Di Genta dropped me off at the dorm. “Thanks for everything, Ms. D.” It felt good to call her that.
I made my way over to Joyce.
“How did it go with your mom?” Joyce brushed her bangs away from her eyes.
My voice squeaked. “Ms. D asked her to blink if she wanted to let me know she loved me. And she did!”
Joyce almost bounced. “Did she wake up from the coma?”
“No. But she heard me say I loved her.”
“That’s awesome, Darlene.”
“It’s great. Any news on Cherry?”
“Actually, yes.” She grabbed my shoulders. “There’s a rumor that the state patrol found her unconscious in the woods last night. And she’s in the hospital. But like I said, some staff say that’s what they heard. Nobody’s giving details.”
We stopped talking for roll call. Then most of C dorm left. Only three of us were on restriction from the cafeteria. The two other girls would have nothing to do with me.
Simpson was on duty. “Ladies, Darius is coming with your meals. He’s gonna cover for me here.”
I felt nauseous thinking about Darius.
Darius brought in the dinners. “Come and get it,” he said.
Just before Simpson left, I saw Darius hand him some- thing he’d taken out of his pocket.
He seemed agitated as he started rifling through the desk, opening and shutting the drawers. He bent down and felt around on the floor.
I picked up my tray and sat down in one of the chairs. Darius walked over to me. “I heard you had a day pass to visit your mom,” he said. “I see you didn’t run on your teacher’s watch.”
“I’m sorry I got you in trouble.” I moved, facing the other direction. “Just want to do my time and get out of here.”
Darius pushed back his broad shoulders. He watched as I picked through the chicken and rice with my fork. The other two girls ate quickly. It wasn’t long before they asked Darius for permission to watch TV.
He told them yes. “You know that thing I asked you to do?” he whispered. “To pay me back for the favor I did?”
“I remember.” I knew he didn’t work the nightshift in C dorm. So I thought it was safe to offer. “I can do it tonight, if you want.”
Did he really like me? Or was I just another picture for his collection? My heart was in a battle. I wanted to believe Darius cared about me, but I needed to be on my guard. He’d taken pictures of other girls. Who was I kidding?
“Not tonight. I’ll let you know when I fill in for one of your dorm’s staff.” He gave me that wink.
“Okay,” I said. “By the way, do you know anything about Cherry being found?”
“Rumors. I’m sure that’s all they are.”
“I saw a couple of patrol cars in the lot when we got back today.”
Darius wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. “I honestly don’t know,” he said.
Simpson entered. “Thanks, man. I owe you.”
After dinner, Joyce finally quit asking if I was all right. I wasn’t all right. I wish I had told Ms. D about the pictures I found when I had the chance. I decided I had to let her know. But how?
If I wrote in my journal, she’d be able to read it when I turned in one of my assignments. I wrote on the second page of the journal.
Ms. D,
Remember the question I asked in the car? Well, I need to talk to you as soon as possible. Can you see me after school today? It’s very important.
Darlene
The rest of the weekend I played pool with Joyce and watched TV to keep my mind off my problems. I stayed out of Simpson’s way. He’d been meaner than usual lately.
I felt heavy with worry and regret.
Sunday night I flipped through the blank pages of my journal. I’m not sure why I did. But sometimes I did things for no reason. On the last page I noticed a note written in pencil.
Dear Darlene,
I hope you never read this, because if you do it means you got caught and brought back to Buckeye. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you about Darius. I know how much you love him. But, Darlene, you have to believe me, he’s trouble. He’s getting some of the girls to pose naked for him. They tried to get me to, but I refused. But I think they got some pictures of me when I didn’t know. Some of the others were given restrictions or other kinds of discipline for not going along. No one will narc because Sophie can really hurt you. No one would believe it anyway.
I have to run because they think I’m going to say something. Don’t worry about me. I’ll pack food. I’m not afraid of the woods. I’ve hidden in worse places before.
Your best friend,
Cherry
I gripped the sheets, twisting them between my fingers.