‘I Will Not Utter Your Name Again’

Rage

I will not utter your name again.
I will not work as you ask any more.

The more words I use, the more absurd this becomes.
I speak of your attributes and find flaws of my own speech.

Who is going to make all those trips to your house and back
Any more? Certainly not me!

Says Tuka, haven’t I got all that I want
Right here with me?

(Tukaram: Dilip Chitre)

I shouldn’t speak, but the situation compels me
The whole world goes hoarse appealing to you

O conjuror who has spread out this vast show
I know you are really a beggar worth nothing

Having become your dependents, we have become shameless
And therefore we put up with you

We do not know how you will contrive
To end all this clamour created by us

Says Tuka, you are fair indeed! My Lord,
You accept my service without any response

(Tukaram: Dilip Chitre)

You haven’t yet paid me my price, my wages due,
Let us see who wins when it’s time to settle our accounts

As for me, I am so desperate, I have staked my whole life,
I wonder if you have such guts

So far, O Hari, you have cheated millions at this game
But I am something else, I won’t let you escape

I suffered a lot before I came across you
And learnt your name and identity

That was the mistake I made just once, says Tuka,
Now I am going to square with you

(Tukaram: Dilip Chitre)

Get lost, you dirty flirt
I don’t need you any more
You have deceit stamped all over you —
the telltale smears of a woman’s kohl
red smudges from her lips
and paint from her feet
tell their own sordid story.

How could you visit her?
Tell me, whose wife,
whose daughter was she?
Your fingers are bereft of their precious rings —
did she loot them to give you her company?
You seem fatigued, your eyes swollen —
didn’t she allow you a wink of sleep?
And the lacerations on your skin,
did she scratch you with her bangles
in the course of your fevered lovemaking?

What of my sacrifices, you shameless rogue?
I risked my reputation, suffered indignities
to win your affection.

Salabega says, but wasn’t it
your own lack of caution, Radha?
The lady messenger you sent
to your lover last evening,
where is she this morning?

(Salabega: Prabhanjan Mishra)

When I’m done being angry,
then I’ll make love.
Right now, you should be glad
I’m listening.

When you flash that big smile,
I smile back. It doesn’t mean I’m not angry.
You keep looking at me,
so I look too. It isn’t right
to ignore the boss.

Right now you should be glad.

You say something, and I answer.
That doesn’t make it a conversation.
You call me to bed, I don’t make a fuss.
But unless I want it myself,
it doesn’t count as love.

Right now you should be glad.

You hug me, I hug you back.
You can see I’m still burning.
I can’t help it, god on the hill,
if I’m engulfed in your passion.

Right now you should be glad.

(Annamacharya: V Narayana Rao and David Shulman)

Good that we’ve found out
What makes you Almighty!
Now nobody can keep it
A secret.

Why did you beat me up until now?
Now
You and I
Are equal.

Whatever we call you
Is your quality.
At times, I will even
Curse you.

Shame on you! You have no pedigree!
You are casteless! You are a thief!
You are the son of a whore,
As everyone knows!

Says Nama, I am hopping mad now!
I’ll fight with you
With the frenzied mouth
Of a maniac!

(Namdev: Dilip Chitre)