Two days later, Tansy broke the promise she’d made to herself to give her and Beck some breathing room. Gathering her courage, and before she could change her mind, she invited him to dinner.
He said yes.
She’d been pretty sure he would, but a date out was a lot different than an invitation to spend the night with her and a four-year-old. To eat, she mentally corrected herself, not to spend the night.
The rest of the day, she was rattled.
Darlene stopped by to pick up a sour cream raisin pie she’d ordered. “What’s wrong, Tansy? You look a little frazzled.”
“Nothing’s wrong.”
“You answered that question a little too fast, I think. Anything I can help with?”
“Not really.” She puffed out a breath. “I invited Beck over for dinner.”
“Ah.”
“Yeah, ah. With Gracie and me.”
“What are you fixin’?”
“Since I’m working today and the air’s just that touch nippy, it has to be something easy and warm. I think I’ll make Swiss steak with noodles since mashed potatoes will take more time than I’ll have.”
“He’ll like that. Do you put tomatoes in yours?”
“No, but onions, lots of onions.” She pointed over her shoulder. “That pumpkin spice cake with honey frosting is dessert.”
“Sounds to me like everything’s under control.” Darlene patted Tansy’s hand. “Stop fretting, and enjoy that handsome young man.”
Tansy decided to do exactly that.
* * *
Beck showed up right on time, his hair still damp from his shower and wearing jeans and a long-sleeved T-shirt.
“Come on in,” she called through an upstairs window when he knocked at the back door. “It’s unlocked.”
As he trotted up the stairs to their living quarters, he raised his chin and sniffed the air. “If this meal tastes half as good as it smells, I’m in heaven.”
Spotting the cake on the counter, he swiped a finger through the frosting and popped it into his mouth.
Laughing, Tansy swatted him. “Stay out of that. You can have a piece if you clean your plate.”
Gracie leaned into him and wrapped an arm around his leg. “That’s what she tells me all the time.” She sighed.
“That’s ’cause you’re a growin’ girl. You need fuel for that body so you can grow up as pretty as your mama.”
“Okay.” Twirling, she headed to the table. “Since Beck’s here, Mama, can we eat now? I’m hungry.”
“Me too,” Beck chimed in.
“Go wash up while I finish here,” she said.
Both of them left for the powder room, Beck tossing a wink and a wicked grin over his shoulder. Tansy’s stomach did a funny little dance.
Oh boy.
* * *
She watched Beck and her daughter over dinner, their heads bent close as he cut up her meat. She’d offered, but Gracie had wanted Beck to do it. And she wanted Beck to put the gravy on her noodles and mash her carrots for her. Seemed her daughter had a thing for Mr. Elliot, too.
She’d worried about having him at the house. About it confusing Gracie. It seemed she’d worried needlessly.
About the food, too, because Beck did, indeed, clean his plate.
“Tanz, that was incredible.” He patted his stomach. “That steak was some of the most tender I’ve ever eaten.”
“Thank you, kind sir.”
“No, thank you. Are we gonna have that cake now?” He eyed it.
“Absolutely.”
She cut generous pieces, and Gracie talked about her day at preschool while they ate.
Beck pointed at a picture on the fridge. “You do that?”
Gracie nodded. “Mama said she might put it in a frame.”
“That would be a smart thing to do. Tell you what. Next time you’re in the mood, why don’t you make a picture for me? I’ll hang it in my office.”
“You will?”
“I sure will.” He glanced down at his plate. “Looks like my cake is all gone. How about yours?”
Gracie nodded.
“Why don’t the two of you go into the living room and relax?” Tansy suggested.
“You’re not comin’?”
“As soon as I clean up here.”
“As soon as we clean up,” he said.
“You’re company.”
“No, I’m Beck, and my mother taught me to help out.”
He cleared the table, while she put away leftovers and loaded the dishwasher.
The kitchen tidied up, Tansy said, “I’ll make us some coffee.”
“Sounds good. And speakin’ of good, that cake was fantastic.”
When she walked in carrying their mugs, she found Gracie curled up in Beck’s lap, listening to her favorite story. Her heart did a little twist as she leaned against the wall. The two of them looked good together. Emerson never held Gracie or let her cuddle with him, afraid she might get something on his expensive clothing.
There’d never been any question about his priorities. It was all about him, about appearances and his comfort. She could almost feel sorry for what he’d missed out on. Almost.
* * *
Beck finished the book, his arm tightening around Gracie as he leaned forward and laid it on the coffee table. He sniffed her hair. “You smell good, Gracie Bella.”
“My mama puts lotion on me.”
“Ah, I see. Do you think that’s why she smells good, too?”
“Uh-huh.” Gracie looked up at him with those expressive eyes as she twisted the bow on her T-shirt. “My daddy doesn’t like me.”
The words left Beck totally vulnerable.
Gracie sat very still in his lap, her eyes never leaving his.
He fought for the right words. Kissing the top of the girl’s head, he said, “That can’t be true, sweetheart. How could anyone not love you?”
She shook her head, her long hair swinging side to side. “He told me so. Lots and lots of times.” She reached up and put one hand on either side of his face. “I wish you were my daddy.”
He heard a small sound and looked up to see Tansy in the doorway.
“Wait! I forgotted.” Gracie jumped off his lap and skirted around Tansy. Crouching, she rooted around in her backpack. Pulling out a small piece of crumpled red paper, she ran back to Beck. “Teacher said to give this to our daddy. I don’t have one anymore, so I’ll give it to you.”
Jeez, could she stick that knife in any deeper? He unfolded the paper, skimmed it, and glanced up at Tansy.
“What is it?”
“An invitation to the preschool’s father/daughter luncheon tomorrow.”
The color leeched from her face, and she sank into a chair, setting the coffee cups on a side table. “Oh, sweetie.” She drew her daughter to her. “Why didn’t you tell me? Beck can’t—”
For a heartbeat, he couldn’t string three words together. Then he blurted, “Yes, Beck can,” he said. “If it’s okay with you.”
“Please, Mama, please.” Gracie twined her arms around Tansy’s neck. “I want Beck to go with me.”
“Are you sure?” Tansy raised stricken eyes to his.
“I am.”
“But you have to work.”
“Nothin’ needs done that won’t wait. This is important, sugar.”
Gracie looked from one to the other with basset-hound eyes. It would take a stronger man than he was to say no to that face. How could a person ever deny her anything?
“I think it would be wonderful.” The smile Tansy sent his way did crazy things to him. “Gracie, honey, why don’t you tell Beck good night? It’s time for bed.”
“Will you come for my school party tomorrow?”
“I will.”
Gracie patted his cheek. “Will you come for dinner again?”
He looked to Tansy for help. What did he say? The tenacious child was laying him bare. The daughter wanted him here, but did her mother? He hoped so, but with Tansy…
“We’ll see.” A nonanswer, but the best he could do.
Gracie’s grin was his reward. She crawled back up into his lap, pulled his head toward hers, and gave him a big, sloppy kiss.
He kissed her back, then lifted her off his lap. “’Night, sugar.”
“’Night, Beck.”
As she left the room, one hand in Tansy’s, she turned and blew him another kiss.
He caught it and closed his fist, holding it tightly.
Then he slipped quietly out of the house.
* * *
Tansy gave Beck megapoints when he showed up with flowers in hand for his date the next morning. Gracie had wanted to wait and go to school with him at ten thirty.
Good sport that he was, he’d agreed, without a second’s hesitation, to pick her up.
Gracie was over the moon, her young voice high with excitement. “Look, Mama! Look what Beck brought me! Will you put one in my hair?”
“I can do that.” She mouthed her thanks to Beck, who waited patiently while she wove one of the small pink roses into Gracie’s French braid.
“You couldn’t have chosen better, Beck.”
“I figured little girls and pink—they kind of go together. Besides, Cricket told me that was Gracie’s favorite color. And after seeing her room, it just made sense.”
The color was a perfect match for the lacy dress she’d chosen, and earlier that morning, Tansy had quickly painted her nails in a pale, pale pink. Gracie had even worn a pair of stick-on earrings because she swore Beck would like them.
And Beck? He was dressed in khakis and a button-down shirt the exact blue of his eyes. His hair, a tad shorter than he’d worn it in high school, still curled at the ends. Tansy loved that dark-blond hair.
“You owe me a cup of coffee,” he said.
“I do. You left without yours last night.”
“I thought it might be for the best.”
She nodded slowly. “You were probably right.”
A few minutes later, Tansy stood at the front door of her bakery and watched as Beck and Gracie walked, hand in hand, to his truck. She waited on the front porch while he fiddled with Gracie’s car seat, then gave a final wave as they pulled out, her heart pinching more than a little at the sight. Her high school sweetheart and former fiancé with her little girl.
A grin spread across her face. She wondered if Beck, after he’d gone home last night, had wondered what the heck he’d gotten himself into—or wondered that now, with Gracie no doubt chattering a mile a minute.
Then another thought wiped the grin right off her face. What might Gracie Bella tell Beck? There were no secrets as far as her daughter was concerned, and Beck might learn more than Tansy wanted him to know. Oh, well. Nothing for it now.
Since she was between the breakfast rush and the lunch bunch, she had no customers in the shop. Her baking finished, Tansy made herself a cappuccino and sat at the little table that overlooked the back garden and its pretty fountain. High up in the oak, a bird sang happily. Another waded in the new birdbath she’d added. Lush green grass spread out to the tree line.
Her heart raced with hope, and she felt lighter than she had in way too long.
Coming home the past few years had been hell. Every time she crossed the city limits, dread filled her at the idea she might run into Beck, followed by a fast, heartfelt prayer that she would. She’d hoped he wouldn’t catch sight of her but dressed carefully in case he did.
And the few times they’d bumped into each other… Whew! That time in Jenni Beth’s office, he’d made no bones about his feelings. She’d left that day and driven to the river to cry her heart out before returning to her mother’s for Gracie and the drive home.
Now? This morning? Beck had taken her little girl to a father/daughter party at school. Her woman’s heart, her mother’s heart nearly burst with emotion.
* * *
Beck opened Gracie’s door and reached in to lift her out.
“Your hair’s curly like my mommy’s.” She reached out to touch it, then pulled a couple curls till they stretched out.
He laughed. “Yes, it is.”
“But it’s not the same color.”
“No. Your mommy’s is prettier.”
With all the innocence of the young, she nodded. “It looks like fire sometimes.”
“It does.” And it matched the fire inside, he thought. The fire that was returning with each day.
When he walked through the door, Lucinda, the preschool teacher, did a double take.
“Beck! What are you doing here?” Then she saw who he was with. “Gracie, don’t you look pretty.” Her gaze went back to Beck, and she tipped her head toward the little girl. “Does this mean you and Tansy…”
“It means I came to a party with my favorite girl.”
“He’s gonna be my daddy.”
“For today,” Beck amended quickly.
“Yeah.” Gracie did a pirouette on her shiny, new patent leathers. “He bringed me flowers. See?”
She did another turn to show off the rose in her hair.
“That’s beautiful, honey.”
Lucinda’s attention moved back to him, but when she opened her mouth to ask what he was sure would be another question about him and Tansy, he beat her to the punch. “Where do you want us to sit? I see you’ve got other daddies comin’ in. Don’t want to tie you up.”
“You could.”
He knew he blushed.
She laughed and pointed to a table on the right side of the room. “Gracie, why don’t you show Beck where your table is?”
Singing in her high, little voice, Gracie took his hand and led him across the room, then pulled out a chair for him. A tiny chair. A teeny-tiny chair. He perched on it cautiously, praying the spindly little legs would hold his weight. Gracie knelt on hers, talking a mile a minute, pointing out the weather chart she’d helped with yesterday, the finger painting she’d done, the class’s ant farm.
With his knees practically around his ears, he listened to her chatter and realized how refreshing it was to see life through a child’s eyes.
Other dads started taking their seats, too, sitting uncomfortably in the small chairs. He and a couple others made some small talk while they waited.
Trick-or-treating was coming up soon. If he was really lucky, maybe he could convince Tansy to let him tag along with her and Gracie. Christmas and Santa must be insanely fun. He looked around at the other dads in the room and felt like an imposter. He wasn’t Gracie’s daddy; he wasn’t anybody’s daddy.
As he watched, the sweet little girl beside him broke her cookie in two.
“You want half, Daddy Beck?”
He stared, dumbfounded. Daddy Beck? Where had that come from? He should tell her not to call him that.
“Mama made them. They’re really good.”
He couldn’t do it, couldn’t burst whatever bubble she was blowing. Not now. Not here. She might cry, and then what would he do?
Instead, he took a deep breath and accepted the offered cookie. “Thank you, Gracie Bella.”
“You’re welcome.” Then she looked up at him with those big, brown eyes and stabbed him dead center in the heart. “Will you be my daddy?”
Leaning into him, she wrapped those little hands around his arm.
What could he say? Instead of answering, he leaned down and kissed that beautiful dark hair.
When he straightened, he met Lucinda’s gaze. A sad little half smile played on her lips. The two of them had gone out a couple times, but there’d been no chemistry, no buzz. Not for him, anyway. He had a sneaking suspicion she’d wanted it to work badly.
He was sorry for that. He knew how it felt to want and not be able to have.
They ate cupcakes and more cookies and drank lemonade. Then it was entertainment time. Gracie had a small solo in a cute song about five little ducks that left one by one, then all returned. She and the others acted it out with a lot of waddling and quacking and hiding behind the bookcase, and he enjoyed every second of it.
When the program ended, Beck stood. He had to go to work. Gracie, who was staying for the rest of the afternoon, walked him to the door.
“Thanks, Daddy Beck.” She suddenly turned shy, looking down and tapping the tip of his shoe with hers.
He knelt and placed a finger under her chin. “I had a great time, Gracie. Thanks for invitin’ me. And your mama’s cookies?” He leaned closer to whisper, “They were the best ones!”
She grinned and threw her arms around his neck. Tansy’s little girl was a definite keeper.
He left the classroom with a smile on his face and a small photo of him and Gracie at their table, tapping their cups together and grinning at each other as if they shared a special secret. Maybe he’d stop in at the bakery and show it to Tansy. He really should give it to her, but he was probably going to be selfish and keep it. Maybe he’d make a copy for her. Later.
Right now, though, he needed to see her. After spending the better part of the day with Gracie, he found himself wanting to talk to her mama. Badly.
He wanted to kiss her mama, too. Naughty thoughts about what else he’d like to do to and with Gracie’s mama chased one another through his brain. Oh yeah, he had it bad.