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After the self-regulatory countries of Europe, the hard-working people of China, and the many islands without any fences, the US with all its gated areas appeared like an uninviting prison. Even Orleans which had been such a friendly small-town, now was marked by the gray fences around the fire station and the high school gym. I couldn’t wait to get to our house, hoping that they’d still be there and the VCP hadn’t raided it as well. From the outside, the grey window paint really made it look as abandoned as we wanted it to.
“Hello, I’m home”, I yelled when I entered, impatiently waiting for an answer because I finally wanted to share my experiences from the past days. My spirits had been lifted by at least three times since the day at the medical congress. Meeting Serena had given me so much perspective and being fueled up with new adrenaline I felt like I finally had a shot at this.
“Thank God, you are back.” Alex exhaled and was by my side. “What on earth took you so long?” His eyebrows were pulled together to a serious frown. He didn’t even greet me with a kiss.
“I’m sorry. It was so hard to find dying people to get new energy.” I lay my arms around his neck, feeling the strength of his muscles.
“So, you, too.” He swallowed. “It’s not only me who has trouble finding anything to eat.”
“No, not by far. I met some wizards who were in a very desperate situation.” I looked behind Alex into the empty living room. “Where is everyone else?”
“Melissa is searching for more food supplies and Luke is somewhere close to Eddie’s work shed. Eddie is in the shed.”
“Alright.” I dropped onto the couch.
“You don’t understand.” Alex sat next to me. “We had to lock Eddie into the shed. It’s the only place where he is calm enough to stay in one place. Now Luke is there to watch after him.”
I put my hand over my mouth. “What happened?”
“Let’s put it like this. Eddie has a strong urge to wander. Luke had to go after him the whole time and running everywhere, all the time was too exhausting. If we knew he’d take the serum and if the world wasn’t in such a magic-hating state right now, we could let him go live on his own.” Alex sighed, and his chest deflated a little. The chest I had imagined cuddling up against when the search for my next heart was at its hardest. “We also wanted to wait for you to get back. Perhaps your presence has a better effect on him than ours.” He puffed his cheeks.
“I wouldn’t see why. He doesn’t remember anything about us.” I pressed my lips into a flat line.
“Luke even managed to bring him to the institution where they keep his wife. We thought seeing her in flesh and blood would evoke some kind of emotion. Of course, he could only see her from a distance since his eyes are still an unchanged ocean. We couldn’t try contacts yet since we can’t go to the supermarkets.”
“But he didn’t recognize her?”
“No, no reaction at all from his side. Which is like a tragic comedy if you think about it. She lost her memory due to a bad reaction to a shot and forgot about him and now he forgot about her as well due to our serum.” He pulled his mouth to a flat line.
“It’s still a good serum though. If we’d have transformed him to save him from a fatal accident it would only benefit him to forget what happened. To start fresh as a Siren you have to cut the ties to your old life. Just look how humans can be turned against magic because there is something that scares them. The longer I watch what is going on, the more I understand why we can’t show ourselves to humans.” That thought had been forming in my head for a while, but this was the first time I spoke it out loud.
“Wow, what kind of new insight is that? Are you still the same person?” Alex’s eyes widened.
“We sat in a room full of highly educated people and they all bought a crappy explanation about some people cursing the world. Sometimes magic can turn bad, like with uncontrollable Sirens or Vampires who attack humans. However, it’s in their nature. They don’t mean anything bad by it and it doesn’t mean all magical creatures are dangerous. However, imagine if humans knew about that.” Would I betray my family if I didn’t tell them about my new life? I wasn’t completely sure yet whether it would include them as well. I was speaking about humanity and the magical world in general. “But, yeah, I think in general not remembering your past will make it easier for new Sirens and Eddie will be alright.” He was probably simply missing the open ocean, as Serena had suggested.
“What if you have to change me one day and then I won’t remember you?” Alex said sullenly.
“If that ever were the case, it won’t be for a long, long time. Who knows whether the serum develops until then?” I kissed him, and he pressed my head against his a little longer when I wanted to pull back. “Even if you forgot about me, I’d stick around until you’d fall in love with me again.” I smiled. “But I want to see you grow older, so don’t do anything stupid.”
“It’s not about doing anything stupid, it’s about us all starving to death soon.” His jaw tensed. I should just go to a town shelter and let you do your job.”
“No, we’ve talked about that. We couldn’t stay in contact then. We need you here for the serum.” I insisted.
“I am neither strong nor fast enough to look after Eddie and none of you plan on changing another Siren soon.” He said, calmer now. “I’m of no use here, I’m hungry and I still waste your time with looking for something to eat for me.”
“But it will all be over soon, I’m sure of that.” I took his hands excitedly.
“What makes you say that now? Did you get a chance to talk to Roisin after all?”
My shoulders sank. “No, I don’t know what she is up to. This doesn’t have anything to do with her. The reason why it took me so long to get back is because I met the first Siren that ever existed. She is still alive!” I couldn’t hide my excitement. “And she taught me the Siren’s song.” I gave Alex a meaningful look and a crease appeared on his forehead. “She knows a lot about the world. Probably even more than the Orbiters. She thinks if I sing once I’m close to Monica, I can distract her enough so that the Orbiters can get through to her. Monica is the woman who controls Dr. Palmer.” The words bubbled out of me.
Alex frowned as he was thinking. “Or if not, she will kill you because you are a weirdo who is chanting a magical curse.” He took a breath. “This doesn’t all have to rely on you. We could mobilize some other people in the shelters, get them to revolt and not idly stay in there and wait in line for meals and showers.”
“A revolution would lead to many more killed innocents,” I said a bit heated. “The Orbiters must have picked Sirens for a reason and Serena confirmed it. If this won’t work, nothing will.”
“So, let another Siren sing. It doesn’t have to be you.” He squeezed my hands.
“We have so much more knowledge than everybody else. Plus, apparently, all the other Sirens have lost their voices. That’s why they transformed me in the beginning.” I puffed my cheeks, thinking out loud. “I could try to teach Melissa though and see if she can sing as well. Perhaps Serena and the Orbiters are wrong about that. The more, the better.”
Alex wasn’t entirely happy with that answer and crossed his arms in front of him. “Sing for me then, and we’ll see what kind of effect it has.”
I bit my lower lip. True, I had no idea whether my singing really had an effect on humans. There hadn’t been anybody on the island. Nervousness crept into my body and I wiped my sweaty palms on my pants. “It’s exhausting,” I said but got up. “But okay, I’ll show you.” I took a deep breath. I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate on my inner energy flows again. I seriously concentrated on myself for at least two minutes but then I realized I’d never have so much time when it came down to it. Then, I became aware of Alex expectantly staring at me, which was kind of embarrassing. My focus fell apart and obviously, I then didn’t even manage to produce a slight shiver. “I can’t focus.” I cringed. “I need to practice, and I should talk to Serena again. She told me to bring Eddie to her anyway.”
“Good plan.” Alex said in a monotone voice and then insisted again, “I still think if the humans revolted, at some point the VCP wouldn’t stand a chance. We are more than them.”
“Yes, but we have always been more than them and still they control everything now.” I was getting annoyed. Why was he being so difficult? Before he could say anything else, I cut in again, “You said Eddie is in his work shed? Maybe I should go there now and once Melissa is here, we can discuss when I bring him to Serena. Perhaps, I should take Melissa with me then as well, so she can also learn how to sing.”
Alex puffed his cheeks. “So, you’ll be leaving again soon?”
“Yeah.” I sighed and looked into his concerned eyes. “But not for long and afterward we’ll approach Monica.”
“Off you go then.” He stared at my face with a stony expression, which was worse than swearing at me or arguing. It created a huge gap between us although I was only standing a meter in front of him.
“Don’t be like that.” My posture deflated, a bit insecure whether I really was doing something wrong.
“Like what?”
“Like I had a choice and chose to leave you.” I spat.
He sighed and pulled me toward him by my hand. “I know, I’m sorry. I just hate that you are doing everything, and I am doing nothing.” I wanted to object but he was faster. “No matter what you say, nothing will change this fact.”
“Alex”, I said slowly and distinctly, trying not to lose my temper, “Don’t let your ego problems get between us. I don’t want to have a bad feeling because of things I am forced to do. You know I wished I weren’t the one they chose to fight Monica. If you want to do something, be the kind man I love. The one I can come to and feel safe.” I stared at the ground.
“I don’t have ego problems.” He muttered. “But what you forget is, that you are my safety point as well. I need you to be okay.” He massaged my hips.
I nodded, my throat too choked up to talk. I sat down on his lap for a moment, putting my arms around his neck, feeling his stubbles on my cheek.
“You should see after Eddie now,” Alex said.
“See you later,” I whispered and gave him a kiss.
“See you later,” he nodded.
I hurried over to the glass blower’s shed, knocked and entered. Luke was in there reading something and Eddie was lying on the workbench with his arms crossed. Was he trying to sleep? That didn’t make any sense.
The whole room looked different as well. Somebody had given it a good cleaning. The familiar layers of dust had disappeared and none of the tools were lying around anywhere. The smell of the oven was gone as well, which hit me with sadness. It was as if the soul of this place had slipped out. Of course, they couldn’t turn the oven on again or otherwise, the VCP would probably blow the house to pieces.
Luke was next to me, giving me a hug and asking what had taken me so long. Eddie still laid there with his eyes closed and arms crossed.
“It was more difficult to find a heart than imagined.” I didn’t want to say the rest before I was sure Eddie was listening. “What is he up to?” I pointed with my eyes to the corpse-like figure.
“Since it got a bit dangerous to run continuously and go so far away from here, we decided to hang out here. However, now he says the days seem endless. He is trying to fall asleep to be able to get rid of at least some hours”, Luke scratched his head. “He’s been like that for over a day.”
“Do you think he’s been successful?” I narrowed my eyes.
“Nope,” Eddie said without moving.
“If you don’t mind being motionless for so long, you’d be good at meditation.” I smiled and stepped to the table. “I’ve found a place where you’ll like it better. Apparently, you are one of the Sirens who is more drawn to the ocean than others.”
He opened one of his blue eyes and tried to find me with it. Then, I told Luke and Eddie about Serena and how she was expecting me to bring him back.
“Wow, over two thousand years.” Luke shook his head in disbelief. “And what does a Siren sound like? Sing for us?”
I laughed, embarrassed because, since the failed attempt with Alex just before, I wasn’t so sure whether I could even still do it. “Ever since I sang, I feel like I’m some kind of circus animal which needs to do tricks on cue.”
“Well, if we had to wait for almost two thousand years until a Siren sings again, you can’t blame us that we want to hear it.” Luke said.
I pressed my lips into a tight line. “I need to practice more. Without people around me. You make me nervous and it doesn’t work.” I exhaled. “I tried in front of Alex and I couldn’t do it.”
Luke’s posture deflated a little. “Okay, you go practice then. You better be able to do it with people around once this Monica is standing in front of you.”
“Yeah, no pressure.” I puffed my cheeks.
Eddie had been listening with open eyes and now sat up. “I’d like to go there and meet her.”
“Great, that’s the spirit.” I made a fist.
“Can I come as well?” Luke asked. “I don’t think anybody knows she is still alive and so meeting her would be quite cool.”
I slowly nodded. “She only mentioned Eddie. I don’t want her to feel like a zoo animal that everybody will come and stare at. There’s probably a reason why nobody found her sooner.” I pulled one corner of my mouth downward.
“I guess that’s true.” He pressed his lips together.
“But I did want Melissa or you to come along because perhaps Serena could teach us both how to sing.”
“And since I’m more of a lucky outcome than a real Siren, it’s probably better if she goes.”
I frowned. “I didn’t say that.”
“Well, I’ve never read about mystical men luring lost sailors into death with their beautiful songs. Let’s not do more experiments, now that we seem so close to a showdown.”
A shiver went through me. “I’m not ready yet. Before we talk about any showdowns, let me practice some more.”
“So, what are we waiting for?” Eddie jumped up and clapped his hands. “Let’s meet this mysterious woman.”
We all returned to our house to wait for Melissa. I told Alex, Luke, and Eddie in detail, what state the various parts of the world were currently in.
Melissa arrived soon as well. She had gone to an actual supermarket in another country and brought some canned food and even meat.
“Thank you.” Alex looked at it with big eyes. “That will be the most delicious meal ever.”
Melissa smiled. “It’s about time that going food shopping gets such a positive reaction.”
We let her in on the plan of bringing Eddie to Serena. I didn’t even have to ask her to come as well. She was very curious about Serena and the Siren’s song.
I glanced at Alex. “At least you’ll have some decent meals now.” Luckily, he loved cooking on his little camping stove since we couldn’t count on electricity anymore.
“Yeah, I’ll be alright. Can I talk to you for a sec?” He got up, grabbed my hands and pulled me behind him. We disappeared into my room, where he had been sleeping for the past months. “It’s odd with everyone else around,” he said, once I shut the door and looked at him questioningly. “I hate that you have to leave and go so far all the time and I never know what is going to happen to you.” He sighed. “It’s killing me.” He kneaded his fingers.
“I hate to leave like this as well. When this is all over, we’ll go somewhere together, only the two of us, like the time we went camping.”
He pressed his lips into a tight line but nodded. “I miss you already.” He then pulled me closer to him. “But go get your voice. I know you could enchant the whole world if you have to. You’ve fully enchanted me without singing one note.” He even smiled a little.
I put my face in my hands and rubbed off the tension that I had felt before. “Thank you, I’m glad to hear you say that. Because so far, everybody else has done a lot and I haven’t done anything. Like you and Luke with the serum and Claire and Themba with Dr. Palmer. If I finally could do something, I don’t want to mess it up.” I let go of the breath I had been holding.
“You won’t, I’ll always believe in you.”
“Yes, please remind me next time, when I try to sing in front of someone and it doesn’t work.” I laughed shyly.
Alex kissed me behind my ear, on the spot that I liked so much and then on my mouth. Was it me or did this kiss feel like another one of those ‘memorable’ ones? A goodbye kiss. Once more we didn’t exactly know when we’d see each other again. It had a bittersweet taste.