March 1997. Lula Mae with no clothes on is a feast for the eye and two or three other senses. Max is grazing quietly on her when she says, ‘Max?’
‘What, Lula Mae?’
‘How come you’re here with me?’
‘What a question!’
‘I don’t want the obvious answer — most men like a bit of strange and most men who see me want to have me. I’m looking for the you/me specifics that resulted in our sleeping together for what is now the fifth time. Don’t you wonder where it’s coming from and where it’s going?’
‘When I’m with you I’m not thinking of that,’ says Max.
‘What about when you’re not with me?’
‘Then I try not to think of it.’
‘Say more.’
‘Much of the time I don’t understand what I do. And all of the time I don’t understand my life. Do you understand yours?’
‘Until now I don’t think I’ve tried to. What about you and Lola?’
‘What do you want to know?’
‘Yes.’
‘And is she in love with you?’
‘Looks that way.’
‘You’re not sure?’
‘She’s very careful with words.’
‘But you’ve slept with her, yes?’
‘I feel disloyal, talking about her like this.’
‘That’s a hot one: you don’t feel disloyal shagging me but you don’t like to talk about her while you’re in my bed.’
‘Life is full of anomalies, Lula Mae.’
‘You haven’t answered my question.’
‘OK, I’ve slept with her.’
At this point Max’s mind is unable to refrain from a little cluck of disapproval.
‘What?’ says Max.
‘You know very well what,’ says his mind. ‘Shtupping Lula Mae is already an intrusion into Lola’s privacy but this kind of talk makes it worse.’
‘Lola’s privacy!’
‘That’s right. Your nakedness and your lovemaking are private to Lola. Now you’ve exposed Lola’s nakedness to Lula Mae.’ Another little cluck.
‘I’m not a good man,’ says Max.
‘Could do better,’ says his mind.
‘Hello?’ says Lula Mae. ‘Are you there?’
‘More or less,’ says Max.
‘If you and Lola are in love,’ says Lula Mae, ‘why did you look me up in Holborn?’
‘You told me where you worked and then you gave me your going-away view. I’d have had to be dead not to respond.’
‘OK, that was one time. What about since then? What are you looking for with me?’
‘I don’t know. I guess I’m just greedy. What about you? Your attractions aren’t just physical, you could pretty well have any man you fancied. Why are you spending time with me?’
‘When it started I was a little bit trying to make up for all the girls you couldn’t get in high school. Your face is full of never-had-enough and I was touched by it.’
‘And the greatest of these is charity,’ says Max. ‘You’re a real Christian, Lula Mae.’
‘In my way. But now it’s become something else.’
‘What?’
‘I haven’t figured it out yet, but it’s got me taking a long hard look at myself.’
‘And what are you seeing?’
‘A woman who’s been walking through a maze where all the pathways bring you out again and you never reach the centre.’
‘What’s at the centre?’
‘Maybe I’ll never know. In the meantime …’ She rolls over on to Max and he stops asking questions.