We started this book by reminding you that for every action you take, including reading this book, you have a choice. The problem is that most of us are so overwhelmed half the time we have trouble giving ourselves the necessary space to make choices that are both consistent with our values and point us toward the life we want to lead.
It’s our hope that the principles and practices outlined in this book will help you achieve two intertwined goals: 1) Develop the skill and confidence to make good decisions at important times in your work and personal life, and 2) Develop the perspective to identify what you need to change in order to live your life the way you want to live it.
With these goals in mind, here are some simple reminders to keep you on the path toward greater agency:
• Actively monitor the things to which you give your attention. The many moments we are distracted, or distract ourselves, add up to minutes, hours, and days of missed opportunities to experience something richer, more lasting, fulfilling, and life-changing.
• Seek the company of good people, those who both support your positive aspirations, and aren’t afraid to challenge you when you need it. Minimize time spent with people who undermine you or are overly ingratiating.
• Take care of yourself by exercising, eating well, and developing good sleep habits. Each of these things is directly tied to your personal agency.
• Press yourself to be open to learning by asking questions, seeking out new perspectives, and surrounding yourself by people who are curious about and open to new things.
• Actively monitor your emotions and beliefs by developing the habit of reflecting on them. At moments when you find yourself seeking distractions, consider whether you’re avoiding strong feelings or emotions. It’s impossible to get the life you seek until you are really in touch with what you believe and feel about the things life has to offer.
• While it’s important to be open to others, remember too that only you, through quiet personal reflection, can know what you want and what is best for you. Trust and follow your intuition, while of course remaining open to information that suggests another direction.
• Use reason and deliberation over passion when making important decisions while never losing sight of your passion. Locate and use it to determine and pursue your own path in life.
If there’s one thing we learned in the course of researching and writing this book, it’s that developing and maintaining agency requires a commitment to these practices. It’s not the case that once you develop a healthy sense of agency you can stop giving thought to it and simply let yourself go. Many of the people described in this book—those who successfully developed greater agency—emphasize that it is an ongoing process that takes energy, practice, and patience. So that even in times when they feel exhausted or overwhelmed, they have learned to remind themselves that effort put toward agency-enhancing behavior now will always pay off in the long run.
The next time you sense something happening around you—or within you—that doesn’t feel quite right, don’t ignore it and reflexively press on. Exercise the discipline to stop. Pay attention to that signal. If the path you are on doesn’t seem right, pause, reflect, and get off. Put yourself onto a better path. If that path isn’t apparent, take the time to create and design one for yourself. Others may end up following your lead.
Finally, with greater agency, you will have greater influence over your life and greater impact on the lives of others. How you decide to use that power is a matter of deep importance to yourself, to those you love and care for, to those you work with, and to all the communities you touch. Be ethical. Be considerate. Be measured. While agency doesn’t come with a built-in moral or ethical navigation system, the seven principles help you to stay grounded and steady, maintain open-mindedness, pursue continuous learning, and increase your self-understanding, self-control, and understanding of others. And, in practice, the seven principles also encourage you to push yourself each day to develop greater acceptance and empathy toward others and consider the longer-term consequences of your actions. In other words, to become a humanist.
Our hope and most fervent wish for you:
Use your power of agency to do some good in your life and in the world. The world needs you.
Define success on your own terms. Make creative choices. Live your values and your passion … Don’t be afraid to go your own way.
Plant a tree. Help it grow. Maintain your connection to the earth.
Above all … Use your power of agency wisely to be the person you most want to be in the world. Enjoy your life.