Late morning, Rebecca read a lovely letter from her mother for the second time. She asked after Rebecca’s health and how she was fairing at Crane Landing. She shared news of home and what the children were doing and that they all desperately missed her and Grandmother. Her mother had enclosed a note from Helen Fiske, Rebecca’s longtime friend she had no memory of. Helen wrote simply and with great warmth that she understood that Rebecca didn’t remember her, but she was confident they would become great friends again upon Rebecca’s return. For now, Helen just wanted Rebecca to know she was thinking of her with the warmest thoughts and wishing her a quick and complete recovery. She added a request that Rebecca tell her all about Crane Landing when she returned. Feeling genuine warmth toward Helen, Rebecca folded the note knowing she’d had a good life in Fredonia. She would go back soon and try to reconnect with the many wonderful people she had in her life. But for today, she would embrace her new life and her new friends here in Crane Landing.
With that thought in mind, Rebecca called on Mary Crane to invite her to supper that evening. Then she went on to the mill to ask Adam to bring Leo with him when he came for supper. For Rebecca, the more engaged she kept her mind the less chance for irrational thoughts to sneak in. And the more time she spent with Adam the greater the possibility she would remember him and their love... and her past.
At the mill, Adam guided her to a secluded spot in the yard where it was safer and quieter for them to talk. “I’d rather skip supper and meet you on the back porch in the middle of the night again,” he teased.
Rebecca felt her face heat. She’d been as shameful and bold with him as Adam’s mother must have been with her male customers. The instant the thought registered, she gasped and clasped her hands over her ears as if she couldn’t bear her own wicked thoughts. To even think such a thing was surely evidence of an unstable mind.
“What’s the matter?” Adam asked, his flirtatious smile replaced by a look of concern.
“I... well, I... I’m mortified by my behavior last night,” she said, grasping at anything that might explain her bizarre outburst. But she was really mortified—and scared—by the obviously irrational direction of her thoughts.
“You were sweet and adorable last night.” He slipped his fingers over hers and lowered her hands to her sides, holding them in his own strong and steady hands. “We’ve shared many such moments, Rebecca, and every one of them was filled with love and never involved anything you need be ashamed of.”
She nodded, struggling to erase the horrid thought about Adam’s poor dead mother. “Thank you, Adam. I was just... I felt so desperate to remember you that I tossed my good sense straight into the river the instant you touched me.”
“Rebecca...” He tilted her chin until her eyes met his. “We’re trying to find our way back to each other. We need moments like that when we’re alone. We need to be free to talk honestly and even kiss if we desire. There’s no shame in kissing your betrothed,” he said.
“You were kissing your betrothed, Adam. I was kissing a man I’m just getting to know. There is a big difference between the two.”
Slowly, he shook his head. “No, Rebecca. Last night you knew me. I could feel the difference when I held you. If you don’t believe me, meet me on the porch at midnight. I know what I felt from you. Let me hold you again, and when you close your eyes you’ll remember me... you’ll remember us,” he said.
His certainty stunned her. There was truth to his words that put her thoughts in a spin. She had felt completely comfortable with him last night as if she had spent years being held in his arms. When he’d first arrived and caught her in a semi-sleep, moving into his arms had felt like the most natural thing in the world. His scent, his touch, the sound of his voice was... it felt like... home.
“Perhaps...” she said, slowly, her thoughts still anchored in their late night encounter.
“Perhaps you’ll meet me?” he asked.
She shook her head. “I meant perhaps I may have remembered you... for a few minutes,” she said.
“You knew me, Rebecca.” He slid his hands up her arms and gently squeezed her shoulders. “Let me help you remember. Meet me again tonight.”
She took a step back, both scared and excited about the thought of another late night interlude with Adam. “I’ll see you at supper. Will you bring Leo?”
The intensity drained from his eyes. “Is it Mary or you who wants Leo there?”
Rebecca frowned. “We both do. Why do you ask?”
Adam shook his head. “Curiosity is all. If he’s available, I’ll bring him along. Think about meeting me tonight, will you?”
“I’ll consider it.” With that, Rebecca turned and hurried out of the yard before she could commit herself to something she might regret. She needed to think this through logically, not emotionally. But wild exciting thoughts circled her mind as she walked to the grocer to pick up a few items that her grandmother had requested. If she met Adam tonight she could enjoy the wonderful sensation of being held in his arms. She could close her eyes and drink in his scent. But more importantly she could feel connected to him—and her past—again.
The temptation to meet him burned hard in her breast as she headed out River Road.
As soon as she returned home she helped her grandmother in the kitchen for an hour and then took Jojo outside to play. Minutes later she had followed Jojo to the front yard where the frisky kitten chased a tiny white moth flitting beneath the maple tree.
The sound of a carriage rattling up the short drive surprised Rebecca.
“Good day, young lady,” Doctor Samuel said, hailing her from the driver’s seat. “I was down the road checking on Micah Crane and thought I’d head up the hill and check on you as well.”
Rebecca welcomed the doctor, but as they sat on the front porch she silently cautioned herself to choose her words with care. “I had planned to see you tomorrow, Doctor Samuel.”
“I know, and I have saved you the trip,” he said. “How have your headaches been?” he asked.
“They are improving, but still a bother.”
“How frequent and how severe are they?” he asked.
“I have daily headaches of varying degree,” she answered lightly as if it was a common complaint.
The doctor eyed her closely for a minute. “Are you sleeping any better at night?
“I’m managing all right,” she said, being intentionally evasive about her sleeping habits. Her nightmare last night was enough to keep her silent on anything others may perceive as unusual. Jojo scampered onto the porch and batted at the hem of Rebecca’s skirt. With a light laugh, she lifted the kitten onto her lap. “This is Jojo’s way of telling me she’s ready for a nap,” Rebecca said to the doctor.
He smiled and watched the kitten settle in. “Where did she come from?” he asked.
Rebecca gladly shifted the conversation to the kitten and told him all about Jojo’s escapades since joining their household.
While she talked, Doctor Samuel watched her closely. “Is there any particular reason you’re uncomfortable with me, Rebecca?”
His question stopped her cold.
“You seem to be physically improved, but deeply troubled.”
His astute observation terrified her. She stared at the doctor as if he’d caught her pilfering his medicine chest. “I’m fine,” she said, but her declaration sounded fearful and unconvincing.
He nodded, but continued probing and questioning her for several minutes. “You appear to be on edge,” he said. “Are you feeling overwhelmed?” he asked. And on and on he queried until she actually laughed.
“I’m fine, Doctor, but your numerous questions are making me feel worse.”
She expected him to relent, but Doctor Samuel had a keen eye for evasion and wouldn’t be diverted from getting to a clear diagnosis.
“What’s bothering you, Rebecca?”
Knowing he wouldn’t leave until she gave him something to chew on, she finally confessed to having sleepless nights, but she blamed it on headache pain. She told him that staying at Crane Landing was helping her relax and feel less agitated, although she wouldn’t tell him about the disturbing thoughts she’d been having or that she had been looking for the red-haired lady to assure herself the woman wasn’t a hallucination.
With a loud sigh Doc Samuel patted her shoulder and got to his feet. “When you’re ready to share what is on your mind come see me, dear. I want to see you again in two weeks either way.”
As soon as he left, Rebecca forcefully put the doctor out of her mind. She didn’t want to spend another minute thinking about her accident or her headaches or any of the myriad complications that came with it. She wanted to enjoy her time in this beautiful town.
And that’s what she tried to do that evening when she and Mary challenged Adam and Leo to a game of lawn croquet after supper.
Adam had always thought Rebecca at her most beautiful when working with her horses at the livery back in Fredonia.
He’d been wrong.
As he sat on the porch watching Rebecca, the late afternoon sun casting a soft, warm glow about her, he knew she was at the height of her beauty right now, and would be more so in two more seconds, and two more beyond that.
Adam could sense the joyful energy that emanated from her. She was in her element here—in this house, in Crane Landing. She had smiled so much throughout dinner that everyone else naturally gravitated to her state of happiness.
Her eyes lit up as she laughed at something silly Leo said, and Adam felt his heart lift at the sight. He loved seeing her happy, animated. There had been too many shadows in her eyes since her accident. But he wanted to be the one to make her laugh.
“Be warned, Rebecca. I see a plot in motion,” said Mary in a light, teasing tone. “Leo is trying to soften his opponents. He doesn’t want us winning the croquet game.”
“What a pity,” said Rebecca, her brown eyes narrowing as she focused on Leo. “So that’s what you’re up to then?”
Leo feigned innocence. “Now, now, don’t believe everything Mary says.”
“Only the things I say about Leo,” Mary replied.
“Duly noted.” Rebecca leaned toward Mary and in a conspirator’s tone, said, “We’ll let him prove his worth on the croquet court.”
“Where we women shall soon rule,” Mary agreed.
Leo simply grinned and leaned back in his chair, threading his fingers together behind his head.
Mary rolled her eyes. “What are you up to Mr. Sullivan?”
He gave her a melting grin. “You ladies will find out soon enough.”
“Quit divulging our secrets,” Adam said, nudging Leo’s chair leg with the toe of his shoe.
The chair rocked back at a dangerous angle. Leo splayed his arms and righted the chair before it went over backwards. “Killing or crippling your partner isn’t part of our plan, Adam.”
“Neither is taunting the opposition. Come on, now,” Adam said, shooing Leo out of his chair before he tipped it backward again. “Let’s get this match going before you crack your fool head open.”
Mary, who had brought the croquet set, got to her feet and gestured to a rectangular wooden box on the grass. “You fellas set up the game while we clean up.”
Grandma waved away Mary’s assistance. “You four go on now. Dawson and I want to enjoy the river without you gals clanking dishes in the sink. I’ll take care of them later. “You can set the game up in the field by the apple orchard.”
The happy foursome hurried to an open patch of lawn up the hill beyond the garden.
Bordered by a small old-growth apple orchard first begun by the Crane family nearly one hundred years ago, the expanse of lawn held a vista view of Crane River. At one time it had been a favored look-out spot for watching the logs head downriver during the spring melt. Through the years, though, the wide expanse of lawn evolved into a perfect place for picnics and lawn games. A babbling brook amid a stand of oak trees edged the far side of the area.
They headed for the middle of the wide space. Adam and Leo each carried a handle of the crate-like croquet box. Rebecca, with a curious Jojo in her arms, walked beside Adam on his left, while Mary walked alongside Leo.
“We used to play with this croquet set when I was just a girl,” Mary said. “It belonged to my grandfather. He loved to play, especially after dark. There’s a holder for a candle atop each wicket.”
“Sounds like fun,” Rebecca replied.
“It is!” Mary said. “Once it grows dark and we light the candles atop the wickets, it’s rather unnerving when a ball is struck out of bounds into the oak grove where anything could be lurking in the dark.”
“Should your ball go astray I’ll escort you into the shadowy night, my dear,” Leo said, playfully wagging his brows as they headed toward the middle of the clearing.
“That’s about as comforting as a fox guarding a hen house.” Mary gave a mock click of her tongue. “No wonder the Boston clergy claim croquet encourages bad behavior.”
Leo and Rebecca both laughed.
Adam just shook his head. It felt good to be here with his friends. When he was a small boy, long before he and his sister moved to Fredonia, he’d ached for moments like this. Back then he had no friends. The neighbor children weren’t allowed to play with him. They called him names, threw stones at him, and even hit him with a stick once when they caught him spying on them. After that, Adam would hide in his yard and secretly peer at the neighbor children playing games with each other and wonder why he wasn’t acceptable to them.
Now he knew why, but his childhood had been a painful, lonely time he was happy to forget.
He glanced over at Rebecca, who carried Jojo in the crook of her arm, and knew this moment was Heaven sent—for both of them. A look of pure joy on her face, Rebecca scratched Jojo’s tiny head with one finger. Adam could hear the little fur ball purring.
“She sounds like the saw at the mill,” he said. “Think she’ll stay near while we play the game?”
“I’ll keep a close eye on her.”
“So will I, and I’ll keep a close eye on you, too,” he said, giving Rebecca a flirtatious wink that made her laugh.
They finally reached the middle of the clearing where Adam and Leo set down the crate. Adam opened the hinged lid to reveal a gleaming handcrafted croquet set of boxwood trimmed with brass.
Leo lifted one of the long-handled mallets from the case, a whistle of approval sliding through his teeth. “That’s some craftsmanship at work. Let me guess. One of your Crane ancestors bought it in some far-off place.”
“Not that far-off. England. And maybe not that long ago—the 1860s, I think,” Mary said.
“Long ago enough for me. So it’s ladies against the gentlemen then?”
“Absolutely,” Rebecca said, setting Jojo in the grass.
While Jojo timidly explored the field, Adam and Leo set the stakes and wickets in the ground, and then everyone gathered in a circle for the coin toss to decide colors. Adam and Leo would play the blue and yellow balls; Rebecca and Mary, the red and black balls.
Adam was up first, and soon the crisp crack of mallet heads against balls could be heard echoing across the river.
Leo proved to be the strategist in the game, thinking through various types of shots before making one. But Mary outplayed him and obstructed his ball whenever she could, which was often and the cause of much laughing and jesting among the four of them.
Rebecca played with abandon. Adam could almost see her casting off her cares as she chatted and played with him and their friends. On the croquet court, she didn’t seem to fret about her memory loss or the future; she simply played the game—and beautifully at that.
Jojo chased Rebecca’s ball a few times and even swatted at the mallet head, but mostly the kitten sat back on her haunches and watched her mistress.
Eventually dusk gave way to darkness and the croquet court took on a faerie-like glow as candles burned atop each of the wickets. The friendly rivalry between Mary and Leo increased as the daylight sank away, but Adam noticed that Rebecca became anxious as they played by candlelight. Mary and Leo outpaced them, finishing the course and then waiting at a corner of the court to tease each other some more.
Was it the darkness Rebecca feared? The night to come? Perhaps her injury caused her eyes trouble in adjusting to the lack of light. Adam didn’t know, but he aimed to find out.
“Is something troubling you, Rebecca?”
“Do you know where Jojo is? I don’t see her.”
Adam nodded to the crate. “She jumped in it during your last shot. She’s sound asleep there. Snug as a bug.”
“Oh...” She pressed a hand to her chest. “Thank goodness.”
“Do you want to stop? We can tell Mary and Leo we’re ready to go back to the house.”
Rebecca shook her head. “As long as Jojo is safe I’d like to finish.” She smiled then and met his eyes. “I’ll be sorry to end this fun match by besting you.”
He returned her smile. “It’s not over yet, darling.”
As they headed for the last few wickets, Adam earned an extra stroke by hitting Rebecca’s ball. He made roquet with his striker ball against Rebecca’s roqueted ball, sending hers out of the way. He purposely left her with a difficult shot because if he knew one thing best about Rebecca Grayson it was that she was determined. She did her best when challenged.
“Oh! You rascal!” she said, setting her hands on her hips as if put out with him, but he could see that she loved their playful competition.
Once Adam scored the next wicket, Rebecca moved into action and not only put her ball back into play, but through the final wickets to the finishing stake.
When she looked up at Adam, a delighted smile lit her beautiful face. “I did it,” she whispered, the glow of the candles on the last two wickets wreathing her features in a soft light.
“You did,” he agreed softly.
Adam moved toward her, tapping his ball to the final stake. But he was no longer paying attention to the game because he didn’t care about winning or even finishing. He only cared about spending the day with Rebecca. The challenge for him had been to make it through the match without pulling her into his lonely aching arms.
He stopped in front of her, gently took the mallet from her hands and then set both mallets against the stake.
“Want to talk about it?” he asked.
“About what?” She hugged her arms about her body as if cold.
“About why you panicked earlier when you knew full well Jojo was asleep in the crate. You haven’t let that little fur ball out of your sight all evening. What happened?” He shrugged out of his coat and wrapped it about her shoulders. “Something upset you, my love.”
“It’s—I was having such fun with you and our friends and I just... I realized how happy I am here and that our time here is going by so fast and... and it made me a little sad is all. I want to get my memory back before we go home so I can have this same feeling when I see my family and the friends I left behind there. Mama’s letters are so beautiful and I miss my family deeply, but I can’t bear the thought of having to leave all of this behind when we go home.”
Adam rubbed his hands up and down her arms, hoping to warm her and calm her. “I know, sweetheart.” He put his mouth to her brow and kissed her, then touched his forehead to hers. “It won’t be easy, but we’ll make sure we visit here often.”
They stood there a moment, the sounds of the night wrapping about them.
“Do you hear that?” Adam asked.
“Leo laughing?”
“No, that burbling sound.”
“Yes, I hear it.”
“It’s the stones in the creek bed that change the course of the water and create the river’s song. No stones, no song.” Gently, he drew her to him. “Our obstacles and heartaches help create our song. What we are today is not what we will be tomorrow. Change is inevitable, darling, and it doesn’t have to be a bad thing or distress you. I’ll be right here... listening to your beautiful song as the twists and turns in life add new layers to your melody.”
“That’s so beautiful, Adam.” On a sigh, she lowered her forehead to his shoulder. “You must think I’m a dreadful mess.”
“I think you’re the most remarkable woman I’ve ever met.” He tilted her chin up and looked into her dark eyes. “Will you meet me tonight, Rebecca?”