Maddy shut the gallery door behind her and turned the sign to ‘closed’. Her mother would understand the need for an early closure. She’d left Harry on the pavement dejected. She tidied the gallery, moving a couple of display easels back into place, standing up the one that had been knocked over, her hands still shaking with the shock and adrenaline coursing through her. The police would be in touch. Connor would be charged and pay the penalty for his actions. This reassured Maddy — he would no longer be able to hurt her or her family. She would phone her parents once she had gathered her thoughts to let them know what had happened today. But why did she still feel so terrible?
Harry.
Had she sounded ungrateful? She hoped not. He’d saved her, been a true hero – yet again.
Seeing him again — his dark wavy hair, the dimple in his chin, his towering build and those sincere blue eyes — had all come as such a shock. Her memories were distorted. He was even more gorgeous in the flesh than she’d remembered, during all those weeks she’d clung to his memory. The heat and scent that radiated from him she’d totally forgotten, being so busy with her family. During the incident with Connor, she hadn’t really had the time to process her surprise at seeing Harry again. Connor’s actions had spun all rational thoughts out of her mind.
Maddy couldn’t stop the tears from falling. Like all her feelings — hate, love, disappointment, trust, fear — her anger could be held in no more. It’s just shock. She didn’t know what to do for the best. If she pushed Harry away now, would she regret it? But could she trust him not to hurt her again?
She should at least listen to what he’d got to say. She might regret never knowing his side of the story, why he’d disappeared. They would eventually have to live opposite one another again, be neighbours. She liked answers, the truth. It had been eating away at her the past few weeks why he’d left, where had he gone … the not knowing. Only the past couple of weeks with her mother had stopped these thoughts. But they still crept in occasionally, when she was left on her own, when it was quiet … or when she went to bed. She would lie there, churning over her thoughts, speculating about what had caused their separation. If she didn’t speak to him, she would continue to dwell on it for months to come.
‘Why has the door got the ‘closed’ sign on it?’ Angel walked into the gallery, returning from her lunch break, confusion on her face. ‘Oh, what’s happened? You look terrible!’ Maddy tried to wipe her face with some tissues she’d grabbed out of a box by the till, and blew her nose.
‘There’s been an incident. If you don’t mind, I’m going to go home. I need to see my parents. We’ve caught the man who pushed my mother down the steps.’
‘Oh, God, I’ve missed all the action. Look, you go, I can lock up. Sandra sometimes leaves me to it on quieter days.’
‘Are you sure?’ Maddy’s earlier tiredness was nothing compared to how she felt now – physically and mentally exhausted, all energy drained from her. One way or other, the gallery was closing. Maddy didn’t have the strength to stand on her feet for much longer. She needed to go home, to bed, but not before she had filled her parents in about today, though.
‘Yes, go. I’ll even open up tomorrow.’
‘Thank you.’ Out of habit, Maddy checked her mobile. She’d got used to it being quiet since Harry had left, so was surprised to see a text. It was from Harry.
Maddy, please let me tell you my story. Afterwards, if you want nothing more to do with me, I will just be your neighbour and friend. Love H x
***
In the cab of his truck, Harry sat and stared at his phone on the dash, willing it to message him back, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. He’d even turned it off and on again, in case it had lost signal. Sometimes phones did that. No message from Maddy arrived, but then she could be busy in the gallery. He’d moved the truck out of Clifton to near the Clifton Downs where it was free to park.
Should he drive back to Cornwall or find a hotel here in Bristol? Would he need to give her more time? He could drive to her parents and wait for her there … but would that make her angrier? Hell, he didn’t want to turn into Connor, becoming obsessive and a stalker. But he wanted Maddy to know how he felt about her – without looking like a weirdo. If he chased too much, she could run away for good, but if he didn’t do enough, then would she think he wasn’t really interested?
Had he put enough in the text message? Should he have told her he loved her?
Harry thumped the steering wheel, yanked open the truck door, then slammed it and kicked the tyre, yelling out in frustration. It echoed down across the green open space. He startled an older woman, walking past the houses on the other side of the road, who put her head down and quickened her step, pulling her coat around her tighter.
‘Sorry!’ Harry called out to the woman. But she ignored him and carried on, still faster.
Harry didn’t know what to do. He knew this was like a giant fork in his life. Would his actions take him in the right direction?
Whatever’s meant to be is meant to be.
Right?
He so badly wanted Maddy to be meant to be.
He hated his PTSD; he hated that he’d fled and not faced Maddy. What if he’d irretrievably fucked this up? Harry wanted to punch something, anything … anger and frustration building back up inside of him. But he’d learnt a long time ago – the hard way – that punching immovable objects like brick walls or trees (as he was surrounded by some) hurt, and adding a broken hand to his problems would not help his current situation in the slightest. Especially as, if everything else failed, he needed to get back to his landscaping business.
His phone started ringing. He couldn’t hear it from outside of the truck, but he could see it flashing in its phone cradle on the dashboard. The caller ID said Maddy. In his frantic movement to get to it, pulling open the door, he clumsily dropped the phone as he snatched at it. Harry let out another yell of frustration as he fumbled for the phone in the foot-well. Nothing was going right. Nothing. By the time he answered, it had rung off; she’d gone to voicemail. He didn’t want to know if she’d left a message or not, he just dialled the number back. To his relief, it rang. She answered quickly.
‘Harry?’
‘Yes, sorry, didn’t get to the phone in time. You called me?’ Harry winced. He couldn’t string his words together. What did he say? Fear gripped him: he mustn’t say the wrong thing.
‘Yes, yes … where are you?’
‘In my truck, parked on Clifton Down.’ He sat back down behind the steering wheel. ‘I don’t know whether to drive home or not. I don’t know what to do for the best, Maddy.’
‘Neither do I. Look, stay where you are, I’ll come find you.’
‘Okay.’ Harry nodded, not that Maddy could see it. Some relief rippled through him that he hadn’t left for Cornwall. Maddy wanted to talk.
‘See you in ten minutes.’
Harry slipped his phone into his pocket, and stood outside his truck, watching the traffic, waiting for her. His body tensed. Thoughts went round and round in his mind. What to say, how to say it … This was it; this was the crucial fork in the road of his life. Would Maddy be going with him, or going the other way, alone?
***
Maddy hoped the police wouldn’t contact her parents before she got home, but however tired and terrible she felt, she needed to speak to Harry. Since she’d walked back into the gallery and left him on the pavement, he was all she could think about. The sadness in his expression, when she’d brushed him aside, haunted her. He’d come all this way too, to find her, to speak to her. He had saved her from Connor. She should give him this time. She’d be lying to herself if she said she didn’t want to know why he’d disappeared. Of course she wanted answers.
As she drove, the Downs were on her left, so she kept an eye out for Harry’s truck. She spotted it not that far along, and she saw Harry standing outside, waving at her. Unfortunately, she couldn’t park next to him and had to drive a couple of hundred yards until she found a parking space. A quick check in the vanity mirror in her overhead sun visor showed her she didn’t look like she’d been crying anymore. Ideally, she would have liked to have put some more make-up on because she was conscious she did look a mess. Rummaging in her handbag, she found her hairbrush, and gave her hair a quick brush through, tidying her ponytail. Surely, she should have done this at the gallery? As she put the brush back, she spied a lip-gloss, so hastily applied some.
After a deep breath, and a check in her wing mirror, Maddy hurried out of her car and shut the door, locking it. She stepped across the grass verge and onto the path and headed towards Harry, who was walking towards her.
‘Hey,’ she said as she met him.
‘Hey.’
‘Let’s walk this way.’ Maddy pointed to where the path forked through some trees. ‘There’s a bench around the corner.’
‘Okay, I’ll follow you.’ He gestured with his hand.
They walked silently for a while. It was awkward. What should they say, where did they begin? Then Maddy remembered earlier events and how Harry had come to her rescue.
‘Look, I’m sorry about earlier. I don’t know if I conveyed it to you properly, but I was very grateful for you stepping in with Connor.’
‘I wasn’t going to stand by and let him hurt you, Maddy.’
‘I know.’ She’d never felt unsafe with Harry. From the day he’d thrown her over his shoulder, he’d done everything in his power to make her feel safe, protected.
It seemed odd walking side by side and not holding Harry’s hand, or even linking an arm through his. She missed the closeness too, longing to touch him. But would it be a show of weakness? She hadn’t decided yet what she would do. Maybe he knew not to impose on her boundaries, as he had his hands tucked into his jeans pockets, looking awkward and tense as he walked. Maddy held the strap of her handbag slung over her shoulder. Yes, he was an attractive man, yes she fancied him like crazy, but he’d hurt her, and was capable of doing it again. She would listen to what he had to say before she made any decisions. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t had enough practice listening to bullshit. Connor had given her a qualification in it. NVQ level 3 in bullshit detecting.
The trees cleared and they came out onto a small green, the path continuing around, with a spectacular view of the Clifton Suspension Bridge. To Maddy’s relief, the bench on the corner was empty, and she gestured for Harry to head towards it. With the blue sky and a scatter of clouds like white candyfloss, it really was a spectacular sight.
‘Wow,’ Harry said. ‘Impressive view.’
‘Yes, Bristol’s landmark,’ Maddy said. ‘Paris has the Eiffel Tower; Bristol has the Clifton Suspension Bridge. Not sure if anyone actually proposes here, though.’
Harry chuckled. Maddy sat down on the bench while Harry walked over to survey the view. Up by the fence, you could look down into the Avon Gorge and across to the city. She let him take his time, sensing he had something big to tell her. He had been quite closed off to her about some areas of his past. When she came to think about it, she realised she knew relatively little about him.
Harry finally strolled towards her, his lips pursed together, a determined expression on his face. Then her mobile phone rang.
‘Shit.’ Unzipping her bag, she grabbed her phone and saw it was her mother. ‘Sorry, I’d better take this, it’s Mum,’ she said to Harry. He showed no disappointment in his expression, only concern. ‘Hi, Mum.’
‘Where are you, darling? I called the gallery and Angel said you’d come home. But you’re not back, so now I’m worried. What happened at the gallery? Angel said some man attacked you. Was it Harry? I feel wretched because I told him where the gallery was—’
‘No, it wasn’t Harry. It was Connor, Mum. Look, I’m with Harry now. I was coming home, I’m so exhausted, but I needed to talk to Harry first. Then I will come home and tell you all about it. Connor is with the police.’
‘That scoundrel.’ Sandra started off on one of her rants. Maddy pulled the phone away from her ear, rolling her eyes at Harry, who smiled, trying to make light of what was really a serious situation.
‘Mum! Mum, we’ll talk when I get home. But I can assure you I am safe, okay?’
‘Okay, dear. Maybe you should have called your mother first, though?’
‘Yes, yes, sorry.’ Maddy felt fifteen again. Did her mother not realise she was twenty-seven?
Maddy switched off her mobile to prevent any more disturbances and placed it in her handbag. Harry took a seat beside her, but there was still distance between them. She sat on one end of the bench, and he on the other. How had they drifted so far apart?