The squeak of rubber against waxed wood ricocheted off the walls and high ceilings as Reid walked into the YMCA gymnasium. He tossed his bag onto the bleachers and sat to change into his basketball shoes. A hand clapped on his back, and he jerked forward, almost eating his knees. He finished tying his shoe as he wrenched to see who had tried to knock his teeth out.
Brandon stood there, cocky grin in place, looking too tall and broad for a basketball court. He belonged on the much bigger football field. “Pretty absorbed in those shoes. Forget how to tie?”
“Ha-ha.” Reid stood so Brandon didn’t feel so dominating. “How long you been here?”
“Long enough to get us on the list for a court.”
“Thanks. Everyone still coming?”
“David texted that he’s on his way.”
He clapped Brandon on the shoulder. “Good to see you.”
“I know. The game wouldn’t be the same without me. How are you doing?”
“I still feel discombobulated.”
“Probably will for a while. These traumatic events. They take time, and it’s different with each.”
Reid nodded as he let the words slide around him. He didn’t want more psychoanalyzing by a friend. What he needed was the physical outlet of a friendly game that would turn fiercely competitive. In the end he’d be bruised, sore, and, he hoped, ready to sleep soundly for the first time since Kaylene died.
David strode through the door and tossed his duffel on the floor, where it slid into Reid. He pulled Reid over for a quick man hug. “Sorry about your sister and niece.”
“Thanks.” What else could he say? He vaguely remembered David and Ciara attending the service. Much of that day was shadows, nothing concrete and solid. As David stepped aside, Reid saw Ciara coming, toting baby Amber in a carrier thingy that looked like a torture implement for the mom. Then he froze. Beside Ciara, lugging what had to be the mother ship of all diaper bags, was Emilie Wesley.
She wore a flowing top and a pair of skinny jeans that fit just right, and he had to remind his lungs to do their job. She glanced at him and a shy smile tipped her lips. He took a step toward her, but David intercepted him.
“She’s a special friend, Reid.”
“Okay.” It wasn’t like his friend to warn him off. “You know we’ve been on a date, right?”
“Yep, and I’m serious. I’m watching closely. Ciara is very protective of Emilie.”
Reid held up his hands and took a step back. “Noted.”
“I’m so glad you came tonight. You work entirely too hard.”
Ciara’s words circled around Emilie as she set the monstrous bag on a bleacher bench. How much stuff did a two-month-old need? Even in her most must-be-prepared-for-any-situation days in college, her backpack had never been this stuffed. She was scared to unzip the bag and peek in, for fear the slightest movement would cause the contents to explode like a demented jack-in-the-box.
First-time parents.
She couldn’t ignore the joy looking into Amber’s clear blue eyes brought. Recently it felt all she experienced was an overwhelming exhaustion and fear that she couldn’t perform up to some elusive standard she’d set for herself. She was disappointing everyone—herself most of all.
It was a rock that threatened to sink her beneath the waves, and she wasn’t strong enough to swim back to the surface.
“You okay?” Ciara’s words brought her back to the moment, and Emilie forced a smile.
“I’m good.” She glanced around the battered gym. “Why do you come to these again?”
“When you’re married, it means you go to smelly, noisy places because it’s what your husband likes.” She unfastened a couple of the bizarre collection of buckles strapping Amber to her seat. “David likes to show off for me, and it gives him time with his friends when he doesn’t feel he’s cheating us of time.” She shrugged and glanced at Emilie. “It’s a small enough thing.”
Her words conveyed a message that love comprised a series of small sacrifices that built over time to a lasting relationship.
Emilie sensed the wisdom embedded in the words. When would she find the man with whom she could build a lasting love? Ciara had found hers with David. And Hayden looked to be building her happily-ever-after with Andrew. What held her back from finding the man who could love her truly, deeply, and with that everlasting, all-consuming love—but wouldn’t burn into the unbridled need for control, as the women who came to the Haven had experienced?
Emilie wanted to be loved.
She didn’t want to disappear into someone else’s control.
The possibility terrified her.
“You still with us?” Ciara’s words snapped Emilie back to the moment.
“Yeah. Got lost for a second.”
“You could say that.” Ciara shifted the now freed Amber in her arms and then nudged her chin toward the basketball court. “I see you’ve captured the attention of David’s friend Reid.”
Emilie felt heat crawl up her neck. “I’m not looking for attention.”
“So says my friend who is desperate to be loved.”
Ouch. “Who gave you the crystal ball into my soul?”
“God can whisper the truth even through little ole me.”
Emilie’s gaze trailed to the court, where David and Reid had been joined by the hulking guy she’d seen at the funeral and again in the restaurant. He was tall and probably had a hundred pounds on her, but not one was fat. He screamed athlete—a different look from Reid, who wasn’t muscle-bound. Yet Reid had an intelligence and spark that drew her.
There was a flurry of activity at the doorway, and she turned to see another man walk in, flanked by a man and a woman. She recognized him at once. “Does that guy have security?”
Ciara turned from digging through the bottomless bag. “Jordan? It might be overkill, but he must have needed them for something earlier today.”
“Seriously?” The woman never stopped scanning the room as she moved ahead of the men to take a loop of the court. “That’s intense.”
The guys greeted each other, a standoffish vibe coming from the latest entrant, as if he wanted to enter in but couldn’t quite let himself.
“You don’t know who he is?” Humor tinted Ciara’s words.
“Oh yeah, I do. He was at the Haven yesterday, and I met him at a fund-raiser before that. Jordan Westfall, the uber-wealthy former CEO of Interlntell. How does David know him?”
“Jordan’s not a core part of the group, but David grew up near his family.”
As she watched the men team up, Emilie’s gaze kept returning to Reid. “Do they play often?”
“It depends. Jordan is a new addition, but the other three try based on their schedules.”
Brandon and Reid were paired, while David and Jordan hustled back and forth as a team. Jordan was awkward as he moved around the court. Reid kept a steady stream of talk going as they moved. He did a spin move as he went up, and Jordan groaned as the ball danced around the rim before bouncing out.
“You don’t get extra points for style.” David chuckled as he leaned over with his hands on his thighs. “Especially when it doesn’t go in.”
“Let’s take a quick break.” Before waiting to hear what the others said, Jordan stalked to his male bodyguard and returned with bottles of a sports drink for the guys. He sat on the bottom seat of the bleachers, back ramrod straight.
“He doesn’t know how to relax.” Reid’s voice pulled Emilie around. He stood a couple feet away and put up a hand. “I didn’t want to get too close.”
The faint odor emanating from him suggested he was still a little too close, but she didn’t say so. He pulled a hand towel from a navy duffel at his feet and wiped his face and neck. Emilie couldn’t tear her gaze from him and he seemed to know it.
“I didn’t expect to see you here tonight,” he said.
“Would it have changed anything?” The words popped out.
“Quite possibly.” He grinned at her. “I would have worn stronger deodorant.”
The words surprised a laugh from her. “I’m not sure it would matter.”
Brandon walked by and moved toward the court. “Come on, you softies. We ain’t got all night.”
Reid lurched to his feet, then turned toward her. “Go out with me tonight?”
She wrinkled her nose, knowing she should say no but wanting to say yes. “Not without a shower.”
He pulled his sweaty T-shirt from his chest and grinned. “What? This isn’t good enough for you?”
“Umm . . . no.”
“You’re on. One shower in exchange for one date.”
“Coffee.”
“Sure, Em.” He saluted her as he trotted backward to the court.
As she watched him go she couldn’t help wondering what he thought she’d agreed to.
Jordan stopped a few feet from her and waited.
“Hi, Jordan. Nice to see you again.”
“Good to see you. Join me after the game?”
“She just agreed to coffee with Reid.” Ciara jiggled Amber as she watched the two.
“She can speak for herself.”
Emilie puffed out a breath. “I’m sorry, Jordan, but Ciara’s right.”
“Maybe this weekend.”
“Maybe.” She watched him stalk to the court and then turned to Ciara. “What was that?”
“I’m not sure.” She slipped the pacifier into Amber’s mouth and then handed the little bundle to Emilie. “Jordan’s sometimes a little awkward.”
Emilie snuggled the baby closer, suddenly wishing she was anywhere but there. Still, her gaze strayed to the man pulling his sweaty shirt out, revealing carefully sculpted muscles. She could lose herself in that heart-stopping grin of his if she allowed herself.