Chapter Twenty-one

The next day’s march was grueling, miles of rocky, uneven terrain under a broiling sun, the horizon hazy with waves of dust and heat. Elissa walked behind one of the supply wagons, her muscles aching with every step, her face damp with perspiration. Beside her, Nina led the mare, her brother and sister perched on the saddle.

Elissa studied little Tibor, whose cheeks were flushed with heat, his thick black hair stuck to his forehead. Vada looked little better, her face damp beneath an old straw bonnet three sizes too big that Nina had borrowed from one of the women.

Elissa took another weary step, unwilling to ride while her friend and the other women walked. As tired as she was, when Adrian’s big black stallion came into view, wending its way in her direction, the sight of his tall figure riding toward her with such purpose made her heart leap with excitement. Adrian rode up in a sweep of dust, looking nearly as hot and weary as she, but a smile softened his features and his eyes danced with what looked suspiciously like mischief.

“Give me your hand,” he commanded, reining the big horse up beside her. Elissa smiled as Adrian reached down and clasped her wrist, swung her effortlessly up behind him. “There is something I would show you.”

Her excitement grew, making her stomach flutter. “Where are we going?”

His mouth curved roguishly. “You will have to wait and see.” Reining away from the endless line of soldiers, he urged the stallion into an easy gallop, cutting a path across the open fields toward the line of trees that marked a dense, shady pine forest on the side of a sloping hill. Elissa clung to his waist, her cheek against his back, enjoying the solid feel of him, the closeness she had begun to feel since he had spoken to her of his past.

He slowed the stallion as they entered the forest, allowing the animal to pick its way deeper into the woods. Pine boughs formed a canopy above their heads. A thick carpet of needles padded the horse’s steps as they rode along. The sound of water gushing over rocks alerted her to the presence of a stream and seconds later, the horse burst upon it.

“Oh, Adrian—I can hardly believe it!”

He grinned, exposing his beautiful dimples. “I thought her ladyship might enjoy a bath.”

Elissa laughed with pure delight. “Sweet Jesu, there is nothing that would please me more.”

He turned the horse and followed along the muddy bank. “There’s a pool off to the left up ahead. I think it will serve our purpose.” In minutes they had reached it, a gently swirling eddy hidden behind a thicket of boulders and sheltered beneath the pines. Pulling the stallion to a halt, he threw a leg over the horse’s neck and slid to the ground, then reached up and lifted her down, setting her firmly on her feet.

“Lieutenant Helm told me about this place. He used to live on a farm near here.”

Elissa surveyed the frothy little waterfall tumbling into the gently circling pool, the thick vines of clematis draping over the edge of the water, the mossy banks sheltered by sweet green grasses.

“It’s lovely, Adrian. Perfect.” Hurrying ahead of him, she raced to the bank and began to strip off her clothes, her fingers fumbling in her excitement as she pulled off her blouse and unfastened the buttons on her simple brown skirt. She tossed them over a nearby shrub, then sat down to pull off her shoes.

“We won’t have much time,” Adrian said, coming up behind her, already shirtless, his boots resting on a flat gray stone. “We don’t want to get too far behind.”

She grinned and reached for the buttons at the front of his breeches. “Then we had better hurry.”

Adrian laughed, the excitement contagious. Tugging his breeches down over his long, powerfully muscled legs, he added them to the pile of clothes strung over the bushes. He was grinning when he scooped her up, both of them naked, carefree for the first time in weeks.

“It’s freezing!” she cried, goose bumps replacing the hot, moist skin of only moments ago. Laughing, she splashed icy mountain water all over his chest. “And it feels delicious!”

“You feel delicious,” he teased, his hands coming up to cradle her breasts. He cupped them gently, the ends already hard from the freezing water, then he kissed her, quick and hard. He was grinning when he pulled away. With a single, quick movement, he knocked her legs out from beneath her and she plunged beneath the surface of the water. She came up sputtering, gasping for breath, and laughing for the sheer joy of it.

“That wasn’t fair! You were kissing me. I thought we were going to make love.”

Adrian grinned. “Count on it, angel, but I rather thought a bath was in order first.”

She made a sound of outrage and leapt in his direction, bringing him down like a landed fish in the water beside her. He came up spitting and grinning, water streaming off his dark hair and running in rivulets through the curly hair on his chest. “Did I call you angel? I meant hellion. A beautiful little hellion, but a hellion just the same.”

Elissa laughed and darted away from him, diving under the water then surging back to the surface. Adrian followed, the two of them playing like otters in the cold water of the pond. She couldn’t remember being so happy. And she thought that Adrian looked happy, too.

They made love there in the pool, Elissa wrapping her legs around his waist, enjoying the firm, flat muscles there as he lifted her astride him. Their mating was fierce, a tangling of tongues and a surging of bodies that later turned slow and languid, matching the pace of the hot afternoon. Afterward they stretched out on a rock to dry, their eyes shaded by a pine bough arching protectively over their heads.

Elissa ran a finger along the muscles across his shoulders, tracing the sinews and valleys. “Adrian…?”

He grunted a fuzzy response, half asleep in the afternoon heat.

“Have you ever been … in love?”

His eyelids drifted open. She thought that he would not answer, then he lazily smiled and propped himself up on an elbow. “I thought I was once … a long time ago. I was a fool back then.”

“What happened?”

“Her name was Miriam … Miriam Springer. I was twenty and she was nineteen, the daughter of a nobleman my father had dealt with in business. She was beautiful. Slender, dark auburn hair, and the palest, smoothest skin. She was the kind of girl I’d always dreamed of, laughing and happy, always reaching out to take my hand. I thought she would make the perfect wife, the perfect mother for my children.”

A pang of envy rippled through her. It hurt to think he had loved a woman so much. “Why didn’t you marry her?”

A soft sigh whispered past his lips. “I wanted to. I asked her and she said yes. A wedding was planned for the fall and I could hardly wait for the time to arrive. I actually believed that from that day forward, everything would change, that my life would finally be the way I’d always imagined.” His voice faded off and she realized he was drifting into the past, seeing that day as if he were there once more.

“I was nervous,” he said. “So terrified I was sick to my stomach. I wanted everything to be perfect for her. I wanted to be perfect for her. I stood at the altar, my heart pounding so hard I could barely hear the organ in the background, my neck cloth so tight I couldn’t breathe. I can still remember my new shoes pinching my feet.” A sigh slid out. “In front of five hundred people, I stared up the aisle, looking like the veriest fool, waiting for my bride to come through those big church doors. But Miriam never appeared.”

Elissa’s stomach tightened. “What happened?” She stared into his face, saw the lines of sadness there, saw that his expression looked distant, turned inward to somewhere in the past.

“She ran away,” he said. “It wasn’t too difficult to discover what had occurred. You see, my brother Richard was also missing. The next day I learned they had eloped to Gretna Green.”

Elissa’s heart squeezed as if a heavy weight sat on her chest. Her throat closed up, aching for him, clogged with unshed tears. “Oh, Adrian…” Dear God, how could the woman have done it? How could she have abandoned him just like his father and mother, just like everyone else he had ever loved? More pain, more suffering. His life had been so full of heartache, so full of loneliness. Curled against him on the rock, Elissa felt a tremor run through his body, and an ache tore through her own.

She blinked to hold back tears, determined to discover the rest of the story. “Miriam … did she love Richard?”

Adrian scoffed. “My brother was heir to my father’s estate, a far better catch than I, merely a second son. As it turned out, Richard didn’t give a whit about her. He married her because I wanted her—it was as simple as that.” Bitterness formed lines across his forehead, turning his features icy and hard. “In the end, my brother lost everything my father left him in the first two years. He died just a few years later. It was God’s little jest when through a distant cousin, the Wolvermont title and fortune came to me. God’s little joke on us all.”

“Adrian, sweet God…” She turned to him, her heart aching, pulled his head down to her breast and stroked her fingers through his hair. “I can’t bear to think of it … the way you must have suffered year after year. I don’t know if I could have survived it.” Tears collected, spilled down her cheeks, and a crushing ache for him rose in her chest. “Life can be so unfair.”

Sweet God, she hurt for him. She hurt for him so much.

Adrian released a pent-up breath and slowly sat up, drawing himself away. He stared off into the distance. “It isn’t important anymore, and in truth it was probably for the best. She was unfaithful to Richard, as she would have been to me. I would have made a terrible husband and—”

“That’s not true! You are kind and you are considerate. You are brave and you are strong. You would have made a wonderful husband.”

“Yes … well, be that as it may, it is hardly important now. I enlisted in the army the following week, and over the years, I’ve made a life for myself. I am content. I am also older and wiser—and I’m not fool enough to believe in love.”

The lump in her throat ached harder. He didn’t believe in love—how could he after all that he’d been through?

“You’re wrong, Adrian.” She leaned over and kissed his cheek, her heart breaking for him. “There is such a thing as love. Some people just never find it.”

She wanted to say more, to tell him that Miriam might not have loved him but she did—madly, passionately, more than life itself. She wanted to say that she was nothing like Miriam Springer, that if he would trust her, love her half as much as she loved him, she could give him the dream he had always wanted.

But she didn’t say the words. The cold look on his face held her back, and she was afraid he wouldn’t believe her. If he did, it might be worse. He might pull away, and she would be certain to lose him. She had to give him time, pray his feelings for her would grow, as lately they had seemed to.

He snuggled her against him, hugged her briefly, saw the tears on her cheeks. “Bloody hell—you’re crying.”

She released a shaky breath, tried to smile and faltered. “I’m sorry. It’s just that what they did to you was so wrong.”

He bent and pressed a soft kiss on her lips. “I told you, it isn’t important. All that is in the past.”

She nodded, tried to be brave. “Are you … are you still in love with her?” She hadn’t meant to ask him, couldn’t believe she had actually spoken the words.

Adrian shook his head. “In truth, I don’t think I ever really loved her. She was simply part of a dream, a fantasy that wasn’t real—could never be real—at least not for me.”

Elissa said nothing. A swell of emotion rose inside her. She swallowed past the lump in her throat and forced herself to smile. “She didn’t deserve you. Miriam was the fool, my love, not you.”

His gaze swung to hers. Something shifted across his features, then it was gone. He came to his feet with brusque purpose and began to pull on his clothes. “It’s time we started back. We should have left before this.”

Elissa glanced toward his tall black stallion, munching grass a few feet away. “Minotaur will catch up to them in no time, and the trip was well worth it.” She smiled, her heart overflowing with love for him. “Thank you, Adrian. I shall never forget this day. I shall cherish the memory always.”

Adrian nodded, but there was something different in the look he gave her, as if he had already begun to pull away. It seemed as though each time he let his guard down, he did his best to distance himself again.

He finished dressing then waited while she dressed and pulled on her shoes. Gathering Minotaur’s reins, he led the great horse through the cool pine forest to the open country where they would pick up the army’s trail.

From beneath her lashes, Elissa watched him, wondering if she should have told him the truth of how she felt. Perhaps she was wrong to keep silent when he needed her love so badly. Still, it was risky, better perhaps to wait.

In the distance ahead, something flashed in the sunlight, drawing her attention in that direction. She squinted against the brightness trying to make it out. The long, glinting barrel of a musket on the top of a boulder came into view, and she blinked, unable to believe her eyes.

A jolt of terror ripped through her—the musket pointed straight at Adrian’s heart.

“Adrian!” There wasn’t time to think. Hurling herself in front of him, her arms outstretched to protect him, she heard the crack of the musket the same instant Adrian spotted the gun, but it was already too late. A blinding pain crashed into her head and Elissa cried out, slumping forward, sliding the length of Adrian’s tall frame, barely hearing his deep voice shouting her name. Adrian shoved her to the ground, shielding her with his body, carrying her, inch by inch, behind a covering of boulders. The blue sky above was the last thing she saw as she slipped into darkness.

Adrian forgot to breathe. Elissa lay motionless in the grass beneath him and his hands were shaking so badly he was afraid to touch her. His heart was thundering, trying to pound its way through his ribs, and his stomach was knotted in fear.

“Elissa … angel.” His throat closed up. He eased himself away from her, saw the blood oozing from the side of her head, beginning to mat her golden curls. He wanted to call back the seconds, change the course of events, but he knew that he could not. “Elissa—love, it’s Adrian, can you hear me?” She didn’t answer.

Adrian searched the distance, trying to locate the man who had fired the shot, dimly aware they were both still in danger. He saw no one, and the barrel of the musket had disappeared.

Stay calm, he told himself. You’ve seen thousands of men injured in battle. Get hold of yourself. You’ve got to make yourself think! But he had never felt like this when he had been in battle, never felt this gut-churning, all-consuming terror for one of his men.

He dragged in a deep breath of air and once more scanned their surroundings for any sort of danger. The distant thunder of hoofbeats told him their assailant was leaving, but he couldn’t be sure. With hands that shook, he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and pressed it against the gash at the side of Elissa’s head to staunch the flow of blood. She continued to breathe, he saw with relief, her breasts rising and falling softly. He checked the pulse at the base of her throat and thankfully found it steady.

“Easy, love. Just take it easy.” He hauled in a shaky breath and fought for control, scarcely able to believe a seasoned soldier like him could be so badly shaken.

He studied Elissa’s face, saw the streak of crimson that trickled down her cheek and dripped onto her cotton blouse. She was as white as alabaster, so pale he could see the blue veins running beneath her skin.

He squeezed his eyes closed against the fear for her still pulsing through him. She’d be all right, he told himself. She had to be. Head wounds always bled like the bloody devil. All he had to do was get her back to the army and into the hands of a surgeon. He studied the horizon. In the meantime, he had to be sure it was safe.

Tying the handkerchief snugly around her head, he rested her gently among the grasses, bent and kissed her forehead. “Rest easy, love. I’ll be back in a minute.” God, he didn’t want to leave her. She had risked her life to save him. He couldn’t bear the thought that she had been hurt because of him.

With a last check to be sure she was all right, he headed into the forest, circling off through the woods to the spot where the man had fired the shot. As he had guessed, their attacker was already gone. Adrian tracked the man to where his horse had been standing, saw that the animal had been shod with standard army-issue shoes, then hurriedly returned to the place he had left Elissa.

She was moaning softly as he knelt beside her. He eased her head into his lap and smoothed back her hair. “It’s all right, love. I’m going to get you back so the surgeon can take care of you.”

She moaned again and her eyes fluttered open. “Adrian?”

Relief trickled through him, but worry swiftly replaced the emotion. “I’m right here, angel.”

“My head hurts.” She touched his makeshift bandage. “I’m think … I think I’m bleeding.”

His stomach twisted, tightened into a knot. “Someone shot you. Or more likely they were shooting at me. You stepped in front of a musket ball and it grazed the side of your head. We need to get you back so a surgeon can take care of you.”

Elissa reached for his hand, alarm in her pretty blue eyes. “The man with the gun … is he … is he still out there?”

He shook his head. “The coward is long gone.”

“Did … did you see who it was?”

“No, but I intend to find out.” He didn’t tell her the man was a soldier, that he could be any one of the men they were living among each day. He didn’t want her to worry—he just wanted her to be all right. “Put your arms around my neck. I’m going to lift you up and set you in front of me on the saddle.”

Elissa nodded weakly, and her slim arms locked around his neck. When he lifted her against his chest, tiny tremors ran through her, and the knot in his stomach tightened with painful force.

Speaking quietly to Minotaur, who had shied a few steps at the sound of the gun, Adrian carried her to the animal’s side, placed her gently up on the saddle, then swung himself up behind her. Settling her against his chest, he wrapped his arm tightly around her waist, then nudged the big horse forward.

At the pace they were forced to travel, it took longer than he imagined to catch up with the archduke’s army. By the time they drew even with the long column of marching men, Elissa was asleep in his arms. His chest ached at the sight of the blood on her face, the streaks of scarlet in her pretty blond hair. It was his fault she had been hurt. His fault for bringing her along. The thought made him sick to his stomach.

Adrian swore beneath his breath. God’s blood, he had known how dangerous this was. He should have forbidden her to come, should never have let her leave Vienna. He looked down at the dark blond lashes resting against her pale cheeks. He was supposed to protect her and he had failed. She could have died out there today and he would have been the one to blame.

His stomach rolled at the image of his beautiful angel lying dead and lifeless in the hot Austrian sun. His body shook to think of it and a cold sweat broke out on his forehead.

For the first time he realized how much he had come to care for her, how much she had come to mean. When had it happened? How had she slipped past his defenses? How had she broken through the wall he had built to protect himself and burrowed her way into his heart?

The breeze lifted her fine pale hair against his cheek, and he wanted to awaken her, assure himself that she was all right. He heard her gentle breathing and he wanted to put his hand over her heart to be certain the beat was strong, that she would not die and leave him.

It came to him like a blow out of nowhere—bloody hell, he was in love with her!

God’s breath—it couldn’t be true. He couldn’t have been that stupid, couldn’t possibly have allowed it to happen. It wasn’t true, he told himself. He cared for her, yes. Too damned bloody much. But love? Love was for fools and dreamers, and he had long ago stopped being one of them.

She awakened just then, stirring a little, relaxing when she realized she rode in his arms. “Are we there yet?”

He tried for a smile but only a faint curve touched his lips. “I can see the end of the column just ahead.”

“I’m feeling a little bit better. My head doesn’t hurt so much.”

He pressed a soft kiss on her forehead. “I’m going to find you a surgeon. It’s nearly the end of the day. Soon they’ll be stopping to set up camp and you’ll be able to rest.”

Elissa nodded faintly, closed her eyes, and burrowed into his shoulder. So innocent. So trusting. Adrian mulled over what had happened to her this day, the gut-tightening, mind-numbing loss of control that had gripped him—and what he meant to do about it.

It occurred to him the last person she should ever have trusted was him.

*   *   *

Inside their makeshift tent, Elissa awoke with a start. Her head was banging, hammering away at her temple. She gingerly reached up to touch it, felt a swath of cotton tied next to her ear. She shifted on the pallet, her fingers reaching out, searching for Adrian, but he wasn’t there. Outside the tent, the army was up and moving about; she could hear the neighing of horses and the jangle of harness.

Still, it took a moment to get her bearings, to remember the shooting that had occurred yesterday afternoon. She recalled Adrian’s care of her, so tender, so concerned, seeing to her every need. As he had promised, he had carried her directly to a surgeon, waited for the man to assure him she would be all right, that the wound was only superficial, then he had left her alone.

Elissa thought back to those last, final moments. There was something in his face, a distance that hadn’t been there before. She had forced herself to ignore it, told herself it was only worry, concern about the injury she had suffered. But in her heart she was afraid that something had changed in the hours since the shooting, and a coil of fear clutched at her insides.

She didn’t want to lose him. Not when he had begun to care, perhaps begun to accept her into his life. Worry churned in her stomach. Fear for the future, terror that she might lose him. She wished she knew what he was thinking. As soon as she had the chance, she would ask him, she decided, find out the truth.

But part of her was afraid of the answer. And part of her suspected she should be.

*   *   *

Adrian ducked his head through the opening of General Klammer’s tent. He straightened to receive a salute from Major Becker, then turned and saluted the general.

“You sent for me, sir?”

Klammer nodded. He was a stout, graying man, barrel-chested and hard-edged, fit, and stamped with the look of a seasoned soldier. “Word just arrived this morning, Colonel. More bad news, I’m afraid.” His gaze shifted down to the paperwork on his desk. “As you know, our retreat has been covered by General Hiller’s Third Corps. His objective was to buy time, allow us to reassemble, and give Vienna a chance to muster its defenses. Unfortunately, just north of the river Traun, the French converged on Hiller’s army. Both Lannes and Masséna attacked. The bridge, the castle, and the village at Ebersberg were completely overrun.”

“Casualties?” Adrian asked, feeling the chill of another defeat run through his blood.

“Perhaps three thousand, as many as four thousand captured.”

“And Hiller?”

“Headed north to Enns, then most likely on to Krems for a Danube crossing.”

“Which leaves Vienna directly in Bonaparte’s path.”

“The city will be summoning its defenses and the army will soon be regrouping.”

But would it be enough? “Is there anything I can do?” Adrian asked.

“Perhaps there will be, Colonel, once Hiller has arrived. Your regiment is stationed just east of Vienna, is that not correct?”

“The last I heard.”

“Any word on the coalition?”

“Still nothing official. But rest assured, General Klammer, England stands solidly behind the archduke and his men. If there is any way we can be of service—”

“The best service you British could provide would be to send us some forty or fifty thousand men. Since that is not likely, there’s another task I would have you do.”

“Which is?”

“I believe you have met my wards, the Petralo children.”

“Yes, sir, I have. They seem like a very nice family.”

“I want you to take them to Vienna. At present, the capital is the safest place for them. Can I trust you to see it done?”

Adrian nodded. “Of course, General Klammer.” He didn’t want to leave, not after the shooting, not when he was closing in on the Falcon, but it seemed he had no choice. And it was definitely the excuse he needed to return Elissa to safety.

His attention strayed across the tent to where Major Becker stood beside the tent flap, his spine erect, his expression, as usual, inscrutable. Adrian wished he could voice his suspicions to Klammer, but until he had some sort of proof, the effort would be futile. And the fact remained, only the archduke and his closest advisors knew Adrian was there to find the traitor. Until the identity of the Falcon was known for sure, every person was suspect, even the general. Adrian didn’t dare take the risk.

“I’ll expect you to leave first thing in the morning,” Klammer said. “Ivan Petralo was once a soldier in my command. He was an old and trusted friend. I’ll expect you to keep his family safe.”

“Yes, sir.”

“That will be all, Colonel.”

Adrian managed a smart salute, turned on his heel, and strode outside. Making his way across the encampment, he found Elissa dressed and sitting on a blanket outside their small tent, a clean white bandage wrapped around her forehead. A few feet away, his aide, Lieutenant Helm, was in the process of pulling up stakes and seeing to their meager amount of gear.

“How are you feeling?” Adrian asked, coming down on a knee beside her. “I’ve arranged for you to ride in the back of one of the wagons. I want you to rest as much as you can.”

“I’m much better today. Nearly back to normal. ‘Twas only a graze, after all. Even the doctor said the wound was superficial.”

Guilt whispered through him. She shouldn’t have been there at all. “Even so, you will rest in the wagon.” He thought that she might argue but she only pursed her lips.

“Lieutenant Helm said you had gone to see Klammer.” She accepted his hand, let him help her to her feet and pull her out of the way of the soldiers working around them. “Is there news?”

“Nothing good, I’m afraid. Another big battle, this one at Ebersberg. Hiller lost to Lannes and Masséna. Napoleon is bearing down on us and it won’t be long before he reaches Vienna.”

“Charlie will stop him. He’ll do whatever it takes to protect the capital.”

“That’s right. Which means that is the safest place for you, Elissa.”

“What!”

“General Klammer has ordered me to take the Petralo family on to Vienna. I’m taking you there with them.”

“But that’s insane! I can’t possibly leave here now. We have to stay with the army. We have to find the Falcon.”

“We’ve done all we can.”

Elissa’s chin went up. “What about the shooting? Becker must have been behind it. Surely that means we are getting close. It is only a matter of time until you catch him passing secrets.”

“I pray that is so. In the meantime, I want you safe.” She started to argue but Adrian cut her off. “Yesterday someone tried to kill us. If you won’t think of yourself, think of your brother. Should the Falcon discover the connection between Karl and you and Peter, you could be putting Peter’s life in danger.”

Elissa chewed her bottom lip, studying him beneath her thick dark-gold lashes, and Adrian glanced away, hoping to avoid the question in her eyes.

“What about you?” she asked softly. “Will you be staying with me in Vienna?”

His stomach tightened. He wasn’t going to stay, at least not for long. “I’m a soldier, Elissa. I go where I am sent.” He reached out and took her hand, gently kissed her fingers. “Please … you must trust me to do what is best. I’ll get Becker for you—or whoever this traitor is. I give you my word.”

Her eyes searched his. She looked as though she wanted to protest, but in the end she did not. He thought that perhaps her head was hurting more than she let on, and her face still looked a little pale.

“When do we leave?” she asked.

“Tomorrow morning. You can spend the evening with your brother. We’ll get a good night’s sleep and be on our way at dawn.”

Elissa merely nodded, but tension tightened her features and her face looked taut and strained. He wondered what she was thinking.