I awake with my hand between my legs. The tendrils of my dream follow me in a slow descent to awareness, and I hold on to the details a little longer, replaying how kissable lips trailed over my sensitive nipples, how thick hair slipped through my fingers like silk, and how a warm, wet tongue lapped between my folds.
Mostly, I remember the brilliant gaze of a lion watching me from the shadows.
I allow myself the touch of my fingers, gliding through slick flesh and rubbing steady circles on my needy clit. The pressure rises, nearing the breaking point. With a whimpering groan, I yank my hand away and curse Liam for urging me to make a promise I now regret.
And then I curse Sebastian for invading such a private, sexually explicit dream.
Most of all, I rail at Vance for the images I’ll never get out of my head.
After using the bathroom and dressing for breakfast, I make my way into the main sitting room. The French doors to the balcony stand open, and I spot Lilith at the railing with her back to me. She’s gazing at the sea, coffee mug clutched in one hand. Her hair cascades down her back in a tangled mess from Vance’s fingers last night.
A black satin negligee falls to her ankles, stirred by the breeze. For some reason, the sight of her elicits a sympathetic tug at my heart. There’s an aura of sadness surrounding her, as if she finds the haze of early morning compatible with whatever’s going through her head. She’s an enigma, self-assured and confident one moment, and quiet and contemplative the next.
I watch her for several seconds, my presence unknown until she turns and catches me staring.
“Vance was called out on an emergency,” she says, her attention going to the spread of food awaiting us on the table. “He won’t be joining us for breakfast.”
“It wouldn’t be the first time.” I take a seat, unsure of what to do or say, and reach for the kettle of tea. “He’s very dedicated to his job.”
“Dedication and loyalty are two of his strengths.”
We fall into a stretch of disquiet, and I can’t stand the awkwardness, especially after the experience we shared last night.
“Do you love him?” I grab the creamer cup by its dainty handle and add a splash to my tea.
She raises a brow. “I don’t think that’s any of your business.”
“I think it is, considering he could win the auction.”
The corner of her mouth tilts up in a sardonic smile. “Who are you really asking about? Vance or Sebastian?”
A moment of hesitation, and then I go for honesty. “Both?”
“Well, there’s your answer.”
I tilt my head. “So you’re in love with both of them?”
“In different ways, yes.”
“But you can’t have both.”
She scoffs, setting her coffee on the table. “Aside from you thinking it’s appropriate to tell me what I can and can’t do, the truth is I can’t have either of them. Our laws won’t allow it.”
“What if we could change the laws?” It’s wishful thinking, but I can’t help but ask. “Who would you choose?”
Her scornful laugh clashes with the serenity of morning. “We’re second-class citizens in this twisted society. We don’t get choices.”
“Humor me.”
She folds her arms. “Okay, I’ll play along. What about you? Would you choose Sebastian?”
I mash my lips together, unsure of how to explain. Somehow, she seems to get it though.
“It’s not so easy, is it?” She sinks into the chair across from me. “Seems indecision curses us both.” A shadow darkens her green eyes.
“Maybe after next month, I’ll gain a little clarity.” Sadness steals my tone because I don’t want to hurt anyone, and even though the outcome of the auction isn’t up to me, I want to be true to myself.
If I make a choice, it should be for me.
“I know you and Sebastian have this…” she trails off with an eye-roll, “this intense thing going on, but who’s the other lucky bastard to win the heart of the queen?”
“You think what we have is intense?” I’m stunned she picked up on it, unless she’s been talking to her brother.
Our brother.
She laughs. “Good God, you’re cute.” She takes a long sip of her coffee, closing her eyes as it slides down her throat, and then her knowing gaze cuts right through me. “You have it bad.”
“I do not.”
“Oh, you do. I asked you a question, and you skipped right over it to the important part. That tells me everything I need to know.”
“I hardly think that tells you everything.”
“You’re right,” she says with a nod. “You still didn’t give me an answer.”
“If you must know, it’s Liam. He’s the other lucky bastard.” My tone mocks her, and I don’t hide it.
“Not a bad choice.” She shoots me a smug smile. “That man can go for hours in bed.”
I’m mid-drink when she drops that on me, causing me to spew tea everywhere. “You slept with him?” It’s more accusation than question, my voice shrill as I use a napkin to blot up the sputtered liquid.
She smirks. “It was only one night. The man’s insatiable, but so is Sebastian.”
Sickness rises in my throat, burning too much like possessive jealousy. Unable to look at her, I eye the spread of food on the table, from fruit and yogurt to sausage and eggs, though I don’t have the urge to sample any of it.
She doesn’t have the same problem. I feel her attention on me, assessing my reaction as she butters a croissant. “They’re men, Novalee. You can’t hold it against them.”
My recently conditioned mind tells me she’s right, but my heart doesn’t agree.
“Well, the past is in the past,” I say with a feigned shrug, doing my best not to hold it against them. At least, I try.
She bites into the flaky bread and licks her lips. “You’re so goddamn young and innocent. Our pasts shape who we are. If you think you’ll find prince charming at the end of this circus, you might want to brace yourself.”
“Why do you say that?”
She stands, abandoning the rest of her breakfast. “A word of advice,” she says as she halts next to me. “You should focus on Liam, because Sebastian’s past isn’t going anywhere. The quicker you accept that, the better.”
I watch her sashay her way through the sitting room, hips swaying in her skin-hugging nightie, and her parting shot leaves an intolerable taste on my tongue, as if I swallowed a bitter pill.
But there’s a hint of truth in her words, an in-my-face reminder that she and Sebastian have a history, and she just made it clear it won’t become obsolete once I enter the House of Leo.