It was pouring rain when Diana reluctantly crawled out of bed on her wedding day. She looked out the window and grimaced. Although she admitted to herself that she loved Trace, she didn’t know if she trusted him. Oh, he wanted her. Of that she had no doubt. But love didn’t enter into the equation. It was all about power, control, and sex for him. Could she learn to live with that? Would her love be enough to keep the weak thread of their relationship from breaking? She padded to the sitting room off from her bedroom and saw that Rosa had already brought her a tray with a pot of coffee, toast, and fruit. She decided on a slice of dry toast to help settle her stomach. Because of the stress between her and Trace and her doubts about what happened between him and Lisa, they had come to an uncomfortable truce, each careful of what they said to the other. He was angry that she didn’t fully believe him and she was sad that she couldn’t. The old feeling of unworthiness rose up in her. She never had been able to understand why he had chosen her out of all the women he could have had. God, how she hated being in a state of uncertainty. She walked back to the bedroom and stood at the window. She nibbled the toast, lost in thought as the rain bounced heavily against the window.
* * *
Trace stood at the window in his penthouse apartment. He wondered what Diana was doing. Had her night been as sleepless as his? He thought about their last confrontation. He’d told Diana the truth about Lisa being in his bed, but she didn’t believe him. At first he hadn’t wanted to explain what happened. He’d wanted Diana to accept what he said at face value. He shouldn’t have to explain himself. When he had come out of the shower and found Lisa sprawled naked on his bed, Trace had been furious. He wanted to wring her neck. If her family and his weren’t friends and business partners, he would’ve pulled out of the joint venture to build a resort in Sydney, Australia. He hadn’t wanted his anger to ruin the deal. And he’d never let his personal feelings overrule his business sense. Learning that Lisa had purposely lied to Diana made him angrier. Lisa loved to play games. He would deal with Lisa, but first he had to smooth things over with Diana. He’d followed Dominic’s suggestion and spent the night at the penthouse. He was glad he had. He needed to think, to collect himself. He ran a hand through his hair and stared unseeingly out of the window at the heavy rain. He hadn’t planned on pushing Diana into marrying him, but everything seemed to snowball out of his control. Yes, he wanted Diana…more than he thought possible. Hell, who was he kidding? He needed her. When he saw her for the first time after five years, he’d expected to feel detached, but he hadn’t. He’d felt anticipation that had gone beyond the mere physical. Damn! He loved Diana. To be honest he’d never stopped loving her. There, he admitted it to himself. Granted he used his son to get her to the altar, but would it be enough to keep her? He wanted them both desperately. He finally held within his grasp what he’d wanted all of his life…Diana and a son. He had what he secretly craved—a real family—his family.
* * *
That afternoon, Diana married Trace in a simple ceremony at the small chapel on the grounds of Raven’s Nest. Susan was her maid of honor. Nicky, looking cute in his little black suit, stood beside his father as a junior best man. Rosa and Henderson also attended. Having Henderson there made her feel connected to her father.
The only family Trace had in attendance was Dominic, who was his best man. He had flown in from Europe the night before and stayed at the penthouse with Trace. Crispina didn’t attend. When Diana had asked Trace about her, he’d gruffly commented she wasn’t invited. Not that Diana cared. She was happy she didn’t have to look at her face on her wedding day.
As for her parents, she’d decided not to tell them about the wedding until afterward. She didn’t want them to ask questions she didn’t have the strength to answer. If they did, she was afraid she would break down in tears. It was a blessed relief not to have to put on a brave face in front of everyone, Diana told herself while she dressed. She frowned at Susan as she fluttered around as if the wedding were the event of the year. Good, let her project the happiness she couldn’t find.
Dominic had spoken to her briefly the night before, saying she was doing the right thing, which only made Diana more anxious. She had mixed feelings when it came to Trace. One moment was wanted him with everything in her, consequences be damned. Then the next moment the pain his callous actions caused would bring her back to reality.
After the brief ceremony was over, Trace spoke to the minister. Susan stood talking to Rosa and Henderson; Dominic came to stand beside Diana.
She turned to him. “I appreciate you coming, Dominic.” She gave him a small smile. She was finding it difficult. Lack of sleep had made her uptight and nervous. To be specific, she was nervous about what was ahead for the night.
He wrapped her in his arms and hugged her tight. “I wouldn’t have missed it for anything. Besides, it’s the best I can do for my favorite cousin.” His eyes scrutinized her. “Are you okay, Diana?”
“Of course. Don’t I look okay?”
“To be honest, you look lovely but tired.”
“Thank you, my friend.”
“You know what I mean. If you allow it, you and Trace can have a happy marriage,” he said.
She took a deep breath. Today was her wedding day. She should at least be honest with herself and acknowledge the fact she was where she wanted to be…with Trace. But one thing was for certain—her feelings for Trace were completely out of the realm of her experience. She loved him, but she could never tell him. She didn’t want to get hurt. She was in a dilemma. And it didn’t stop the pain from increasing.
Since he was a friend to both, Diana thought he wanted to see more than what was there. “Trace and I have some things to sort out,” Diana conceded. “And I know it’s not going to be easy.”
“He loves you, Diana.”
Diana stiffened. “What gives you that idea?” He had certainly lost his mind. “We haven’t left the church yet for the reception, and I didn’t notice that you were drunk when you came in.”
Dominic laughed. “No, I haven’t had a single drink.” He stopped laughing and stared at her unblinkingly. “Trace has always loved you.”
Diana frowned. “You’re mistaken.”
“I don’t believe I am.” He paused. “No, I’m going to say that without a doubt I know Trace loves you.”
“Dominic, I know you want Trace and me to have this fairy tale marriage, but it’s not going to happen.”
“Trace is a good man.”
“But his relationships never last.”
“This is different, Diana. You’re his wife. You and Nicky are the most important people in the world to him.”
Diana dropped her gaze. “I know. But I’m cautious—”
“Please, just give him a chance. Will you promise me that?”
She smiled weakly. “I can only promise to try. I can’t promise more than that.”
“Okay. That’s all I’m asking.” He hugged her again and changed the subject.
* * *
It had stopped raining by the time they went back to the mansion dining room for the reception. The minister left after offering his congratulations and prayers. It was late evening and Nicky was a little restless. Susan was taking him home with her for the night so Diana and Trace could have an uninterrupted wedding night. Trace held Nicky in his lap while he talked to Dominic. Happy to be in his father’s arms, Nicky looked at him adoringly.
Finally, Luca came to retrieve him so she could prepare him to leave with Susan. Diana watched the scene unfold before her. Trace lightly kissed Nicky’s head, quietly whispering something in his ear. Nicky smiled up at him and hopped off his father’s lap. Whatever he said to Nicky put a skip in his step. He left the room without once glancing at his mother. Watching the scene, Diana closed her eyes to cover tears that sprang up without warning. Trace had her son’s love and, it seemed, also his devotion.
Though the chef had prepared a scrumptious meal, Diana ate only a spear of asparagus. She was afraid if she tried the delicate shrimp or roasted chicken she wouldn’t be able to swallow.
After dinner and wishing them much happiness, Rosa and Henderson excused themselves and went to their private quarters. Diana stood next to Susan beside a small table of assorted desserts and slices of fruit; Diana picked a lemon square, took a nibble and chewed slowly. Her nerves already on edge, she attempted to put something in her stomach to quiet the queasiness.
“You look beautiful, Diana,” Susan said. “The ceremony was short and sweet.” She looked through the doors to the terrace where Trace and Dominic stood talking. “Trace reminds me so much of my Tony, God rest his soul. Handsome. Gorgeous. Once you get past the wall of detachment that is inherent in strong and powerful men, I believe he will make a wonderful husband.”
Sudden despair wrapped around Diana’s heart. She wasn’t sure Trace would be a good husband; only time would tell. However, she did believe he would be a good father.
“Mercy, your face is ashen,” Susan exclaimed. She touched Diana’s forehead. “Are you feeling sick? Why don’t you go and lie down? I’m sure Trace would understand.”
“I’m fine. Just a little tired.”
“It’s certainly understandable. It has been an exciting day.”
Diana appreciated her kindness, but there was so much going on in her mind. Part of her wanted to blurt out everything, but the time wasn’t right.
Just then, the men returned. Trace looked magnificent in a dark suit and white shirt. He was talking in low tones to Dominic. By the expression on his face, the conversation was serious. He was so striking that her heart thudded against her ribs.
When he saw her staring at him, he paused briefly. Then his mouth tilted in a sardonic grin.
“I hope you aren’t plying my wife with too much alcohol,” he said, walking toward them.
Susan gave a light laugh. “Of course not. Only girl talk.”
“I have something much better.” He grabbed a bottle of champagne and filled four glasses. He handed a glass to each of them.
Despite his relaxed air, those piercing eyes studied her thoughtfully for a moment, giving nothing away.
He held up his glass. “A toast. To my lovely bride.”
Somehow she managed to raise her own glass and smile.