While well-dressed reporters hover around Dara, Janine takes me through the dugout and the holding chamber that leads underground back to the mech base. I’m thankful not to have to talk to reporters. I’m not sure what I’d say about Dara or the program.
As we pass through the stuffy gray tunnel, Dara’s words sink in. If she noticed, have others? Or is Dara just manipulating me so I lose concentration? I glance at Janine, who looks up, not sure whether to talk or let me have quiet time. My eyes tear up at how well she reads me, how close we are. Have I let this go too far? If only I could tell her I’m adopted, like that would fix anything. It won’t.
I stop before we reach the gym. “I wish you wouldn’t pop up at critical times during my fights and then disappear.”
She smiles. “Until today, I wasn’t supposed to be here, remember. It’s just–you zone out like you do in basketball. You need to keep focus no matter what.”
“Who’s the big sister here?”
“You are, Belle. I’ll always look up to you, but during fights you need to focus.” She cups her hand to my ear and whispers, “I know you want to run, but you can’t unless you take me.”
Guilt. “Janine? Think about–”
She places her finger to my lips and leads me through the gray tunnel to the mech gym. I’m not sure what to make of this. I ache from the fight. I want to hurt Dara for threatening us, for using my love for Janine against us.
When we reach the suite off the gym, the door releases, and Janine pulls me inside. I collapse onto the bed. She removes my sweat-soaked fight uniform and applies cream to my bruised and aching muscles. “I told Sam that Dara threatened to kill you.”
I sit up. “You what?”
Janine pushes me down and continues, “I stretched things a little, but seeing how she looked at you today and what she said, not by much.”
“And what did she say?”
“About you and me being lover-sisters.”
I hate that she heard that. I sit up and pull the sheet around me. “Janine, I never should have let us get so close.”
“Stop feeling sorry for yourself. And don’t you dare let Dara tear us apart. Lie down and let me finish.” She pushes me down, removes the sheet, and applies cream.
“She’s right. We are sisters.” Adopted.
“Belle, you’re the only part of my life I could always count on. Mom is gone so much. Even when she’s around, she’s distracted.”
“She loves you very much,” I say.
“I know, Belle. Please don’t push me away. I couldn’t bear it. It’s been hard enough since you joined the mech program.”
I can’t help smiling at her unquestioned love. “We need to step back and–”
“I refuse to pretend I don’t love you. Don’t you think I agonize at night what Mom would say?” She sits next to me on the bed. “Somehow it doesn’t feel wrong. It’s like you’re my sister and not my sister. I don’t want to lose my sister. I don’t want to lose my best friend. I don’t want to lose this terrific girl who at times doesn’t seem like my sister, the one I love. I want it both ways.”
I say nothing. Does she suspect or is she rationalizing? I sense her anguish as a deep ache in my chest. I want to hold her and tell her I’m both. “We need to cool it in public.”
Playfulness returns to her face. “Deep down you don’t think this is wrong, or you wouldn’t do it. You could never hurt me.”
I sit up. “Babe, maybe I’m a selfish bitch thinking of my needs.”
“See, you still call me Babe.”
“Janine, then. Stop this. I’m sorry I’ve let things go this far.”
“I’m not. And don’t stop calling me Babe. I’ll always be your baby sister.”
“It’s time to grow up and stop following me before you get hurt.”
Janine gets up and paces the tiled floor. “Here I’ve been the selfish one, Belle. With all you have going on, I’ve been talking about my needs.” She takes my hands. “What I really need from you more than anything is to concentrate so you won’t get hurt. Can you do that for me?”
Relieved that she’s changed subjects, I can’t stop my tears. As much pain as she’s in, she’s thinking of me, of us. “I’ll be okay, Babe. Dara wanted me to throw the fight today. I couldn’t. I wanted to, but I saw disappointment in your face. I couldn’t fake it.”
“That wasn’t my face, Belle. I’m okay if you lose. Promise you won’t die for me. You don’t get to do that. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you. My heart aches enough watching you fight. Wash out of the program. Just come home in one piece.”
Oh, Janine, how I’ve wronged you by putting too much on your tender shoulders. You’re the mother ripped from my arms and the daughter I must shield from such pain. You’re the sister I can’t have and the best friend I keep deep secrets from. You’re the heart that beats in my chest, what keeps me going in the face of adversity. You’re my first thought in the morning and my last at night. I’ve asked too much of you. What have I left you of yourself?
But now I must ask one more thing.
Unable to leave the base, I take Janine to see Camilla. The tech hooks us up with unmonitored com-link, though I suspect even that isn’t private.
When we connect, I feel questions in Janine’s mind and worry in her heart. As we savor the connection, I feel calmer than I have in days, and more determined.
“Janine?” I use thought transference rather than verbal.
“I’m here, Belle.”
“I wanted a private moment, and everything on base is monitored, maybe even this.”
“Please don’t use this to push me away over what Dara said.” Janine sounds frantic.
“I’m not, Babe. I miss Mom. I hate that I can’t leave base to see her.”
“She’s exhausted, but fine. She stayed home all day and rested so she could see you fight.”
I close my eyes. If there was any other way to help Morgan, I’d stop now. My heart aches for this boy I don’t know. “Babe, tell her the family should be safe. Sam has captured the escapees from Michael’s School.”
“Really? All of them?”
“Listen to me, Babe. Tell her what I tell you.”
“Okay. You don’t have to yell in my head.”
“Tell her my wounds will heal when she and I gather by the Wells.”
I have no idea if Mom will understand my cryptic message or be able to help, but I have to try. I can’t do this alone.
* * *
After shuffling Janine off to school, I prepare myself for the third arena test. For this contest, we fight in teams of three without mech armor against one man, nine teams in all. I’m not ready. At least the meds Janine gave me were stronger than usual, probably Sam’s. I don’t like how Sam draws her in. I’m angry that Janine talked to the commander about Dara, but my sister’s scared. I can’t hate her for that.
Sam lines us up in the gray underground tunnel outside the dugout in our haptic fight uniforms and light arena boots.
Dara grabs me from behind. “Looking forward to tomorrow? I am. I’ll be thinking about it all day. You won’t be able to give up, because all eyes will be on us.”
I take a deep, slow breath. Focus on today. I smile and stand back a row, where I can keep Dara in view.
“Listen up,” Sam says. “Team leaders for today’s test will be as follows.”
She reads off the names of the final eight from the tournament plus Zoe, my second opponent. I think of who I want on my team. Sam chooses. I get Brandy and Vivian from my group. They gather around me. I’m sweating in my fight uniform. I risk my teammates today if I zone out.
Sam paces before us. “No audience today. The purpose of this test is to face a strong opponent without body armor. Even with your three-on-one advantage, don’t be fooled into overconfidence. Your objective is to work together to cuff the man. His objective is to tap your head and you’re out. This is not fight-to-the death. If it were, the tap could signify a fatal blow. Sense your team and your opponent at all times. Failure costs your entire team the program. Stay focused, channel your energy, and recognize opportunities.”
Steel doors open. Sam leads all but Zoe’s team to the lower level of the stands by team so we can watch. Zoe enters the arena and arranges her team. As leader, I should have wisdom for my team. I don’t. The men Sam brings are strong, on steroids, and motivated to take us out. I have no idea what she promised them. Maybe those who win don’t have to face the final fight to the death.
“Let’s watch the fights and see what we can learn,” I say, since that’s what I plan to do.
Brandy turns her attention from me to the arena.
Vivian looks unconvinced. “These guys are huge. All they have to do is come out swinging and–”
“Stop it right there,” I say. “I don’t plan on washing out today.”
Brandy squeezes my hand. “Vivian’s right. We should jump the guy as soon as he comes out.”
“Agreed, but we have to figure how to work together.”
“How about if Vivian and I each grab an arm,” Brandy says, “and you cuff him.”
“He’ll swat us away,” Vivian says, her eyes narrow.
“We each need to prepare to cuff him and be flexible,” I say.
The first man out is my steroid-enhanced redhead, looking bigger than before. I tell myself it’s because we’re close enough to be in the arena. Dara scowls at me from across the way.
Zoe’s team runs toward Morgan, and he toward them. At the last minute, he veers right and thrusts his hand at the head of Zoe’s left flank. Zoe throws herself at his arm, slaps on one side of the cuffs. Morgan brings his left arm around to tap Zoe. Her right flank slaps on a separate cuff and pulls down to prevent the tap. But two separate cuffs don’t count. He swings his arms to throw the recruits off. They hold tight to the cuffs while Zoe’s left flank barrels into his legs, toppling him onto his back. I’m rooting for Morgan.
It’s like pictures in Mom’s library of Gulliver’s Travels, when the little people tie Gulliver down. Morgan thrashes about, trying to get up. Zoe holds on and so does her right flank. They can’t turn him over. Zoe calls her team away to regroup. Morgan gets up and fastens the open ends of the cuffs, so the girls can’t use them. Clever. Go, Red.
Swinging the cuffs, he charges. The girls scatter. Without mech gear, they aren’t fast enough to outrun him. He picks the right flanker. I force myself to look. When he closes in on his target, the other two recruits converge.
The right flanker drops and tackles him. Zoe and the other girl grab his arms and pull them back. When the right flanker joins them, they get the cuffs on his wrists and step back. I’m glad for Zoe and her team yet sad for my redhead.
I watch the next four fights without learning anything that gives me confidence. The only advantages we have against the man/boy are three-on-one and martial arts training. He has training as well as size and strength, yet we don’t lose any recruits in the first five fights.
Margarite goes next. Her team acts tentative, yet I’ve seen her turn defeat into victory.
This gets me thinking. What happens if I lose? Dara wins the tournament by default. They send me to Nashville. Janine would be at the mercy of Dara and others taking advantage of her kind and trusting nature. And Morgan would be stuck here, or dead.
I brush those thoughts away as the man in the arena taps out Chloe. Margarite’s right flanker is a muscular girl who can’t get out of his way after she gets one cuff on.
“Chloe, clear the arena,” the judge announces.
A mech warrior enters the arena to escort Chloe out. She’s fuming that she washed out because of Margarite’s hesitation.
When the man tries to close the cuff, Margarite’s left flanker body-blocks, sending him onto his stomach. She pulls back the cuffed arm. He taps her head with his free hand. Margarite grabs the open cuff and whips it onto his other wrist before he can tap her. He rolls on top.
She gasps for air, but she has him cuffed. Her hesitation forced two good recruits out of the program. Curse you, Margarite. And damn you, Dara, for pulling her along.
Capra’s team wins, as does Dara’s. I’m baffled that I’m last. And pissed when warriors leave the stands. Am I invisible? Is this because I don’t go to Dara’s parties and promote myself among the warriors? Dara exits to the underground tunnel with her team.
I turn to my team. “If we can trip the guy and get him on his belly, then two of us can hold onto his arms while the third cuffs him.”
“Which two?” Vivian asks.
“One of us has to tackle him without getting tapped out. The other two go for the arms. Then the tackler brings the cuffs.”
Brandy smiles. “Let’s do this.”
Bless your enthusiasm. I nod and lead my team into the arena. This is my first time onto the dirt floor in the light boots Sam provided. In the nearly empty stands, I spot Janine’s face. I nod. She nods back. Focus.
I’ve paid attention to the use of doors: never the same one twice. It’s probably so they don’t come in contact while waiting to enter the arena. The last was the middle door. While the order appears random, the middle and left doors have been used three times. I position my team by the right door, praying for the element of surprise. I stand to one side of the steel door with my teammates on the other. Bloodstains mar the gray wall where Dara attacked a man.
When the door creaks open, a husky, light-bearded man emerges, big as a tree. It’s only your imagination, Belle. Focus.
He spots me to his right before noticing the others. When he looks away, I thrust my body into his legs. Vivian hesitates. Brandy jumps on him and turns her head so he can’t tap her out. The man flips over me and lands on his right side. When he tries to get up, Vivian cuffs his left wrist and holds on for dear life.
I crawl out from under him and grab his right arm. I slap on a cuff. He pushes me away and tries to get up. Brandy jumps onto his back. He grunts and rolls flat on his belly. Brandy pulls the two cuffs together and acts confused.
He pulls his arms free and starts to get up. With bile in my throat, I see fear in Vivian’s eyes. Brandy falls away. We’ve lost our advantage. Focus. I’m not going home today.
Grabbing his right wrist, I roll over, back-to-back with the man. I strain to hold his arm twisted behind him and grab the cuff attached to his left wrist with my right hand. With Brandy’s help I yank it back. Vivian jumps up and fastens the cuffs. Huge mistake. I’m chained to the man’s back, pinned. I can’t wiggle free.
Behind me, the massive man tries to tap out at least one of us. When he can’t, he tightens up and strains his muscles, crushes the air from my lungs. I pull up on the cuffed wrists to get air as the buzzer sounds. A mech warrior sprints into the arena.
How stupid. I focused so hard on cuffing the man I didn’t think beyond that, to the consequences. In real combat, I’m dead. The black-shielded mech removes the cuffs and pulls me free.
Face flushed with relief, Vivian helps me to my feet. “We did it.”
Brandy pats my shoulder. “Thanks.”
Sam greets me and drags me toward the tunnel. “You have a death wish?”
Pulling free, I keep up with her. “I refuse to wash out of the program.”
“I have no use for warriors with suicidal thoughts.”
I grab her arm. “I don’t–”
Sam slams me against the gray concrete wall and presses her arm against my throat. I start to pass out.
“Don’t presume I’m one of your sister grunts. Do you believe you’re ready to face Dara?” She lets go.
I slump to the gray concrete floor. I’ve lost any doubts over whether Sam could handle Dara. I stand uneasily. “I’m sorry, Commander. I don’t have a death wish or delusions about fighting Dara. I’m certain she’ll tear me apart, but I will not back down.”
“Even if she injures you so you can’t complete the final arena test?”
I touch my tender neck. “I hope you can put me back together so I can.”
Sam laughs, a deep laugh I haven’t heard before. “Come on, I’ll see to your neck. I won’t apologize. You know grabbing me is inappropriate.”
Maybe so, but an apology would have helped. I hang my head.
There’s no nurse in the infirmary, so Sam gives me an injection of something, and three rainbow pills.
That’s when I realize the corridors are unusually quiet. “Where are the other recruits?”
“I gave them the night off. They’re probably at the plantation.”
My eyes light up. “Then I can go? Home, I mean?”
“Are you that confident about facing Dara?”
My mind spins–Morgan–Dara–what to do? If I don’t survive Dara, I can’t help Morgan. “Will you train me to face Dara?”
“I have a busy night. With only one opponent, you should be able to focus.”
Think fast, Belle. “I want to go home and talk to Janine. Then I’ll return to train.”
* * *
I race my cycle home, careful to avoid speed traps. I know this entire jumbled scheme of breaking those boys out of a mech command center is nuts. If Sam catches me, she’ll go through my emails and calls. If I take off hunting for Mom, it would alert Sam. Damn this tracking device. Janine has one, too. I’m certain of it. I should walk away. Do my fights. Become a mech and protect my family. I can’t.
When I pull into the garage, I’m stunned to see Mom’s car. I enter the great room to a hug from Mama Grace, a wave from Mama Helen, and a scowl from Therese. Some things never change.
“Janine’s upstairs with Sarah,” Mama Grace says.
“And Mom?” Seeing her office door closed, I don’t wait for a reply. I knock and enter.
Mom looks up from behind her desk. Dark gray eyes carry more than their usual sadness. “I got your cryptic message.”
I close the door, lock it, and turn on her harmony music.
Mom puts her finger to her lips and pulls me behind her desk into her spacious closet lit only by a nightlight. She triggers something, and a guttural hum surrounds us. “I thought we were in the clear. Mechs came out of nowhere. They rounded up the boys. I was lucky to get away.”
“I can’t let them kill Morgan, Mom. I have to do something.”
“I figured that’s what you had in mind. This is an elite military base, Belle, under tight surveillance, and with mechs on patrol.”
“I’ve learned a few things about bypassing security,” I say. “I’ve mapped out where Sam holds the men.”
“You’ve been there?”
“When I was in Sam’s command center, I was thinking how I’d escape. It’s in my blood, Mom.”
Her eyes narrow. “You’ve seen the control room? It’s one bit of information we’ve never had before.”
“Sam gave us a tour.” I turn on a flash beam. “The arena has gaps in security. There’s a tunnel on the northeast side, leading toward the Outlands.” Quickly I draw a sketch on a piece of paper. “That’s where she transports the men to keep them away from recruits, the base, and off-screen for anyone in the command center.”
“Interesting.”
“The cams point outward to pick up anyone approaching the base from the side. If you come from the direction of the border, you miss the cams.”
“It’s too dangerous, Belle.”
“I know you’re part of the Underground, Mom. You oppose the governor. You got George to safety. You helped my birth mother. You helped Morgan. I saw you on Sam’s surveillance.”
Mom holds up her hands. “Okay, but we need time to plan.”
“There’s a nurse, Kristina Wells. She might be sympathetic.”
“I pray Sam doesn’t think so. She used to work with Helen at the hospital before Sam recruited her. I was afraid that was the other part of your message.”
“Would she help?” I ask.
“Hard to say. Think–”
“I know. Think of the consequences. But if we do nothing, Morgan and the other men will die. I can’t sit by. If Battani and others want the men gone, then let them go. The arena is barbaric. I can’t kill, Mom. I don’t know what I’ll do come Saturday.”
Mom squeezes my hand. “Then quit and come home.”
“I won’t be coming home if I quit. Mom, I’ve never felt like this before. I need to do this.”
Mom sighs. “I can’t promise anything on such short notice. I won’t be able to approach Nurse Wells until tomorrow.”
“Will you do it?”
“Sam will have the men heavily guarded before the televised fights with the entire place on lockdown. Even if we get them out, we need time and logistics to get them to the border. If they put the televised arena broadcast on hold for lack of men, you can bet all resources will be on hunting them down. Unless we divert Sam’s attention, we’re doomed.”
“That’s not good enough.”
“I’m sorry. There is no way to get the men out before the fight.”
Dig deeper, Sam would say. “If we can’t save them before, what about after?”
“You mean those who survive?”
Focus, Annabelle. “Even though Sam says it’s a fight to the death, some of the men are only injured or unconscious. That’s how I can avoid killing.”
“But most of the men won’t survive.”
“There has to be over 100 men, because there were three for each recruit for the first arena test. Only 25 will fight in the final. Wells can bring the rest to that tunnel, and your friends can escort them to the border.”
“After the fight, some will need medical attention.”
“I’m counting on it. All we need is a distraction. Mom, we can do this. How can you let me know if Wells will help?”
Mom shakes her head. “You’re incorrigible, Belle. Okay, if she shows up after your fight to tend to your unconscious opponent, then she’s on board.”
“Thanks, Mom. You’re the best.” I hug her. “I have to get back to the base.”
“Don’t get your hopes up, Belle. This is a long shot.”