When she was done the transporter could be of some use to Sumiah for a few more years.
Lanta took a seat in the pilot’s chair and pulled out a wire, replacing it with a new one from her box. It was tedious work, but she would get done well before the deadline. When Sumiah retrieved his vessel, all the guts would be back in the hull and the console would be sealed shut.
A few minutes later, the bell signaling an arrival chimed. Lanta let out a sigh. She loved that everyone brought their vessels to her instead of the garage a few villages over, but at this rate she wouldn’t finish the vessels lined up outside until after dinner. She was already guaranteed to have to spend more time lighting and re-lighting the candle to finish her work at the rate the wind was picking up.
“I’m booked for the day. No exceptions. Bring it back tomorrow morning,” she yelled.
The bell sounded again.
Hm. Oncuns wouldn’t keep ringing the bell. They would see it as an act of rudeness. Maybe the wind?
She’d hung the bell by a string attached to the roof of her tarp. Sometimes she was so engrossed in fixing a vessel that she didn’t hear anyone coming near. She’d hit her head on plenty of hoods and let out a startled scream too many times. She didn’t realize how quiet the Oncuns were until coming back to Luur. On Ipakethe it had been so loud, boisterous and full of life. She missed—
Lanta shut down that thought quick.
The bell rang again.
Wind. She decided.
“Lanta?”
Lanta stilled. She knew that voice. It was the voice that sent shivers down her spine and ignited her blood. The voice that made her happy and sad. The voice that held power and promise. The voice that held pleasure and pain.
It couldn’t be.
“I read the sign. I rang the bell but you didn’t come out.”
It was.
Her body trembled. She gripped the wires tightly in her hand. She couldn’t raise her head or turn around.
She’d spent months trying to get that voice out of her head. She also wanted to forget the body and person it was attached to. She’d just stopped remembering how he’d sounded whispering in her ear, and stopped seeing his face when she closed her eyes at night.
It had taken her forever to get to the place where she was now. Night after lonely night of being on the edge of insanity because he was all she wanted. But she had done it. She had pulled herself together and made herself whole. Right. Finally.
Then she’d become angry.
It took her a while to realize she had a right to be angry. He’d seen her naiveté as something to exploit for his own purposes. He’d picked her from the group because her vulnerability had been splashed across her body and, as a predator, he’d sensed her need to be wanted and loved. Easily.
He hadn’t loved her. And because she’d been so stupid and longing for any semblance of that emotion, she hadn’t cared about what he’d been telling her all along.
She was not the right choice for him. He could use her for advice and sex, but nothing else.
“Leave.” Her voice was hard. She spoke it in the Oncun language, using the rough dialect to express how she felt.
“I came here to talk. Can we talk?”
There was no power or command behind his voice. That voice she could’ve rebelled against. The tone he used now was pleading.
Lanta yanked the wire from the console and began replacing it. She had only had a few more hours to make her repairs. She couldn’t be late. She needed the extra credits Sumiah’s connections would provide.
“Lanta, please.”
She kept working, pulling and replacing another wire. “Please what, Melisizwe bu Kumkani, Kgosi of the bu Kumkani Kingdom? I have work to do. I don’t have time for you.”
“I deserve that.”
“I wasn’t asking for your approval,” she growled. Every emotion she’d buried these past months rose, bubbling to the surface. “Leave.”
“I’ll leave you to it then.”
She listened, straining her ears for the sounds of his retreating boots. When she was sure he was gone, only then did she chance a glance over her shoulder to the empty doorway. He could’ve been a figment of her imagination for all she knew. She quickly dismissed that thought. No. The thundering of blood racing past her ears was proof he’d been here. She could still smell his scent lingering in the air.
Lanta finished working, pushing out any thoughts of why he’d come or where’d he gone from her head every time they popped up. These things weren’t for her to figure out anymore. There’d been a time, which felt forever ago now, where she’d wished for Melis to show up and whisk her away from her all her hardships and heal her broken heart. But she didn’t require saving anymore. She didn’t have any hardships and she didn’t have a broken heart.
Sometimes it felt as though she didn’t have a heart at all.
Sumiah came later that morning, paid her well and promised to talk about her services to his colleagues. Desah retrieved her hover-car after lunch. Lanta finished the other vessels well after the sun went down. She secured her tarp with her tools underneath it and cleaned her hands with the cleaning solution. Water was scarce on Luur, but the cleaning solution was plentiful.
As she made her way back to her apartment, carrying the waning candle in her hand, she spotted the figure sitting on the ground outside of her door. Although it was dark, she knew instinctively who it was. Her traitorous heart leapt for joy.
Lanta swallowed the breaths that kept lodging in her throat and somehow made it to her door without her knees giving way. Her reaction to him was still the same, even after all this time, and after she’d thought she’d hardened her heart to him.
Lanta stepped around Melis and unlocked her door and went inside. Just because her insides were going crazy at being near him again didn’t mean she had to give in and talk to him. She had gotten over him before. She could do it again.
When Lanta tried to close the door behind her she found resistance.
Melis stood, blocking it. Gone were the expensive looking garments. The clothes he wore could be found on any traveler who wanted comfort; lightweight tan pants and shirt. His hair was in multiple, small single braids.
“I came all this way. Hear me out.” He didn’t command it. Power wasn’t in his voice. Was he begging her?
Even though her heart ached at the tone of his voice, she ignored the feeling. Lanta no longer made her face slack or hid her emotions, but she felt the familiar heaviness on her features.
“I didn’t invite you here. The fault is not mine. If you would’ve called, I would’ve let you know when I was receiving guests.”
“Which would have been?”
“Never.”
Melis sighed and pushed through the door. “That’s why I didn’t bother with a call.”
Lanta humphed and went to her table, placing the almost dying candle there before lighting another one. She didn’t feel the need to light more than the two. Her apartment was small and she didn’t expect Melis to stay long.
If she cared, she might’ve been embarrassed by her one room apartment. Melis was used to luxury while she had none of it. Her apartment wasn’t much, but it was hers and it was clean.
She didn’t have a comfortable bed propped off the floor. But the blanket covering the floor mattress was spread neatly. Her kitchen wasn’t what he would identify as a kitchen, but she had a hearth to cook food if required, boxes of protein bars in a corner, and her jugs of water on a shelf with the only cup she owned. A tarp and her sparse clothing rack shielded her only luxury, a sonic shower, from view.
While her apartment was clean, Lanta knew she looked a mess. She hadn’t bothered with putting her hair in a bun or tying it back. With the sides growing in, she wasn’t left with many styling choices and her coils were unsecured, wild and free. Her clothes were dirty and she was damp with sweat. She needed to shower and clean her clothes.
But most importantly, she needed him gone so she could get on with the rest of her life.
“Why are you here? Get on with it, then go. I have to get up early.”
“To work on the vessels?”
Lanta turned to glare at him. “What of it? It’s good work.”
“It is good work and it looks like you’ve got a nice business.” He dropped his chin. “I heard about what happened to your job and your security ranking. I’m sorry, Lanta. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”
“I don’t need your apology. I knew the risk.”
Lanta sat in one of only two chairs and it groaned under her weight. There was always a threat that it would break but, until it did, she would keep it. When she moved to Cleaprea none of her furniture would go with her. It would be left as a gift for whoever rented the apartment after her.
She began the task of taking off her boots. “Why are you here?” she asked again.
“I wanted to see you.”
She ignored the longing look he gave her and stored her boots under the table. “Mission accomplished. Bye.”
“I came to talk to you.”
Her heart fluttered. No. Stop that.
Her body rebelled against her mind, but she had to stay strong. “You’ve done that too. My, oh, my. You’re just checking all types of accomplishments off your to-do list.”
“Lanta. Please hear me out. Then I’ll leave.”
She folded her arms and leaned back on the uncomfortable chair. “Fine, but when I get up it will be to show you the door. I know you’ve been trained in the art of fighting, but so have I. If I have to kick your ass and slam the door in your face, I will.”
“You’re using human curse words. I see you still keep in touch with Payton.” When her only reply was to glare at him, he added, “She refuses to talk to me about you.”
“She’s a good friend. I asked her not to mention your name to me ever again.”
He scrubbed his hand down his face. His beard was longer than she remembered it. “I was hoping that you knew I didn’t take a mate. Did you at least know that?”
She didn’t. She’d read the news files non-stop for two weeks after she’d returned. Looking for an announcement regarding his bonding with Bienke. She’d been obsessed with it. Then, realizing she needed to heal, she placed blockers on her news feed, removing all words with Melis and Ipakethe from it and asked Payton not to give her updates.
“That information means nothing to me.” There was a time when she would’ve inquired and wanted to know what happened. No more. Not really.
He let out a hard breath. “I was able to secure the alliances I wanted. I even convinced some of the other Kgosis to unite with me and we’ve completed our application to be recognized as a Class 5-ii planet. One of the conditions of Yolto’s release was that he transition his title to his son, and required his son to sign a treaty with us and the other Kgosis. I think the governing body of the AC-141 XM3 sector will at least review our application this time, since four out of five Kgosis signed it. The application also had some recommendations from prestigious kingdoms. I still have to get Imir’s heir to join us though. If I can do that before the final verdict on the application, I think we’ll get it.”
She stared at him unblinking. He still wanted her to join his advising team. That had to be the only reason he was here. He thought after everything they’d been through that he could breeze through her door and she would still be so enamored with him that she would drop everything and become an advisor—the hired help. Did he actually think she could go back to that palace and not be reminded of what they’d done and how special he had made her feel? It had been so easy for him to forget about the time they’d spent together, but the pain of being discarded like trash was still fresh for her.
She glared at him. Old hurt simmered under her skin.
“Ipakethe is safe now and we’re moving forward a plan to export goods from the local merchants. With Bienke’s help, we’ve also began construction on tourist attractions. We won’t be able to rival her family’s pleasure planet, but it should fit our needs.”
If he mentioned he and Bienke were planning a future ceremony she would launch herself from the chair and pluck out his eyeballs.
“Ancients, Lanta. Say something.”
She slow-clapped. “Looks like you accomplished everything you wanted.”
“No. I didn’t. I’m still missing my mate.”
She didn’t want to hear him talking about mates. The familiar pain in her heart began again, twisting, spreading. “Is that why you’re here? You want me to tell you who you should pick? I told you before that Bienke was the best choice.”
“I want you.”
“I’m not working for you, Melis. I declined your offer before and I’m declining it now.”
“No, I want you, Lanta.”
Confusion rolled through her. She surely hadn’t heard him right. “You made it clear the last time we were together that you didn’t want me, and the numerous unanswered messaged that I sent you confirmed that. What game are you trying to play?”
“No game. I only want to claim my mate.”
She blinked. Then blinked again.
“I came for you, Lanta. My true lifemate.”
The idea sounded so absurd. Her? His true lifemate?
She laughed. “I have to thank you. I don’t think I’ve laughed since leaving Ipakethe. You don’t have to lie to me, Melis. If you wanted a fuck you could’ve just said so. The answer would be no. But lying? You’ve never had to lie to me before for me to spread my legs.”
“Lanta. Don’t.”
She laughed again and stood. “I listened to you long enough. Now it really is time for you to go.” She walked toward the door and opened it.
Melis slammed it closed. “Why don’t you believe me?”
She rounded on him. Anger made her vision blurry. “You expect me to believe you? When did you realize I was your lifemate?” She stabbed him in the chest with her finger. “Hm? Was it when you were asking my advice about the females you wanted to mate with? Or was it when you told me you planned to mate with Bienke? Oh! Or was it when you let me leave Ipakethe and didn’t contact me for—” She used her hands to count. “Not one, not two, not three, but four months?”
“I knew the first minute I laid eyes on you.”
Lanta frowned, trying to remember when he’d first seen her.
“That first night. I walked into the dining hall, expecting to make a good impression on the guests. I hoped one of them would be so impressed they would want to stay and rule by my side. But I took one look at you.” He moved her hair from off her face and cradled her jaw in his hands. “An unmoving, beautiful guard, and I knew my plan was in trouble.” He rubbed his fingertips across her skin. “Ancients you’re even more beautiful without the jewels.”
She shook her head from his hands. “S-stop lying to me.”
“As you’ve said, I’ve never lied to you before and I wouldn’t lie to you about this. You’re my true lifemate, Lanta. You and only you.”
“But Bienke—”
“Is a nice person. But she isn’t you.”
“Your vision. Your plan.”
“It took me a while, but I’ve done almost everything that I’ve set out to do.”
“No.” She backed away from him. “No. After abandoning me for months you don’t get to come back into my life. You don’t have that right. Good for you that you got your alliances and treaties and your application. But you cannot expect me to fall at your feet again. You did what you had to do for Ipakethe and your kingdom, none of this has anything to do with me.”
“Every decision I made since the day of the ball was made with you in mind. I’d spent the day arguing with my advisors. They wanted me to continue with the plan to mate with Bienke but I couldn’t do that. Not after knowing you. I planned to seek you out after the ball and ask you to be mine.”
“But you let me leave and afterward, when I tried to contact you, you ignored me.”
“I had to let you leave. It wasn’t safe for you there, not with all the assignation attempts. Someone even hacked into our system and was monitoring the messages. I couldn’t put you at risk. It pained me, but I had to keep secret how I felt about you.”
“You could’ve told me something. I spent all this time thinking that you didn’t care. Thinking that you never wanted to see me again.”
“I didn’t want to risk anyone finding out about you. It was possible for someone to break into my communications and see our exchanges.” He shook his head. “Without knowing who was behind the bombing, and with them still at large, I had to stay far away from you to keep you safe.”
He stepped toward her and she didn’t step away. “I asked Sira to help to broker peace and met with the other Kgosis and offered a treaty. I couldn’t bring you to a kingdom embroiled in a war. I went to Queen Anaiel and Bienke to ask for their recommendations for our Class 5-ii application. I wanted you to be proud of the world you would help me rule. I asked Bienke to help with the tourist attractions, so there would be more off-worlders and you wouldn’t feel out of place on the planet I wanted you to call your own. I did all of this for you, Lanta.”
“For me?” She shook her head. “I don’t have anything to offer you. Look around. I can’t bring anything to your kingdom or you.”
“With you I’ll have companionship. Love. Family. Peace. Everything I’ve ever dreamed of. Please say you’ll come back with me. Be my Kazi, my Queen, my everything.”
All the pain and hurt that had filled her heart broke free. She’d proven to herself she could live without him, but did she want to? No.
“Yes.”