I spent the morning after breakfast staying out of everyone’s way. I had no idea how long the house would be overrun by the Consortium, but ever since I’d made my announcement, Alexei seemed determined to keep everyone as close as possible. Something about keeping friends close, enemies closer—the usual clichés. I just hoped he cleaned up the enemy business as quickly as possible. There were too many people in my personal space, watching and judging my every move.
Luckily, I had Celeste’s party to get ready for and a mess of potato salad to make. Normally I might not be so enthusiastic about the task, but hunting down the ingredients meant I could spend hours at the market instead of home, my chain-breakers chaperoning my every move, of course. While I was out, I also visited clients I considered friends who were concerned after what they’d witnessed on Mannette’s live-feed—Mrs. Larken and her dog Puddles among them. I assured everyone that closing my shop was only temporary and I’d be happy to make house calls.
By the time I got home, it was late afternoon. I didn’t see Alexei though that didn’t surprise me. He also wasn’t at dinner, where I endured more Consortium scrutiny. I did get a shim saying not to expect him until sometime the next sol, but little else. So I went to bed alone, got up alone, lay low again, then took over the kitchen to make my potato salad.
I ended up wasting most of the sol; I wasn’t familiar with the kitchen and it took forever to find what I needed. Everything was state-of-the-art with AI this and programmable that, beeping and chiming at me, questioning why I wanted to use the manual overrides and not the CN-net interface. I’d never used equipment this elaborate and found the experience so frustrating, I wanted to throw everything in the trash and tell Celeste she could make her own damn salad.
I supposed I could have asked the house staff to take care of it for me, but that would mean admitting the machines had beaten me. Plus, you didn’t hand out secret family recipes to strangers. Absolutely not! So, I peeled mountains of potatoes by hand, chopped onions, ground mustard seeds, and set about making enough salad to feed an army. At one point, I shimmed Celeste demanding to know why she wasn’t having her party catered. Her answer? It wasn’t part of the deal. Trust my cousin to work out some kind of scam on the side to get her event done on the cheap.
I’d been sweating in the kitchen for what seemed like years when I felt hands slide around my waist and a kiss pressed to my throat. I stiffened in surprise, not sure how to fight off an attacker with only a fork and a pot lid in my hands.
“You could try for a fork in the eye, but I’m certain I could stop you,” Alexei said, pulling me back against him, going in for another kiss.
I relaxed. “I was thinking of jabbing you in the hand and a knee to the groin,” I countered.
“That might be just as effective if you could make contact.” His arms tightened almost uncomfortably around me, and he buried his face in the curve of my neck and shoulder. “You may want to try both after we talk.”
I tried to pull away, nervous. I wanted to see his face, but he wouldn’t let me go. “What’s going on?”
“You’re not wearing my ring,” he said instead.
The way he said it sent guilt cascading over me, crushing me like a waterfall. It was like he’d implied I’d purposely decided not to wear it. Or was it me being hypersensitive because of this thing with Brody I didn’t know how, or even want, to stop?
“I had it on earlier, but the potato skins kept getting stuck in it. Then I somehow caught one of the claws with the peeler and this happened.” I held up my left hand where I’d scraped my knuckles raw—a cheap shot from karma reminding me of my betrayal, in case I’d forgotten. The bleeding had stopped, but I hadn’t had time to slap any skin renewal patches on yet. “I’m not used to wearing something that big.”
“I’m sorry,” he said, lifting my hand and kissing it. “I didn’t consider practicality when I had it made.”
Gods, he’d had it made? I felt even worse. “I’ll just be more careful in the future.” I tried turning again, and still he wouldn’t let me, almost as if he didn’t want to face me. “Alexei, you’re acting strange. There’s barely been a word from you in two sols. Now you won’t let me look at you and say we have to talk. Talk about what?”
He sighed into my neck. “Because I don’t want to see your face when I tell you I can’t go tomorrow. I promised I would and I know it means a great deal to you, but I can’t. I’m sorry.”
I felt a horrible, awful dread slash through me, so sharp I dropped what I was holding. The fork and the lid clattered on the countertop. Along with the fear came something I hadn’t expected—relief. It was almost like I was…glad he couldn’t go. What the hell? How could I feel both at once? Or was I afraid because I was relieved?
“Why not?” I asked, my voice a whisper.
“The readings you did—I need to stay on top of this situation with Konstantin. I don’t think it’s wise to be away even for a few hours. Not until I have the full measure of the situation.”
“Has something happened?”
“Not yet, but Konstantin is making noises and some in the Consortium support him. Others have taken my side because they’re tired of his influence and like the new direction we’re exploring but I need to solidify my position.”
“I get that. I understand how important this is. Whatever Konstantin’s doing, you need to figure it out so what I saw in the cards doesn’t happen. But can I just say I really need you with me tomorrow? I feel panicky and scared, and I’m worried I might do something I’ll regret. Please, Alexei. I need you.”
He made a noise like a wounded animal. “I know you do. I know, but I can’t. Konstantin’s being here has fucked with everything. I wasn’t even aware he was en route to Mars until a few sols ago, and that’s not acceptable. He can’t continue to hide things from me, not if I truly lead the Consortium. And now that I’m investigating for myself, I see discrepancies in all the records. He’s funneling the Consortium’s assets elsewhere. I should have known he would attempt something, but I missed it. Probably because I never believed he would risk fracturing the Consortium like this, so I overlooked what should have been obvious. Now I see he’s locked away the details in his memory blocks, in places I’m unable to access.”
“Like the homunculus project?”
“That and I’ve no idea what else. I should be able to access anything from anyone in the Consortium at any time, but I can’t. And the fact that he’s locked me out and taken pains to hide from me is all the proof I need.”
“Can you snipe his memory blocks?”
“With time, yes. It may take up to a week at most, but I fully intend to find everything he’s hidden. He’s carried the homunculus program on in secret. I’ve seen his latest model and Karol thinks it can do what the last one couldn’t: host a human mind without the need to return to a physical body. I’m not even certain Konstantin needs me to pilot it, but I don’t think he realizes that. Regardless, it won’t be long before even I become irrelevant to his plan.”
“How? I thought you were the only one who could merge with the homunculus.”
He sighed. “In the beginning, yes. However, the intent was for everyone to have that ability. In the code I wrote for the Consortium’s neural interface, I created a subroutine to launch a direct link between the human mind and AI mind in the homunculus. It copied the human brainwave data into a series of codes the AI could integrate into its own programming. After Brazil, I deleted the subroutine, or so I thought. Konstantin apparently kept a copy. Once it’s tested, anyone could pilot a homunculus. In theory, the human body would become disposable.”
The idea of people—of everyone—downloading themselves into machines and abandoning everything that made them human so repulsed me that for a moment, I couldn’t speak. It wasn’t that I was against the idea of living longer, or even of living indefinitely. What gave me nightmares was thinking about what we had to give up to achieve that dream. What would we lose in our quest to be immortal? “Can you stop him?”
“I think so. For now, he believes my skill set and t-mods make me the only one able to operate it. He wants me to run it through basic field testing but I’ve told him I want to see the specs first. If I stall him long enough, I’ll have the time I need to snipe his memory blocks.”
I knew what he was saying made sense, but I could feel a tiny seed of doubt creeping into my heart—doubt Brody had sown. “I thought you said I would always be first with you.”
He swore softly but viciously in my ear. “You know it will always be you, but this…I have to do this or there is no future. If I can’t stay ahead of Konstantin, there won’t be any us. I may be leader of the Tsarist Consortium, but it’s in name only. I need to understand what he’s doing and this is the only way.”
I hung in his grip, stupidly watching my potatoes boil. He was right, of course. He needed to deal with Belikov. But he was also wrong and I couldn’t make him see that because I wasn’t sure I wanted to. I didn’t know why, but I didn’t want him there with me, surrounded by my family. I thought I did, but now the case was otherwise, and that knowledge scared me.
“You’re right. Dealing with Belikov takes priority,” I said, letting my head fall back against his shoulder. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll manage. What does a picnic matter when everything else is hanging in the balance?”
He spun me around and pushed me back against the cupboards, kissing me with such heated intensity, I didn’t even notice the AI monitoring the water temperature had allowed the potatoes to boil over until he broke away. He rested his forehead against mine, both of us panting, wanting, needing to touch each other.
“If I didn’t think someone might walk in here any second, I’d already have you spread out on the counter, coming for me,” he whispered, before backing away and not so discreetly adjusting himself.
I shivered at the idea and had a moment where I couldn’t remember if we’d ever had sex in the kitchen or not and maybe we’d better just to make sure, before common sense took over. “What are you going to do when we can’t solve every problem between us with sex?”
He looked at me like I’d lost my mind before he grinned. “I look forward to finding that out with you.” Then he sighed, looking off into the distance, obviously getting a ping from the CN-net. “Konstantin already wants to know when I’m coming back to the test lab.”
“You’re leaving right now?”
He touched my cheek. “I have to. I’m sorry. I might not see you for a few sols. I’m sorry…Fuck. I’m so sick of not being here and telling you how sorry I am. This…It will get better. I promise.”
He looked so miserable, I couldn’t be angry at him. I’d never seen him torn like this, so at a loss and grasping for control. “It’s fine. We’ll get through this. Just do what you need to do and I’ll be here waiting for you. I love you.”
“The second this is over, we’re getting married.”
I smiled, humoring him. “Okay, we’ll get married.”
Then he kissed me again—hard enough to knock the breath out of me and leave me aching for him—turned on his heel, and left.
And to my horror, I could not have been more relieved to see him go.
So it was just me, my cards, and a heaping bowl of potato salad that went to Celeste’s event. While I knew most of my scattered family on Mars, I wasn’t as close to them as I was to those on Earth. That was something I hoped to change.
The flight-limo dropped me and a pair of chain-breakers in front of the venue, Spirit Park, though it wasn’t really a park. It was an enclosed nature and garden sanctuary that hosted private themed parties. It was for the sort of person who wanted a party outdoors, but didn’t want bad weather ruining their event. It was also over-the-top and the last word in ostentatious, making me wonder what sort of con Celeste and her husband were running on the park owners. There was no way they could have afforded this otherwise. Lotus probably knew the score. She knew everything. Or if she didn’t know, she was nosy enough to ask. I was glad I’d dressed up instead of down, wearing a coral-colored sleeveless dress that floated like a dream around my legs and matching coral flats.
According to the invitation, the event was in the Gardenia Room—one of the event spaces in Spirit Park. As I entered the hexagon-shaped building, the citizenship chip in my c-tex was scanned by an automated chip reader so the event numbers could be reported to One Gov. Then I crossed the threshold and paused, momentarily baffled. I knew I’d gone through a set of doors, yet it still felt and looked like I was outside. The breeze ruffled my hair and the sun warmed my skin. Gravel crunched underfoot when I walked. The grass and flowers all felt, looked, and even smelled real. The tactile holograms were powerful enough to fool even a spook like me—without t-mods an AI could lock on to and “trick.”
Following the marked path and posted signs, I made my way to the Gardenia Room. The whole time, I was so positive I was outside, I gave up trying to figure out how it worked and accepted it for what it was. One of my chain-breakers—gods only knew if they’d registered with the One Gov chip reader or not—peeled off for parts unknown while the other stayed at my side. I turned as the path directed, saw a shimmer of light beside me, and I was in another room. It still felt like outdoors, except instead of following a gravel path through the woods, I was in a glade full of leafy green shrubs teeming with white petal flowers. The air smelled like heaven, filled with the scent of gardenias. In the center of the glade were several circular tables with enormous centerpieces and pristine table linens. Most were occupied; looked like I was among the last to arrive.
“Felicia! You made it!” Celeste called out, swooping down on me. She wore a silver gown that nearly brushed the grass and her hair was pulled into an elaborate updo with silver feathers woven into the strands. Looked like I’d been spot-on with my decision to dress up. “She’s here, everyone!”
A chorus of “hellos” and “welcomes” followed from the various tables. Then I found my “made with love” potato salad yanked out of my hands before I was enveloped in a hug that threatened to crush me.
Celeste’s hazel eyes swept over me. “You survived what happened on Mannette Bleu’s disaster theater? It’s all anyone could talk about.”
“I’m fine, and I brought the cards so there’s nothing to worry about.” Thank you, Brody, I added silently.
“No one cares about the cards. You’re more important,” Celeste assured me.
Spoken like someone who didn’t have the luck gene. “Thanks, but we know that’s not true. I could name at least twenty people who would disagree.”
“Then they’re idiots,” she said in a tone indicating it was her final word on the subject. She handed my salad to a passing teenage boy, some cousin or other, who grunted and headed off in the direction of the food. I hoped I got my bowl back later.
“Where’s the boyfriend?” Celeste asked. Seemed like my other chain-breaker had peeled off as well or she probably would have thought we were a couple.
“He wanted to be here, but a work situation popped up. I did say he was busy.”
I’m not sure Celeste was actually listening to me since she was looking at my hand, eyes widening.
“Holy fuck,” she said, a phrase I couldn’t remember ever having heard come out of her mouth. She picked up my left hand to examine my ring. “Is that real? They can probably see it from Earth.”
I laughed self-consciously. “Yes, it’s real. I guess I’m getting married. It just sort of happened so I haven’t really told anyone yet.”
“Married to someone none of us have met,” Celeste said, frowning as she played mother hen. “You know we need to meet him first. See how he fits in.”
Oh boy, that would certainly be interesting. “Well, Lotus knows him.”
Celeste made a sound that could only be described as disapproving before pulling me toward the group.
“Let me introduce you to everyone first. I know there are some you still haven’t met. Then we’ll talk about this no-show boyfriend.” She brightened suddenly. “Oh, if you’re getting married, you know what this means?”
I looked at her worriedly as she pulled me farther into the crowd, some of whom were rising out of chairs to make their way toward me. “No, what?”
“It means more babies!”
“More babies? But I’m not having a baby.”
I stopped short, the rest of what I wanted to say abruptly forgotten.
As my family approached, that was when I saw it. Maybe I wasn’t having a baby, but it looked like every single female in my family who was of childbearing years was. All of them were pregnant. Every damn last one. I stopped counting at ten, but I’m pretty sure there were more. Maybe it was as high as fifteen.
Now I could see why Lotus was so keen on having a baby, and why my own thoughts were straying in that direction. The luck gene looked for ways to change events in its favor and now that our blacklisted status was revoked, it was prodding us to begin reproducing like damned rabbits.
I had caused this to happen, I realized. If I hadn’t suffered and lost and fought and been betrayed and used over and over again, none of these children would exist. I had paid the price for all this, and it had been expensive, nearly costing me everything. Yet instead of feeling vindicated, it made me angry. It reminded me how miserable and helpless I’d felt, and let me know I was a pawn once again. I would never have my own life because I would always be luck’s fucking pawn, always pulled in the direction it wanted and doing its bidding.
“Celeste, what the hell?” I blurted out, looking at the assortment of pregnant bellies ambling toward me. “Why didn’t someone warn me?”
“What’s to warn? We’re having babies, not breeding locusts.”
“But…” I opened my mouth, closed it, not sure what to say. I was never going to be free, I realized bleakly. Never. “You said a few of them were pregnant, but not this many. Not all at once.”
“I know. Isn’t it amazing? These women eat like calorie consumption points are a suggestion, not a law. You really should have brought more potato salad.”
All I could do was nod because it was better than freaking out and running away.
“Yeah,” I said helplessly. “More salad.”