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Eros is not the bomb during emergencies. He berates me for letting myself get hurt, but then he pulls me in an invisible embrace so tight my ribs threaten to crack. When he whisks me back into his mist-hidden cabin, and he sees me turn a little green, he tells me I deserve it...but a second later, he's also pressing his hand against my stomach, and my nausea disappears like a forgotten bad dream.
The rest of the Erotes materialize into view just as Eros is threatening to have me expelled from Rosethorne if I display this kind of idiocy again, but then he sweeps me up in his unseen arms and the other gods start to smirk as they "hear" him growling in my mind about handcuffing me to him for eternity.
It's Eros like I've never experienced before, and I'm not sure whether I should feel cherished or concerned. He's normally cool as hell, but now he's turned into a god completely shorn of composure, and I'm wondering if perhaps he's momentarily lost his divine mind?
Stand still.
The god gently lowers me to my feet once we're inside his bedroom, which now feels a little crowded with his tall, dark and deadly brothers also taking up space.
I'm going to heal—-
I quickly jump back and clench my teeth as several parts of my body protest at the sudden movement. I don't want the god to know I'm hurt, but apparently—-
Stop hurting yourself, dammit!
He already knows, and since I still can't see him, all I can do is hurriedly cover my painfully broken nose before he can heal it with his touch. "It might compromise the investigation—-" I break off when I see Erma shake his head, but it's Himeros who takes over to explain.
"Rosethorne is under divine jurisdiction," he says gently. "There will be no investigation, but we will reveal what is necessary to reveal for justice to be delivered."
A part of me realizes I should have expected this, and while that part of me also knows it's better this way for everyone—-
I just feel overwhelmed all of a sudden, and I don't even realize I've started to sway on my feet until I'm suddenly back in the god's arms, and I sense the pain in his voice as his words unroll in my mind.
Let me heal you now, moraki mou.
Please.
My heart wrenches with sudden guilt. I've been so lost in my own thoughts that I failed to realize how I'm not the only one hurting from my injuries, and I've barely started to nod when I feel the god's feather-soft touch all over my body.
Mere seconds are all it takes, and I throw myself at him as soon as he's done. "Thank you," I whisper.
You're not out of the woods yet, little bird.
Both the grimness of his tone and his words come as a surprise to me, but before I can even ask, the god has already magicked me into his bed, and I find myself being tucked under the covers.
"Uh..."
Erma walks up to me and gives my hand several comforting pats. "Just let big brother work this out of his system. You're the first human he's spent a considerable length of time with," he explains, "and you've just given him his first big scare—-" Erma breaks off as invisible fingers snatch my hand out of his hold, and I see all three of Eros' brothers snickering when my hand is tucked under the covers...which are afterwards pulled all the way up to my neck.
Anteros shakes his head with barely-concealed amusement. "You do remember you've just healed her, don't you?"
That only shows how little you understand how frail humans are.
She bruises easily, and her bones—-
While Eros rattles on with a list of my mortal deficiencies, Erma bends down to whisper in my ear, "Be patient with him, little sister. This is his divine way of fussing—-"
I am NOT fucking fussing!
But I think he is actually, and the way his brothers are smirking tell me they think so, too.
GROWL!
It's Eros, turning back into a beast just so he can roar his anger at us, and this time I can only join in everyone's laughter. Fussing is such a human thing, and so for a god - and especially a primordial god like Eros - to do such a thing with me...
A helpless smile curves over my lips as I turn to the beast, and when it moves close to the side of my bed, I eagerly throw away the covers so I can sit up and snuggle against its massive furry body.
He feels so warm and sturdy, and as I close my eyes with a little sigh, I hear the other gods start snickering again.
Huh?
My eyes fly open, and Anteros says dryly, "Only you can make a beast like that look more cuddly than ferocious."
His words have my gaze flying back to the beast, and I hastily bite back a smile. Even with its scary leonine features, the long-suffering expression it wears is unmistakable, and all I can do is fight to keep my face straight as I flash a peace sign in response. "Uh...sorry?"
Your sincerity takes my breath away, moraki mou.
The other gods laugh, and my resolve crumples as I give in to a fit of giggles.
You should rest, you know.
I shake my head. Everything's still too fresh, even if we don't speak about it.
The whole room falls silent, and it's then I realize that the other gods have been listening in the entire time.
"Are you willing to speak about it?" The question comes from Erma, whose unusually sober expression is enough to make me nod without hesitation. And from there, we decide to start piecing things together, beginning with the toxin Cen tried to use to paralyze me.
"I knew I was poisoned even if the test results said otherwise so I decided to take matters into my own hands. I forged my parents' signatures to withdraw my college fund, and I used it to consult with one of Sekret's top priestesses."
Anteros looks at me with approval. "For one who knows so little of the gods, that was a remarkably good move of yours."
"I was desperate," I admit. "It was the first time I've spent days researching about gods. Although I've never voiced it out loud, I kinda knew...in the back of my mind, I had this niggling doubt that magic might've been involved, and when I think of how my parents' deaths were fated...it made me paranoid. I didn't want to be put in a situation where I could be magically drugged or poisoned again."
"Most people's research would have taken them to one of our own," Erma points out curiously. "Aesculapius. Hygeia. Or even Apollo. Why did you choose a priestess serving one of the Egyptian deities?"
A wry smile touches my lips. "I calculated the odds, and since the probability of someone from the Egyptian divine getting involved in my case turned out to be extremely low, I thought I'd take my chances with them."
"And what did your consultation yield exactly?" Anteros presses.
"The priestess gave me an ancient recipe used by royalty—-"
The beast cuts me off with a low growl as he snarls out in my mind—-
MITHRIDATISM.
The anger in its tone makes me feel a little defensive. "No risk, no gain—-"
Another growl cuts me off, and another furious rush of Eros' words roll out for me to read.
Poisoning one's self is not a risk! It is complete stupidity!
A single mistake—-
"But I didn't make any mistakes," I can't help protesting. "And more importantly, the recipe she gave me is a one-size-fits-all thing that can work as an antidote for every type of divine poison—-"
Erma catches my eye, then slowly draws a line parallel to his neck. I'm dead, in other words, if I keep arguing my case like this, and when I look at the beast and see the simmering rage in its gold-and-blue gaze—-
Shit.
With the mood Eros is in, and in light of Erma's words about this being my god's first major scare, I decide to take his baby brother's advice and immediately change gears by reaching up to place a hand on the beast's cheek.
"Stop being mad...please?"
Several beats of silence pass before the beast slowly turns its head to nuzzle my palm.
I apologize for losing my temper.
The truth is, I am angry at myself, moraki mou.
If only I had reached out to you from the very start,
you would not have had the need to poison yourself.
My heart squeezes at the heaviness I sense in his words, and because I don't want the god to keep dwelling on the past, I determinedly change the subject and tell them we still have a lot of ground to cover.
"Cen was the classic narcissistic villain," I tell them with a grimace. "She couldn't resist bragging about all the things she's done, and..." I can feel my forehead wrinkling as I recall some of the more puzzling things the other girl revealed in her diabolical monologue. "I didn't know someone who's only one-third divine can shapeshift..."
"The most powerful ones can," Himeros acknowledges quietly, "but they're more the exception than the norm."
"And she shapeshifted into a human male—-"
Do you remember your lesson about kindred animals?
I look at the beast in confusion. "How do you know—-"
I...may have checked on you once or twice.
"You mean spied, right?"
If I ever catch you spying on me, I will let you off if you let me off now.
Oh, he's good.
"Deal." I feel like I've sold my soul to the devil with that, especially with the way even the angelic Himeros' eyes are twinkling at me, but whatever. It is a good deal, so...I'm just going to pretend Anteros isn't smirking and Erma isn't looking at me in disapproval.
"Anyway..." I clear my throat meaningfully. "What's that about kindred animals you're saying?"
Frogs have the ability to change their sex.
My brows fly up to my hairline. I did not know about that, obviously, but now that I do, it totally makes sense. Professor Lucious was very clear about a kindred animal's primary traits carrying over to the individual's human form. It just never occurred to me that sex-changing can be one of those traits.
"She also mentioned finding out about my relationship with you," I relay pensively. "But she never said how..."
It likely has to do with what happened in the dream world.
Since she also has divine blood,
she would have sensed the moment we broke the lock on your memories.
"Only a full-blooded god could have done such a thing," Erma adds, "and since she was already in Vermont when you recovered your memories, it was only a matter of time before she started hearing talk about your relationship with Eros."
"I guess secret societies aren't so secret, after all."
"Not around here at least," Anteros says with a shrug.
And that's something you should be thankful of,
since it is how I found out about you.
"How did you know?" It's something I've actually forgotten to ask, with all the things that happened in the past hour or so.
Patrick, your driver, was a member of our order.
He had the foresight to inform us of what's happening,
and we came back as fast as we could when we read his message.
I'm unable to answer, my throat tight, and my heart in tatters yet again. Patrick. The man's name was Patrick. I never even got around to asking what his name is. I was so caught up with thoughts of my own shit that I never took the time to ask his name, and—-
Stop blaming yourself, moraki mou.
Tears rush down my face, and I only realize that the god has changed back to his other invisible form when I feel his strong arms wrap around me. I shake my head and try to pull away, not wanting his brothers to see me breaking down, but my god gently draws me back.
It's alright. My brothers are gone.
It's only the two of us.
And apparently, that's all I need to hear, and I find myself sobbing hard against his chest.
"I n-never even got to ask his name, and he died because of me."
You have every right to mourn and grieve his passing, but make no mistake—-
It was Cenchreis, and not you, who killed him.
"But I think I could've still done something," I say jerkily, "and that's what I can't forgive myself for." A choked sob slips past my lips, and my fists clench against the urge to punch something. "Patrick was still a-alive when Cen said she's never seen the man with red eyes. He was still alive! And when Cen said those words, I knew she was lying, but I didn't do a thing, didn't even try warning Patrick because I wanted to see what she was planning, and...it was a mistake. I misjudged her. Misjudged myself and the whole fucking thing, and Patrick was the one who paid the price—-"
Eros cups my face, and the warmth of his touch just makes my tears fall faster.
If you insist on blaming yourself for his death,
then I can only blame myself for leaving you.
Is that how you wish things to be?
It's impossible not to see his point, and I slowly shake my head.
We will find a way to make amends and honor his passing.
You have my word.
My mind tells me it's the best we can do, but my heart disagrees. A part of me will always blame myself for everyone that Cen has killed. But because I also know Eros isn't lying when he says he'll also hold himself accountable every time he sees me in pain—-
I close my eyes and lift my head, knowing that he'll understand what I'm asking even without the words.
And so he does.
His lips brush against mine as he gently urges me to lie back, and a gasp slips past my lips when I feel his hands run down the length of my body. I'm naked in a blink, and when he moves on top of me, the muscular body that presses against my own is just as bare.
My lips part under his as I wrap my arms around his neck, and although the kiss starts soft and tender, it gets a little harder and wilder with every mating stroke of our tongues. Deeper and faster with every catch of our breath. Any attempt at control fades, and need completely takes over as the sound of our pants fill the room.
Our bodies rock against each other, closer and closer, but it's just not enough, and I can't help rubbing my breasts against his chest and grinding my soft core against his already-engorged cock. I want more. I need more. And just as I start to writhe, he enters me without warning, his thick, long cock plowing into my most intimate depths.
And it's just like before.
Every pulsating inch of his erection fills me, and there's just not the smallest space in my core that his arousal hasn't claimed. Being stuffed is a phrase that used to mean something simple and benign, but after sex with my god—-
This is all I can think about.
The moist and sensitive walls of my vagina quivering as they stretch to accommodate his massive and rigid cock-—
This is what it means to be stuffed.
And when he starts to move, oh sweet Greek shit—-
I feel like I'm committing a sin as all thoughts flee, and my hands helplessly roam his muscular chest. I feel like I'm asking for heaven's punishment when my body arches up as Eros starts pounding into me, and my legs snake restlessly around his .
The part of me that's still lost in grief and guilt - it's telling me this is wrong.
But it's too late.
My mind has long ceased to function, and I've become a slave to the burgeoning heat of his passion. When the god suddenly turns me around and pulls me up on all fours, I don't even question it - all I can do is moan and shudder as he thrusts back into me from behind.
Fear skitters down my spine even as my body tingles with anticipation when I feel Eros grab hold of my hair. He's never taken me like this before, but when he pulls out and slams back into me again, our new positions allowing his shaft to penetrate me far, far deeper than he used to—-
"Kyriooooos."
I cry the word out over and over as he shoves in and out of me while gripping my hair. He's fucking me like an animal, and although I know it doesn't sound right - I realize this is exactly what we both need.
It has to be this raw. This savage. It has to be the two of us rutting rather than making love because only this will make both of us forget the things we feel guilty and blame ourselves for.
This alone can remind us that at the end of the day—-
This is what matters.
Him and me.
Together.
For better or for worse.
And so I close my eyes and just let go.
My hips start moving on its own as I strive to meet his thrusts, and his balls begin to slap more loudly against my ass. I no longer make any attempt to control the way my breasts jiggle and sway in the air, and it fucking pay dividends as I hear - I literally hear Eros groan just before he reaches forward to cup my breast with his free hand.
He squeezes my flesh hard, and I moan, loving the pain and pleasure of his touch. He pinches my nipples, and when my hips buck wildly against his groin, the hand gripping my hair tightens—-
And then he's twisting my head to the side, and just as his tongue dives inside my mouth, his cock starts ramming into me—-
Just short, rapid-fire thrusts—-
And it's so, so divinely fast that I can only scream his name—-
"Eros!"
Spasms of pleasure rock my body, and still he hammers into me in that fucking divine way of his. It's too much, it's just too, too much, but just as my eyes start to roll back, I feel his big body stiffen—-
A whimper escapes me as his huge cock blows its load inside of me, and the thick, creamy heat of his seed makes everything start all over again. My eyes close, and my body slumps forward as he continues to fill me with his cum.
Eros, Eros, Eros.
I drift into an exhausted sleep with his name on my lips, but when I wake up, it's something entirely different that I find myself whispering.
"Cen."
I sit up in shock, and the bed dips as I feel my invisible god rising beside me.
What is it, moraki mou?
"Ms. R-Roo," I gasp out. "She told me before that n-no one with ill intent—-"
Can get past the school gates. Yes. That's true.
Unless someone from the inside invites that person in.
But why are you—-
"Because I didn't," I say fiercely. "I didn't invite Cen in, Eros. I actually wanted to see for myself if Rosethorne would let her in, and that was why I let my guard down. The school let her in..."
It takes a while before the god speaks, and when he finally does, only one four-letter word flashes in my mind, and it's something I completely agree with.
Fuck is definitely right.
End of Book 1
P.S. Please subscribe to my newsletter if you'd like to be notified about the release of BOOK 2: MY LUCIOUS.
P.P.S. In the meantime, please check out EVER WITH HADES if you haven't yet.This book was previously published as Eternal Night. Events in this book took place before My Eros. A new scene featuring Eros has also been added to the current edition.