Girls, we got a problem at this upcoming competition,” Coach Woods said to all of us at practice the next day.
Though we had our second big competition coming up, none of us wanted to be at the school on a Sunday. But when Coach sent out a message saying we needed to have an important meeting, we were all there on pins and needles wondering what was going on. Coach told us to stretch while she talked to Eva and Randal in her office. Now she was in front of us not looking happy at all.
“Competition cheerleading, just as with any sport, has academic responsibilities attached to it. The Georgia High School Sports Association has regulations that state you must have a two-point-o to compete in any sport. Two of our girls have fallen behind in this area and will not be able to compete. Thus we are going to have to adjust midstream.”
“Adjust midstream? Huh? Can’t we just pull out?” Hallie asked.
Coach Woods said, “No, you have ten days before the event to pull out. We are under that time period. So we’re locked in. If we forfeit now, we may forfeit state. Randal and Eva are both bases, so back spots will have to step it up when it comes to stunting. We might have to change some places around in the dance so that we don’t have holes, and on the tumbling passes …”
Randal was waving her hand and Coach acknowledged her. “Yes, Randal?”
“You don’t even need to say anything,” Whitney interrupted. “Because you can’t keep your grades up is why we’re in this situation. The only thing you need to be saying is that you’re sorry to all of us.”
“I am sorry,” Randal said sarcastically, “but I was just gonna remind Coach that I’m not a base, I’m a flyer.”
“Oh my gosh, that’s right, Randal. Now who’s going to go up high? Ella, you can do it,” Coach suggested.
In my mind I thought, “Oh no! Oh my gosh! Uh-uh.” It was not that I was scared to be in the air, but although I was flexible, when I did the heel stretch I could tell I needed a little work.
“And, Whitney, we don’t owe you any type of apology!” Eva shouted.
Whitney jabbed back, “Says the girl who’s failing.”
“Who says I’m failing? I can have a D and still not have a two-point-o, you idiot,” Eva said.
“Okay, let’s watch the name calling,” Coach said.
“And we can certainly see why she’s not an academic all-star. If something doesn’t go Eva’s way, all she wants to do is embarrass you by calling you names. Good for her,” Whitney said.
“You’re so sarcastic. You might as well say what you mean and shoot direct versus sliding undercover comments, which cut just as deep.” Eva rolled her eyes.
Coach said, “Girls, didn’t I tell you to settle down? We’ve got work to do.”
“Can I call my mom for her to come pick me up?” Eva said.
“Honey, you aren’t going anywhere. You are going to stay here and help us figure out this new formation. Besides, two weeks from now we have another competition, so you and Randal need to be here since we must practice for that as well,” Coach said, making sense.
“Learning two formations is gonna get so confusing,” Hallie said.
“We can do this, everybody,” Charli affirmed.
The week flew by like a Learjet. It was pretty uneventful. I was speaking to no one at my house. Leo and I decided to become lab partners in chemistry, so on even days when we had that class, I looked forward to seeing him. Practices were exhausting because we tried to make the routine that looked fabulous for twenty people look dynamic with just eighteen.
Game four was humdrum. It was an away game, and we played the sorriest team in our region. Seriously, I could have gone out there and sacked the slow quarterback who was practically my little brother’s size. We won, 56–0. On the bus on the way home, some of the cheerleaders were sitting with football players. I sat down, thinking that Eva was going to sit beside me, but she looked at me, rolled her eyes, and kept on walking to the back.
When Leo came on the bus, I started biting my lip. That was when I realized I wanted him to sit beside me, but he did not even look my way. When he got to my seat, he walked past it. I leaned my head against the window, yawned, and knew I needed to get some rest because we had a big competition in the morning. No need to stress over something that was not on anyway.
Then I heard his deep voice say, “No one’s sitting by you? I’d like to if that’s all right. I’ll bet my shoulder would feel much more comfortable than that window.”
I picked up my pom-poms and motioned for him to sit. His shoulders did feel good, better than any pillow I could remember. The sweet words he whispered in my ear made my pulse race.
“You are beautiful. Go to sleep,” Leo said, and I did.
At the next cheerleading competition, we were intimidated as soon as we walked into the place. It was at a school in Suwannee, Georgia, that was two times the size of ours. There were people everywhere. We knew we were going up against eleven schools. The other teams’ moms, siblings, and friends were wearing T-shirts that supported their school. They held signs to pump up their cheerleaders as well.
I think the last time we came to a meet we were too nervous to be aware of this. The only parents we had with us were Charli’s mom and Whitney’s mom. Other parents were working. Some of the other squads appeared to have football players in the audience cheering for them too. Our boys would probably laugh if we told them to come and support us. When we warmed up, we received all kinds of looks.
Though Eva and Randal could not perform, Coach still made them come. Maybe we should have left Eva at home because she wanted to go over to the squad that we knew was dynamic and go off. They were from John’s Creek and they had a medieval theme to their outfits and routine. Every girl on that squad had two back handsprings and a standing tuck in their routine. They had twenty-four girls and did six stunts in the air, which they held for five seconds each and never bobbled.
At least we had snacks on our table that said Lockwood Lions. At the last competition it was bare, and every other team had their table filled with goody bags. We were trying to keep up, but we still looked out of place.
“Okay, I’m ’bout to go over there and tell them to quit looking at us like we’re slaves. They act like they never seen an all-black squad. Goodness,” Eva said with a roll of her neck at the JC girls.
I stood up and got in Eva’s way. “You’re not going over there. You don’t even know those girls. Who cares what they think about us. You need to be helping us concentrate so we don’t go out there and get embarrassed—”
Eva snapped, “Oh, y’all are gonna get embarrassed. Y’all have been dropping stunts all week. What makes you think you can go out there and hit stuff you couldn’t hit before? How you practice is how you will perform … that’s what Coach Woods always taught us. I don’t even know why you’re doing it.”
“You’re so negative, Eva,” Hallie cried.
“I wasn’t talking to you. I was talking to my sister.”
“Well, quit being so negative,” I retorted.
Eva shoved me. “Get out of my way.”
I shoved her back. She pulled my hair. I pulled hers. The broiling altercation had been in the works for a while. The problem was we were in the holding room with three other squads, and we looked like barbarians. Whatever the teams thought of us, the reality we were showing them was worse.
“Eva and Ella, you all need to stop,” Whitney yelled.
We kept tussling. However, when one of the girls from John’s Creek yelled out, “I knew they were animals!” Eva and I froze, realizing we had crossed the line. We were raised better than this, and now our squad could possibly be disqualifed because of our actions. It was not good.
“Daddy, can you please just come and pick me up?” I cried when I got home from the competition where we were humiliated.
“Just calm down, Ella. I can’t understand what you’re saying.”
“You told me I could always call you and let you know if I needed something. Well, I don’t wanna stay here with Mom and Eva anymore. I want to move in with you, Dad. So can you please come and get me?”
I did not like that he hesitated on the phone for a second. Did that mean he wanted to say no but did not know how to break my heart? Did that mean he had to run it by Samantha, but he did not want me to wait? Did that mean he had to talk to my mom to make sure it was okay, but he was still so mad at her that he did not care what she thought? I did not know, but I needed him to make a decision. Actually, I needed him to change my life.
“I’m going to come and get you for now, but later we’ll have to—”
“Thanks, Daddy, thanks!” I cried.
“I’ll be leaving in five. Don’t think this is permanent; there are a lot of people to consider. This isn’t just a decision you and I can make.”
“Dad, I’m unhappy. You are my father. I haven’t lived with you for years, and you just came in here telling Mom you wanted us. Either you want me there or you don’t.”
“Like I said, I’m on my way, but you have to understand that this is not permanent. If you can’t get that, then I don’t need to come.”
“Okay, okay, just come,” I said, treating my dad like he was my peer.
“Watch your tone, Ella. I don’t know what’s going on over there, but I can clearly tell that you are upset. However, there are rules that you are going to have to abide by here.”
“It’s not like I won’t be respectful to your precious Samantha,” I sneered.
“Ella!” my dad thundered.
A couple of hours later, I was at my dad’s place. I was in heaven in my own room with my own adjoining bath and my own TV. Peace and quiet abounded. Everyone thought having a twin was wonderful, but it really was too much. We had to share everything.
I went downstairs to see what was in the kitchen for me to snack on. I did not get to walk all the way in. I heard my dad and Samantha arguing.
“Look, you could’ve asked me if it was okay for her to come. We’re in the middle of planning this big wedding. I needed that guest room to put a lot of the wedding things in. You should have seen the way she strolled in here. She was quite comfortable,” Samantha ranted.
My dad tried to calm her and said, “It’s not permanent. I told her that. I haven’t been able to talk to her mom about it. I haven’t been able to talk to you about it.”
“So you just took the kid from her apartment? We’re both attorneys, Calvin. That’s really crazy. Her mom has custody of her. What if she comes looking for her and calls the cops? And I don’t want Evan to get all attached and then she has to leave.”
“What’s wrong with him getting attached to his sister?” my dad defended.
Samantha just rolled her eyes. I had a suspicion that she wasn’t feeling me. Now that was confirmed. She never pushed my dad to get to know me because she wanted to be his only woman.
“You want me to go tell my daughter right now that you don’t want her to be here?”
“You should’ve asked me in the first place before you just brought her here.”
“Do you want me to tell her to leave?”
Samantha huffed and puffed and just turned away. I did not want to leave. I had to break the tension.
Stepping into the kitchen, I said, “Excuse me. Dad, do you mind taking me to the library? They are doing some tutoring up there, and I signed up to help. I was gonna blow it off, but I think it’s best to get out of here.”
My dad looked at Samantha, clearly upset because he knew I heard everything. He looked at her like, See? Look what you are doing to my daughter. She looked back at me like it was all my fault. He was my dad and even if she became his wife, as long as he wanted me in his life, I was going to be there. I was not leaving because she was making things uncomfortable. Samantha rolled her eyes at me and walked away.
“I got a couple of errands to run anyway. I’ll just drop you off at the library. The one at the school?” he asked.
“Yes, sir.”
“And I’ll be back to pick you up. You okay with all of that?”
Worried he was flustered, I said, “As long as you’re good, I’m good.”
He put his arms around me. “Don’t you worry about all this.”
When we got to the library, he told me he was going to be back in an hour. I rushed in and just fell apart. I was putting tension on my parents. Was I being selfish by just leaving and not telling my mom? Now I had made my dad’s life tougher by being some place that his future wife did not want me to be. Even all that hard work with cheerleading seemed for naught, as the parents of our competition laughed at us when our stunts failed. By the end of our routine, things were so bad the crowd was actually cheering for us to make it through the dance. It was an amazing crowd transformation that was appreciated, but it also humiliated us all. Some girls threatened to quit. Now, standing here alone in the library, it all became too much. I walked to a back corner, slid to the floor and cried.
“Ella? Are you okay?” Leo whispered, caressing my face. “I saw you rush in here, and I don’t want you to be sad. You wanna talk about it?”
In a pitiful tone, I said, “What’s there to talk about? I hate my twin sister. My mom hates me. I should hate her because she spent all my dad’s child support and made me think he never paid it. We might get kicked out of our apartment. The cheerleaders suck. I want to live with my dad, but his fiancée hates the idea. Nothing’s going right in my life.”
Leo leaned down beside me and put his lips to mine. It was as if our tongues were doing a dance. Though it was new to me, nothing was forced. I took my hands and pulled him closer. We were practically on the floor already and when I leaned all the way down, he was on top of me.
He said, “I’ve been thinking about you. I want you. Is that okay? Can I make you feel good?”
He parted my legs. He ran his hand from the inside of my foot all the way to my kneecap. I had to move his hand before it rose any higher. Even though I had on jeans, I was getting too excited. Quickly, I sat up, got to my feet, and backed away.
“I’m sorry,” he said, realizing he took things way too far.
“I have never been with a boy, that’s all.” I looked away.
He took his hand, placed it under my chin, and pulled it toward his face. “Don’t turn away.”
I said, “Leo, I care about you, but I’ve been too reserved to admit it. I just don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t feel the same way. I’m not trying to put pressure on you to say what you think I want to hear. I’ve got too much going on in my life right now to give it up to somebody who doesn’t care.”
He reached down and grabbed me. My legs automatically wrapped around his waist. He leaned me against the stacks, and we were looking eye to eye.
He boldly said, “I already told you, you have been in my thoughts. I think you know me well enough now to know that I don’t have time to bullcrap anybody. If I said I like you, I really mean it. I want you to be my girl.”
At that point I kissed him. His hands were roaming all over my back and even lower. It felt better than I could find words for.
Dr. Sapp caught us and said, “Ella Blount and Leo Steele, I knew y’all had something going on. And you just got your tails out of ISS.”
Leo dropped me so hard that I almost fell down. As we stood and looked at Dr. Sapp, I felt that our guilt was obvious. We were sweating. I felt that my undergarment was not dry. And it wasn’t because I’d peed my pants. Leo’s jeans looked extra snug. I realized that Leo made me feel something new, and those feelings were so overwhelming.
I was so happy that Dr. Sapp only gave us a lecture. The last thing Leo and I needed was any more trouble. When I went outside to get picked up, I frowned when I saw Samantha pulling up.
Leo snuck behind me and said, “Dang, I didn’t know your mama rolled like that.”
“That’s not my mom. That’s my wicked, almost stepmother. They roll. We crawl.”
He laughed and said good-bye. Samantha waved at me like all was right with the world. I desperately wanted to get in the back and play with Evan, but she had his car seat on one side and the empty car seat for the baby on the other. Even though the baby was not born, Samantha was prepared. I did like that about her, and I was trying hard not to hate on the fact that my dad’s little children were going to have everything when my sister and I have struggled for years. I had barely spoken to Samantha before she was dogging me. Now that I knew where I stood with her, there was no need for us to be fake. So I stared out the window.
“Okay, I owe you an apology,” she said, shocking me.
I turned to look at her, but I was not going to say, “Yeah you do,” or “Okay, speak.” No, if she wanted to say something else that was on her mind, then that was on her. I was not going to make her job any easier. She was dead wrong.
“You gotta understand this is just a hectic time in my life right now. I know you overheard me and your dad talking, but I’m getting ready to have this baby, and I’m planning a wedding too. I’m running after a toddler, and I still work. I’d just like to start over with you on a clean slate. Please chalk it up to my crazy hormones and not the fact that I want to have drama with my husband’s daughter.”
My dad was not her husband yet. I knew the only reason why she was apologizing was because she pissed off my dad. Now she wanted me to be nice.
“Whatever,” I said, sounding more like Eva.
How much did one person have to put up with? Actions spoke louder than words. I hope she did not think that I was going to take her little apology at face value.
“So to prove that I really care,” she said, “I’d like for you to be in my wedding. I know your dad asked you guys, and your sister said no. You’re staying with us, though. Evan adores you. I know it would make your father happy to at least have one of his girls there. So I thought we could go to the mall, look at a couple of dresses … You can choose as long as it’s not too provocative. I don’t want your dad having a fit. Plus I want to pick up a couple of baby items. We can get something to eat and just bond if that’s okay.”
Earlier, my dad had given me a couple of dollars. To be able to go into my favorite stores and grab a cute outfit for school so I’d look nice for Leo was on the top of my mind. Certainly, I did want to try to see if this thing with Samantha could work out, if only for my father’s sake. So I agreed to go.
When we got to the mall, the first person we saw was Eva. She was flirting with two guys. She basically thought it was cool to have their hands all over her. It was a public place, and she was just inappropriate.
“Is that your twin? Is that Eva? Oh my. I am so glad that girl is not the one at my house; she is way too mature. Can’t wait to tell your dad about her,” Samantha said.
Though I was so mad at Eva, I did not want Samantha to talk about her like that. Samantha was saying the same things I was thinking; however, it was not her place to say them. My sister was so into her world she did not even notice us. I did not respond to Samantha talking about Eva, and she finally got the point that I was not cool with her innuendos.
Going to the dress shop was a whole separate dilemma. Every dress Samantha liked, I thought was hideous. Every dress that I wanted to wear, she thought was too skimpy. It wasn’t that she didn’t want me to look cute, we just had different tastes. Finally, we found a dress we both liked.
“Toys, Mommy, toys,” Evan begged.
“Ella, I need to go to the restroom. This baby is pressing down on my bladder. Could you please take Evan over to the toy store across the way? I’ll be right over there. Then we can eat and go.”
“Sure, no problem,” I said, knowing that the only thing I wanted to do was buy me an outfit and then dip into the Body Shop.
Before I could browse, my sister came out of the dressing room. “Look at you,” my sister sassed. “Did Dad give you some money to buy your affection, and now you’re here to spend it up?”
“At least I’m not selling my body for money,” I said to her, truly believing that was not true, but wanting her to understand where I was coming from.
“You want me to give little man here a show?” she teased.
“Ugh, you make me sick,” I said, turning Evan around. “Why you gotta take money from those gangbangers? You know they’re gonna want you to put out for real, Eva.”
“Ella, you moved out. You’re breaking Mama’s heart, and you gonna tell me what’s right about what’s wrong? She thinks she not good enough. You gonna try to go and live uptown? You tryna eat off the china? It’s already a slap in her face that Dad has a whole other family, and now you are a part of it.”
“Please, whatever I do is not as devastating to her as what you’re doing. You don’t understand. I’m one less mouth for her to feed right now.”
Eva said, “Justify it any way you want.”
“You know what? I don’t even know why I’m here talking to you.”
“Exactly, let me shop for you. Here’s a perfect little dress that covers up everything.”
“You know what? Get out of my face, Eva,” I said, pushing her and turning around.
“Evan, come on. Let’s go.” I looked around the couple of racks, and I did not see my brother there. “Evan? Evan!” I asked the salesperson, “Have you seen a little boy? About three years old with a jeans jumper on and some cute red Converse?”
“Uh-uh,” the lazy salesperson replied.
At that point I felt like I was going to pass out. I had no idea where Evan went. I looked all around the store, and he was nowhere.
I turned to my sister and said, “You gotta help me.”
I knew she wanted to get smart, but something inside of her would not let her. She said, “All right, come on. We’re gonna find him.”
When we walked out into the mall, I said, “He wanted the toy store. It’s right down there. Maybe he’s in there.”
“You gotta calm down,” Eva said in a reassuring voice.
“How can I calm down? I had the baby and now he’s gone. Oh my gosh!”
“Let’s just go to the toy store.”
I got there before Eva because I ran. I bumped straight into Samantha. “Oh great, I was looking for you guys. I’m starving. Did Evan find something he just couldn’t live without … wait … where’s Evan? Ella, where is Evan?
I stuttered and said, “Um, Evan, uh …”
“He’s in the back of the store,” my sister said, trying to have my back.
Samantha asked, “Where’s my son, Ella?”
I said, “Well, see what happened was—”
Samantha snapped, “Oh my goodness! You don’t know where he is? Evan! I can’t believe this. I leave you in charge of him for five seconds, and now he’s gone.”
“Quit over-exaggerating all of this, lady,” Eva said. “He’s here. My sister is sick over this. We just started looking for him. He couldn’t have gotten that far away.”
Samantha gave my sister a mean glare. She rushed to the information booth and got mall security involved. Next thing you know, police officers were there. My sister and I were still desperately trying to find Evan.
“I can’t believe you’re helping me,” I said to her. “Thank you.”
A little later, everything inside of me started to fear the worst. When my dad found out I was the reason that his son was missing, I didn’t know what I was going to do. We were waiting in the mall’s security office when a policeman approached Samantha and said, “We found this shoe. Is it your son’s? It was by the exit.”
Samantha took one look at it and panicked. When I saw the red Converse, I knew it was Evan’s.
She screamed, “Oh no!”