Joe is the average consumer. He feels certain ways about himself. There are some things that Joe thinks are true about him: “I’m creative, a good worker, a funny guy, a damned good cook.”
There are some other things he wishes he could say were true about him but are not: “I’m comfortable around attractive women. I’m self-assured in almost every situation. I can walk past a gang of thugs and feel secure in my ability to defend myself if I have to. I’m a savvy consumer.”
In fact, this is the typical state of the consumer mind. Your prospects believe some things about themselves, and there are contrasting things they’d like to believe about themselves.
The foundation for ego morphing and the vanity appeal was described by Pratkanis and Aronson (Age of Propaganda, 1991), who said, “By purchasing the ‘right stuff,’ we [consumers] enhance our own egos and rationalize away our inadequacies.”
This is the power of ego morphing. It suggests that your product or service is purchased by people who need the image that your product reflects, such as sex appeal, confidence, power, and status, and that they’ll buy it to fill a hole in their personalities and thus satisfy a deep craving for things they feel they’re lacking.
Ego morphing also allows your prospects to reinforce to themselves and demonstrate to people around them that they already possess certain traits. Your product in this case allows consumers to show off current character traits that crave expression and by doing so boosts their egos and provides enormous personal gratification.
The feeling of inferiority rules the mental life and can
be clearly recognized in the sense of incompleteness and
unfulfillment, and in the uninterrupted struggle both
of individuals and humanity.
Alfred Adler
The goal is to cause your prospects to be so closely associated with your product’s image that it actually becomes part of their identity; thus, you’re morphing their egos to fit your product. You want your prospects to believe that by buying your products, they’ll somehow be associated with the images those products convey. In effect, they buy your product for the benefits you strongly proclaim but also for the way the image will—they believe, albeit perhaps unconsciously—enhance their egos.
Let’s say I developed a special brand of men’s footwear—sneakers—that is specially targeted to hard-core mixed martial arts (MMA) fighters to wear when they’re not fighting. (Actually, I don’t care who buys and wears them, whether it’s Anderson Silva or little Tommy Tucker who just turned four.) I simply want to establish an aura about the product. I want to brand the product that way. Why? Because I know that countless young men will be attracted to the product, even those whose last fight was in the schoolyard in second grade over a stolen Blow Pop.
Question: why would guys who aren’t fighters be attracted to footwear that’s targeted at fighters? Isn’t it like trying to sell them nail polish, bubble bath, or pretty fragranced soap?
“No, Drew, it’s not. Because guys who buy the sneakers can actually use them. It’s not at all like nail polish, bubble bath, or soap.”
If that’s what you’re thinking, your answer is only partly correct because you’re telling me that only their real or perceived need for or end use of the product justifies its purchase. (Anyone can wear shoes, right?) But I’m not talking about utility or need; I’m talking about want. Need is left-brain logical. I’m talking about what’s often referred to as right-brain emotional, the number one driver of all purchases. Although this lateralization of brain function isn’t supported by neurological studies, it’s a useful way to describe the split between logic and emotion.
Fact is, these non-fighter guys will buy the shoes because of the feeling the shoes will give them. By wearing and showing off the shoes, they’ll feel like tough MMA fighters. They’ll feel like they’re now part of that group. They’ll hope that others will see their shoes and form an interpretation that says, “That guy’s wearing MMA shoes. Hmmm, maybe he’s a fighter.” If you’re the guy wearing those shoes, you’ll hope that other people think that, too. Whether you admit it or not, you’d get far less satisfaction if nobody saw you wearing the shoes. It’s other people’s experience of you wearing them and your resulting interpretation of their experience (they’re thinking you’re a tough MMA guy) that are so seductive to your ego. What it adds to your ego is what you personally feel is lacking or what you for whatever reason need to express more of.
If I can lace up a pair of sneakers and instantly feel braver, tougher, and more self-confident and have others, thanks to the branding plastered all over the shoes, assume that I must be capable of handling myself physically should the need arise, I’ve gotten a pretty good deal for $85.
And that, my friend, is ego morphing. The product makes me feel a certain beneficial way about myself that without the product I feel deficient in, or I’m driven by some psychological need to express that quality more openly and vigorously to enhance my association with that quality. Make sense?
All charming people have something to conceal, usually their
total dependence on the appreciation of others.
Cyril Connolly
If your product allows you to capitalize on the power of ego morphing, you have an opportunity to affect prospects and customers on a level that other products cannot approach. The ability to make the consumer feel that he or she is one with your product and identify with it on a self-image level is profound. Assuming you’re able to do this—and we’ll discuss how you can shortly—how loyal do you think your buyer will be to your product? Incredibly so, because now your product doesn’t just satisfy utility but can psychologically satisfy your buyer enough to make him or her feel more humanly whole. It is a psychic Band-Aid, if you will. Profound, indeed.
Not all products and services can readily use ego morphing without stretching it. Some items simply don’t readily offer psychic benefits, such as a floor mop or a toilet bowl cleaner. What would it take for someone to want to identify with either of those products? Scary.
Instead, imagine you run a bakery. Choosing your doughnuts instead of your competitors’ doesn’t do much to boost my ego, right? Hmmm ….but actually, with a little creative thought, it could! Let’s look at an extreme example so that you can get a better idea how with some tweaking and creative thinking you may be able to use ego morphing for your own product or service.
Consider the Olympic Bakery, a tiny pastry shop that specializes in healthful baked goods: low-sugar, low-fat, low-guilt, high-flavor. What’s not to like, right? The way they position their products is by having up-and-coming (translation: cheaper to hire) Olympic athletes lovingly hold their mouthwatering (baked) doughnuts, cakes, and pies on giant billboards throughout the city: “The Olympic Bakery: For athletes with a sweet tooth.” Big, high-resolution images of blueberry muffins bursting with fresh berries. Tall slices of banana cream pie with pillows of fluffy cream on top. Strawberry shortcakes, chocolate cookies, fabulous muffins—the tongue reels.
And because you’re so darned smart, your bags and boxes, of course, feature the same sporty graphics along with your name and logo. How clever and simple is that? When I carry your bags and boxes, I can not only justify spending more money on baked treats (because your products are healthier versions of traditional baked goodies) but identify with your cool athlete positioning and secretly hope that others see those bags and boxes and infer that maybe I’m an athlete of some kind or, if my body type is a giveaway to the contrary, that I’m at least health conscious like an athlete.
But what if your bakery sold only the traditional (yummier) versions of those baked treats, not the less guilt-producing versions?
How about creating a separate line of the most expensive cookies, cakes, and brownies in the entire city and then promoting them as such, with appropriate justification for the pricing, of course: baked hourly, only the world’s most expensive chocolate made exclusively from cocoa plantations in Venezuela, Trinidad, Côte d’Ivoire, and Ecuador, and Tahitian Gold vanilla beans. (You get the idea). Remember the special bags and boxes? Gold, of course, with fancy wine-label-like graphics.
A $10 cookie? A $20 brownie? Don’t laugh. It’s far less than the $750 brownie on the menu at Brulee: The Dessert Experience at the Tropicana Casino & Resort in Atlantic City, New Jersey. Sure, they give you a crystal atomizer filled with port wine that you’re supposed to spray onto your tongue between brownie forkfuls (Yes, really!), but you get the idea. What kind of ego morphing do you think goes on in that place? Certainly not the same kind that occurs in someone who wants to identify with a mop.
Of course, the idea isn’t to create something that people can’t afford. In fact, using this type of approach, you want to set your pricing just within the limit of affordability for your market. The goal is to create a persona, an aura, a business or product positioning that people want to identify with, whether it’s (even loosely) associating with athletes or having others think they have the financial wherewithal to buy $20 pastries: “She must be rich; she’s eating one of those crazy-expensive brownies. If she can spend 20 freakin’ bucks on dessert, what the heck kind of car does she drive?”
When I’m carrying that gold bag with those fancy graphics, to me it’s tantamount to wearing a Franck Muller Aeternitas Mega 4 watch or a pair of $13,985 bespoke John Lobb Tudor IV crocodile shoes. It’s a heck of a lot less expensive, of course, but the same psychology is in play. The watch and the shoes aren’t just for me to see and enjoy. No way! I wear them for others to see as well, because I believe that they’ll think certain things about me that I take great pleasure in imagining they’re thinking. It’s an ego-enhancing type of vicarious meta-perspective pleasure that is based on my hopeful expectation of other people’s positive interpretation of my public displays. (Read that again.)
Talk about ego, right? Of course. This book is about consumer and sales psychology. Perhaps some of these examples or even the principles themselves seem petty or silly, but who ever said the human brain operates at a level that’s never silly or petty?
Pretend that every single person you meet has a sign around
his or her neck that says, “Make me feel important.” Not only
will you succeed in sales, you will succeed in life.
Mary Kay Ash
Let’s see how to incorporate the principle of ego morphing into an actual sales presentation. Our goal is to present our product in a way that makes a person want to identify with it. Now, understand that it takes more than a sales pitch for someone to want to identify with a product. The product must have appealing enough inherent qualities for that reaction to occur. Simply talking doesn’t imbue a product with qualities unless all I’m doing is painting a mental picture and fabricating the facts about it. Therefore, let’s assume you’ve already constructed a product or service that as a result of some inherent quality would appeal to a user by display (holding a $38,000 Fendi Selleria handbag) or active use (riding a $27,750 Beru Factor 001 bicycle).
Let’s devise a script so that you can see how to use this principle in your sales pitch. Let’s use a product everybody’s familiar with: carpet.
After exchanging pleasantries and learning what your prospect wants, you show him his two best choices: option A, a nice cut and loop by a well-known manufacturer, and option B, a high-end Saxony by Tuftex, the premier brand of the world’s largest and most highly regarded producer of floor coverings: Shaw Floors.
Your prospect, Scott, says, “This is pretty much what I’m looking for in style and quality.” You reply, “Yep, that’s a good-quality carpet, and you can certainly go with that one. [affirmation of decision to convey a sense of control and lack of sales pressure] But before you finalize your choice, take a look at this one here. It’s made by Tuftex, the upscale Southern California–based carpet division of Shaw, the largest carpet manufacturer in the world. It’s a few bucks more per square yard, but it’s significantly better than that cut and loop. It’s actually the same carpet that was used in the Axelrod mansion, the Reid Landon estate, and the illustrious Chase-Ryder Symphony Hall. It’s sort of the ‘celebrity carpet’ because it tends to be the choice of the rich and famous, so to speak, but not simply because it costs a few dollars more but because it lasts longer, resists stains better, and doesn’t crush as easily as the cheaper brand. [redefinition of the lower-priced product; providing a logical rationale to support the emotionally driven desire to spend more]
“Of course, you don’t want to choose this carpet just because it’s the number one pick for celebrity estates and mansions; you want to look at the real benefits it offers. This pattern isn’t available in any other brand. It’s actually exclusive to this particular carpet. It’s like the designer’s signature, so to speak. In fact, people who like watching HGTV and those million-dollar-home shows see this Tuftex carpet a lot and would probably recognize it if they came to your house. That’s nice, of course, but what’s more important than all that is the durability factor. [Mentioning the ego factor and then downplaying it with left-brain rationalization serves to reinforce it, causing many prospects to want the salesperson to continue the ego feeding aspect of the presentation because emotionally it’s the most appealing and emotion is the primary driver of sales.]
“Now, if you can justify spending a few more dollars a yard for this mansion carpeting [An example of redefinition. It’s not just carpet that’s used in mansions, it’s “mansion carpeting,” transforming its inherent nature from a mere quality product by implying that it’s produced exclusively for upscale residences.], you can feel good knowing that when you’re likely to replace this cheaper product this upscale carpeting will continue looking great. Oh, the cheaper carpet is still good, don’t get me wrong [pullback statement to lessen what could be perceived as too hard a sell for the more expensive choice]; but you’ll get several years more out of this higher-quality Tuftex product. So even though this better carpet costs a bit more, in the long run, really, it’s probably a breakeven or actually a better overall deal. [rationalization using the implication of an indisputable calculated arithmetic comparative]
“So, Scott, while carpet A is a good choice, the Tuftex mansion carpet is a smart economic choice. Just depends how you want to look at it.” [power grant: a statement that relieves tension by reminding Scott that the decision is in his hands and you, the salesperson, aren’t pushing him]
Note how the salesperson doesn’t aggressively drive the ego aspect any longer at this point. There’s no need to, as it’s already in Scott’s head. Scott needs only to be able to justify the additional expenditure in order to pull the trigger. Your job as the salesperson is to set the ego nail and pile on enough left-brain rationalizations for Joe to feel that he’s making an adult decision that’s based on logic, not on his financially irresponsible ego-driven emotions.
“Personally, if I were going to stay in my house for more than a couple of years, I’d go with the mansion carpet. It’s softer and more durable, resists stains longer, doesn’t mat as easily, looks incredibly rich, and has a totally upscale appearance that I personally like. Carpet A, while it’s nice, pretty much just looks like plain old, normal carpet, if you know what I mean. [dissatisfaction generator] Plus, if you don’t mind your guests secretly thinking you spent an arm and a leg on the better Tuftex carpet [bringing in the audience; Lifeforce-8, number 6 (to be superior) and number 8 (social approval)]—which you won’t when you buy during our ongoing sale—then I’d personally go with this upscale carpet, but it’s completely up to you, of course.” [power grant]
In this dialogue, the salesperson stood in the middle of a psychological seesaw, playing both sides of the consumer’s brain effectively. He not only gave the nuts and bolts—the features and benefits—of both carpets, he appealed to the buyer’s ego by assigning an appealing element to the more costly carpet that the less expensive carpet could not provide.
In other words, the salesperson imbued the inanimate fibrous product with qualities that it does not truly have. He morphed his product into one that, by speaking alone, has the ability to affect the psychic well-being of a consumer who, by his acceptance of the wholly created quality, is compelled to spend more money to experience it.
This is psychological magic, to say the least. But who’s to say that such created mental benefits aren’t as valuable as the product’s physical benefits? If every time Scott opens the door to his house and feasts his eyes on the most gorgeous carpet he’s ever seen, carpet that he knows graces the homes of the rich and famous, perhaps he’ll feel a little bit better about himself, his ability to make good decisions, and his good fortune to be able to afford some of the finer things in life. If when friends and family visit him they comment about the beauty of the flooring, he’ll get to casually drop the names of some of the celebrities, mansions, and estates that his salesman “happened to have mentioned” that have the very same carpet.
If they don’t broach the subject but make more general statements about the beauty of his home, perhaps he’ll say, “Oh, do you happen to watch HGTV? You may have seen this same carpet in some of those mansions they always show; it seems to work well in this room.”
“Come on, Drew. Such a small person to need compliments about the assemblage of fiber on his floors.”
Well, how much bigger a person is it who wants to hear compliments about the model of car he drives, the suit he owns, the shoes she wears, the street he lives on, the purse she carries, the links of metal around his neck, or the high-end refrigerator in her kitchen? Are these suggestive of bigger people? Remember, we’re talking about emotions. Emotions don’t come in a box marked “logical.”
Whatever you think about people who enjoy getting compliments on their selections of consumer goods, the fact is that most people do. People either already associate with particular groups that give them great ego satisfaction or aspire to associate with certain groups in which membership, they believe, would be deeply gratifying.
One of the greatest exercises in frustration is attempting to see the world and its events though a filter of the way you think they should be rather than the way they actually are. Besides—and here’s what’s most important of all—if someone gets ego satisfaction from owning your product, isn’t that a good thing regardless of how petty it might seem? Wouldn’t helping people realize what satisfaction they can get from what you sell assist you, your business, and your family? Of course. Don’t be so concerned about the existence of these emotions or how mature their expression might be. Just know that they exist and that by tapping into them you can satisfy your prospects’ psychological needs and make some money to boot.
Let’s get practical. First, determine what—if any—ego satisfaction your product or service currently provides or could provide with an appeal that speaks directly to vanity, esteem, self-importance, superiority, or social approval, whether it’s achieved by your prospects’ public display of your goods or by the satisfaction they quietly enjoy through an inner sense of self-gratification. Link this appeal to groups that or people who embody traits with which such purchasers are likely to want to identify because of characteristics or qualities they possess. Here’s an example.
“You can look at every other [product or service] out there, but the fact is—and I invite you to check it out on your own—not only does this [product or service] offer the specific features and benefits that you’re looking for at an excellent price, specifically [state features and benefits], but because it’s [the finest, fastest, most durable, most precise, most effective, etc.], this particular [brand or model] is [extremely popular with or the number one choice of] [associative/aspirational group] “today’s top professional skiers, such as Bode Miller and Grete Eliassen,” “today’s most hardcore computer gamers, such as Lee Young-Ho, Lee Jae-dong, and Danil Ishutin,” “the country’s most powerful and successful real estate investors, such as Donald Trump, Steve Wynn, and Tom Barrack, and many of today’s top [MMA fighters/interior decorators/dog breeders/chefs/etc.]. These people have either the financial means or the technical smarts to choose the [product] they know is best, and they’re choosing ours.”
If you have printed materials that support your claim that your product is used by your prospects’ associative or aspirational group, show it. Nothing will ego morph your prospects more powerfully than credible visual confirmation of your verbal statements. Take the time to amass visual printed proof and you’ll reap the rewards with every sales presentation.
Note: The purpose of the dialogues in this book is not to provide you with complete sales presentations. Instead, they focus on only one slice of the pitch: the psychological tactic being discussed. The goal is to give you the flavor of the concepts’ use so that you can translate them into your own words and massage the scripts for maximum effectiveness for your product.