Hey, did you hear about the Mountie who chased down hockey-playing moose on foot? We heard it from our neighbor’s friend’s dog’s cousin’s aunt-in-law...and she swears it’s true!
LEGEND: An American tourist was visiting Canada when he suffered cardiac arrest. After he was rushed to a hospital, doctors found traces of nicotine in his blood, which he is severely allergic to. “I don’t even smoke!” insisted the patient. He told doctors he hadn’t had anything different to eat or drink since he got to Canada . . . except for a coffee at Tim Hortons. Subsequent lab tests of the restaurant chain’s coffee showed trace levels of nicotine. The highly addictive chemical was also found in their baked goods . . . which explains the long lines at Tim Hortons.
HOW IT SPREAD: Another scary email forward, going back at least as far as 2002.
THE TRUTH: If you don’t believe Tim Hortons’ insistence that their food has no nicotine, MSG, or any other rumored substances, the CFIA (Canadian Food Inspection Agency) backs them up. Tim Hortons are so good simply because of good ol’ caffeine, sugar, and fat.
LEGEND: A hundred years ago, a little girl from Niagara Falls escaped from a farmhouse fire. Screaming, and with her clothes burning, she ran down a hill and into a tunnel…where she succumbed to the flames. Today, if you go into the center of the 16-foot-high, 125-foot-long “Screaming Tunnel” and light a match, you’ll hear the doomed girl’s screams...and then the match will go out.
HOW IT SPREAD: Around campfires, at slumber parties, and other places where ghost stories are told. This legend is particularly popular due to its close proximity to one of Canada’s most visited tourist spots. The details of the legend vary—one version says the girl was burned by her abusive stepfather; in another, a local butcher, obsessed with the girl, burned down the farmhouse to flush her out. But the story always ends with her screams.
THE TRUTH: Paranormal investigators and adventure seekers have entered the tunnel to light matches and listen for screams for decades. Indeed, the matches usually go out, but that’s because of the strong winds present in the tunnel. The creepy location no doubt adds to the allure of this legend. But there’s no evidence that a little girl ever died here. One theory as to the source of the legend: There once was a farmhouse in the woods above the tunnel. A mentally unstable woman was reported to have lived there. To relieve stress, she would hide in the center of the tunnel and scream at the top of her lungs. Over time, as the stories got passed down, the troubled woman became a ghost girl.
Ottawa-born impressionist Rick Little once hosted The Tonight Show in Johnny Carson’s voice.
LEGEND: This is the “actual transcript” of a radio conversation that took place between a U.S. Navy carrier captain and Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995.
American: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision.
Canadian: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.
American: This is the Captain of a U.S. Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.
Canadian: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.
American: This is the aircraft carrier USS Lincoln, the second largest ship in the United States’ Atlantic fleet! We are accompanied by three destroyers, three cruisers, and numerous support vessels. I demand that YOU change your course 15 degrees north, or countermeasures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.
Canadian: This is a lighthouse. Your call.
HOW IT SPREAD: Most recently, via the Internet. But variations of this story go back to the years following World War II.
TRUTH: This exchange never took place, but that doesn’t stop motivational speakers from using it as a “real” example of what happens when you let your bullheadedness get in the way of the facts. When asked by the Virginia Pilot if this scenario is even possible, a U.S. Navy spokesman said it’s “completely bogus.” Even in heavy fog (which doesn’t even appear in most versions of this legend), a state-of-the-art military ship would not mistake a lighthouse for a vessel. But if you don’t believe the U.S. Navy, a lighthouse keeper from British Columbia named Jim Abram told the business magazine Fast Company, “I’ve been lighthouse keeping for 21 years, and no one’s ever thought that I was in anything but a lighthouse.”
Patrick Burns, a meat packer from Oshawa, started his successful biz with the name “Burns Meats.”