La festa della Madonna on the last weekend of September transformed Valle del Sole every year from a sleepy peasant village into a carnival town. Three days of festivities—music, dancing, processions, fireworks—to cap off the summer and to celebrate the harvest. People from neighbouring villages, from Rocca Secca, old residents from Rome and Naples, flocked into the village; day labourers working on distant farms took leaves of absence; migrants in the north, in Switzerland, in France, boarded crowded trains for the long journey home. Sometimes even a few Americani appeared, planning their return to their native village to coincide with la festa.
About a month before the festival, members of lu comitato della Madonna went around to each household in the village for la questua, the collection taken up to pay festival expenses, arriving in twos in their Sunday suits and summoning up their most proper Italian to make their plea. The poverty of many of the villagers sometimes made their job an uncomfortable one; but village loyalty assured that even the poorest families would reach into the pot or jug in which they kept their savings and separate out the expected number of notes with little hesitation. During the course of the year each village in the area had its own festival, in honour of its patron saint, and ancient rivalries ensured that the peasants would go hungry before they would allow their village to be outdone by one of its neighbours. La festa della Madonna was tied up in these rivalries in more ways than one: Valle del Sole’s original patron was St. Michael, whose feast fell on the 28th of September, but once when a cholera epidemic had decimated the population of Valle del Sole but not claimed a single victim from Castilucci, the villagers, jealous that Castilucci’s patron, St. Joseph, had been more powerful than their Michael, had applied to Rome for a change of saints. As their replacement they chose the Virgin, who had a long history of successful intercessions with a God who was sometimes distant and unapproachable; and though Rome had denied their request, they had finally made the change on their own authority, though they had kept the last weekend of September as their time of celebration.
These village rivalries, too, had led to a continual escalation in the lavishness of the festivities in the past few years, for though the peasants’ fortunes had not improved much, paesani who had had good fortune overseas had begun pouring their own wealth into the festivals. This year, in Valle del Sole, rumours were being whispered of a celebration such as had never been seen before in the region, because Salvatore Mancini, who had left Valle del Sole before the war to make his fortune in America, had sent the comitato a sum that would have made the Pope himself suck in his breath.
But in my grandfather’s house no sense of excitement had been building. Our kitchen had been strangely silent for that time of year; for though my grandfather seldom sat on the comitato himself, as mayor he presided over its selection in the spring and was usually kept well informed of its activities as the festival approached and called upon to settle the committee’s internal disputes, our kitchen often alive with heated debate well into the night. But this year no one had come, to wrangle over the timing of the fireworks or the number of chairs that should be rented from Rocca Secca or the sum that should be paid to the band; and when the members of the comitato had come to our door for la questua, my grandfather, instead of inviting them in, as he usually did, for a glass of amaretto, had simply handed them the usual donation without fanfare, and they had come and gone without so much as seating themselves at our table. In fact my grandfather was seldom at home now, leaving the house early in the morning to go up to Di Lucci’s and coming back only for meals, when he seldom spoke, retreating more and more each day into his grim silence. Once when I crossed town to buy some milk, I saw him sitting alone on Di Lucci’s terrace, staring into space like an old man, as if he had been put there to be kept out of the way, like the ageing parents set out by their daughters or daughters-in-law on upper balconies during the day, left there to mumble to themselves in the sun and flies. Despite my grandfather’s infirmities, his stooped gait, he had always seemed a man who had loomed large, who commanded respect; but now suddenly he seemed shrunken and small, as if some aura around him had faded or died.
My mother, too, had withdrawn into a shadowy silence. Since the day at the restaurant a veil seemed to have fallen between us, and for a while I had nursed this estrangement like a precious wound I could somehow turn to advantage; but the passing days brought only a growing awkwardness, as if my mother and I had suddenly become strangers, with no words now to bridge the silence between us. My mother had developed a sudden interest in our garden, staying out there sometimes from early morning till nightfall, hoeing, watering, coming in only to prepare our silent meals, smelling of dirt and sweat, her hands growing daily more calloused and rough. But though the garden, under her silent ministrations, grew daily more healthy and lush, watered carefully now and properly weeded, the lushness seemed more show than substance, the quick growth of leaves rather than the fattening of tomatoes and peppers and grapes which were already ripe or ripening by that late time in the season. The sese di vacca—Roman tomatoes, cow’s teats, as we called them—had opened some new flowers, small throbs of yellow in the garden’s green; but the fruit would have no time to ripen before the first frost.
I spent my time alone now, waiting for something to happen that would restore the normalcy of things, for the festival, for school to begin in October. At school, at least, I could see Fabrizio, who was busy now helping his father in the fields. Fabrizio was really my only regular friend in the village, though he was a year older than me and wasn’t like me at all, wasn’t shy and could make people laugh. He always walked with an exaggerated swagger, belly protruding, knees pointing outward, nose and chin upward, a faded brown corduroy cap which he took off only in school and church, when he stuffed it into his back pocket, worn well back on his head, with an odd sideways tilt; and he had only two pairs of knickers, one green and one blue, which underwent a bimonthly rotation, like phases of the moon, two weeks green, two weeks blue, even in winter, when he came to school with his bare calves white and goose-pimpled from the cold, though he didn’t alter his swagger. His most prized possession was a jack-knife his uncle had brought him back from America, with a big blade at one end and a small one at the other; and sometimes, during our walks on the mountain, he would let me use it to whittle or to carve my name into a tree.
Fabrizio and I had been friends since the summer before I’d started school, when he’d come out one day to the pasture where I was tending sheep to show me the welts on his back his father had given him for letting one of his sheep fall over a bluff.
‘Not bad, eh?’ he’d said, lifting his shirt. ‘He hit me fifteen times with his belt. I counted in my head to keep from crying. Then I said, “Now I’m just like Christ,” because they hit him too, and my father started hitting me again. If you don’t cry it makes them angrier, so I started crying to make him stop. Then my mother said, “Basta, Lui, you’re going to turn him into a cripple!” ’
That was the day, too, that Fabrizio had taught me to smoke, pulling two crumpled cigarettes from his shirt pocket and guiding me through my first puffs until the smoke began to pass down my throat with little resistance, the world slowly starting to orbit around the rock I was sitting on; and afterwards we’d spent an hour or so rolling and wrestling in the grass, laughing because sheep fell off cliffs, because fathers beat their sons, and because the world, for all its seeming stability, was actually spinning around at a tremendous speed, which only became apparent when you’d had a smoke. After that whenever Fabrizio saw me in the streets of Valle del Sole he’d call out ‘Ho, Vittò!’ in a husky bass and pat his belly, mimicking the bonhomie with which the men of the village often greeted each other.
I was surprised at first that Fabrizio attached himself to me — I had thought of him as someone who belonged to the gangs, those coteries that seemed always to form outside the world I lived in, as if they had secret meetings in the night. But I had figured him wrong: in fact he didn’t belong to any gang at all, only insinuated himself into this group or that, usually of younger kids, serving as ringleader for a few hours but then saying to me suddenly, in the middle of some game or exploit, ‘Come on, let’s go,’ and the two of us would wander out alone to lie in some pasture or wade along the shore of the river. With older boys he was cocky and defiant, and would get into fights, fights he didn’t win very often, since he wasn’t very big; but he’d pick himself off the ground, wipe off his knickers, and then walk away as if nothing had happened, not caring finally whether he’d won or lost.
Now, though, with the harvest, Fabrizio was out in the fields from dawn to dusk. I’d been out a few times to look for him, had shown him the one lira coin I’d gotten from Luciano, which I carried with me always now. But Fabrizio’s father, who was known in the village as Facciabrutta, Uglyface, would always find some reason to deliver a blow to the back of Fabrizio’s head whenever I went around; so I stopped going around. I spent my time instead closed up in my room, pretending to look over my schoolbooks in the hope that my mother would come up to check on me. I’d watch her sometimes through my balcony doors as she hoed in the garden, her hair pulled back now in a scarf, her breasts straining against her blouse as she bent forward to pluck out some weed; but then I’d retreat again to my bed and the silence of the house would wash over me, filling my head like a scream, crowding out my private thoughts. The silence seemed to issue from every nook and cranny of the house, to dissolve furnishings and walls and leave me suspended in a pure, electric emptiness, so volatile that the crunch of my mother’s hoe threatened to shatter the house to its foundations. Then at night, as I lay in the dark staring up at the cobwebs on the ceiling, I’d hear my mother’s quiet sobbing mingling with the sigh of the wind like something inhuman, as if the air could no longer carry any human sounds, all of them smothered into the earth by the silence.