The next morning, Allie walked down the stairs at six forty-three precisely. Her hair was pulled back snugly in a ponytail that bounced with every step. She looked drawn, but resolute.
When she’d left Carter the night before, she’d gone to the bathroom and splashed cold water on her face. She’d stayed there for some time, staring at herself in the mirror, replaying their conversation in her head.
‘How can anybody think I had something to do with Ruth’s death?’ she’d asked him, aghast. ‘That’s insane. I hardly knew her. Why would I want to hurt her?’
‘It’s a set-up, Allie.’ His face had been grim. ‘They’re also saying that you got Jo drunk up on the roof, and that you’ve got … mental problems.’ She opened her mouth to protest and he held up his hand. ‘Whoever is spreading this stuff knows it’s not true. They’re messing with you.’
‘But why? Why would anybody want to do that?’
‘Some people feel threatened by you.’
‘How am I threatening?’ she asked plaintively. ‘I’m nobody,’
‘I’ve told you before, I don’t think that’s true,’ he said. ‘And neither does anybody else.’
‘I don’t get it.’ She ran her hands through her hair, pressing her fingers hard against her temples. ‘My parents are civil servants. They’re not rich. Most of the people here are millionaires’ kids. How can they be threatened by me?’
‘That’s what we have to find out,’ Carter had said.
After that she couldn’t sleep. Restless, she climbed out of bed at two o’clock and opened the window for fresh air. Then closed it an hour later because she was cold. Once she heard footsteps pass her door, then silence again.
More than once the thought passed through her mind: Could it be Rachel? I trusted her. She’s the only one who knows everything. I didn’t tell anyone else. She loves gossip. But she wouldn’t … Would she?
She thought that perhaps she’d dozed off at around four, but not for long. When the alarm went off at a quarter past six she was wide awake, staring at the ceiling.
And now she had to get through breakfast.
By going down to the dining hall as early as possible on a Saturday, Allie hoped to avoid most people. She and Carter had decided she should go about her day as usual. But she didn’t really want to deal with, for example, Katie Gilmore right now.
When she walked in, nobody seemed to pay any undue attention to her and as she filled her plate with cereal and toast she allowed herself to feel relieved. Maybe this whole rumour thing isn’t going to be a big deal.
She looked around the room for her usual dining companions, but she was so early nobody was there.
‘Hey Allie. Come sit with me.’ Rachel was sitting alone at a table to her right.
For a moment, Allie hesitated, her thoughts from last night swirled queasily. But it would look weird if she didn’t sit with Rachel.
She’s the most gossip-aware person in the school. If she doesn’t mention the rumours about me, I’ll know it’s her.
She made her way over and set her food down. ‘Thought for a second I was going to have to sit by myself.’
‘I’m always here this early,’ Rachel said. ‘My dad kind of beat the whole early riser thing into me when I was little, and now I guess I’m stuck with it. Abusing children is just wrong.’
Rachel had created a toast, egg and cheese sandwich, and as she poured milk into her cereal Allie had to admire how she was systematically demolishing it. ‘Your breakfast looks better than mine,’ she observed.
‘Most important meal of the day, girlfriend,’ Rachel said, chewing. ‘Hey, did you know people are spreading a really sick rumour about you?’
Allie froze, her spoon halfway to her mouth. ‘I’ve heard something about that,’ she said cautiously. ‘I heard it’s something crazy.’
Rachel nodded. ‘The whole “Allie’s a psycho-killer”? That’s the one I heard anyway. I got it from Sharon McInnon, do you know her?’
‘Well,’ Rachel said taking a bite of her sandwich, ‘I told her to go fuck herself.’
A wave of relief washed over Allie. It wasn’t Rachel after all. I knew it wasn’t.
‘How’d she take that?’ she asked.
‘She was OK with it,’ Rachel said. ‘I think she’s used to me telling her that because she’s such a bitch.’
Now they were both giggling, but Allie’s worries wouldn’t let her relax for long.
‘Who’s saying these things, Rachel?’ she asked. ‘They’re such horrible lies – who would do that?’
‘I’ve been trying to figure that out all morning,’ Rachel said, frowning. ‘Don’t worry. I’ll get to the bottom of it.’
She raised her cup of tea. ‘With you on my side, Rachel, they don’t stand a chance.’
But for some reason, Allie still felt uneasy.
As she walked down the hallway after breakfast she was lost in her worried thoughts.
I can trust Rachel now. Right?
She’d nearly made it to the stairs when Katie’s straight-razor voice sliced the normal Saturday morning quiet.
‘Hello Killer! How are you feeling this morning?’
Allie spun around to face her. ‘Fuck off, Katie.’
‘Language.’ The redhead’s perfect lips curved into a vicious smile. ‘We should have known if they let you into the school everything would go to hell.’
Her circle of glossy acolytes giggled around her, whispering to one another while waiting for Allie’s response.
‘What are you talking about, Katie?’ Allie fought to keep her voice steady, despite the anger coursing through her. While she was trying to think of the best way to handle the situation, the overwhelming desire to punch Katie in the face was winning out. Her hands curled into fists.
As her internal battle raged, Katie took a step towards her. ‘I hear you have anger issues,’ her voice was low and malicious. ‘Is that what happened to Ruth, Allie? Did she upset you? Make you angry?’
Allie felt her fist go up before she knew what she was doing, but before it made contact with Katie’s pert nose someone grabbed her from behind and pulled her back so quickly her feet briefly left the ground.
‘Katie, shouldn’t you be bingeing and purging?’ Sylvain’s silken voice asked as Allie struggled in his arms.
Katie stared at him in disbelief. ‘You can’t be serious, Sylvain. What are you doing? Why are you defending the little nobody? What on earth do you see in her?’
Allie had stopped fighting now, but he still held her firmly. The warmth of his body against hers brought back unwelcome memories.
‘I see somebody with more class than you will ever have in your miserable life.’ His clear blue eyes swept her group of friends. ‘And that goes for all of you. Now you can all go on with your business, please.’
After a brief fluttering of indecision, the group began migrating to the dining hall. Katie led the way, her head high.
Only when they were completely out of sight did Sylvain drop his arms and step back.
‘I wish you’d have let me hit her,’ Allie said ungratefully.
‘The thought did cross my mind,’ he said.
‘She’s so horrible. I just … Anyway.’ Allie scuffed at the floor with the toe of her shoe and didn’t meet his eyes. ‘Thanks.’
‘You are welcome. But I am afraid that you will have many problems now. These rumours they are …’ Sylvain swirled his finger around in the air, ‘everywhere. And she will use them against you.’
‘I know,’ Allie said. ‘I just wish I knew who was saying these things.’
He looked at her seriously. ‘When everybody is saying it, I think it no longer matters who said it first. But I believe the first rumours were spread by somebody who is known to be jealous of you.’
Allie glared at the dining room door. ‘Like Katie.’
‘Like Katie,’ he said.
‘Is she behind it all, Sylvain?’
‘I do not know for certain. But it is something I have … heard. I will ask around. And if I find out, I will speak with Isabelle.’
Allie didn’t want to be beholden to him, not after what had happened. But if he could stop this from getting worse …
‘That would be good, Sylvain.’
‘Don’t worry about it. As you British say, I owe you one.’ She flushed but he continued, his accent thickening as he talked. ‘I have to say this, Allie. The night of the ball – I am sorry about how rough … I hurt you, I know. It was wrong of me. You are different from the girls I have been with before. I know that I cannot treat you like them.’
Allie’s cheeks burned, but she faced him squarely. ‘You shouldn’t treat any girl like that, Sylvain. Ever.’
To her astonishment, he lowered his head. ‘You are right. Absolument. Please accept my apology.’
‘I … I’m just … Sylvain, don’t,’ she stuttered. She didn’t want to forgive him. She wanted to stay angry at him. But then a thought occurred to her.
‘I have to know one thing,’ she said. ‘Did you put something in my drink that night?’
He looked horrified, and at that moment she knew the truth.
‘My God. Of course not. What do you think I am?’ he said.
‘I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘I just had to know. Because things all got so blurry.’
‘Cimmeria wine is strong,’ he said. ‘If you’re not used to it and you drink it too fast it will go to your head. And I let you drink too fast, that much is true. And I did try to use that to my advantage. That was wrong of me.’
His humility and apparent honesty left her with no choice.
‘I accept your apology, Sylvain,’ she said. ‘I’m over it.’
Before he could reply, she added, ‘Look, I’m going to run away before anybody else calls me a murderer or apologises for practically date-raping me, OK? I can’t take any more excitement before nine o’clock.’
Just before she turned to run for the stairs, he said, ‘Be careful, Allie.’ His eyes were intense. ‘There is real danger around you at the moment.’
‘Oh good,’ she said wearily. ‘I was hoping you’d say something like that.’
*
Allie would never have used the word, but she hid in her room for much of the morning. By lunchtime, though, she’d finished all of her homework and was looking around for something to do. And she was hungry.
Unable to face another meal in the crowded dining hall, she sneaked down just before most students arrived for lunch and grabbed several sandwiches, packing them away in her book bag with bottles of water and an apple.
But as she walked down the hallway to the front door, a group of younger students passed her and she heard one of them whisper, ‘There’s the murderer’. Some giggled and others gawked at her fearfully.
What could she do? She couldn’t fight them all. So she pretended not to hear, and kept going.
When she walked down the front steps a few seconds later, though, one of Katie’s friends passed her and made a wide circle around her as if she were toxic.
‘Gross,’ the girl said, looking her up and down before hurrying away.
Her chin up, Allie kept going. But the lawn was crowded with students stretched out in the sunshine and she imagined that she could hear whispers and laughter all around her. Before long she was running across the grass and into the tree-line.
Away from them all.
At the summerhouse she stopped to catch her breath. It was completely empty – she could see nobody at all. Sitting on the steps, she dropped her head to her knees and breathed slowly until she calmed down.
Why did this always happen to her? For a brief moment she’d thought she’d found a place where she could just … be. Where she was safe. Where she was almost accepted.
But it was always the same.
Everybody turns on me. Everybody leaves me.
She wanted to cry but she couldn’t. Staring into the trees, she allowed herself to think about Christopher. He hadn’t just gone. First he’d shut her out. Treated her like there was something wrong with her. Like he didn’t love her any more.
Now it was happening again. Only this time it was everyone.
Well. Almost everyone.
She had Carter. And maybe she should trust Rachel. There was something inherently good about her. And at least for now she still had Lisa, too. And maybe even Lucas.
So … she wasn’t alone this time.
After a while, she realised she really was starving. Relishing the peace in the glade by the summerhouse, she spread her blanket on the grass and ate her sandwiches in the warm sunshine – completely alone. No whispers, no laughter, no craziness. Later, she stretched out with her head on her bag. She was asleep within minutes.
When she woke up, the summer sun had moved lower in the sky, and she was now in the fast-cooling shade.
Gathering her things she headed back up to the school building with some reluctance. Her afternoon of peace had been so pleasant, she wasn’t ready to deal with the situation she was in.
Nearing the building she realised it was later than she thought – the lawn was empty of sunbathing students and in the hallway she could hear the buzz from the dining hall. It must be after seven; everyone was at dinner.
Climbing the stairs to her room she felt a pang of hunger, then remembered that she’d thought to set aside a sandwich and some biscuits for dinner.
I won’t have to face anybody until tomorrow morning.
She knew she was being cowardly, but she didn’t care.
As the evening wore on, though, the flaws in her plan became clear. She hadn’t spoken to one person since eight o’clock that morning. She had no television, computer or video games. She’d been reading all day and she’d slept for hours. By eleven-thirty she was sitting on her desk staring out the open window, wide awake and very bored.
Lights had been coming on in dorm rooms around her for the last hour as students returned from the games she’d heard them play on the lawns. Half an hour ago, she’d heard Zelazny’s gruff bellow of ‘Curfew!’ followed by the low rumble of voices and footsteps in the corridor outside her room.
Now, sliding across the desktop to the windowsill, Allie climbed out onto the ledge, less timidly than the last time. Her skirt fluttered against her thighs in the cool evening breeze. Following the path Carter had showed her the previous weekend, she had to pass a few windows to make her way along the ledge to the spot where the roof sloped at a gentle angle, and she could pull herself up. From there, she would make her way safely across the rooftop to the main building. There a similar sloping spot made a natural exit onto a ledge that led past the boys’ windows.
But some students were still up – light poured from the two windows she had to pass before she could make it to the relative safety of the roof.
When she reached the first window she peered cautiously through a corner of the glass. The lights were on, but the room appeared empty and she scuttled past it, exhaling only when she was well beyond it.
The next window was wide open. As she neared it she could hear voices and laughter. Peeking inside she saw three girls talking. One – a pretty girl with olive skin and straight, dark hair that swung just above her shoulders – sat on the bed facing the window. Allie recognised her as one of Katie’s acolytes.
The other two sat on the floor, their backs to her. Even from behind, the familiar short blonde hair made Jo impossible to miss. The girl next to her had a distinctive, vivid auburn ponytail.
Katie.
What is Jo doing hanging out with her? I thought she was still in the infirmary.
Astonished, Allie hung on to the bricks and tried to decide what to do. The girls looked relaxed and they could be planning to talk for hours. There was no way she could pass the window without the girl on the bed seeing her. But she couldn’t pull herself up onto the roof from here. She was trapped.
Her fingers were sore from holding on to the bricks and she was trying to find a way to shift her position on the narrow ledge to get more comfortable, so she wasn’t really paying attention when Katie’s words floated out the open window and it took her a moment for her to realise who she was talking about.
‘… and I think something needs to be done.’ Katie was saying. ‘Isabelle has no right to let somebody like her loose among us. We don’t know anything about her. First Ruth and then … well. She could have killed you up on that roof, Jo. It’s a miracle you survived.’
Wait. What is she saying?
She waited for Jo to tell Katie she was crazy.
‘I used to think she was my friend,’ Jo said. ‘But now I don’t trust her at all. That scene up on the roof was so scary. I could have died.’
I saved your life! Allie glared at the wall in front of her as if she could cut through it with her eyes.
‘Of course you could have,’ Katie said. ‘Just look at what happened to Ruth. It’s no coincidence that Allie didn’t go to get help first. She came up there so she could be alone with you when you were vulnerable. God knows how you survived.’
‘Carter was up there too,’ the acolyte said, sounding surprisingly reasonable.
‘Yes, Carter did help me …’ Jo said uncertainly.
‘But why didn’t he stop her from pushing you off?’ the acolyte asked.
Pushing who off? Nobody was pushed!
‘Because he’s in love with her.’ Katie’s voice rang with contempt but Allie felt her heart skip a beat.
He’s in love with me? She smiled stupidly at the old brickwork in front of her. Really?
‘He’s done here, too,’ Katie finished.
Allie stopped smiling.
‘We should never have accepted him in the first place,’ Katie continued. ‘I’ve never understood Isabelle’s obsession with him. He doesn’t belong here. He’s not legacy any more than she is. Standards are really slipping here. I’m going to tell my father – he needs to intercede.’
Her caustic tone seemed to amuse the acolyte. ‘That should scare Isabelle,’ she giggled.
‘It better. He’s on the board,’ Katie said. ‘And Jo, you need to write to your father too. He’s incredibly influential. Tell him what happened on the roof, how some crazy new girl tried to kill you and Isabelle won’t lift a hand to protect you.’
Allie held her breath, waiting for Jo to tell her this was a stupid idea. That she wouldn’t have anything to do with it. That she knew Allie and she deserved to be here.
‘OK,’ Jo said.
OK? Allie thought, betrayed. OK? You spoiled little …
Someone knocked on the door.
Allie leaned around to peek through the edge of the window. Jules stood in the doorway.
‘Katie, Ismay, can you come with me for a moment? I need to talk with you.’ Jules sounded stern, Allie thought, but Katie just rolled her eyes.
‘Seriously, Jules?’ She stood up and walked past the prefect, her every stride conveying irritation. ‘This is so boring.’
I wonder what that’s about? Allie thought, watching them go.
The acolyte, who Allie now knew must be Ismay, was right on her heels. Jo trailed behind them.
Though she was overwhelmed with the desire to throw herself into the room and demand an explanation from her ex-best friend, Allie waited right where she was. As soon as they were out of sight she shot past the window like a Fury. A few seconds later she was climbing across the roof to the main building and then skidding down the slope to Carter’s open window.
He was sitting at his desk working, and he didn’t notice her right away.
She studied his face – taking in his fair skin and slightly mussed straight dark hair. The way his long lashes cast feathery shadows against his cheeks. She liked his hands – his fingers were long but strong; his nails square and neat.
She felt an unexpected warmth spread through her as she watched him.
He really is lovely …
As if he’d heard her thoughts, Carter looked up and their eyes met.
With a startled cry he leaped from his chair so quickly it fell over. Allie tried not to giggle out loud as he slowly returned to his desk and peered out the window.
‘Allie?’ He looked embarrassed and cross, although she thought the latter was probably just to hide the former. ‘What the hell …?’
‘Hi,’ she whispered. ‘I can’t sleep. Want to come out and play?’
He opened the window. ‘You’re mad. Get inside before you kill yourself.’
‘Katie is such a bitch,’ she complained as she clambered across his desk.
Carter raised his eyebrows. ‘No argument.’
‘You don’t understand.’ Allie paced the floor. ‘I heard her talking through a window. She’s trying to “finish us” and she hates us both and she’s planting awful thoughts in Jo’s head about me – that I tried to kill her on the roof. I think she’s behind these horrible rumours about Ruth.’
As she ranted, he closed the window behind her, then picked the wooden chair up off the floor and propped it under the handle of his bedroom door, testing it for stability.
Finally he turned back to her. ‘What exactly did you hear?’
She told him what had happened that morning – with Katie and her friends, and how Rachel had known all about the gossip by seven in the morning. His eyes narrowed when she mentioned Sylvain’s intervention, but he said nothing. As she told him about what had transpired in Katie’s room his face darkened. She could see he was trying to stay calm.
‘OK, so there are two possibilities,’ he said. ‘Either she didn’t spread the first rumour and she’s just taking advantage of it to spread more rumours about you and Jo, or she did spread the first rumour and this new rumour is just part of her evil plan.’ He punched his right fist into his left palm. ‘That socialite bitch.’
‘What should we do?’ Allie asked. Then for the first time she paid attention to where she was. ‘And why is your room bigger than mine?’
He had two bookshelves to her one, and space for an extra chair in the corner. While the walls were whitewashed like hers, all the fabrics in the room were dark blue, giving it a more masculine feel. Allie noticed that all of his shelves were filled with well-thumbed books. And that a battered football rested on the seat of the spare chair. She pointed at the neatly made bed and he nodded. She sat down and stretched out her legs.
‘I’ve been here longer,’ Carter said absently.
He pulled out the desk chair and sat across from her. ‘These rumours are intended to cause the most damage possible, even to get you to leave the school. This feels like a campaign to me. To get rid of you.’
Allie slid forward on the bed until her knees nearly touched his.
‘OK, Carter. Enough with secrecy, and all that bollocks. It’s time. Tell me about this place.’
‘Allie …’
He leaned away from her, but she ignored the warning look he gave her.
‘Uh-uh. Not this time. Someone died. And somebody else is trying to ruin my life here. For all I know, whoever killed Ruth could go after me next. You know things. You are allegedly my friend. So tell me everything. Now.’
He walked across the room and stood against the wall, his previously relaxed posture now tight insecurity, his arms crossed.
‘You don’t understand, Allie. I can’t. If I did – and if anybody ever found out …’ He shook his head. ‘It’s just bad. Trust me.’
‘How can I trust you if you won’t tell me the truth?’ she asked. Under her breath she muttered, ‘Maybe I should just go and ask Sylvain …’
Carter’s cheeks reddened. He stalked back over to where she sat and leaned over her. ‘Do you want to know what you mean to Sylvain? Well I’ll tell you. Every year he picks a pretty new first-year girl, shags her and dumps her. It’s his thing. And each one thinks she’s so special. The last one left school afterwards because everybody was making fun of her. But when her parents withdrew their offer of a generous donation to Cimmeria Isabelle warned him never again.’ He spat the words out at her as if it sickened him to say them. ‘So, that’s who you are to him, Allie. His newest, naive conquest. Who thinks the gorgeous rich boy chose her. Just her.’
‘Stop it!’ Allie shoved him away and jumped to her feet. She and Sylvain had just made up, and he’d seemed so sincere.
‘If that’s true, why didn’t you tell me before, Carter?’
They stood inches from each other, both furious. She could feel his breath against her face.
‘I tried,’ he said. ‘I just … didn’t think you’d believe me.’
But she wasn’t letting him off that easily.
‘From what I hear, you’re a bit of a lady-killer yourself. How is what Sylvain does any different from you?’
He winced but didn’t look away. ‘The difference is, Sylvain does it to be mean. I don’t want to hurt anybody. I’m just looking for the right person.’
‘People say you’re into one-night stands,’ she said accusingly.
‘Are these the same people who say you killed Ruth?’
She hadn’t thought of that.
‘Point taken,’ she conceded. ‘So, you tell me. Is what they say about you a lie?’
His eyes locked on hers. ‘Yes, Allie. It’s a lie. Or at least an exaggeration. I got this … I guess, reputation … because if I go out with someone and I can tell they’re not the right one for me I break up with them straight away. And they’re never the right person.’ His eyes seemed to hide nothing from her – she saw only vulnerability. ‘I don’t want to hurt anybody, Allie. I really don’t. I just want the right girl.’
Standing so close to him she fancied she could feel the warmth of his body crossing the space between them, and without really knowing why she was doing it, she held her hand up, her palm facing him, her fingers spread.
‘OK. I believe you. I’m sorry.’
He pressed his palm against hers. ‘Thank you,’ he said softly.
‘For what?’
‘For believing.’
He glanced at their hands quizzically. ‘Is this some sort of London thing?’
As Allie laughed he entwined his fingers with hers. Instantly she felt goosebumps.
‘You big city kids have all these crazy traditions,’ he said.
‘Yeah,’ she whispered, her throat tightening. ‘You country kids don’t know what you’re missing.’
‘I’ve heard that. And, you know, someday,’ he pulled on her hand until she took a step towards him, ‘I’d really like to find out.’
Their faces were so close now it was inevitable – when he brushed his lips very lightly against hers she gave a little gasp then reached her hands behind his neck and pulled his head down.
The warmth of his mouth exhilarated her as, with a groan of surrender, he wrapped his arms around her, his lips moving in delicate butterfly kisses along her chin.
‘I’ve wanted to do this,’ he whispered in her ear, ‘for so long.’
Her entire body tingled and she pulled him harder against her. Heat spread through her body. His kisses were more insistent now, as if he would devour her.
Suddenly he wrenched himself away with obvious effort, walking as far away from her as he could get within the room’s limited boundaries. He stood against the far wall, his eyes dark and his hair rumpled where her fingers had tangled it.
He was breathing heavily and she knew what he’d say before he spoke. ‘God I hate to do the grown-up thing, but we should …’
‘No, you’re right.’ They stared at each other for a moment. ‘OK,’ she said. ‘So. There’s that.’
‘Yes. There’s absolutely that.’ Carter laughed – a warm, intimate chuckle. ‘You just … stay over there for a minute, if that’s OK. Now, what were we talking about before we were so … interrupted?’
His smile had almost as strong an impact on her body as his kiss – she felt like she was the only girl in the universe. It was hard to focus on his words.
‘I was … I think I was asking you to tell me everything,’ she said.
His smile faded. She was sorry to see it go but the conversation needed to happen.
‘There are reasons why I haven’t told you everything, Allie. It’s not just that I’m a wanker who wants to keep things from you.’
‘I get that.’ They were calmer now, and she felt like he was really listening. ‘But I think I need to know where I am. What this school is about. People are getting hurt. I don’t want to get hurt, Carter.’
He looked troubled. ‘If I tell you, I’m breaking a vow. I keep my word. It’s the one thing you can say about me.’
‘But aren’t you starting to wonder just who you made a vow to?’ Allie asked. ‘Tell me, Carter. Tell me about Night School. And I swear I will never tell another living soul.’
Carter’s eyes searched her face as if he were looking for a sign telling him the right thing to do. Finally he sat down in the chair, gesturing at the bed.
‘You may as well sit down,’ he sighed. ‘This could take some time.’