The sketch comedy show The Kids In The Hall ran on the CBC from 1988 to 1994. Try to enjoy these standout quotes, even though somebody’s “crushing your head” right now.
“Forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do, for they walk through this life in toe-crampity shoes.”
—Scott Thompson (as Jesus)
“I once shot a man just to watch him die, then I got distracted and missed it. Oh, my friends tried to describe it to me, but it just isn’t the same.”
“All right now, son, I want you to get a good night’s rest. And remember, I could murder you while you sleep. It’s easy, son, all you have to do is be quiet and willing to do it. And son, I am willing to do it. And, I’ve got quiet shoes. Good night, son. Sleep well.”
“Hi, I’m Kevin McDonald. Or, as you might know me at home, ‘the Kid in the Hall we don’t like.’”
“I believe the aliens are here to collect decorative spoons.”
“The hard thing about being a mass murderer isn’t the murdering part. It’s the mass part.”
“In closing, as you lay there convalescing in your hospital bed, I’m forced to wonder, what were you doing riding your bike on the sidewalk anyway? SideWALK? Maybe sometimes we bring heartache upon ourselves. Signed, the guy that collapsed your trachea.”
“So when people say to me ‘let sleeping dogs lie,’ I say to them, friend, sleeping dogs—they eventually wake up...and chew out the throat of democracy!”
“When I was born, my mother mistook the afterbirth as my twin. And the cuter one, too, apparently, as I was immediately sold to the cleaning woman for a stamp.”
“An optimist says, ‘The drink is half full.’ A pessimist says, ‘The drink is half full, but I might have bowel cancer.’”
“I’m a Canadian. It’s like an American, but without the gun.”
The world’s largest fossilized dinosaur dung was found in Saskatchewan in 1995 The Igloo Church in Inuvik is 23 meters in diameter.