Jinx
that talent with illusions and talent with oil paints were two very different things. Her hands, so deft with illusions, lacked the coordination she needed to accurately depict the image in her mind. Jinx’s perfectionism for the smallest of details frustrated her to the point that she forced herself to take several breaks.
After painting, Apollo took Jinx to eat at the Lonesome Dove, a small restaurant that offered food to go. Ever the gentlemen, Apollo paid. Jinx thanked him and told him she would have offered if she had money, yet he brushed her words away like it was nothing. He then surprised her with tickets to a street play down in Wateredge. The “stage” consisted of a sandy beach lit up by torches; the rest of the setting was up to the imagination of the audience.
A standing ovation later, Jinx dragged Apollo to a bar, admitting that she wanted a drink. Apollo led her to a bar lounge, stacked to the brim with merry singing people. Their faces were red and puffy as they sloshed their drinks and spilled them all over the sticky wooden floor. The place reeked of sweat, beer, and cigarettes.
“Is this what you wanted?” Apollo asked, closing the door behind her and keeping his head down.
Jinx inhaled the unsavory smells. “Yes.”
Breaking through the sea of happy drunkards, Jinx’s shoulders tightened, and the hair on her neck stood on end. Instinctively, she scanned the room for a threat, suddenly wary of her surroundings. Seeking reassurance, she reached for the dagger, resting cold against her leg.
Something, someone was watching her, watching them. Studying them.
Her hand curled around the fabric of her skirt, the material grazing up her leg as she pulled the dagger from its sheath. She shifted her weight up on the balls of her feet, ready to pounce if needed.
A warm hand touched her lower back, calming her and guiding her forward. “You’re safe. Nothing will happen,” Apollo said. They found a couch next to a coffee table tucked in the corner and perched themselves there. “What do you want to drink?”
“Surprise me,” Jinx said with a grin. Then her smile suddenly dropped. “Are you going to have something?” She’d forgotten all about how he’d promised her that she would abstain from alcohol and cigarettes. By bringing him into the bar, she’d put him in a tough spot.
“Polly, we can go. I didn’t even think about your pact.”
Apollo stood up from the couch, straightening his jacket. “I’m fine. I’m not even interested in that anymore. I’ve been feeling a lot better lately; I’ll just have a water tonight.”
A minute later, he returned with two glasses filled with clear-colored liquid in one hand and an empty glass in the other. She sniffed the liquid in the glass he handed her and cringed. “Novak?”
Novak was a strong, clear liquor that tasted like pure rubbing alcohol. Mixed with ginger beer, lemon, and mint, it morphed into a classic Somnium cocktail. But the alcohol content could be lethal, especially if you were drinking it alone.
Apollo sipped his water. “Better if you just drink it.” He set his elbow on his thighs, a coin clasped between his fingers.
“What’s the empty glass for?” Jinx knocked back a bit of her drink. The dry bitterness stung her tongue, and she smacked her lips together. “This is awful. You drink this stuff?”
Apollo’s lips kicked up. “Only on a bad day.”
“Then why am I drinking it?” Jinx protested, shaking her head as if it would help to get rid of the taste.
“Because you wanted to go to a bar, and at bars people get drunk. This is the quickest way to do it.” He held up the Marc between them, drawing attention to his perfect, long hands. “Now, we’re going to play a game of speed, Marc. Kovan taught me how to play years ago, and we used to play it a lot with Thatcher. How good are you at holding your liquor?”
She glanced past the coin, facing him head-on and squinting her eyes. “Good enough. Being a Cursed has certain benefits.”
Apollo nodded and proceeded to explain the rules of the game. Each player was to hold a Marc and attempt to bounce it off the table into the empty glass. Whoever was able to land the coin in their glass first won the round, and the loser would take a drink. The winner then either added a new rule to the game or compelled the loser to do a dare. The game ultimately ends when the opponent resigns due to being inebriated.
To show her an example of how it worked, Apollo flicked his wrist, dropping the coin on the surface of the table. In this singular flick, the Marc landed perfectly in the short glass.
Suspicion glazed over her. “Well, this is unfair. If I win a round, you face no penalty—you’re just drinking water. And if you win, I drown in liquor.”
“Alright.” His monotone voice took on a sultry charm. “What would you like my penalty to be?”
“What is a food you despise?”
“Olives. Tch. They’re Akuji’s work.”
“Are you lying?” she asked apprehensively.
Apollo solemnly crossed a hand over his heart. “I swear on the Virtues. They should not even exist.”
Jinx jutted out her pinky. “Promise you’re telling the truth.” He hooked his finger around hers, and Jinx bit her lower lip, reluctant to show a hint of her malicious smile. “That will be your punishment. Eat an olive instead of taking a shot of Novak.”
He muttered the phrase “devil woman” under his breath and then ordered a bowl of olives. He promptly slid them away on the far side of the table, unable to tolerate their presence.
Apollo counted down from ten. After “one,” Jinx and Apollo slapped their Marcs on the table, repeatedly flicking their wrists until the first coin pinged inside the glass. Apollo gave her a knowing side-glance; he’d won the round.
“Wipe that smug look off your face, Polly. This is only the first of many.” She drank the Novak down in a gulp, squirming the instant it touched her mouth. “What’s my dare or rule?”
The liquor warmed her system. She leaned into the comfort.
Apollo looked around the bar, a mischievous glint in his eye mischievous behind his typically stony glare. He crossed one leg over the other. “Your rule is that you must reveal a new fact about yourself every time you call me ‘Polly.’”
“Easy.”
Up for another round, coins sang once again, clanging against the table. Jinx’s wrist protested as her heart raced. She could feel the competitiveness rising up in her chest—the primal urge to win, to beat him. And then, a ding, as Jinx’s Marc landed in the dead center of her glass.
“Eat up.” She pushed the bowl of olives his way, smiling as his jaw clenched. Apollo stabbed one with a toothpick and inspected it first, his nose wrinkling. “Having regrets?”
“No,” he assured her. Apollo hesitantly gave in, chewing once before swallowing it whole. He just wanted to get through it as quickly as possible, but he couldn’t help pressing a fist to his mouth. Jinx snickered. Apollo shook his head, running a hand through his hair. “Let’s go again.”
And so, they did. Olives and drinks were ingested. Apollo visibly convulsed after his eighth olive, and Jinx felt her world spinning on its axis after her tenth drink. Though it was harder for a Cursed to get drunk in the first place, once they were intoxicated, the effects multiplied tenfold.
Jinx’s limbs grew heavier, and her mind felt lighter. She could tell her motions were no longer as slick as an alley cat; they were now riddled with the sloppiness of toddlers taking their first steps. She accidentally dropped Apollo’s nickname twice in the duration of the game, revealing stupid little secrets that held no meaning. An example would be Jinx’s guilty pleasure of overly graphic romance novels. Then, Apollo’s Marc hit the glass again. Another drink for Jinx.
At this point, she couldn’t distinguish the taste of Novak from that of water. Both ran smoothly down her throat. “Jokes on you, Polly! I’m immune.” Heavily leaning toward him, she was finding it harder and harder to keep her eyes open. She gasped, noticing she had said his nickname again.
Apollo smirked, the three creases folding at the end of his lips. It was so beautiful. He was so beautiful—in an almost divine way.
Jinx reached out to touch the creases. “My secret is that I enjoy these. Very much.”
She caressed a thumb over the lines, cradling his jaw, fond of the way his warmth mingled with hers.
She let out a giggle. “You’re incredibly warm. You’re flushed!” Grabbing his entire face, she touched Apollo’s pink cheeks. A faint glow of red caught her eye. She clutched his long, soft fingers, brushing against the ring.
The second she made contact with the metal, a vibration ran through her veins, shooting right to the organ where her magic resided. Tremors reached the nape of her neck, stopping her breath for a second. Then, as soon as it had arrived, the feeling was gone.
She grabbed his hand and put it against her own cheek, leaning into him. Any tension that resided in her body disappeared.
For the first time in a long time, Jinx felt safe. She felt as if she had a place. A home. A person. Someone who she could trust.
Jinx wasn’t afraid to be unapologetically herself, but she couldn’t deny that the life she lived was often lonely. And that’s all she ever wished for. Companionship. She wanted to tell Apollo everything. No lies, no walls between them. She wanted to give someone the chance to really know her, not just the illusions she assumed and the roles she played.
Veyda Collymore had been a façade for Jinx, but slowly, over time, the lines distinguishing the two from each other blurred. She wasn’t acting all the time anymore; she was able to show her true colors from time to time. She was so much more than just the Ghost, the face-stealer, the criminal, the trickster illusionist. She was more than all that.
“I want to show you one last thing before the night ends,” she told him somberly.
Entwining her fingers through his, she hauled him out of the bar into a nearby alley. The autumn breeze beckoned her toward the skies, cooling her neck. Her fingers brushed against the grainy grooves of the limestone wall. “How good are you at climbing?”
“You’re too intoxicated for this. Not to mention your shoulder is still healing.” As he spoke, his voice hummed against her skin.
Before she knew what she was doing, Jinx found herself cocooned within Apollo’s arms, which wrapped around her frame protectively. He placed his chin on the top of her head. “You smell good, Polly.”
“And you have no scent at all. How is that?”
She snuggled deeper into him. Her legs were so tired. “It’s something that came along with my magic. I’m untraceable.” Opening her eyes, she noticed a pulldown ladder at the far end of the wall. “Come.”
She stumbled, giggling, and was hardly able to see straight, but she needed to be in the sky. On a roof. Overlooking the city. Her shoulder ached slightly as she climbed, Apollo right behind her. Each pull of her bicep drained out the liquor, each breath of fresh air helping her mental clarity return.
Once her foot fell flat on the roof, the alcohol left her system completely, and her senses awakened, as if her body knew that being up here required her undivided attention. Over her shoulder, Apollo hauled his leg up to the roof. “You’re not afraid of heights, are you?”
Flaying out his arms for balance, he slowly stood up. “I have to say…I’m not sure.”
Jinx brought Apollo closer to the edge, where they could see every district of the city from the highest point of the Northern Summit as it touched the clouds and far across to the Woodland trees, which loomed high above the city.
In the far west, nestled between the dark trees and the smoking Crosspoint Yard, she spotted the place she’d come from. “You see the little run-down, cottage-like houses?” She pointed toward the Slums. “I was born in the poorest of parts, in the Slums. My backyard was the first tree of the Woodlands. Mother and I struggled terribly when I was young.”
Apollo cut her off. “Before you go on, I want to make sure this is something you really want to tell me. Not just some confession you will regret tomorrow because the liquor loosened your tongue.”
Her heart flipped. “I want to tell you.”
Apollo’s lips kicked to one side, and he gave her a curt nod.
The wind whistled, dragging its finger through her hair. Jinx released the band, holding her hair up, and obsidian waves cascaded over her shoulders and down her back. “Mother struggled to bring in enough money for our meals. My uncle often had to lend us what he could, but he, too, was struggling; he barely made a living. Our house had nothing more than a small kitchen, a table, and a bed. A curtain split the bed from the rest of the house. Mother slept on the floor and gave me the mattress because we wouldn’t fit on it together.”
Her mouth dried, her hands trembling with a force that could bring down the summit. Apollo just held her, signaling that he was there for her whether she wanted to continue or not.
She did. “Over fires every winter, people would talk about a creature that would grant them wishes. Once, when I was eight, I overheard my mother crying to my uncle, saying there was barely enough for us to eat and that she’d have to pick up a third job. My uncle needed to pick up a second as it was. And all of this was just to sustain me. That night, I went out to the Woodlands in search of the creature that I heard so many people talk about.”
A single tear dribbled down her cheek. “I searched the entire night until it found me.” Her breath shook as she continued telling the story that no one knew. “It was a horrifying thing to look at, a demon that belonged only in nightmares. I almost turned back, but the image of my mom suffering was worse than that thing standing before me. So, I asked it for money. I begged it to help me save my family.”
Jinx covered her mouth and bit her cheek as she felt a waterfall of tears gathering behind her eyes. She struggled to push the words out behind her locked teeth. The pain she’d kept in her heart for years yearned to be set free, to finally see the light. “Do you know what it said to me?” Her voice broke, and she fought to calm her stammering heart. “It said that it would give my mother and my uncle all the wealth they required as long as I didn’t return to them. I had to exchange my love for their money. There was one loophole, however; if I could solve a simple riddle before my twenty-first birthday, I could return home to them again. If I fail, I’ll never be able to see them again; they’ll forget me entirely. I couldn’t even speak to them if I tried. It would kill my mother.
“I accepted the demon’s terms because I thought sacrificing my life would be better for my mother and my uncle. So, in many ways, I am Cursed entirely of my own design. Unlike the rest of the Cursed, I was never infected by the plague and never got sick. My sickness comes from a deal that I struck on my own terms.
“That night, after I left the woods, I saw a banker approaching our cottage. He offered to invest in my uncle’s printing press, and it changed his life and my mother’s forever. But I knew I couldn’t step foot in the cottage again. Months afterward, my uncle and mother moved in together into a manor in Wateredge, and once they were settled, I began to practice my newfound abilities, pretending to be other people. I’m not sure why exactly I’d been given these abilities, seeing as I didn’t ask for them; I never questioned it, however. I believe the creature wanted to give me a tool to survive somehow in the open dangers of Somnium. Since the roof over my head was stripped from me. Although now that I think of it, I’m not sure why it agreed to my deal at all. The creature would have gotten nothing from it. Once I felt ready, I took my first job as Jinx and assumed the role of Cheshire the Great in Akuji’s cirque. I did small jobs here and there, eating and stealing whatever I could. Then came my ninth birthday.
“I thought that the monster would at least erase my mother’s memories, making it so that she didn’t remember I even existed, but that’s not what happened. I watched my mom cry to the point of delusion and my uncle as well, on that birthday and every birthday after that, missing me. At that point, I honestly didn’t know if I’d done the right thing in accepting this deal. Maybe my mother would have been happier to just have her daughter, even if money would be a constant struggle. But at least we would have had each other. As I grew up, I became more and more desperate to solve this riddle, to return to my family. The creature reminded me every birthday just how much time I had left, and it felt more and more hopeless with each passing year.
“At some point along the way, I gave up on ever solving the riddle and forced myself to believe that it didn’t matter, that my mother was better off without me. Because who would want to live with a daughter who had become one of the terrors of the city? I’ve killed and tortured people. I’ve stopped feeling something when I take a life. I’ve done countless horrid things, become a monster myself.”
Violent trembles overtook Jinx. The pressure behind her eyes became unbearable as tears escaped from her lids. She could no longer hold them back. “I was a reckless teenager. I wanted to be seen, to be known somehow. And so I was Elijah Benjamin, Sophia Acadaine, Cheshire the Great. I stole from the military and deceived others, never giving a second thought about the impact my actions had on other people. I put people in jail and toyed with their minds as if they were mine to control. I blackmail and murder. I steal and then give a portion of whatever I take to the Cursed who cannot fend for themselves.
“A couple of weeks before your birthday, I turned twenty, and the creature visited me for the last time, holding up a single finger. Something within me changed, and I decided to give it one last shot. I wanted to go home. I wanted to see my mother. That day, I saw my mother crying as she lit a birthday candle for me. Then you walked past me, and I began trailing you, watching your every move.
“I didn’t expect this to turn into friendship. You are my last hope, Polly.”
Apollo clasped her chin within his fingers, wiping the tears from her soaked, swollen cheeks. His features were soft and vulnerable, void of the dark, stoic edge she’d come to know so well. “I will do everything in my power to help you. Even if I die trying.”
Jinx’s shoulders softened, her body going limp as her knees gave out. Apollo collapsed into her. Jinx buried her head into his neck, and he held her, soothing her and caressing the back of her head. “Thank you for trusting me,” he whispered.
“Thank you.” She lifted her watery gaze to meet his. “For being my friend.”
Apollo leaned back, taking her with him. They rested for a few minutes in silence on the rooftop, the blanket of stars as their only witness.
Jinx’s heart calmed and lightened, the weight she often carried with her slowly vanishing. She finally felt like she was able to breathe again.
A star twinkled. “You know, I don’t think you’re a monster. And I believe your mother would love you just the way you are. You will always be her daughter, after all. I can assure you; she’d want you to be nothing more or less.”
Perhaps Apollo was right. Even if he was, it did not completely take away the fear of her mother’s shame. She could not deny who she’d become. A person who was no longer phased by murder, theft, or crime. What would it be like when they saw each other again? Would it be like she’d never left, or would everything be different, clumsy, strange?
“What is your plan once you go home? What comes after that?” he asked, leading her out of the whirlwind of her thoughts.
She shrugged. “I’m not sure. I’ve been so focused on returning this past month I didn’t think much about what would come after. I guess I’d want to be with my mother as much as I can. I’ve missed her dearly. But I guess, in the end, I’ll always be a thief.”
The ocean waves lapped against the wall of Wateredge, their noisy crashes blurring into a calming sound. “Would you want to work? Would you present yourself as an eligible bride for the season?”
Jinx laughed. “I’m not sure. This time I just don’t have a plan. I’ll just…live.”
“Good plan.” His chest became a pillow for her head, his heart and pulse ticking faster than that of a scared animal. The outside veil of him, however, remained calm and cool. “Would you let me see you?”
“Missing me already?” she teased.
“Tch.” In Apollo Voclaine’s dialect, she knew that was a yes.