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“INCOMING!” I HEARD the head trauma nurse call out.
We were ready. I was already dressed in my gown with my gloves on. “Bring him in,” I said calmly as the paramedics rolled a patient into Trauma One. From the moment I laid eyes on my patient, I was already assessing him. I listened to the medics spout out his vitals and pertinent information.
I stepped to the side of the bed as he was transferred from the gurney to our hospital bed. The adrenaline I’d felt dissipated. This man was not critical. He was bloodied from a cut on his head, but he was looking directly at me.
“You’re going to be fine,” I told him, and gently patted his arm. “We’re going to check you from tip to top to be sure. What happened?”
“Skateboarding,” he said with a cocky smile.
I nodded as I tapped against his belly. “You were knocked out?”
“That’s what my buddy says.” He grimaced when I touched the arm that was obviously broken. “He got it all on video. I can’t wait to see it. I bet it’s going to go viral. I’m going to be a star.”
I studied his face, which was covered with blood, and cocked my head to the side. “I’ve seen you before, haven’t I?”
“Yes, ma’am.” He grinned and flashed teeth stained with his own blood. “I’d never forget the face of the hottest doctor in LA.”
It wasn’t exactly the first time I’d been hit on while at work. I was one of the younger doctors in the ED and young men – usually young, but there’d been a few older guys that seemed to forget their manners – liked to flirt. I rarely paid much attention to the compliments. Often, patients were already hopped up on pain meds by the time I saw them. Delirious with pain, shock, and pharmaceuticals.
“All right, Casanova,” I said. “Don’t move, and let me check you out.”
“Check me out, doc.” He grinned.
After quickly assessing his injuries, I stepped back and gave out orders to the nurses. The man looked fine and didn’t require my attention. I was off work in ten minutes. He would be passed off to the next doctor while all the tests I ordered were being run. I stepped out of the room while the nurses took care of him and ordered the x-rays he would need to be cleared.
“I thought that was going to be a bad one,” Tammy, the head nurse, said from behind the desk.
“Me too.” I nodded. “All that blood. It always looks bad.”
“The paramedics called it in as a priority,” she said. “Sorry to get your blood pumping only to be disappointed.”
I laughed as I recorded the information on the man’s digital chart. “Trust me, I’m not disappointed to have gotten an easy case. A complicated trauma would not get me out of here on time.”
“You’re never out of here on time,” she laughed.
“I am today,” I said. “I’ve actually got plans.
“Are you really going to leave on time?” she asked with feigned shock.
“I hope so,” I said, and checked the clock. “Assuming no one else comes through that door.”
“Keep your fingers and toes crossed,” she laughed. “You know it never works out that way.”
“I know, but today, I need it to. I am already dreaming of a sandy beach with the sun beating down on my naked body. I won’t have a waiter to deliver me drinks, but I’ll pretend I’m sipping a Mai Tai.”
“Dr. Kingston!” she exclaimed. “You naughty, naughty girl.”
“It’s about time I was naughty,” I said with my stylus in hand. I was scanning the charts of the patients still in the ED. “I need this vacation. If I don’t unwind, I’m seriously going to explode.”
“It’s been too long,” she said. “I’m glad you’re getting some time. Where are you going? You said it was somewhere very private.”
I looked up and grinned. “Very, very private. It’s an island off the coast of Maine. It’s totally off the grid and rustic. I’m not taking my cell. Nothing. No internet. No TV. Nothing.”
She looked horrified. “Why in the world would you do that?”
“Because I need to unplug and reset,” I told her. “I’ve been busting my ass for thirty of my thirty-four years. It’s been ten years since I took any kind of vacation. I’m so ready to curl up with a book and listen to the ocean. No background noise. No sirens. No one paging me. Just blissful peace.”
“How long are you going to be there?” she asked.
This was the part I knew would really freak her out. “I reserved the cottage for a month.”
Her eyes damn near popped out of her head. “A month! You’re going to go a month without your cell phone?”
“Yes.” I nodded. “I might get tired of the quiet after a week or two and go into town, but I don’t think I will. I really need this time. It’s been—” I stopped short of telling her why I wanted to get away. “I need it.”
“You’re the hardest working doctor in this hospital,” she said with a smile. “You deserve it. We’ll miss you around here.”
“I’ll miss you, and I’ll probably miss the job, but all I can think about is getting out of here.”
“Is it a legit private island?” she asked. “Like, you’re going to be out there all by yourself?”
“Yes.” I grinned. “Complete solitude.”
“How are you going to eat?” she asked. “Drink? What are you going to do for a month?”
“There’s a guy that brings groceries once a week,” I explained. “I already did my grocery order.”
“But what if you need to run to the store for something?” she asked. “What if you get hurt and need help? What if you get sick?”
“You sound like a very overprotective mother,” I teased. “If I need anything, I’ll figure out how to do without. If I get sick, I’ll ride it out. I’m a doctor. I’m healthy. There is an emergency flare I can shoot up if the island sinks or something like that.”
“I always suspected you were just a little off,” she laughed. “Only you could think deserting yourself on an island would be a good time.”
“The best time,” I said.
“Have you ever done that before?” she asked. “Gone off into the wild by yourself?”
“No,” I said with a shake of my head. “That’s why I’m so excited to do it. It’s a new adventure.”
“A new adventure is moving to a new city or taking a new job,” she joked. “You’re going off the grid in every sense of the word. You’re a city girl. You’ve been born and raised in the city. How are you going to survive?”
“You’re making it sound like I’m going to live in a tent on a deserted island. It’s a house, cottage rather. Running water, electricity, food, and everything I need. Most of all, privacy. Complete, total privacy.”
“All right, all right,” she said with her hands up. “I won’t bug you about your very unconventional vacation choices. Are you at least going to take your cell phone in case of emergency?”
“Nope.” I smiled. “No service.”
“What about taking pictures?” she asked. “You have to take some pictures of this place.”
“I don’t know,” I shrugged. “I might. I think part of the beauty of it is the fact you can only remember it. You don’t get pictures. If I want to remember it, I’ll have to close my eyes to do it.”
“I suppose,” she said with a shake of your head. “It’s your show.”
“Thank you. I will try and get a picture of the place, but I’m not going to take hundreds.”
She walked around the desk and gave me a hug. “All right. You do whatever you have to. Have fun. It is kind of exciting that you’re doing what suits you and no one else. Take care of yourself.”
I finished up with my charts, checked on the skateboarding kid and declared myself officially off duty. As I walked to the parking garage, I felt free. I was officially on vacation. It had been way too long since I took any real time off. Too long since I did something for me and me alone. This was the first time I was taking time off work to actually just do nothing at all.
I couldn’t wait to be on the beach on the other side of the country. California had amazing beaches, but there were people everywhere. I couldn’t wait to be alone. Most people went on vacation and visited touristy hotspots. Not me. I saw people all day every day. Usually, I met people on their worst days. It was rarely pleasant. Ten years of working in the emergency department of a busy hospital as an intern and through residency had taken a toll. The constant pain and suffering and even death weighed on me like a heavy cloak. I had to find a way to get rid of it or I was going to burn out before I reached my thirty-fifth birthday.
I took off my white coat and tossed it in the backseat of my car before getting behind the wheel and heading home to my two-bedroom condo. One day I was going to buy a house out of the city, but for now, it was the condo. The only reason I was able to afford the place was because of my inheritance from my parents.
I walked at a fast clip through the lobby and hopped on the elevator. I was already thinking about what I needed to do. I wasn’t leaving until first thing in the morning. I needed to pack and clean up. Tomorrow was going to be a long day and I wanted to be well rested. I was coming off a thirty-six-hour shift and needed to catch up on some sleep. I would sleep on the plane as well.
“Alexa, what’s the weather like in coastal Maine?” I asked as I kicked off my shoes.
I listened to the forecast and smiled. It was going to be beautiful this time of year. Early summer with hopefully no chance of violent storms. I was used to being on my own and doing things for myself, but even I was a little afraid of Mother Nature. Being alone on a somewhat deserted island with no connection to the outside world was enough of a challenge.
I stripped out of the clothes I’d been wearing for almost two days and tossed them on the floor to deal with later. I needed a shower. I stepped into my modern shower with high water pressure and wondered what it was going to be like to go primitive. The cottage had running water and solar electricity with a generator for backup. I had searched for the right place and while there were plenty of bigger and more luxurious places, I had chosen the little one-bedroom cottage.
I stepped out of the shower and dressed in my usual sleep pants and threw on a shirt before I started a load of laundry. That was going to be the tricky thing about the cabin. There weren’t any laundry facilities. I was going to be there for a month, which meant I had to pack enough clothes to last a month without completely stinking myself up. The owner of the cottage advised I go into town once a week with the grocery delivery man, but I didn’t want to leave the island. I would wash my clothes in the sink if I had to. Considering I was going to be on a private island, clothing was optional anyway.
I started a load of laundry and then got busy packing. I didn’t need a bunch of fancy outfits. Bikinis, shorts, and tees were going to be my attire for the next thirty days. I threw in a couple of sweaters for cool nights and then packed my toiletries bag.
“Anything else?” I asked aloud. “What am I forgetting?”
I scanned my bedroom and tried to think of what else I might need. There was nothing. This was a very stripped-down vacation. I only needed the essentials. I left my bags by the front door and after finishing up cleaning my apartment, I headed for bed. I was so excited for tomorrow. I was anxious to be alone, even though I was alone most of the time. The island was going to be a different kind of alone.
It was probably silly, but I felt like I had to center myself. I felt adrift. I needed to take a timeout from life and get my head straight. Everyone I worked with would never know I was in an internal battle. Things in my life were great to anyone looking at it from the outside. I was good at hiding my feelings. I was great at plodding along and pretending everything was all right.
“Go to sleep,” I told myself.
I closed my eyes and tried like hell to sleep. My brain was moving a million miles a minute. I was going through my travel list, thinking about the patients I’d seen over the last two days, and imagining the cottage and the quiet. All simultaneously. I had the proverbial hamster wheel going in my head. Despite the pre-vacation jitters, I was smiling. It was the first time I had truly smiled in weeks.
“This is going to be so good,” I whispered.