SOMETHING’S IN MY HEART
I was in a deep sleep when my crackberry rang.
It was Friday morning and I was over Jules’ house. He was at work. When I reached for my crackberry, I looked at the caller ID. it was Pop.
“Hey there Pop.”
“Nee, you alright?”
“Yeah, I’m good.”
“Well we haven’t seen you. Miss you baby.”
“Ah Pop, I’ve been missing in action that long?”
“Yep,” he said.
“Well I’m good. You know how new relationships are.”
“Guess y’all getting along there pretty good then. You ain’t got on his nerves yet. I guess.”
We both laughed.
“I don’t want nothing. Me and your mama is doing cool, just wanted to hear your voice.”
I felt missed.
“I’ll be up there Pop, but tomorrow I gotta go to Kalena’s house to do favors for her wedding and we are taking her out.”
“Ok baby. We got her invitation in the mail. I ain’t never seen an invitation that pretty. Did you help them pick that out?”
“Yes, I did,” I said proudly.
The invitation came in a bronze orange envelope. The mailing labels were written with a brown calligraphy pen and the invitation was bronze brown with orange print. There was a ribbon attached to the invitation with two small gold wedding bands.
“I am happy for my other daughter. Todd and Kalena will be a great couple. And I guess Chelsea won’t be next.”
“Naw, she won’t.” I said with disappointment.
“And what’s up with Najah? She’s dating yet?”
“No, she says that she’s on a male break. Just working, churchin’ and hanging out.
“Yeah, well, that’s when her husband just may show up.”
“Yeah, I’m understanding that myself. Maybe my husband just did show up huh, Pop?” I said all giddy.
He didn’t reply right away.
“Well baby, I’ll tell ya like this. Just pay close attention to him.”
I went into defense mode.
“I believe I am. He’s playing his cards right so far, Pop. You met him. You don’t like him?”
“He seemed ok, Nee. Let’s see how it goes. Trust me, I’m ready to walk you down the aisle. Are you over Drew and Jason and James and Peter and Bob, and Harold and William too?”
He was laughing and I was too.
“Pop, stop it. I mean I don’t know if my heart is over Drew, but my mind is. I’m over the playing. I’ve put my shoes up, and I’m ready for you to walk me down the aisle too. You even said the best way to get over someone is to start dating someone else,” I reminded him.
“Yeah that’s right,” he said. “Yeah, ’cause my other daughter is fighting for her right to get married. Is it ‘no’ on prop 8, or ‘yes’?”
“It’s ‘yes’ on 8 if you are against it and ‘no’ on prop 8 if you are for it. Now, if that ain’t nothing but a bunch of confusion. You know she has one of those signs in her window at home?”
“Really?” I asked. “Wow, she gone full throttle. So, Pop, are you ok with her lifestyle?”
“No way, but that’s my daughter and I love her. You can still love the person but hate the sin. It’s not right, period. Your Mama and I are hoping and praying that this goes away. She’s not a lesbian.”
“Well, she’s single, she says, so I guess she won’t bring a date to the wedding.” I said.
“I’m not ready to meet any women of hers. Don’t know if I ever will,” he said.
“She needs our support and, together, we will get through this. You’ve instilled the same things in both of us, so maybe she will, maybe she won’t. I’ll be ok as long as I don’t see any PDA,” I said.
“I’m with you on that baby. Derrick was here. Says he’s going to LA to do a tour?”
“Yeah. Thirteen cities at that. He’s headed to the top!”
“Alright, Derrick! To be young again and living in L.A. Those women are gonna be all over him, and he’s gonna make that money and go crazy.” Pop said.
I started cracking up.
“You know, he ain’t used to nothing. Well, this is what he wanted. Yeah, but what we want may not be what is good for us or what God has in store for us.”
I hated those subliminal messages. They were scary and made me uneasy. So, on that note, it was time to go. I had to make sure I had everything we need to put Kalena’s favors together tomorrow with the girls. I hadn’t seen them in about a month. I couldn’t wait until then.
I was waiting on Jules to get back from work. We were gonna look at places online to see who’s renting. We figured we liked each other, and wanted to move forward in our relationship. At the rate we were going, we’d be married by this time next year, and hopefully we’d have a baby.
Derrick could hold the house down, and if he moved to L.A.—because he’s been saying that for awhile now—I could rent the house out.
Jules was getting off earlier tonight. He said he would pick up some fish from Family Fish on Mission Boulevard and come straight home.
After we ate, we looked at townhouses and apartments from Hayward to Fremont. We decided that we would rent a two—bedroom, two—bathroom, washer and dryer unit, because that was most important to me. I also wanted a two-car garage. He wanted this place in Fremont, and I liked a place we saw in the Hayward Hills.
Fremont? I was not cool on living out there. It was too far. As we ate, his phone kept ringing and he was getting upset, cussing the person out and telling her to stop calling him. Then, he would hang up the phone and the phone would ring again.
I wasn’t sure about this protocol, because I didn’t make it this far with Jason or anyone else, as far as that mattered.
“What would you do if I told you one of my ex—girlfriends was pregnant?”
“Leave you.”
His voice went up.
“You would? Just like that? Man, you cold. Why would you do that if it happened before you?”
“You wouldn’t stick around if it happened to me. You would be out the door in no time. And besides, our relationship is too new to be dealing with something so intense. We gotta deal with the baby and the crazy mama? That’s a lot for me to take so soon, just to be in a relationship with you. Especially if I was willing to give you a baby.”
“Ah baby, that is so sweet.”
He got up from the computer desk and sat on the love seat.
“Come here.”
I did and we made out and things started to heat up instantly, so we continued in the bedroom.
The next morning, I jumped up and went into the living room to turn the stereo on. Michel’le was singing my song. I start singing with her right when the chorus starts.
I was excited about surprising Kalena, plus Jules had a great package. It was huge and he knew exactly what to do with it. I didn’t know big dudes had it like that!!! That was something worth singing about. I wanted to hurry up and get the day going.
We had allocated four hours to do the favors so we wouldn’t be rushing. I went to the kitchen to get some water, and Jules left the junk drawer open. Big as day there was a letter just sitting there waving at me to go over and pick up. So I did, of course. Under it was a card from a Lisa Harris. She lived on Tompkins Avenue in Oakland, zip code 94619. That was off High Street, I thought.
I looked at the post date stamp; it just got here.
Jules had opened it already.
Since it was fresh off the press, I opened it. It was one of those “Between You and I” cards. She was pouring her heart out to Jules; one of those “I hate when we argue” cards. It went on about how she couldn’t wait till they got back to the way they were.
I went into the bedroom and grabbed my crackberry. I scrolled to my memopad app and stored this address.
This was from the chick that was banging on his door the other night. Poor girl.
He gave me the run down when I asked about them. They went to Fremont High together, grew up in the same neighborhood on 55th Avenue, a crazy biotch, but she sucked dick very well.
I put the card down. I wasn’t tripping off her. She’s entitled to her feelings toward Jules. They had history and that was exactly where it ended.
I exhaled.
Then I found, an email he printed from his soon-to-be ex wife, Vantasha.
She should have called and left him a message, because her grammar sucked big time.
I had to spend more time re-reading her sentences over and over, because I had to figure out what she was trying to say. Then when I figured out what she trying to say, I had to read it over to actually read what she was saying.
Ignorant broads, I thought. Nobody has spell-check anymore? She started talking about how hurt she was, how he never stepped to the plate to be the husband that she needed him to be. He still ran the streets, and wasn’t coming home.
Every time she wanted to talk to him, he used to get angry at her, and they would have heated arguments. Then he would leave again.
She began to say how immature he was, how he needs to grow up and stop listening to nothing but rap music, and he needs to stop riding around playing his music so loud. She was also mad about him never taking her on a honeymoon, and she knows love from her father, and it’s nothing to compare to the lack of love he gave her. I was glad that she never mentioned him hitting her or giving her any STDs.
However, he did act like a kid at times, but I thought it was cute. Some women’s expectations rise automatically after marriage, like the guy has more to give after getting married. We argued once and I got mad and didn’t want to talk to him, but he wanted to squash it. He said “let’s talk about this now instead of wasting time being mad.”
Maybe she grew him up for me. How many times had I done that for my ex-boyfriends’ wives? Is this what Pops was talking about when he said “pay attention”?
Wow she was angry. Well, that was last year.
She shined some light on him.
He didn’t seem like the same guy, I was sure taking notes. A man will do what you allow him to do, and I was gonna be well-understood in this relationship. I would not be taking any more bullshit. I’d had it. It would be my way or no way.
Off to the bathroom I went. I had to pick up Chelsea, since she lived in San Leandro. After doing the favors, we were surprising Kalena with a limo and taking her to celebrate her bachelorette party. Kalena’s sister, Ashley, wanted to do something fun and different for her sister. She suggested that we take a pole-dancing class. We found a studio in San Francisco called Sedusa. The place looked nice, and we could dress in a theme and celebrate with cake and drinks after our class.
Carol, the owner of Sedusa, asked us to bring our own cups. I had cups packed with a knife, forks, small paper plates and napkins. Our dress code for the class was a white wife beater and black boy shorts. Jules helped me pick out Kalena’s outfit; we got her a sexy white lingerie outfit with a tiara. It was perfect for her to wear on their honeymoon night. The class could accommodate ten ladies. Chelsea, Najah, Jordyn, Ashley, Kalena, me, and four of Kalena’s cousins were coming. The limo was my idea. Todd wanted to chip in, so he took care of that for us. A white Escalade was picking us up at seven.
First stop was Crustacean, our favorite seafood restaurant. They make the best roasted crab and garlic noodles. Kicking it with the divas couldn’t have come at a better time. I needed a cocktail bad. I haven’t decided if I was gonna say something about the email from the exwife, but I damn sure was gonna tell them about Lisa Harris coming over to introduce herself to me. I laughed in the shower. All I could think of was, WOW!