On a sunny mid-July morning, Rebecca walked out Bay Street admiring the sparkling water filled with fishing boats and merchant vessels. Her heart ached to know she would be leaving this beautiful ocean-side town in just three days. She did miss her family and wished they could be here in this peaceful place where they would have time to get reacquainted without the chaos and intrusion of a town full of well-meaning friends and neighbors. It was just too hard for Rebecca to keep her thoughts straight while surrounded by so many voices no matter how helpful their intent.
Lost in thought, she strolled up Main Street peering in shop windows for perhaps the last time. Eventually, she made her way to Church Street and rang the bell at Doctor Samuel’s residence.
His apprentice, a blonde-haired young man not much older than Rebecca, introduced himself as Zacharias Crane and escorted her into Doctor Samuel’s exam room.
“How are you this fine morning?” the doctor asked as Rebecca took a seat on a thick cushioned stool. His apprentice stepped away and stood beside a tall cupboard to observe her visit.
Rebecca opened her mouth to say she was fine, but she wasn’t. Not by a long shot. “I don’t want to go home,” she blurted. “I... I’m just not ready yet.”
Doc Samuel arched a white eyebrow. “Any particular reason you don’t want to go back?”
She sat silent for a moment, her mind whirling as she tried to come up with a suitable response. Finally, she shook her head and said, “I haven’t remembered a single thing about my life, Doctor. The thought of going back without remembering even the slightest bit about my family is just so... it’s frustrating and makes my head hurt and I just... I can’t bear it.”
He studied her in silence for so long she began to fidget. Finally, he said, “You need to understand and accept that you might never recover your memories, Rebecca. I know that’s dreadfully upsetting, but you need to understand and accept this possibility.”
Hearing her biggest fear stated so baldly left her breathless and on the edge of tears. “I have to remember, Doctor. I just... I must remember.”
Again he studied her in silence, tapping his finger across his pursed lips. The young apprentice stood silent and watchful as if trying to read the doctor’s mind. Finally, Doc Samuel spoke. “Rebecca, I suspect there’s more on your mind than recovering your memory. You’ve been agitated during all of our visits, and yet you won’t share your concerns with me. I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s really going on with you.” He stopped as if waiting for Rebecca to make her confession, but she sat mute and frightened, not knowing if she could trust the doctor or his watchful apprentice. Finally, the doctor placed his hands on his knees and pushed himself to his feet. “All right, young lady. Let’s get you on the exam table so I can take a look at you.”
While the doctor ran through his typical exam, testing her recall and balance and various other things to determine her healing and progression, Rebecca knew he couldn’t help her if she didn’t trust him.
“I’m having bad dreams,” she blurted.
Surprised, he stopped looking into her ear canal and stepped back, the lighted scope hanging from his hand. “What’s bad about them?”
“I keep trying to get home, but I’m lost and... and someone is chasing me.”
“Who is chasing you?”
Rebecca swallowed and reminded herself that the doctor couldn’t help her if she wasn’t honest with him. “You are.”
Both of his eyebrows lifted. “Why am I chasing you, Rebecca?”
She wrung her hands, but forced herself to look at him. “You want to put me in an asylum like you did with Dawson Crane.”
“What?” He laughed and then immediately sobered as if aware he might have insulted her. “I apologize, but you have surely given me one of the biggest shocks of my career. Why am I trying to put you in an asylum?”
“Because you think I’m insane, of course.”
“Oh, dear.” He patted her shoulder and chuckled. “Rebecca, what makes you think you’re not sane?”
“I don’t think that,” she said, immediately defensive. “I’m quite sane, Doctor Samuel.”
“I quite agree, but something is going on that makes you question yourself. I can’t help you if you don’t share those things with me.”
He was right. Rebecca released a sigh, weary of trying to carry her troubles alone. “Do you recall that I saw a woman on the beach that my grandmother couldn’t see?”
He nodded. “Have you seen her again?”
Rebecca shook her head. “No, but I talked with a woman on the train that no one else saw. Daddy said I was asleep and dreaming the event, but I... I remember the porter searching for a valise, so I couldn’t have been sleeping, and the event was so real I can still see it in my mind.”
“You could have been in a half-sleep, Rebecca. We can imagine things as if we’re right in the middle of them and still hear what’s going on around us. That doesn’t make one crazy.”
“Perhaps,” she said, “but I’ve also had very disturbing thoughts that make me question—um, that frighten me.”
“Thoughts about what?” he asked.
His apprentice seemed deeply intrigued and began taking notes.
Rebecca knew then that she had gone too far. She simply couldn’t reveal her irrational thoughts and risk being sent away. “I seem to have developed a fear of snakes,” she said, knowing she would reveal nothing else to the doctor or his inquisitive apprentice. She would find her way through this on her own.
“There is nothing unusual about that, Rebecca. I have a healthy fear of those critters myself.” The doctor circled the exam table and checked the back of her head. “This has healed nicely.” He circled back to stand in front of her. “Rebecca, I didn’t put Dawson Crane in an asylum. Doc Franklin did. He was a good doctor, but he was old and didn’t have the benefit of the education I received, just as I don’t have the benefit of the education young Zacharias here has gotten. Medicine is always making progress. Doc Franklin put Dawson in the asylum because he didn’t know how to help him.”
Rebecca pressed her hand to her sick stomach. “I’m so sorry, Doctor. I hope I haven’t offended you.”
Doc Samuel shook his head. “Of course not. I understand now why you’re having difficulty talking with me.”
She wasn’t talking because she couldn’t share her bizarre thoughts with anyone.
“Rest assured I have no intention of putting anyone in an asylum, least of all you.”
However comforting his assurance, she wasn’t convinced he could keep his word once he really understood the level of her irrational thinking. And there was no guarantee that Zacharias would uphold the doctor’s promise. “How did you know about Dawson Crane?” she asked.
“Dawson’s father, George Crane, contacted me and asked me to check on his son. I went to the asylum to see Dawson, and when I met him I knew his injury was significant, but he was not insane. He just needed time to heal and some help relearning things. I brought him back to Crane Landing and made this place my home.” He patted Rebecca’s clenched hands. “You have no reason to fear me. Now, do you think your father would agree to you staying another month? I believe we’re beginning to make some progress.”
Rebecca didn’t know if she could or should extend her stay, but she certainly wanted to. While she waited, the doctor placed a call from his office to the Grayson sawmill and spoke with her father. Rebecca sat in mild shock when she realized the doctor not only had her father’s number but that they had spoken several times during the course of her treatment. When Doc Samuel hung up the phone he was smiling. “Your father sends his love and wants you to take whatever time you need here.”
The news elated Rebecca, but as soon as she began the walk home, she realized how selfish she was being. Adam had a partnership waiting for him at the mill. Her grandmother had other grandchildren and a life in Fredonia. To keep either of them here any longer would be unforgivably self-serving and inconsiderate. She’d already asked too much of them. And Adam wanted to marry her as soon as they returned home.
But that evening Adam assured her he was enjoying their stay and even felt a little selfish because he was glad to have her to himself for another few weeks. Grandmother expressed a mixture of melancholy and delight at extending her holiday. She desperately missed the rest of their family, but knowing it was only for another month soothed her heartache. She even expressed a bit of embarrassment that she was glad to spend a little more time with her friend Dawson. The Crane family, Mary in particular, was thrilled to have Rebecca and her grandmother making use of the house for another month. Rebecca and her grandmother thanked the Cranes with a huge picnic style supper on their back porch that weekend. Adam, Dawson and Leo attended making it a large, festive affair that pulled Rebecca’s thoughts far from her troubles.
Their picnic set the pace for the weeks to follow. Grandmother and Rebecca spent their days housekeeping and playing with Jojo and preparing evening meals that were always attended by Adam and Dawson and often included Leo and Mary—and sometimes her family. After their casual suppers, and on weekends, they would play lawn games or cards or just share each other’s company amid frequent laughter and storytelling. Rebecca visited Doc Samuel again and shared another snake dream with him, but kept everything else to herself. She took long walks with Adam and engaged in interesting, fun and sometimes intense conversations that made them laugh, and some talks that jangled her nerves and made her beg Adam to stop talking about their past. He seemed to be learning when to leave their past in the past, which was helping Rebecca relax and share more with him.
And late at night, when everyone was sleeping, Rebecca would make a steaming cup of willow bark tea Adam had mixed for her and drink it while she waited for him on the porch. When he arrived they would talk quietly and she would dream of having a fulfilling normal life someday.
With each day that passed she found herself a little deeper in friendship, admiration, and even love with Adam, and one day closer to their inevitable return to Fredonia. As their time at Crane Landing grew shorter Rebecca’s head filled with more and more odd thoughts, none of which she shared with Doc Samuel, even during her final visit. She expected his frustration and perhaps even anger, but he simply shook his head and said he wanted to see her again in six months. He suggested she go home and spend time with her family. Then, to her surprise, he gave her a hug and told her to find someone she could trust with her troubles.
His advice resonated deep in Rebecca’s heart and she longed to do just that, but she couldn’t.
August heat warmed the sun washed beach. Rebecca clung to Adam’s arm and approached the towering lighthouse with a mix of excitement and melancholy. Tomorrow morning, she would leave her little house on the river and take the train home to Fredonia with Adam and their grandmother.
Walking the rocky shoreline for the last time made her heart ache. Ocean waves broke against rocky shoals and crashed into shore, shooting foamy spray high in the air. A strong breeze carried the mist across the beach, cooling Rebecca’s face and creating mini rainbows in the dazzling sunshine.
She should be rejoicing to have spent so much time in this beautiful place instead of brooding about going back to her little village filled with so many wonderful people. Leaving didn’t have to be forever. Adam had promised to bring her back to Crane Landing. If her suspicions were on target, her grandmother might like to return for a visit as well. Maybe Rebecca’s memories would return before she came back and she could share more of her life with Mary Crane during her next visit.
Forcing her despondent thoughts away, Rebecca struggled to keep pace with Adam as they followed their grandmother and Dawson along the beach strewn with ocean grass, stone, and shells. When they finally stopped and craned their necks to look up the rocky cliff, Rebecca’s breath caught in her throat.
Perched high atop an outcropping of rock that jutted into the North Atlantic, the white lighthouse with a red and green crown seemed to scrape the blue sky above.
“How utterly magnificent,” she said.
“That climb looks daunting.” Grandma eyed the wooden stairway that hugged the rocky cliff before them. “There must be a hundred stairs or more.”
“Sixty-four actually,” Dawson said. “Plus two-hundred-fourteen inside the lighthouse.”
“Sakes alive, I won’t even manage to reach the door of the lighthouse,” Grandma said.
Dawson merely grinned. “You don’t need to make it to the top, Nancy. You just have to try.”
Rebecca shot a look of approval at Adam. She liked Dawson Crane and the effect he was having on their grandmother. Adam’s crooked smile suggested he liked the man too.
“You sound like my late husband,” Grandma said, parking her hand on her hip.
Dawson grinned. “He must have been a smart man.”
“He was too smart some days, just like you, Mr. Crane.” She pursed her mouth as if trying to hold back a smile. “Now how do you propose to get me out of here should I not manage the climb?”
“I have no idea.” A perplexed look crossed his face. “It’s a long way back... and it’s a long way up. You could be stuck here for some time, I’m afraid.”
Grandma eyed the cliff with concern. “How did I let you talk me into this?”
Dawson’s laughter rang across the shore. “Don’t fret, Nancy. Hitch up your skirt and let’s see what you’re made of.”
To Rebecca’s delight her grandmother lifted her skirt two inches and strode toward the wooden stairs that zigzagged up the face of the rocky cliff. “Challenge accepted, Mr. Crane. I just hope these old treads will support our weight.”
Behind them, Adam offered his elbow to Rebecca. “May I escort you up sixty-four rickety stairs?”
Rebecca gladly took his arm. “If we come crashing down upon the rocks I’m counting on you to cushion my fall.
“I’ll absorb the impact with my own body,” he said leading them on.
She laughed and missed the first step.
Adam caught her elbow.
As she looked up, he looked down. His gorgeous smile was so close and enticing that she nearly kissed him.
“Are you being intentionally reckless, my love?” he asked.
The breeze lifted strands of her hair and brought the scent of ocean and fish and sea grass. “Walking the shore with the wind on my face and you at my side makes me feel reckless.” She hiked her skirt a couple of inches higher. “It makes me think about giving you that kiss I owe you.”
“My resistance is at low tide, Rebecca. Watch your step now,” he said quietly, nodding to the worn board beneath her shoe. But she knew he was warning her not to push him beyond his limits—and that made her wonder what he’d do if she did push him. The thought was intriguing.
Looking into his handsome face she longed to throw herself into his protective arms. She wanted to let the tide of their love pull her out to sea... Maybe she would. After all, it was their last day at Crane Landing. Tomorrow they would be going back to Fredonia. Back to a place that Rebecca was supposed to remember and to people she was supposed to know. Back instead of forward...
“Shall we?” he asked, gesturing for her to begin to climb.
Yes, she thought. Yes, we shall.
And so Rebecca embraced the day and Adam’s love and the wonderful sense of playfulness that seemed to permeate their relationship. She would make the best of each new day.
She would also make it up these never-ending stairs. Somehow.
Thankfully, her grandmother stopped so often to admire the view that the climb became an enjoyable adventure rather than a hard trek to their destination. The bay and ocean beyond were dotted with dories and schooners and fishing vessels of all kinds. A ship with her magnificent sails billowing surfed across the waves and eventually slipped across the horizon.
Overcome by the vastness and the beauty, Rebecca pressed a palm to her stomach and sighed. “There are no words, Adam.”
He stroked her back and said nothing, as if he agreed. Words couldn’t capture such a moment of majesty.
“I must see this from the top of the lighthouse,” she said, her voice dreamy sounding even to her own ears.
“Let’s step around Grandma and Dawson and make our way up. I think they’ll be a while yet.” Taking her hand, Adam carefully led them past their grandmother and Dawson, who both seemed blissfully happy lingering on the cliff-side stairs watching the day go by. “Will we see you two at the top?” Adam asked.
Their grandmother laughed. “If you mean at the top of these stairs, then yes, I’ll make it that far. But if you’re asking if I’ll climb another step once I reach the top of this cliff, you have a lot more faith in these old legs than I do.”
“All right, then,” he said, laughing. “Rebecca and I are keen for the challenge. See you at the lighthouse.” With that, he and Rebecca finished the climb.
At the top, Rebecca stopped and fanned her face, awed by the towering monument in front of her. A heavy wooden door painted red and trimmed in black gave access to the circular brick tower shooting into the vast sky overhead. “It’s so much bigger than I’d imagined,” she said, breathless from the climb and her first up-close view of a lighthouse. “I can’t even imagine how one would get to the top of this thing.”
“Stairs that wind around and around and go up and up and up,” Adam said, laughing at her horrified look. “Come on. You’ll love this.” He guided her inside.
Sunlight washed in the open door behind them as Rebecca stopped in surprise. Two large arched windows sat deep in the brick walls of the structure. A thick cushioned well-worn chair sat beneath the window to her left, and a single bunk topped with a multicolored charm quilt had been pushed against the same wall. On the opposite side of the room a small heat stove and another chair offered an inviting respite. In the center of the room sat a massive oak desk and a man about her father’s age with dark hair, gray sideburns, and eyes the color of the ocean.
“Greetings,” he said, laying his pen aside and closing a journal of some sort. He stood and extended his hand to Adam. “I see you made the trek unscathed.”
“Good morning, Horace.” Adam shook the lighthouse keeper’s hand. “I thought my fiancé would enjoy the challenge of taking the shore route here. Now we’ll see if she’s up for the climb,” he said, tipping a smile at Rebecca and making introductions.
After greeting Mr. Jenkins, Rebecca asked, “Are you saying there is another way to get here?”
At Adam’s nod, Rebecca laughed. “Oh my, I can imagine the look on Grandmother’s face when she realizes Dawson purposely misled her.”
“I warned Dawson of the consequences,” Adam said, laughing. He turned to Horace. “If you’re interested in seeing a Crane taken down a peg, just watch when my grandmother learns she could have come here in the comfort of a carriage.”
Horace Jenkins laughed and shook his head. “Sounds like something Dawson Crane would do.”
Adam nodded. “It does, but Grandmother is better for the adventure, and I’d bet my last dollar she’ll be glad we took the beach to get here.”
As their laughter settled, Horace gestured to the narrow set of stairs that wound around and around to the top of the lighthouse. “Shall we wait for Mr. Crane and your grandmother to arrive?”
“They may be a while yet. I think it’s safe to assume that Grandmother won’t be climbing anymore stairs today,” Adam said. He caught Rebecca’s hand. “Do you need to sit for a spell before we head up?”
“I don’t want to wait another minute, Adam.”
“You young folks go on up,” the keeper said. “I’ll be up after I greet Mr. Crane and your grandmother.”
That’s all Rebecca needed to hear. She was off toward the stairs like a breaking wave heading for shore.
Laughing at her single-minded pursuit, Adam caught her elbow. “You’d better save some of that energy, love, because you’re going to need it.”
“Race you to the top,” Rebecca said, stepping in front of him and purposely blocking the entrance to the narrow stairs.
“Oh-ho! You may soon regret leading the way as I won’t be in front of you to pull you along.”
“You’ll just have to push then,” she said, giggling as she bounded up several steps.
And off they went, climbing and teasing as if they were teens in the throes of a first romance. It wasn’t their first, of course. They had fallen in love once before—with each other—but for Rebecca it was all new and exciting.
Adam crowded her from behind, pretending he would pass her when they both knew it would be nearly impossible and highly dangerous if he succeeded. Gasping for breath, they circled around and up... around and up, until finally Rebecca stopped at the sixth level. Doubled forward, hands on her knees, she panted. “Should have... let you... lead,” she said, barely able to get the words out. “Can... barely... breathe.”
Laughing, Adam grasped her hand and pulled her down to sit on the stair tread. “I have no idea how... Horace and his... staff make this climb several times a day.”
With her hand pressed to her pounding heart, Rebecca rolled her head against the cool brick wall. “I can’t imagine it.” They sat for a minute just breathing.
“Want to see something remarkable?” Adam asked.
“Not if it involves climbing stairs.”
He laughed and squeezed her hand. “Just lean forward a bit and look down.”
Curious, Rebecca did as instructed—and she saw straight down the center of the circular staircase that went round and round and round to the bottom of the lighthouse. She cried out in alarm and threw herself back against the brick wall. Head spinning, she thought she might be sick. “Adam, please tell me these stairs will support us.” They seemed to have no scaffolding or support beams beneath them. A fall from this height was certain death.
“Of course, sweetheart. I’m sorry. I thought you would enjoy the sight.” He stroked her hand. “Horace and his staff tromp up and down these stairs several times a day. They keep them in magnificent repair. They’ll support us all the way to the top unless you’d rather turn back.”
She shook her head. “It just made me woozy. I’ll finish our climb as soon as things stop spinning.”
“That a girl.” He waited a couple of minutes then said, “Let’s go now so we can have a few minutes to gawk before Horace joins us.” Adam stood and helped her to her feet. “Watch your step and keep your eyes ahead of you. That should save you from toppling over the edge.”
“That’s incredibly reassuring,” she said, gripping the railing and continuing upward.
“I’m right here, darling. We’ll reach the top without the stairs collapsing.”
“We’ll never know it if they do,” she said, laughing as she continued the climb on tired, wobbly legs.
A few minutes later they reached the eighth level, breathing hard. They stepped into the service room lined with cupboard and tools. From there, Adam led Rebecca to another set of stairs and stopped her at the bottom.
“When we reach the top of these stairs we’ll be outside. It might be a little like looking over the edge of the edge of the world. Are you ready for this?” he asked.
She nodded, still quite breathless. “Just hold onto me.”
“Always,” he said. With that, he swept her into his arms and ascended the stairs.
Stunned, Rebecca gripped his shoulders. “What are you doing, Adam?”
“We’ll reach the top together, darling.” With that he took the final two steps and brought them to an outside balcony called a gallery that encircled the lantern room where the glass encased beacon of light resided.
All Rebecca could see was the long stretch of beach and miles and miles of blue ocean. “Oh, my...”
Slowly, he lowered her feet to the decking.
She stood beside him simply awestruck as her spirit soared like a seagull into the sunny sky above. A multitude of fishing boats dotted the shoreline and looked the size of pitch barrels from this height. She could see the shops at Crane Landing and the twin rivers and the bay and how they connected with the ocean. Huge, rolling waves struck the rocky shoals below, roaring and frothing as they broke across the shore. The rickety cliff-side steps that she had climbed were directly below. To her right she noticed a little inlet with a hidden boat dock and two rowboats bobbing in the water. The keeper’s large sturdy home sat on a grass-topped hill above the cove. Other small buildings that Rebecca couldn’t identify were located nearby. Finally, her gaze dropped straight down the towering lighthouse, making her head woozy and her stomach light. With a small gasp, she stepped away from the sturdy railing that surrounded the gallery.
Adam took her in his arms and steadied her. “May I suggest that you avoid looking straight down from this height?”
“Duly noted,” she said, releasing a light laugh. “Have I always been this sensitive to heights?”
“Not that I recall, but then we’ve never climbed this high before. You did enjoy climbing our trees at home.” He briskly rubbed her arms. “You’re trembling.”
“Well, I just scared the stuffing out of myself. And those trees I apparently used to climb have big limbs to hold onto and to break my fall.”
He chuckled and hugged her. “You’re safe here, darling. I won’t let you go.”
For a few minutes they stood, her back to his chest, taking in the expansive view of lush green woodlands and the Crane River that cut a winding path to the rocky beach where they merged with the cobalt blue ocean.
They watched together as a merchant schooner, sails unfurled, made is way out of the bay into the open Atlantic waters. The three-mast vessel rode the waves with ease. The men on deck moved like a colony of ants, the deck glistening with ocean spray and sunshine.
Safe in Adam’s arms, Rebecca allowed her gaze to return to the crashing waves below. “I’m beginning to understand why you would be concerned about the construction and durability of your sailing vessel rather than the romance of the journey. I’d only envisioned billowing sails and a vast, shimmering ocean of calm water, not those powerful waves pounding the rocks below.”
“The voyage is a lot more romantic if you don’t become fish bait,” he said.
She laughed. “I can’t argue that logic. Goodness, how small Crane Landing appears from this height. Perhaps it’s because I’m seeing more of the ocean that makes it appear so. Up here the world is so vast and... exciting,” she said. “Standing here in the wind makes me feel like I have wings.” She turned to face Adam. “I feel this way when I ride Star. Is that what sailing on a schooner is like?”
“Hmmm... sailing is like... it’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced,” he answered, his voice going soft. “At first it’s exciting and you want to race the wind, and then when you’re bounding across the waves you realize how powerful the ocean is and how insignificant and vulnerable you are... and then you grow quiet with respect. Time disappears and you become one with the ocean and it fills you up like wind in a sail. Suddenly, it’s just this moment and this wave and this snap of the sail.”
They fell silent, both of them enjoying a moment that needed no words.
“Do sailors ever tire of the ocean?” she asked eventually.
“I think they tire of the work and being away from their families, but I believe most of them love the ocean like a mistress. You’ve heard the saying that a sailor is married to the sea, right?”
She nodded, taking in all he’d said. “I’m beginning to see the attraction.”
“You’re my ocean, Rebecca.” His kiss was brief, but as powerful as the waves crashing into the shore below. “You are magnificence and mystery and pleasure and danger, and when I’m with you all I can see, or hear, or feel is... now... this moment. I love you, Rebecca, and I’m ready to sail with you. Let’s marry when we get back to Fredonia.”
“Oh, Adam...” She gazed into the beautiful dark depths of his eyes and saw his steadfast love and promise of home, and heaven help her but she wanted to say yes. She wanted to sail an ocean with him and build a home right here in Crane Landing. “I wonder if this is what Princess Cecily felt when Gabriel Crane swept her off on their incredible journey,” she said, because although she wanted to say yes, she didn’t think she should.
“I suspect she was scared but trusted that Gabe loved her and would do anything for her.” Adam stroked Rebecca’s cheek. “I’ll protect you and love you, Rebecca. You can trust in me and in our love.”
“Hello? You two up there, Adam?” The keeper’s warning call from below startled them apart.
Adam’s eyes closed for a brief second, as if the man’s timing couldn’t have been worse.
For Rebecca, the keeper’s call had been well-timed.
Horace Jenkins emerged onto the gallery deck where Rebecca pretended to be studying the shoreline. “Quite a sight isn’t it?” he asked, barely out of breath.
“It’s beyond words,” she said honestly. So was Adam’s profession of love. If looking over the tower’s edge had made her dizzy, Adam’s declaration had made her swoon. How could she have possibly waited all these years to marry him? Rebecca wished she hadn’t waited because now it left her with an impossible decision. She wanted to say yes, but knew she should say no.
As her gaze roved the shoreline, she released a startled gasp. A lone woman walked the beach just south of the lighthouse. Buffeted by the stiff breeze, the woman’s red hair whipped around her head, and her yellow dress flapped around her legs as she strode the shore.
“Ah, you’ve spied my daughter,” Horace said.
Stunned, Rebecca glanced at the man. “You see her?”
“Clearly,” he said. “She often walks this time of day.”
Rebecca turned her eyes to Adam. He nodded that he understood and assured her she wasn’t seeing things. Shifting her attention back to the keeper’s daughter, Rebecca studied the gal for several long seconds, wondering if the keeper’s daughter was the same woman Rebecca had seen on the beach near the shipyard.
“Is that your mystery woman?” Adam asked quietly near her ear.
Rebecca shrugged. It was impossible to determine. “Perhaps,” she said, but she felt far less than certain.
“Would you like to know a little about the workings of a lighthouse?” Mr. Jenkins asked.
“I would indeed,” Rebecca said, dredging up a smile for the kind man. “I’m particularly intrigued by that massive craggy looking piece of glass that is rotating in that open cupola.”
Her description gave Mr. Jenkins a good laugh. Adam, who had apparently visited the lighthouse before, smiled at her as if she were a sweet, naïve student.
“That’s our Fresnel lens, and the reason it looks ‘craggy’ is because those small sections of glass are angled to refract light. It’s a large prism that can reflect a small amount of light over many miles. I’ve had sailors tell me they can see our beacon twenty miles out,” he said, sounding like a proud parent.
“That’s incredible,” Rebecca said, eyeing the huge glass globe. “I understand how it might reflect the sunlight, but I don’t see where the light would come from at night.”
“Well, unless we’re experiencing a nasty storm and poor visibility during daylight sailors navigate by our colors. Every lighthouse along the coast has a different color pattern. Each lighthouse uses a different light signal, too, and our light comes from a flame inside the globe,” he said. “Our lamp emits three flashes every three seconds and that tells mariners they are off shore at Crane Landing at the southern end of Maine.”
Intrigued, she studied the lamp house and large lens. “That is just so... clever.”
Mr. Jenkins was a man who took great pride in his job and loved to share his lighthouse with others. He told Rebecca how he and his staff of three keep the oil lamps cleaned of soot and filled with oil they brought up from the oil house—one of the small outbuildings she’d seen below. They replaced and trimmed the wicks and kept everything cleaned, including the grounds and their rescue boats, which they had used a number of times, even though it wasn’t their paid responsibility to pull stranded sailors from the ocean. It was their job to sound the fog bell and keep log books and report hazards and wrecks. “Our lighthouse saves lives,” he said in a serious and somewhat grave voice. “I fished these waters for ten years before I sold my fishing boat years ago and took this job. I know how dangerous it is out there, so I do my best to give those men on the water all the help I can. It’s my job to warn them of danger, especially unseen hazards.”
She looked at Adam. “I didn’t realize there was so much involved in tending a lighthouse.” To Mr. Jenkins she said, “Thank you for the education, but more so for helping to keep people safe. I am in awe of all you do here.”
Mr. Jenkins blushed so hard his ears turned red, and he mumbled a thank you before he moved toward the stairs. “Shall we head back? Your grandmother is waiting below for you.”
Rebecca cast a last longing look at the ocean she hoped to cross one day. She wanted to sail to Enlightsia, to the home of Princess Cecily, someday with Adam.
As Adam guided her to the stairs, Rebecca knew she wanted to marry this beautiful man. She wanted all he offered her, and she wanted to give as much in return. But with her hallucinations and irrational thinking, what sort of wife would she be? What sort of mother? The harm she could cause herself was one thing. To carry that responsibility for a husband and dependent children was something altogether different.
As she descended the steps inside the lighthouse her thoughts went round and round, exhausting her with their ceaseless circling. She longed for a life with Adam, but her conscience acted like a rudder that steered her away from a possible disaster. If Adam realized what monsters swam in the dark caverns of her mind, would he throw her back like a bad catch? Head down, she prayed she would find a lighthouse at the end of her journey instead of an asylum and a broken heart.