Mina Murray’s Journal
Last night, Lucy walked in her sleep.
I woke in the night and reached out to find the space beside me empty, then I heard a scratching from the hallway. I slid out of bed and down the hallway to see Lucy, naked in the moonlight spilling through my living room window. My first thought (of course) was of how beautiful she was, her long limbs, smooth skin, and the halo of her hair…
But then I said her name and she was unresponsive, like someone in a trance. She stood staring out the window, then raised a hand to it as if the glass weren’t there and she was reaching for someone just outside, in the dark. It gave me such a chill. When I said her name again, louder this time, she turned to me with the blank, empty eyes of a stranger.
“Lucy, come to bed,” I said.
She stared right through me.
“Luce?”
Cleo and Sparrow had followed her into the living room and they twined around her ankles. I took her hand and led her slowly through the dark corridor to the bedroom. When I guided her back into bed, she seemed to come awake for a moment and looked at me, as if confused why I was out of bed. I slid in beside her and she tucked her chin against my neck and her arm around me, falling back to sleep immediately.
Why last night, when she hasn’t sleepwalked since we were sixteen—that I know of?
Before bed, we were talking about Harker. More and more, Lucy made anxious half-jokes that turned serious, about the names on Harker’s desk suggesting that Harker might have had something to do with hurting people. I confess I don’t quite understand this turn of her mind. Harker—sweet, generous, timid Harker—is the last person I’d suspect of harm. Lucy would make a far more effective serial killer than him. Hell, I’d let her serial kill me any day.
But it is strange, her leap to imagining him as the villain rather than the victim; the villain rather than…gone of his own choice. I tried to ask her about it but her eyes flashed with fear and I knew she wasn’t hearing me. Lucy’s mind is as impulsive as her spirit. She won’t cling to this belief if I can disprove it. But I do wonder if there is something about Harker she hasn’t told me that’s drawing her mind in this direction. Some source of threat or guilt she’s keeping to herself.
Arthur thinks the stress of Harker working on his dissertation full time and trying to do whatever he was doing with Thrall stressed him out and he just peaced out for a bit. Of course, Arthur’s never actually met Harker. And I’m not sure. His research didn’t seem to be nearly so much a source of stress as a source of satisfaction for Harker—at least that was always how I saw it. But do we ever truly know how things are affecting others?
Do we ever truly know anyone?
I hope someone listening to Shadowcast might be able to shine some light on this list of names. If we can figure out more about who they are, hopefully we can find Harker…
Note: look up sleepwalking as a stress response, and other symptoms.