Chapter 15

With her phone in hand, Helen lost her nerve and opted to text Kathy. I’m sorry for being such an arse and disappearing on you. Are you still speaking to me? X

She’d wandered around her brother’s house restlessly for half an hour, anxiously waiting for some sort of response and scared that her message would be met with silence. She knew she had a good thing—no, she has a great thing with Kathy, and the last thing she wanted to do was fuck it all up. Even so, she appeared to be doing a spectacular job of doing exactly that.

After several failed attempts to do a crossword puzzle, she pushed the paper to the side and looked out the window. There were few things that scared her, but the thought of losing Kathy had her nerves bundled. She paced back and forth eyeing the cooking sherry when her phone finally vibrated with a reply, and in her haste to open the text and fumbled, almost dropping the gadget in the dishwater. She took a deep breath before reading it.

Can you talk? X

Yes, x, Helen typed back quickly.

Seconds later, the phone vibrated and Kathy’s name flashed on the screen. “Hi, you, where are you?” Helen tried to sound as normal as possible and failed miserably.

“I’m just walking back to the office from court. I thought you were fucking dead, Helen!”

Helen pushed her reading glasses up onto the top of her head and pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m sorry. I haven’t handled this very well, have I? I’m sorry, honey, I didn’t mean to push you out or hurt you. I suppose you have every right to be mad at me.” She could hear the traffic in the background when Kathy became silent.

“I’m not mad, Helen. Disappointed that you couldn’t talk to me? Yes. Upset that you made me worry myself half to death? Yes. I love you and I want to be able to take care of you, but I do understand why you did it.”

Her understanding made Helen feel even more guilty. She picked up her cigarillos and lighter and headed out into the garden. Andrea would’ve killed her if she’d dared to light one in the house. “I know,” she said finally. “I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” She sat heavily in an ornate backed iron chair, scraping its feet across the wooden deck.

“You don’t need to make it up to me, just talk to me.”

“I will,” Helen promised. She owed her girlfriend that much, and if she wanted the relationship to work out, it was time to pull her head out of her backside and make it happen.

***

When the call ended, Kathy stepped into the lift and pressed the button. She still felt the relief of finding Helen’s message when she’d eventually got out of. Relief may have washed over her but the frustration and anger still lingered. Her mother’s words about finding ‘The One’ came back to her again and she realised that, despite Helen’s shortcomings, she really did love her.

After downing a double espresso once in her office, she finally felt some semblance of humanity creeping back into her bones. Helen was hers and hers alone and they would weather whatever storm that came their way. Quite simply, Kathy knew she couldn’t live without her. That thought jolted her as she hung her long woollen coat on the back of her office door and smoothed down her suit jacket. No one had ever been her ‘Forever’ until Doctor Helen Kennedy came into her life.

•••

Petra Smythe had no idea where she was driving to or how long the journey would take, but she’d seen Kathy disappear for enough weekends at a time to know that she headed somewhere out of the area. She wondered if it was to see her fancy woman who didn’t seem to be around all the time.

She’d filled the Micra’s tank in anticipation of being on the road for a while, and was glad she had, having been travelling for the past two hours. All she knew was that they were heading Northbound on the A1. It was taking all her concentration to keep Kathy in her sights, the Audi ahead of her that was able to travel a lot more smoothly than her little junker. Her eyes were growing more and more tired, but she knew the journey would be worth it in the end, wherever it led to. She chuckled to herself as she drove, the radio cranked playing the latest travel news. We’re going on a magical mystery tour!

After a little over five hours, Petra found herself in Newcastle upon Tyne, with its famous green half-moon bridge and the Sage arts venue glimmering like a giant silver condom in the night. Another fifteen minutes and Petra slowed as she watched Kathy turn into a well-hidden driveway, just off the main road. She parked in front of a row of houses a little further on and watched to see if the car re-emerged. After half an hour passed, she was satisfied that was where the mystery woman lived.

Dressed all in black, Petra crept down the winding driveway, using the shadow of bushes and trees to hide her from the moonlight. She stopped short when she saw the chocolate-box house at the end of the drive with Kathy’s car parked on the gravel. She scanned the windows to see which were lit and which weren’t, which showed signs of life and which didn’t. Sticking to the tree line, she moved as close as she could until movement in one of the rooms caught her eye. Through the blinds, she could make out the figures locked in a steamy embrace. Looks like I’ve found your hidey-hole, the silly little bitch.

•••

Kathy loved being consumed in Helen’s strong and tender embrace, the scent of her fragrance making her feel like she was home. She let her tongue tease Helen’s, flicking over her bottom lip and eliciting low groans when she plunged her tongue into her mouth. Jesus, I can’t get enough of her. She pulled back so they could both catch their breaths. They had quite a bit of air to clear between them first. The last thing Kathy wanted was for them both to lapse back into their version of normalcy with unresolved questions and issues hanging in the air. “Come on,” she said, taking her gently by the hand. “Let’s go and get comfortable.”

Helen absentmindedly rubbed the small feet nestled in her lap and stared into the dying embers of the log fire. It was well past 2: a.m. and the two of them had talked themselves hoarse about their fears and dreams, stopping only to lubricate themselves with Pinot. The one thing they both realised, was the fact that as much as they were both scared at the intensity of their new relationship, they were even more scared at the prospect of losing it.

Kathy had bitten the bullet and admitted her fears about having to compete with a ghost, and how she was afraid Helen could never love her that much. They both cried, and Kathy listened patiently as Helen had talked about Meg and the life that they’d shared. She shared more in the few hours than she had since their relationship began.

“And you are two totally different people,” Helen explained gently. “And, yes, I loved her with all my heart, but that heart broke and died along with her.” She paused, then, swirled the almost black liquid around in her glass, watching it coat the sides before taking a sip. “But I’m one of the lucky few. My heart grew back and it beats bigger and stronger than ever, and with this new heart, I’m able to love you with all of me.”

Kathy hadn’t been able to reply, so overcome with emotion with Helen’s beautiful and thoughtful words. Helen lay on her back, her hair out on the cushion behind her head, her empty glass cradled on her stomach. She looks so beautiful in profile, she thought as the orange embers reflected in Helen’s eyes. “What are you thinking?”

Helen took a deep breath; her features took on the look of a woman who had had the weight of the world lifted from her shoulders. “I’m thinking that I’m an extremely lucky woman to have the chance at true love twice in my life, and what a dolt I can be sometimes!” Her features broke into a warm smile and she squeezed Kathy’s toes. “Come on, lady, time for bed.”

•••

Helen’s fingers instinctively slid up and down the fretboard of the seashore metallic burst Ibanez bass guitar. She made the instrument sing, her foot tapping in time to the basic rock rhythm. It was the first-time Kathy had seen her wield the instrument, let alone heard her play, but something about the way the instrument almost became a part of her was a massive turn on.

She put the bass down and wiped the strings over gently with tender loving care, having already described the instrument as her baby. Tonight, would be the first gig of hers that Kathy had attended. It made her both nervous and excited.

Kathy plucked a peach from the wooden fruit bowl on the living room table and bit into the succulent, ripe flesh. The juices coated her lips in a way that drove Helen to distraction. She abandoned the instrument in the case and closed the distance between them, music long since forgotten, and pushed Kathy back against the sofa, bruising her lips with her own, she could taste the sweetness of the fruit.

Kathy gasped and giggled in surprise, “Maybe I should eat fruit with you more often! Time for an afternoon nap?” she asked coyly.

•••

From her car, Petra Smythe stretched her tired muscles. She was afraid to let Kathy out of her sight. She wanted to see everything she was doing with this bitch behind Anna’s back. I’ll make them both pay!

The car wasn’t exactly comfortable to spend so much time in, but at least she had dressed for the elements in plenty of layers and there was a small supermarket and café nearby to get plenty of coffee and snacks. She felt like a cop on a steak out, the thought made her giggle. No one seemed to notice her parked there, if they had, they didn’t approach her. It was nice to know that people in the North payed just as little attention to what went on around them as those in the South. It suited her purpose just fine.

By six in the evening, she was beginning to think that nothing was going to happen for the rest of the day. Kathy and Helen hadn’t left the house and the only exit was the winding driveway. Just as she was thinking of giving up for the night and booking herself a comfortable bed somewhere, an estate car slowed and turned into the concealed opening. Petra sat forward in her seat to get a better look.