THOMAS
I checked the goddamn hour again, this time using the decorative clock above the dry bar cabinet in my living room.
Keeping time was becoming a compulsion, a new behavior for me that had Katie’s name written all over it.
Katie. She hadn’t replied to my text messages, to my dinner invite.
That morning at the coffeehouse, I’d allowed her to deny me her last name, her address. No questions, no prying into her family background, no searching for her personal details. I’d agreed to those terms.
In truth, the information would be quite easy for me to find. I’d spent years working for my father and my brothers, aiding their missions by hacking into government and private networks to acquire data and locate people.
But I had given her my word, and I would keep it.
Katie’s request worked for me as well.
I wasn’t prepared to discuss the shit I’d done in the past, the crimes I’d committed, the men I’d beaten, threatened, or the lives taken in the name of my family. I didn’t want to tell her how darkness lived in my soul.
She was perceptive. She would see it.
Good. Let her see everything through her own eyes, I thought.
She needed to know my sins, so she could choose to live with them or run from them.
“Reed has no obvious affiliation to any political organization that would tie him to the prime minister,” my brother said, his voice as clear as if he were standing in front of me rather than thousands of miles away.
Christ, I missed him. Will and I were close, and we operated on a level that resembled a well-oiled machine when it came to our father’s field training. He was the one person I’d always been able to count on. He’d protected me from our father, taking the lion’s share of the old man’s cruelty onto himself.
And I’d thanked my brother by hurting him.
He forgave me for allowing myself to develop feelings for his wife, trusted me to work that shit out of my system. And I had purged those inappropriate feelings, recognizing that my admiration for her was quite different than the intense connection that had nearly wrecked me when I first saw Katie.
I was still forgiving myself.
I poured and finished two fingers of Macallan in one swallow, hoping the burn would punish me.
“His father was British,” I said, trading the empty whisky glass for my mobile phone. “I’ll investigate that angle and look into the connections his father might have had before his death. My gut says, Reed is in possession of some damaging information, and the prime minister wants it shut down.”
“Sounds about right. What approach are you taking with Reed’s wife?”
“I’m heading to her office now. I want to know what her role is in this game. My sources tell me she’s quite a political force. I can’t imagine she’s uninvolved while her husband is engaged in matters linked to the prime minister, a man who’s so deeply rooted in politics.”
“One more thing, Thomas. The director general mentioned the Reeds have a child. As the investigation progresses, if the situation requires it, provide protection detail for the child. I don’t give a fuck what the Reeds get themselves into or what happens to either of them in the end, but you keep that child safe.”
We disconnected, and I turned my wrist to check the time.
Still no reply from Katie.
Another couple of fingers of scotch. My mood was spiraling. I tipped back and swallowed, opening my throat for the full pour.
The hour was early enough, and I planned to keep the meeting with Carolyn Reed brief. The rest of the evening could be turned round.
If Katie agreed to see me, the night would end well.
Before leaving my flat, I sent her another text message.
Tell me where to find you.
Nothing came back. No text-reply alert. No Katie.
I grabbed my jacket and my helmet and headed down to the parking garage. Sprinting across the garage pavement, I jumped onto my bike and sped outside onto the street, into the light.
Sunshine flooded the room, waking me after less than four hours of sleep. The timer on the electric window blinds had failed again.
Clinking glasses and silver, the smell of coffee.
My housekeeper was bustling about in the kitchen.
Christ. I raised my arm, shielding my face from the daylight.
The night before had been rough after not hearing from Katie, and it had taken quite a lot to keep myself from giving in and searching for her. But as I’d sat in the tattoo shop like the miserable fuck that I was, I’d found a better understanding of the unexpected position I’d taken with her.
I was as desperate for Katie’s trust as I was for her touch. Gaining her confidence was necessary if she were to choose to be with a man like me. So, in a manner that was completely out of character for me, I’d give her a taste of what I would sacrifice to have her, to make her choose me.
God help her, she was already mine.
I rotated my arm to look at the tattoo. A bird in flight, its wings spread wide. The third sparrow on my body. The two others on my chest represented strength and family honor. This one was different. It was a female, and she carried a delicate wildflower.
My father had taken me to get inked on my eighteenth birthday, my first—our family shield on my right shoulder. I’d been quite thrilled at the time, proud to follow in my brothers’ footsteps and receive a Hastings rite of passage.
Looking back, I’d had no choice. I’d been his soldier.
No more.
I hopped out of bed.
My ink. My money. My power.
After hitting the shower, settling arrangements with Carl, and making a quick stop to grab some gear, I rolled up to the curb in front of Jack’s Coffeehouse on my motorbike. I cut the engine, removed my helmet, and pushed my fingers through my hair.
Though it was the weekend, instinct told me Katie was inside.
Her mind worked like mine. She was a mathematician.
But I’d sensed that she’d grown up quite isolated, which meant the patterns she lived with in her head were often her only companions. The isolation combined with the habits she kept through no fault of her own equated to a rather small footprint.
My pretty little bird lived inside a cage, and she’d led me to it.
Pain sliced through the center of my chest, sharp, sudden, and then gone.
I needed to know why her family had insulated her from the rest of the world. She was beautiful. Brilliant. She deserved adoration, for fuck’s sake, not separation.
I swung my leg over the bike to dismount but stayed there on the street. My plan didn’t include going inside for coffee again. I needed to touch her.
Impatient, on edge, I reached into my jacket for my mobile phone. No fucking around with text messages this time. Katie would hear my voice and obey me.
She would come to me.
As I tapped on the screen to wake it, an incoming call popped up.
A smirk hit my mouth, and I said her name aloud.
Five minutes later, Katie stepped onto the pavement, and my breath caught up in my chest for a second. My instinctive drive to defend flexed, triggered by the turning heads, the gaping second looks.
Christ, she had no idea that she affected other human beings. The sheltered lifestyle she lived did more harm than good.
A violent urge rumbled in my gut, encouraging me to shove through the pedestrian traffic and secure her tightly in my arms, to keep her safe. I pushed back on the impulse and waited her out, waited for her to find me.
“Ride with me, Katie,” I said, reaching for her hand.
She nodded and locked her eyes on to mine, revealing the same exquisitely painful combination of yearning and obedience that had nearly put me on my knees the day I’d first met her.
I grinned, drawing her close to me.
It didn’t matter that she’d never ridden before. I’d assumed as much. The important thing was her willingness. She’d chosen to get on a bike with me, agreed to my plan, proving that the trust I wanted her to surrender was coming along.
After allowing myself a minute to take in the unintended sensuality of her bare shoulders, her berry-stained lips, I forced my gaze back to her eyes.
She was breathtaking.
Leaning in closer, I wanted to reassure her. And I wanted to taste her lips.
We were close, so close that I could feel the warmth coming from her body, but with Katie, I needed her to show me with her touch that she was all in with me.
I’d sensed her innocence from the first moment. Mathematics was everything, the only thing her parents had allowed her to experience. I wanted her to know how easily a few simple words could be twisted in the absence of physical intention, that she should give active consent to a man as well as verbal.
I gripped her neck with force, lowering my mouth to hers, not to kiss her, but in warning. “Understand, sweetheart, I’m not the kind of man you want to tease.”
She deserved a kinder man. But it was too late for that. I no longer planned to back away from this, from her.
How clever she was, catching on so quickly, this time running her fingers over my jaw, cupping my chin while whispering about her desire for me to kiss her rather than placing an order from a menu.
I kissed her fingers first and then her lips, a hint of sweet coconut lingering there from her latte.
Once I outfitted her in the leather jacket and helmet that I’d picked up for her and advised her on how she would ride with me, how I wanted her body to fall into sync with mine, we found ourselves lost in our connection for a minute.
Her eyes were stunning. As I held her stare, they revealed the loveliest soul.
I’m going to ruin this woman, goddamn it.
My chest tightened. I pulled away from her.
Katie reached for my hand and curled her little finger round mine. “I want this, Thomas. Let’s go to the park.”
That small touch. Her soft, approving smile.
She was the light I needed to move forward with my life.
An impulse consumed me, and I lurched forward, jerking her face up to mine, tugging her bottom lip between mine, sucking, tasting, owning, inhaling her exhaled gasp. I wanted her mouth, all of it. But I’d wait until we were off the street.
She pressed her palm on my chest and smiled from beneath her lashes.
I winked and then twisted round to the bike for her helmet. Before putting it on her, I said, “Let’s get on with our day, beautiful.”
I positioned us on the bike, and as we passed through Central Park, looped round Morningside, and then rode north along the motorway toward Fort Tryon, Katie clung to me with her body pressed tightly against my back, her arms wrapped round my waist.
The closer we got to Tryon, the more relaxed she became, one of her hands moving about to explore my abdomen without ever releasing her hold on me, as I’d instructed.
I grinned. I could turn back and take her to my place right then, and she wouldn’t stop me.
Take it slow, motherfucker. You’ll scare her.
Katie was different than all the other women. Her mind was brilliant but also guided by empathy. Her body and her soul were pure—this I knew instinctively. The goodness about her soothed me, gave me peace.
It had killed me to pull away from her lips. Those lips.
Concentrate on the road.
The Fort Tryon sign appeared as we rounded a tree-lined curve.
Katie shouted out in excitement.
I shook my head, smiling.
She turned her head and rested the side of her helmet against my shoulder.
Having Katie’s thighs squeezing my arse, her arms hugging my waist, feeling the exhilaration move through her as she experienced the freedom of the open road with me—the intimacy of it all was making me mad for her.
I needed her, and I needed her to want me.
Entering Fort Tryon, I maneuvered to the car park and cut the engine next to my Escalade, and then we removed our helmets. I’d meant to help Katie dismount, but she popped off the bike on her own and into my arms the moment I was standing as well.
“That was amazing, Thomas. I loved it,” she said, her bright smile so close to mine.
“That makes me happy, Katie.”
Nothing could have stopped me from kissing her. I pushed my lips against hers and spun us round in the sunshine once, twice.
I set her on her feet, touched her cheek with the back of my fingers. “We’ll eat something first, and then you can show me round this place. Are you hungry?”
“I’m starving. You brought food?”
“Of course.” I winked.
My housekeeper and Carl had prepared everything.
I opened the Escalade and found the blanket I’d requested along with a basket that was packed with food for the day. A small ice chest, holding bottled water and sodas, sat next to the basket. After tossing the helmets and jackets inside, I grabbed our supplies and led Katie toward the lawns.
“Are you sure I can’t help carry anything?” she asked again.
“No, Katie. You’re not carrying shit. Ask again, and I’ll put you over my shoulder and carry you as well.”
She laughed and looped her arm through mine. “All right. I like walking, so you win.” Her eyes and fingertips moved over the new tat on my arm. “Does it hurt? Oh, there’s something covering it.”
“It’s a transparent dressing, quite like a waterproof bandage. There’s a stinging sensation at the time, some sensitivity for a few days.”
She moved gracefully as she took one end of the blanket to help spread it out, bending over to set the corner. Her sweater neckline dropped, and I caught a glimpse of the top of her breasts, pushed up by a lacy pink bra. Her hair swept round her shoulders then like a silky curtain, covering her chest. But in that fraction of a moment, my cock had responded.
I lowered onto my knees and pulled her down to the blanket with me. “There are some vegan options in the basket. I wasn’t sure. We haven’t talked about that, Katie.”
“You mean, because of the coconut milk? I’m not vegan. It’s a dairy allergy. I love to explore different foods.” Katie dug into the basket with enthusiasm.
Christ, that smile had the ammunition to ruin me in one day.
Watching her methodically sort items and plate them for us, I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “You counted them,” I said.
“The grapes, yes. Sometimes, I can’t help it.” She popped one into her mouth and then pushed one into mine.
I nodded. I would be damned to let another second pass without kissing her again. The food could wait. I needed her mouth more. I tugged on the ends of her hair just hard enough to let her know what I wanted.
She dragged her teeth across her bottom lip.
Ah, fuck.
If we weren’t in a location with others nearby, I would have punished her with a hard kiss for that move. As it was, I gripped the back of her head and pulled her face close to mine.
“Thomas,” she said softly, her breath sweet and warm on my cheek.
“You need to understand how this goes with me. I’m not like the boys at university. I can be a real fucking bastard. But even on my worst day, Katie, no one could ever satisfy you better or give you more than I will.”
A small gasp came from her perfect mouth.
I nipped at her ear before going on. “I promised to wait, to allow you to come to me about your background. However, there’s one thing I need, and I will not wait for that …”