Chapter Two

“Put your hands together for Tara Manson!”

I step into the spotlight. The audience is out there, though I can’t see them.

This moment is mine. I can say anything in my poems.

Have you ever faced fear

and jumped

into churning waters

So deep there is no bottom?

I have. At the waterslides.

There’s always a chuckle after I say that line. Maybe I look too heavy to be a waterslide type. Whatever. It’s my job to deliver the poem. The audience hears what they want to hear.

I change my voice so I sound like I’m in a commercial.

Splash Kingdom!

Your fun in the sun

place to plunge

in and away from

what really matters.

Then I go back to my normal voice.

So what

if the phone ringing

in your beach bag

needs to be answered.

Here, I point at the audience.

No. You don’t get it.

Not like a hey, hi, how’s it going?

    see you later, whatever

kind of call

but a message you need to get now

not tomorrow

not some other time

but right this second or

someone will die.

Then I start again, softly.

When fun calls

it’s wrong to ignore

sun and sweat

skin on skin

his lips on mine

my lips drinking him in

this wild ride down

slippery when wet

curves ahead.

Fun is all good, right?

Here’s where I speed up and get louder.

THIS is all that matters

because we only live once

and all that living

is churned and pushed into

one glorious afternoon at the

   waterslides.

You hear what I’m saying?

How can they hear what I’m saying? I can speak fast and loud, but they can’t really know what it was like that day last summer. One year ago—today. The whole, long, sun-baked day David and I played, splashed, laughed…while Hannah was—

The sound of fingers clicking moves through the audience. They think I’ve lost my place. This is their way of telling me to keep going.

Plunge feet first

Down Big Mountain

Time Tunnel

Jumbo Splash

Race and giggle

catch each other

and sprint to the snack stand

hot dogs and plastic cheese.

I ignore the ringing phone, for once.

Turn my back on her, for once.

Snap it shut. Click it off, for once.

Toss it under a damp towel

and forget

that outside this moment

in my heat-soaked day

a tragedy unfolds

one phone call away.

The applause washes over me. I dip in a modest bow.

Rick, the host, shakes my hand. “Careful going down the steps,” he says. “Judges, let’s see your scores for Miss Tara…”

He calls them out. The low score is a 7.1 and the high an 8.9. That should be enough to get me through to the second round of the poetry slam.

When I touch my fingertip to my cheek, it’s wet. When I touch my fingertip to my tongue, I taste salt.