AWAY

I WALKED THIS NEIGHBORHOOD—FROM LUIS’S APARTMENT all the way to my house—the last few nights, and all I thought about was how good this made me feel. How cool Luis was. How he was the opposite of what people at school thought. How Carlos clearly had no idea what he was talking about.

Well, tonight Luis proved Carlos right.

Tonight Luis is exactly the person everyone thinks he is.

And tonight this place is scary as hell. Headlights glaring in my face. The shriek of screeching tires. Voices in the dark. Each sound is a threat that Frankie or some crazy gangster is gonna jump out and kill me.

I walk faster for a few steps, then break into a full run. I do all I can to get farther from Luis, farther from the stupid fucking poem, farther from trying, farther from caring. Because when you try and when you care … that’s when you get your ass kicked.

I imagine a big scar on my neck getting bigger and bigger. I run faster, all the way across Pac Highway and down the hill to my world.

To safety.

I burst into the house breathing hard.

“Samuel?”

I ignore Ginny.

“GOOD-BYE, SAM!”

I try to ignore Gilbert.

I slam my bedroom door. Bury myself in the covers.

I don’t even look at the boom box. There’s no escaping the truth tonight. Of all the millions of people in the world who could possibly be my friend, that thug was the best I could do.

It was never gonna work.

I knew that.

I saw the bloody train wreck coming from a mile away.

And I hopped on for the ride.

Who does that?

Lonely fucking losers. That’s who.